Author's note:
Greetings! I'm back, yet again! So, this chapter was slightly longer than my usual 10,000 words (you just realized how flipping LONG my chapters are, didn't you?). But with an extra two thousand words (*Gasp*). I'm sorry (really am) but I just like writing a lot and pacing myself. Is that bad? When does it end? Okay, I know I didn't post in like, what, more than a week at least, right (No sense of dates here)…so err I hope you enjoy this chapter which endured extreme moments of procrastination. What else…what else…Oh! Thank you all for reading and of course, for the reviews. They really did put a bright smile on my face. So, continue being awesome, my friend.
Tuesday, November 15th, 2022, afternoon at Transfiguration; minutes away from completely destroying the Weasley family.
When a certain human being feels the hands of a clock slowly move by every second, every minute, every hour; it is quite inevitable for there to not be any cold chills through the spine or that knot in the stomach for they know they can stop and wait for time but time would not wait for them.
And since I am very, very unfortunate of a person, indeed, due to my extreme failure in life and also my ever-so-stalking-Rose karma; obviously time wouldn't wait even a single millisecond for me. Actually, it would bloody laugh in my face when Professor Doris walks up to me with that sticky figure, suspicious smirk, and those all-knowing wide green eyes. For when her hand would extend towards my table; the end of Rose Weasley's life would begin.
I would first be given detention.
Then, Mum would find out that her supposedly 'behavior friendly' daughter has ended up in detention; she would blame Dad for not keeping a close eye on me during the past summer holidays when Mum was traveling in Egypt for some really important work for the Ministry or something of the sort.
Then, Dad would say he's just about had it with Mum and would leave the house and most probably never, ever come back. Living a life full of crime and alcohol; cursing his flipping insane family.
Mum would be all alone at the house most of the times; and as lonely she would get, she'd start hanging out with those 'we're-old-but-let's-still-party-our-arses-off' people even though she definitely would hate them in the beginning but as lonely as losing Dad would be, she would, indeed, fall that low.
Then, Hugo would try to murder me because of the stage Mum had fallen to since he is her favorite child and what not, causing a fourteen-year old boy to end up in Azkaban, probably breaking some sort of record for the youngest criminal ever.
His, most likely failed attempt in murdering me (it is after all githead Hugo) would attract Uncle Harry and Aunt Ginny, who would step up to taking care of almost orphan Rose since her Mum had completely lost all rationality.
Then, Uncle Harry; trying to bail Hugo out of jail would end up somewhat battling a dementor since they wouldn't spare Hugo, and get his soul sucked out, eventually.
Aunt Ginny, upon the death of her beloved husband; would join Mum in her party predicament and also live a life of alcohol and clubs.
Uncle George, Percy, Bill, and Charlie would find out about the mess Aunt Ginny has been brought to and would blame Mum for supposedly luring her in. Then, they would all be against Mum and before you know it; Mum would be killed by one of our revenge-seeking Uncles who, escaping life in Azkaban; would be regretting murdering Mum for the rest of his life, driving him more insane than his Weasley name already makes him.
Then, it'd be only orphan Rose left who is obviously so ordinary and not special at all, that she'd be filed for adoption by one of the Uncles or Aunts; left in an orphanage where they would treat her terribly. And that's where she'd live all her life, since no one in their bloody right mind would adopt a psychopath, leaving a completely insane Rose who would eventually die alone in the orphanage without anyone giving two honey badgers about her.
Merlin; I really should've checked twice in my rucksack for that bloody essay before walking to this flipping all-hating-Rose class.
Tuesday, November 15th, 2022, Afternoon at Transfiguration, two minutes later, melting with gratitude for awesome best friend.
"Have I ever mentioned how much I love you?" I glanced up at her, "You saved a chain of destruction in my family" her hand extended towards my table, with the world's most valuable item in Rose Weasley's ever so worthless life; the really crap written Transfiguration essay. Well, you can't blame me; I'm not particularly good at Transfiguration….err…not that good…perhaps a little bad…err…
Merlin, who am I bloody kidding?!
When it comes to Transfiguration; I'm as good as a tree learning how to flipping walk, okay?!
That bad.
No wonder why Professor Doris completely hates me; I'm totally flunking this class. Well, also because I had landed one of the worst first impressions in the History of first impressions back in first-year; but it was mostly because, like I am a completely useless human being; I'm obviously a useless student.
"Hmm…you could say it more often" she responded, her short chestnut straight hair, reaching the tip of her neck. As her close set hazel eyes looked down at me, her wide grin comforted me a little and I smiled back. "So…what reward is your knight in shining armor receiving for today?" she asked.
"Perhaps, a seat next to me or maybe a pat on the back. It's quite tricky, isn't it? You decide, mate o' mine" I answered.
"Yep; the hardest decision in my life" she dropped down on the bench I was on as she reached for her rucksack, placing her Transfiguration textbook and a parchment roll. "You know, it'd be nice if you could stop sleeping in" she continued placing a quill on the table.
"Oh come on…I do not sleep in" I retorted.
