Hooray! I actually wrote a chapter! It might take me awhile again because I've got the attention span of a gnat lately, but I'll try to get more chapters in soon. Thanks to the few people who actually like my story and read and review it.

Once again I don't own Sonic and thanks to Rawn for being my beta

'Alright! Let's get started on our next play,' I announced happily skipping to the center of the stage.

I was met by a sea of angry faces.

"Where the heck have you been?" Shadow asked. "It's been over a month since you updated!"

'I've been busy!' I protested. 'There was that writing contest that I lost. There was that test that I didn't study for. Then there were all those internet videos that needed to be watched. Honestly, it's a wonder I was able to do this.'

"You suck," Knuckles said flatly.

'Yes I'm aware of that,' I said my tone annoyed. 'Now if you don't mind we're going to continue on with our stories.' I cleared my throat to give the allusion that my next words were important. 'I have decided that for our next performance we will do the timeless classic, "Rumplestiltskin"!'

That owned a groan from my prisoners, I mean, cast members.

"Since when is Rumplestiltskin a timeless, classic tale?" Espio asked folding his arms.

'Since shut up,' I retorted stubbornly.

"What a great comeback," Sonic said sarcastically.

'That's it!' I snapped. 'Both of you are in a time-out! Go to the corner.'

Espio and Sonic looked at me in mock horror.

"Oh you're not going to force us to perform for other people's amusement?" Espio gasped. "Oh the horror."

Sonic laughed not even trying to hide his amusement.

'I'm going to lock you in a cramped, dark closet,' I threatened. 'If you want to know what dark spaces can do to a person just look at Tails.'

Sonic and Espio looked in the direction of the two-tailed fox. Tails was currently sitting on the floor building something out of Legos. He was lost in his own little world and would growl whenever anyone got too close.

"I blame you for that," Sonic said angrily shooting his friend a concerned look. "He was perfectly fine before we started doing your stupid story!"

I shrugged.

'Well that happens. Have you seen today's movie stars? They're all insane! It was only a matter of time before it started happening in fanfiction.'

Sonic and Espio looked at me in exasperation before walking over to the corner for their time out.

'Tails!' I shouted. 'Get ready. You're going to play Rumplestiltskin! Rouge you're the helpless bimbo. Shadow you're the helpless bimbo's lying father, and Knuckles gets to be the stupid king.'

"That was offensive on so many levels," Rouge said rolling her eyes. "What kind of clothes does a helpless bimbo wear?"

I gave her a once over.

'What you're wearing should do nicely,' I commented offhandedly.

Rouge's face turned red and her eyes flashed dangerously.

"Excuse me?" she yelled. "This is not the outfit of a helpless bimbo."

"Yeah," Knuckles agreed. "That's the outfit of a bimbo who can kick butt."

Rouge stared at Knuckles in dead silence for a few seconds;

*5 minutes later*

Knuckles lay unconscious on the floor, a huge knot on his head. Rouge wore a new gown that looked very much like something a helpless bimbo would wear, and I had to promote Vector to the stupid king.

'Okay people, get onstage and let's begin,' I announced sitting down. 'Action!'

"We don't know what to do," Vector complained standing awkwardly on the stage with his cast mates.

I sighed in annoyance and walked onto the stage. I carefully pulled Vector and Tails off the stage and motioned for Rouge and Shadow to begin their acting.

'Once upon a time there was a girl who lived with her father. The girl was sixteen years old and unmarried, which was apparently a big deal back then. They were poor, and the dad was a compulsive liar who wanted to be rich. Then this happened.'

Rouge and Shadow exchanged startled glances before beginning their performances.

"You should be married, and also you should give me money," Shadow said in a deadpan voice.

Rouge scowled.

"You're a lying jerk and I wish to live elsewhere," Rouge said evenly glaring at the black hedgehog.

Suddenly Vector was mysteriously shoved onto the stage.

"Hey!" he called back giving a death glare.

"I think I can solve both of our problems," Shadow said simply. He walked over to Vector and pulled him towards Rouge. "My daughter here can turn straw into gold or something awesome like that. Marry her and let your father-in-law move into the castle."