"Hmm…so that's why you arrived two minutes before the bell rang?" she challenged.
"Err…I…ugh" I sighed. "Fine, I sleep in". I was in absolutely no mood to argue today (Probably because of the horror of losing my essay). There was no way in hell that I'm defending myself in another episode of let's-all-bash-out-on-Rose's-failure. Laura nodded her head in triumph and Professor Doris entered the classroom which was surrounded by high windows and was quite spacious, at that.
"I suppose, everybody has finished their essays on the process of transfiguring a Dinner plate to a mushroom" she cleared her throat as she walked towards her desk in the front of the classroom and rested a hand on its wood. There were murmurs in agreement across the classroom and she nodded her head. "You had quite a while to do it, didn't you? Well, you may turn in your assignment at the end of class, as always. Any unfinished essays would be given a T on it and would also receive detention. If there are any doubts or questions related to that, they shall be asked also during the end of class. Is that understood?" she completed and began writing on the chalkboard.
Gemino Curse; Doubling Charm
"This….is our new topic" she turned around from the chalkboard and glanced at us. "It is best if you understand the steps for Dinner Plate to Mushroom completely before being comfortable with new topics as the difficulty increases by every topic. Since, your O.W.L.S. are coming up this year, it is extremely important for the comprehension of the current topic in order to fully move on to the next one." She explained.
What's with all the teacher's obsessing over O.W.L.S.? I mean, sure they're coming up and it is best if we're prepared, but Merlin is it absolutely necessary for it to be mentioned every class on every day? I'm going to fail the O.W.L.S. for Transfiguration, anyway. I mean bloody hell; forget flipping full comprehension of a topic before moving on to the next one; I don't even know what I don't know in a topic…and it's only the beginning of the year: wait till the rest of the year.
I mean, it's bloody impossible; Transfiguration, I tell you. And I don't even know how Laura's so good at it when she's flunking Charms. Since, come on; Charms is way, way easier than IMPOSSIBLE Transfiguration.
And don't even get me started on Mudfloy, okay? HOW IN THE NAME OF BLOODY MERLIN is he so good at Transfiguration?! And as annoying as having him in my Transfiguration class since FIRST year (Yep, karma…karma everywhere) is, he also happens to be Professor Doris' favorite student.
Like, what even?
I mean…err…perhaps he may be…slightly smart and what not….but…
Ugh.
He's bloody perfect when it comes down to it, really.
Seeker of quidditch team, genius in academics…I mean what kind of perfection has he not achieved yet?!
Not that I care, really.
Since he's an arrogant, pathetic PRAT in my opinion.
"And for exactly these purposes" she paused and stared directly at me (Oh bloody hell) in the third row. "I'd be separating the students who I consider need extra help, in other words; tutoring, from the students who have higher than below average" my face flushed. Literally just flushed at that moment.
Is it bad that I want to just flipping dive into the black lake now?
Good.
Because, as big of a failure Rose Weasley really is; she can't swim.
Ha.
Yep…and then the Giant Squid over there can consume my drowned remains, for all I care.
Since, it is pretty obvious that I'm going to officially fail the O.W.L.S. for Transfiguration. And whoever disagrees is ten times more insane than I am. Okay? I'm not being the extreme psychopath I surely am and completely being honest here. None of my bits of insanity are influencing this statement; I swear. I mean, I know some of you are saying:
Wow, you could at least try before giving up on Transfiguration. It's not that flipping hard.
Ha.
I've been bloody trying since flipping first year, but apparently it just doesn't pass through my head which has only a couple of usable neurons left; so you can't really blame me. Really, it'd be quite nice if-
"Psst…psst…Rose…Rose..." an arm nudged me by my side; I glanced at Laura who nodded towards Professor Doris.
She began, walking down the narrow lane between my desk and another's.
Oh crap.
Oh crap.
Oh. Bloody. Crap.
"Do you find it fun to not pay attention?" she asked, arms crossed before her legs were practically touching my desk's edge.
Oh shit.
Oh double bloody shit.
WHAT DO I DO?!
"Err…no, Professor" I replied the obvious answer.
"I sure hope so" she sighed, "And I suppose you also do not know the answer for what the basis of the first step for the doubling charm is?" I shook my head guiltily and deciding to dismiss another Let's-all-bash-on-Rose episode, she headed back to the front of the classroom and began the lesson on Ganemo. What was it again? Let's look at the board…oh…Gimeno. Ha ha…ahem ahem…yeah…
I think we all bloodyknow that I'm so going to fail that O.W.L.S. exam. There isn't even another option to that; it's bloody obvious.
I can't even spell out the topic we're studying now; let alone bloody 'fully comprehend' it.
Soon enough, the bell rang and it was time for lunch.
I got up and started packing up my rucksack, stuffing my textbook and quill and what not inside it before I could hear Professor Doris, reminding us to hand in our essays to her on her desk. I grabbed my essay and was about to walk there, before I noticed Laura staring off in space, still seated when around half the class was already gone.
"Laura?" I asked.
"Huh? Huh? What? Err…I…" she finally snapped out of it and glanced up, "Err…Rose…Is it okay if I err…do…certain things before…joining you at the Gryffindor Table?"
"And what are these certain things, Laura?" I knew exactly what certain things meant. She turned a vivid shade of red and I nodded my head. Yep. I was so flipping right. The all observant (NOT oblivious) Rose makes the perfect observations, doesn't she? I know, I know; hold the applause. No seriously, you can stop clapping now.
"Err…well…I…Hey stop looking at me like that with that creepy look! You know what this is bloody about!" she began.
"Me? Creepy look? What utter load of nonsense?! So…are you going to ask him out?!" I asked, silently clapping. As soon as the mention of 'asking out', Laura choked on her own spit, causing a coughing fit before she could shoot up from the bench, hanging her rucksack along her shoulder.
"I am not…asking….out…" she almost said like a lost puppy. "But…aren't…" She cleared her throat. "Do you find it weird…I mean…aren't blokes supposed to be the ones asking a girl out?"
I sighed and dangled my arm around her shoulder. "You'll be fine…I promise" I gave her my widest grin and she became even more red than she already was.
"Do you think so?" she asked with cute puppy dog eyes.
"Yes, yes… Now can we please hand in her essays and just bloody go to lunch already? I'm starved" I said.
"Probably because you skipped breakfast, since you slept in" she said, as we both put our essays on Professor Doris' desk and exited the classroom, walking down the corridor of the ground floor and before we knew it; the entrance hall was right there.
After a short while, we stood against the other half of the door of the Great Hall, side by side, watching a storm of students rush in through the open door adjacent to us.
"This is it." She said, peeking over at the Hufflepuff table as she took a long deep breath. "There he is" she completed. I followed her gaze and poked my head into the other door, only to notice the messy light brown hair and green-eyes…ugh…he was one of those "pretty boys", wasn't he?. In other words, he was confused as a flipping cross-dressing girl. At least I thought so. Definitely not my type. But every girl has their own type, so I guess if Laura did indeed see something in him; then I'm fine with it. As long as she's happy, then I'm happy.
Wow.
That sounded so bloody cheesy.
Since when did I become so cheesy?
Oh God…something should be done about this…no seriously, it is bloody urgent.
I'm lifeless, non-affectionate, useless Rose. I am absolutely not the cheesy sort of person, okay? This is quite a shocker for the day.
Laura stiffened up before walking all confidently to the Hufflepuff table.
"Good luck!" I called from behind and she continued walking, giving me a quick thumbs up. Ah…wasn't she completely, absolutely, definitely flipping adorable?! I mean, it isn't everyday that your best friend falls in love, you know? Where's my bloody camera?
And that's another good thing about Laura.
She's muggle born!
Do you know how much I love Muggles and every bloody thing about them?!
Yeah, just thought you should flipping know.
Well, now Laura's shifted more to the wizard style and has already forgot more or less of the muggle ways but when I first met her…oh…I flipping fell in love with that girl. I knew that no matter what, we were going to be best friends for flipping life. If not, then I'd spend my entire life trying to be friends with such awesomeness of genes.
I remember how we met very, very clearly:
Rose: (whistling) Ah…nothing better to do today! Walks down the corridor of the third floor, heading towards dinner downstairs, when she hears-
Okay this isn't flipping working for me. I know I'm a completely horrible writer, but there has to be some other way to tell the story slightly better than I ever so did a crap job in.
Ah…Okay…
So, during first year; I practically only hanged out with only James, Fred, and gorgeous Dominique who told me stories about Victorie and Teddy and their adventures at their house. Of course at the time, I was completely in love with the brilliantness Teddy Lupin was (and still flipping is, to be honest) but I've gotten over that….I think…I mean Victorie and him are bloody engaged! There is no way in hell that a fifteen year old could all dramatically and completely non-realistically break a bloody engagement!
Wait a second…
Did I just flipping think of breaking their engagement?!
No…I did not…
I absolutely did not.
I do not, no way on the flipping planet, still fancy Teddy Lupin! I know I don't!
Where was I again?
Ah yes…so I didn't have many friends since all Al and I talked about was quidditch (which Rose ever so clearly knows nothing about) and other awkward topics like the flipping weather or something. Since, he already had Slytherin mates of his own (specifically Mudfloy and Douche Daniel)…so I was basically all alone in a corner when it came to Al most of the times.
So, I was walking down the corridors amongst the crowd of students at the fourth floor, heading towards dinner down at the Great Hall, all miserably since I had just given another row of thinking about Al and Slytherin, when I heard a squeal from the unicorn tapestry behind me.
My body froze as I listened carefully to the voices behind me and while I listened, I heard muffled sobs and laughter as followed by another party.
And as fast as I could, I spun around and embraced the unicorn tapestry in front by pulling it back as fast as I could, only to notice a chestnut long haired girl who covered her face with her hands and sobbed miserably against a brick wall in the doorway, facing a bloke who stood with his back towards me.