Vector rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

"That sounds amazing and totally real strange man I've never met before," he said shaking Shadow's hand. "You've got yourself a deal."

Shadow quickly moved Vector's hand to hold Rouge's and all but ran off the stage.

Rouge and Vector stared at the floor, unsure of what to do next.

'Here,' I said. 'Just let me set the stage for the next scene, and then you guys can finish the play.'

I grabbed a hammer and some nails and walked onto the stage.

*15 minutes later*

The stage was set perfectly. There was a pile of straw and an old fashioned spinning wheel sat in the corner.

'Perfect,' I said stepping back to admire my work.

"What was the hammer and nails for?" Vector asked.

'To punish anybody who questioned my artistic skills,' I snapped waving the hammer around threateningly.

"That's wonderful dear. The stage looks beautiful. No need to use that nasty hammer," Rouge cooed trying her best to be soothing. "We're just going to do the rest of the play now."

I nodded slowly, eyeing her warily while she made some hand gestures to Vector.

"So you spin this hay into gold and I will make you my queen. If you don't, you'll be beheaded," Vector declared.

Rouge batted her eyelashes at him.

"I'm sorry your highness, I only turn stray into gold," she said with a hint of sarcasm.

"Deal with it!" Vector shouted before storming dramatically off the stage.

Rouge shrugged before dropping to her knees and letting out an unconvincing sob.

"Oh woe is me!" she sobbed. "I am but a poor helpless bimbo who cannot turn this hay into gold. What's a girl to do?" She threw her hands up in the air and fell to the floor in a dramatic heap.

Tails entered onto the stage then.

"Hi lady," he said kindly. "I was listening in on your conversation and I think I can help you because I have magic skills."

Rouge looked at him strangely.

"How did you get down here?" she asked in amazement.

"Oh I've been stuck down here for three years," Tails said simply. "I like it. The darkness reminds me of my mother."

Rouge looked at him strangely.

"Well isn't that interesting," she said lamely. "Now what was that you said about helping me?"

Tails nodded.

"I am a magic person. I can spin this hay into stray so you can turn it into gold," he said happily.

"I actually can't do that either," Rouge confessed. "Can't you just do all the work?"

Tails nodded again.

"Alright," he agreed. "But you have to give me your first born child."

"What do you want with my first born child?" Rouge asked.

"My mom wants grandchildren," Tails explained. "And this seemed a lot easier than going out into the world and meeting a girl."

Rouge stared blankly at the small two-tailed fox for a bit.

"Sweetie we really need to get you in therapy. That box really messed with your head," Rouge said sadly. "Anyway that all sounds fantastic. Get to work."

'Tails quickly set to work spinning the hay, and come morning, the job was done,' I narrated. "The king was overjoyed and took Rouge to be his wife. Then the appropriate amount of time later, Rouge had a beautiful baby boy. Later that day, the mysterious stranger who had helped Rouge appeared.'

Charmy had been dressed in a bonnet and was currently being held by Rouge. He looked rather cross, but it's not like we had any another options. Nobody else would have looked funny enough dressed in a bonnet.

"I'm here for the baby" Tails said walking towards Rouge.

Rouge clutched Charmy close to her chest, slightly suffocating him though that may have been because the tape made it kind of hard to breathe.

"Oh please don't take my baby," she begged. "I love him so much. Isn't there anything else I can do? Aren't we friends?"

Tails looked at her thoughtfully.

"Fine, if you can tell me my name, you can keep your baby," he compromised.

Rouge stared at him blankly.

"You don't know my name do you?" Tails asked annoyed. "You stupid jerk! I spend an entire night spinning gold for you, and you didn't even bother learning my name? I told you like eight times! You know what? Forget you and your baby! I don't care anymore!"

With that, Tails stormed off the stage and ran out the room.

"Does this mean the play's over?" Rouge asked hopefully and Charmy mumbled in agreement.

I stared after Tails sadly.

'I guess that's a wrap. Man we really have to get that kid some therapy.'