"What's going on in here?" I managed. Then, the bloke turned around and I saw a familiar face, indeed…
Why wasn't it Daniel the Slytherin arrogant prat?! He stood there with a wide smirk labeled on his face as he crossed his arms. The girl lowered down her hands only to show me red rimmed puffy eyes which released tears running down her bright red cheeks.
I instantly felt a rush of rage inside me as I narrowed my eyes at prick Daniel who still stood there with that smug stupid expression on his face and at that moment I just wanted to drag him to volcano and boil him in lava, you know. And it didn't matter if the girl had fault in it or anything…Dad told me that blokes should never, ever make a girl cry.
And even though that was extremely cheesy, I agreed with it enough times to make it Rose Weasley's official motto, okay? Something like:
Beware: If you make a girl cry, gender being male; then you know what awaits you: Incredible Hulk Anger which even Merlin would beg on his knees to be spared from.
Yep.
It was perfect.
My motto, that is.
"Please tell me that you're not the one responsible for this" I pointed at the girl while glaring at prick Daniel.
"Oh…and what if I was?" was his spiteful response.
"You…dare…MAKE A GIRL CRY?!" I roared and even prick Daniel was shaken by it. The girl was staring at me in awe and her tears had stopped dropping down her cheeks and her sniffs had slowed down a little too.
"That's quite enough, Dan" a familiar voice announced from behind me, a silence broke as followed by slow footsteps. I turned around…only to notice my Worst. Flipping. Nightmare.
His platinum blonde hair had become slightly messy as one hand ran through it, navy blue eyes…and yet another smug smirk on a face.
Glory!
It was as if I hadn't seen enough arrogant prats today that my karma had decided to flipping make it up, geez thanks karma.
Rose is eternally grateful for you never leaving her bloody side, no seriously; thanks.
"Oh well, look who it is!" his fake enthusiasm truly disgusted me. "Why don't you head downstairs for dinner, okay? Oh and be careful to not go tripping any stairs, alright?" Ugh. I WANTED TO KILL HIM…HE WAS SO BLOODY ANNOYING AND-
Calm down, woman. That's exactly what pricks like him want, anyway. If I let him get to me, then I'd be proving that his bloody little words actually affect me. Well, they don't, not in the slightest. Stupid Mudfloy…oh and for further reference; this time, I hadn't forgotten his flipping little name.
I turned around before my body could bloody catch on fire in the wrath that even staring at his stupid little head provided and dashed towards the girl, grabbing her wrist as I raced towards the tapestry where I had come from.
Before I could push it back to return to the corridors, I shot a quick glance(more like glare) at Mudfloy and managed a "As long as you can learn to keep your nose from sniffing in other people's bloody business!"
I know.
I really do know.
It wasn't the best comeback I have had in the many suave comments I have made; but hey…at least I had stopped myself from snapping his bloody neck.
For a psychopath like me, that was quite the accomplishment, lowering down my killing urge, that is.
I pushed aside the tapestry and flipping dragged the girl down with me back to the corridor. Well, maybe not drag…I mean, she was kind of running on her own while I just held her wrist.
So…at least I wasn't forcing her to leave.
Yep.
I have a little something called human decency; so what? Why is everyone so bloody surprised? Oh yeah…psychopaths don't have human decency…I see why. Hmph. Not much of a surprise then.
And the rest is history.
It doesn't take a genius to know that the girl was Laura, really.
She later on told me that the Daniel bloke had cornered her and called her a name that shall not be written, ever, ever in a diary; let alone be flipping thought of. For it is seriously that bad. I mean, my-ears-are-bloody-bleeding, sort of deal.
But if it is a must to clarify things, then…oh well…he called her a mu-mud-b-b-blood…
Do you know how long that bloody took to write?! I was flipping trembling while I was at it!
Ah…the things Rose Weasley does for her diary, indeed.
After that, I told Laura that if the bloke ever comes near her again, I was going to grind him into flipping smithereens; and looking quite convinced she smiled and we became best mates. Quite wonderful, isn't it? How I always dreamt of having a muggle born best friend and then, right then and there; popped a muggle born girl who just so happened to be the smartest, kindest, and just simply most awesome human being on the bloody planet.
It is indeed quite incredible how I defy the laws of karma sometimes, isn't it?
I am quite an exemplary role model for those whose karma doesn't stop chasing after them…but of course, as always, only Rose Weasley has as strong of a case of karma and if I ever find someone who-
"You're in the way!" I heard behind me.
No I wasn't…I was standing against the shut half of the large wooden door; the other half was wide open without a single thing in the way.
Ugh.
Fine, I'll move.
Anyway, who…
Well, look who it is!
"Hiya Rox!" I turned around and gave her a wide grin.
"Whatever" she rolled her eyes and walked right past me inside the Great Hall with her group of friends coming right behind her.
Whoa, that was not the response I was expecting from always-so-sweet Roxanne.
Oh, I see…she was going through her; I-hate-the-world-so-leave-me-the-hell-alone phase, hmmm…I think Hugo was going through that too, wasn't he? Well, I don't really mind. They were third years anyway, so I seriously did not give a honey badger; they'd snap out of it soon enough. Roxanne and Hugo, that is.
Ah…well, let's see if Laura accomplished her asking out deeds with that Pretty Boy Mathew. I entered the hall, watching the Hufflepuff table before sitting on my usual place, as I placed my hand on the space beside me. It was reserved for Laura, okay? That's what best mates do for each other. Nothing special or cheesy, alright? I am not cheesy…I know I'm not!
Laura was still sitting beside the Mathew bloke as it appeared she was talking to him, and he was actually responding quite enthusiastically. Ah…I think that for today, perhaps, Laura really should just stay with Pretty Boy, he seems to be enjoying her company.
Wait a second…am I being jealous?!
No way in hell…I mean, then Laura's going to seriously get mad at me if I don't accept the fact that she has a love life unlike some people over here…
"Oi, Rose!" Hmm…who?
Ah, why isn't it James?! He stood beside me and pointed towards my hand on the empty space and arched an eyebrow. I shrugged and put it away from the empty space as he sat down.
"Where's Laura?" he questioned right after.
"Hmm…quite worried, aren't we now?" I teased while nudging him on the elbow.
"Oh bugger off" was his immediate response.
"Speaking of buggering off, where's Fred?" I asked, staring at the spot right across me where a frequently sitting prat happened to be missing. James laughed a little and answered it off with a mere shrug while slicing his omelet with his knife.
"Knowing him, he's probably…" James began before we heard it.
A loud shriek echoed through the Great Hall and the chattering noise on the tables broke into instant stillness; not one person moved. I glanced up only to find a Professor Maria of Music hopping up and down, wiggling her entire body, shaking her arms, doing some sort of bloody insane dance on the High Table above our heads.
But it wasn't a dance.
Neither was it some sort of call for a mental institution.
It was a newt.
And it was inside her grey jumper.
Ugh.
Well at least we know where Fred is now.
Probably hiding his arse off somewhere, planning some sort of other practical joke.
Seriously…does that boy ever flipping learn?!
Thursday, November 16th, 2022, Morning at Breakfast in Great Hall
Well, yesterday was quite the busy day; I did my Potions essay for three flipping hours in the library and Laura skipped a bloody class (You don't understand, she never skips classes) and also sat at the Hufflepuff table during all meals! And neither is she with me right now! Like what the flipping hell?! Does asking someone out really take that bloody long?!
I mean…she can't just not utter a single word to me the entire day, including at the dormitory where all she did was her unfinished Potions essay! And even when I said "Hi", all she did was say "Hi, I really need to do work; so can't talk right now" and I know what you all are thinking: she technically did speak to me then, but saying nothing but 'Hi' and 'leave me the hell alone for now' is not what I consider such an awesome conversation, thank you.
Hmph.
Besides that, she also asked me to take notes for the class she just so happened to miss yesterday and now I have to copy mine since I was in absolutely no mood during yesterday's Defense against the Dark Arts class to care in the slightest(you can't blame me; I'm always in the worst of flipping moods)
Now here we are:
An iguana is lizard specie with a green scaly skin tone; it is involved with dark magic and holds the abilities to blah blah…I'm really tired, let's not do this right now, shall we?
Thursday, November 16th, 2022, Later during Defense against the Dark arts
There she is, just sitting right there, two seats before me all casually as if she doesn't owe anybody an explanation!
Ugh.
Wait…I know what to do! I need some parchment!
Rose: Where did you get an invisibility cloak, Laura?
Laura: What?
Rose: You've recently disappeared, that's what!
Laura: Oh, I was just talking to Mathew…who spat in your coffee?
Rose: You could've at least talked to me! You didn't say a single word to me, yesterday!
Laura: Well, I just got a new boy friend, so you can't really blame me!
Rose: Wait, what? You're going out?!
Laura: What else did you think, Captain Clueless?
Rose: I just thought the whole asking out deal was taking far too long…
Laura: What kind of asking out takes almost two days?
Rose: I don't know the 'aren't-boys-supposed-to-be-the-ones-asking-the-gi rl-out' kind.
Laura: Ha, Very funny, Rose.
Rose: I know I should just become a bloody comedian already, shouldn't I? I'm seriously giving it a thought…
Laura: While you make your jokes, I think I'll stick to becoming a herbologist.
Rose: While you think I'd be a comedian; I'd underhandedly become an auror. Muahahaha, you shall never find out.
Laura: Yeah…you sure like aurors, not much of a surprise, really.
Rose: Am I that transparent?
Laura: Perhaps.
Rose: Laura, you won't believe this.
Laura: What?
Rose: Henry, sitting right beside me, is bloody drooling while looking at you.
Laura: Ugh. That's disgusting, Rose. Don't bloody lie.
Rose: Hey…what would Henry think? Calling him disgusting…Tsk Tsk. I thought you were better than that.
Laura: Than what?
Rose: Than being Laura the dream crusher.
Laura: Ha ha…really funny.
Rose: No seriously, you should be proud that a bloke is bloody drooling over you. The only attention I attract between blokes is 'Hey Rose, can you give me the answer for number three on the Charms assignment?'
Laura: You can't blame them; you're a flipping genius when it comes to Charms.
Rose: Laura, have I passed my insanity down to you?
Laura: No, you most certainly have not.
Rose: Good because the last thing on earth which could possibly define me is 'genius'.
Laura: Are you serious? Oh Merlin. You have issues.
Rose: Why, of course I'm serious. Why the hell wouldn't I? And what do you mean; 'issues'? What're you getting at Laura Brecht?
Laura: It just boggles my mind how you think you're not a genius…and what the hell is ' the only bloke attention I receive is for homework answers' supposed to mean?! Have you even seen the look on blokes' faces when you walk past them?!
Rose: What do you mean? A look of horror?! Am I that non-attractive?! Oh Merlin…
Laura: Ugh. Nothing, forget it.
Rose: Hey, by the way; don't we have this class with the Hufflepuffs?
Laura: Err…yeah…Where have you been for the past few months? The schedule was given a long, long time ago.
Rose: Fantasizing over my future husband and father of all four of my children.
Laura: He's not even in this class.
Rose: But I have two classes with him; I think that's quite enough to get Rose Weasley distracted for the rest of her life, don't you think?
Laura: Distracted?
Rose: Why of course, Mrs. Ryan Williams has every right to dream about the theme of her wedding! Perhaps a wedding dress, too…I need to figure that out too. Ah…so many things I need to figure out.
Laura: I don't like that bloke all too much.
Rose: ARE YOU BLOODY KIDDING ME?!
Laura: Well…if it makes you feel better; I am.
Rose: Of course, it doesn't make me feel better! We can't have the bridesmaid hating the groom, now can we?
Laura: I don't hate, Williams…he's just…not my type.
Rose: This feels so Déjà vu, you have no bloody idea.
Laura: Déjà vu? Why?
Rose: I feel the same bloody way about Pretty Boy Matthew.
Laura: Already giving him nick names? I see.
Rose: Well, you can't really blame me!
Laura: Oh really…?
Rose: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Laura: No…what?
Rose: …look at the front of the classroom.
Laura: Professor Travis did not just abandon us.
Rose:I think he said he needed to handle some 'important business' or something. So, now then...are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Laura: Well, of course…let's finish what we started last class.
Rose: Now we're on the right page…
Rose Weasley and Laura Brecht's
List of most wanted blokes at Hogwarts
Status: (Complete)
1)Ryan Williams: Not only does he have the best bloody blue eyes and the hottest hair on the entire flipping planet; he just so happens to be Mr. Smarty Pants along with it, and I think his house name can be proof enough. He seriously has it all.
Commentary area
Laura: I think he has the looks but he's not all that brilliant as you imagine him to be.
Rose: You're just far too jealous of our perfect relationship.
Laura: Relationship? You're not even on Base 1 yet.
Rose: Bugger off, we're totally meant for each other.
Laura: Uh huh….
2)Matthew Smith: His brilliant looks are proof enough for any girl to fall madly in love with him. Other than this fact (Bugger off Rose) (What? I just don't find the bloke all that attractive) (Comments are to be made in the commentary area, ahem ahem) Now where was I? Other than this fact, he also happens to have the sexiest body; his Hufflepuff quidditch captain title is evidence enough.
Commentary area
Laura: Now, before you write anything down; Rose…I'm warning you, I didn't go all too far with Williams so you better not hate on my Mr. Bloody Perfect.
Rose: Why would I hate on him? He's fine really, but not just…Mr. Bloody Perfect in my head.
Laura: Why not?
Rose: Because I have my own Mr. Bloody Perfect!
Laura: Truth.
3) Albus Potter: He happens to have the most incredible pair of green eyes in the entire flipping galaxy and have you seen his flipping hair: GORGEOUS. Enough said.
Commentary area
Rose: You did NOT just write down the name of my cousin.
Laura: I think I just did.
Rose: But, but…he's my cousin! You can't just write his name there! Do you have any idea how flipping awkward this is for me?!
Laura: Well, it might be awkward for you; but Rose, the bloke has MAJOR points in the beauty area, if you ask me.
Rose: Oh my God…I didn't know you had such feelings for him…
NOTE TO INSANE IN NEED OF A THERAPIST: I DO NOT FANCY ALBUS POTTER.
NOTE TO GIRL IN DENIAL: I'll arrange something for you if you like, maybe a 'tutoring' lesson or something of the sort, eh?
NOTE TO INSANE IN NEED OF A THERAPIST: Arrange something? He doesn't even talk to you anymore.
4) Harold Patrick: The bloke may just only be in second year but I'm telling you when puberty strikes; he'd be ten times more attractive than anybody you've ever flipping seen. No flipping doubt in that.
Commentary area
Laura: I'm just going to ignore your child molesting interests, Rose.
Rose: You know he's got the looks and the personality. There's no questioning it.
Laura: Personality? Since when do you know him so well?
Rose: Might have heard a few things about him, ahem ahem by Lily the all observant cousin of mine. Oh and perhaps…Molly…
Laura: Molly? Wasn't she just an extremely shy Ravenclaw? When did she start talking about blokes?!
Rose: The world is full of dark secrets, Laura.
5) Daniel Purvis: He might have the coldest and rudest personality ever but we all know that the girls flipping swoon over him. Definitely has an amazing body, too.
Commentary area
Rose: I think you're in a desperate need for my therapist's home address, Laura. The bloke's been bullying you since FIRST flipping year.
Laura: I know, but…
Rose: No buts, he's just the kind of person who's NOT supposed to be on this list At. Flipping. All.
Laura: You've got to admit, though; he is attractive even though he's a-
Rose: Big douche? Agreed.
6) Scorpius Malfoy: The darkest pair of blue eyes can be quite mesmerizing when you look at him. Not to mention the brains and the professional beater skills he has on the Slytherin Quidditch team. He has it bloody all; he's almost perfect, if you ask me (and any other girl in her right mind)
Commentary area
Rose: You've GOT to be kidding me?! Mudfloy is on the flipping list? Quick! Hide! It's a sign of the apocalypse!
Laura: Ha ha, very funny.
Rose: No seriously, Laura…why the hell did you write flipping Malfoy's name on the list?! This has got to be some sort of prank or something. And we all know he's been with Barbie Lydia for almost centuries, now. There's no denying that. Besides the list is for WANTED blokes; if he's clearly already the bloody future father of all of Barbie Lydia's kids, that does take the attraction away from him, don't you think? Not that anyone in their right mind would be flipping attracted to MALFOY, anyway…Ha. Official joke of the day.
Laura: Everyone knows he broke it off with Lydia back in third year, you're just finding reasons to not have his name on the list. Actually, now that I think about it, he should be more at the top…
Well, if throwing parchments at each other back and forth by the two clearly very, very annoyed people who sat in between us, was, indeed, the only way to settle the Pretty Boy Matthew matter; then I guess it was a choice worth taking. Even if we did absolutely no work while Professor Travis had abandoned our class.
To-do list:
1. Hide all evidence of the Most Wanted Blokes List; There is no way in the name of flipping MERLIN that I'm letting anyone like bloody Mudfloy see his name is on it, since he's the last person on the bloody planet, to be considered the slight bit attractive. It's true. It's not my hate for him getting in the way, At. Flipping. All. Okay?! Ugh. Fine…he may be considered attractive…slightly…BUT I DON'T THINK SO. It's just other teenage hormonal girls…
2. Finish 5 essays ( LIKE WHY IN THE NAME OF MERLIN DO WE HAVE 5 ESSAYS IN ONE BLOODY DAY)…just boggles my mind.
Thursday, November 16th, 2022, very very late at Gryffindor Common room, Exhausted and as unlucky as I am, also have 5 essays to write. Bloody hell.
The Draught of peace is a potion that relieves agitation. It is considered extremely important in the Potions field of magic, and noted to be incredibly challenging to brew as it requires the need of a precise step by step of the procedures; as one tiny mistake can result to drastic consequences. For instance, adding slightly too much of a certain ingredient, can induce a deep, deep sleep for the consumer.
Ingredients:
1. Powdered moonstone
2. Syrup of Hellebore
3. Powdered porcupine quills
4. Powdered unicorn horn
The potion must be a turquoise green, once finished and must be simmered before consumed. If brewed correctly, it will produce a silver vapor and can be-
"Hiya, Rose!" I heard behind the armchair I was seated on. I turned around instantly only to notice the face of a cousin.
"Hey, Dom!" I answered over my shoulder. She strode to the armchair placed vertically beside me and quickly dropped down, sighing. She shut her eyes and took a deep breath before glancing at me and smiling vividly.
The crackle of the fireplace on my right was quite relaxing as its glow shone over us two. I put down the quill and my parchment roll on the table in front. "So..." I began, not knowing what to say.
"Doing an essay, I see?" Dom asked.
"Yeah…15 minutes before curfew too. I'm seriously questioning the amount of essays I'm getting recently." I complained tiredly.
She laughed and shrugged. "They're preparing you for O.W.L.S."
"But wouldn't it be nice if people who're likely to fail, anyway, not be reminded of it at least a billion times a day?"
"Fail?"
"Why, of course. I am Rose Weasley after all"
"Exactly. You are Rose flipping Weasley, how in the name of Merlin would someone as perfect as you come even as close to the word 'fail'?"
"Ha. Perfect? Hardly" And before Dom got a chance to respond, I felt a hand grasp my shoulder. I looked over my shoulder and saw yet…another cousin.
What's with all my cousins bloody lining up over here, can't a woman finish her Potions essay in peace?! And I have two more to do, like bloody hell…and you know what? I think it doesn't take a genius to know that in less than 15 minutes, two essays (including flipping Transfiguration…we all know how well that would work out) cannot possibly be finished.
"Dom, Louis said your Mum sent a letter down at the owlery…he said that you should check it out…it has some exciting news" Lucy said, with a I'm-clearly-acting-my-arse-off tone.
"Oh, I'll go check it out" she replied, getting up with the exact same tone and before I knew it, she had left the Common Room.
Oh Merlin…
It was as if they were speaking code like complete criminals. What even…
"What are you trying to hide?" I asked suspiciously as Lucy seated down at the same armchair Dom was on.
"Hide? Nothing…what's there to hide?" she said, staring down at her lap. I decided to forget the topic since I was in absolutely no mood to argue.
"So…how are you and Ben going?" I said.
"Ben? Oh we…broke up" she answered slowly.
"How come?"
"Well…let's just say I liked someone else…"
"…You cheated on him?!"
"No, I didn't…I mean, a little…I sort of…err…FINE. I DID." She blurted out. Well…it is Lucy we're talking about here, the bloke flipping attracting magnet so of course she could find someone else who'd willingly snog with her unlike yours truly over here, who still hasn't had her first kiss.
I know.
Don't bloody rub it my face.
What am I, a thirteen year old?! Ugh. I haven't even snogged someone yet. Like what the actual honey badger?
Not much of a surprise, though. Since I am insane, useless, and pretty much the most ordinary human being on the planet…so, I think being flipping fried alive would be, indeed, a better choice than snogging with Rose bloody Weasley.
But Lucy, on the other hand, it wasn't rare at all to see a thousand blokes lining up behind her.
Actually, I had witnessed it once during last year's Hogsmeade.
"Who was it?" I continued.
"Trevor. Trevor Hamilton."
"That fourth year bloke?"
"Yep."
"Somehow, I'm not surprised, Lucy"
"What? He's downright gorgeous!"
"Hmmm…Ben didn't deserve that…how cruel, tsk tsk"
"Oh, shut up."
Thursday, November 17th, 2022, Breakfast at Great Hall
Things to do
1. Find Charms textbook, I bloody know I had it today, okay? Oh bloody hell. Why do I keep flipping losing things? Laura's textbook once finished with taking necessary notes from it. Specifically: Silencing Charm. Since we have a very, very important test coming up…in let's say…about three hours. Yes. I know. I procrastinate. What of it? It's old news, to be honest.
2. Continue to be stalked by Karma.
3. Eat.
4. Breathe.
5. Sleep.
6. Quit procrastinating.
7.I don't even know.
Thursday, November 17th, 2022, Later outside Potions classroom, controlling my need to bloody cry.
"Wait, what?!"
"That's right. He ended up in Hospital Wing"
"Are you flipping serious…Potter...Albus Potter?"
"Heard a bludger struck him right in the head during Quidditch practice yesterday"
"No way…is he alright?! Oh Merlin…Oh God…"
"I don't know; think he got a concussion or something of the sort"
"CONCUSSION?!"
"Hey…I don't know much, why don't you go visit him later on, eh? Better than hearing rumors"
"Visit him? Erm…but…"
"You're his cousin, aren't you? Listen, I gotta leave, catch you later, eh, Rose?"
"Hey wait! We're not friends any-"and before I knew it, he had dashed away "…more" I finished miserably. I kicked the brick wall in front of me repeatedly and mumbled at least a billion swear words.
"Damn, crap, crap, crappety crap…shit. Shit, shit, shit, shit, Bloody hell. Damn. Damn. Damn. Da-"
"You don't smile at a five year old with that mouth, do you?!" I heard beside me.
WHO DARE INTERRUPT MY CUSSING PARADE?!
Oh…it's Laura.
"Hey" I said lifelessly.
"Well, you obviously woke up at the wrong side of the bed…What happened?" she asked.
"I see, you're in a good mood…oh right, you have a bloody boyfriend…I remember now, you have something called a life"
"Oh Merlin…what's gotten into you today?"
"My flipping cousin, that's what!"
"Erm, Rose…I'd love it if you were a little more specific than that"
"Oh right. I have a billion cousins, don't I? AL. ALBUS POTTER, ever heard of him? Sound familiar?!" I began kicking the wall before me again.
Why?!
Why does everything that can go wrong come rushing towards me?!
What did I ever do to God to deserve this?!
Perhaps existing…?
That's right, maybe I'm just such a useless human being, that all wrong should just stalk me since I ever so, clearly, deserve it!
Bloody hell.
No really; BLOODY. HELL.
What's that? Oh sure, karma…I see you there, right behind me as always! Well at least, I have you always by my bloody side! Ugh.
"Rose, did you get your period today or something…?" Laura asked quite sincerely after observing me, kick the brick wall.
"No. I certainly did not" I answered sternly, continuing my kicking predicament.
"What happened with Al, then? Did he say something he shouldn't have?" she guessed hesitantly.
"No. That was a long, long time, ago. What's the use with even saying something to me anymore? I'm sure he hates me"
"Hate you?"
"Well, he did happen to completely ignore me all through first year! And then, second year…he officially said it…more like announced it in front of everybody down at dinner…I'm pretty sure you were there the whole bloody time" I answered, annoyed.
"Oh…is it about the quidditch matter…?" she guessed again, patiently. I glanced up at her and stopped my kicking; I was almost ready to burst in tears. I never cry, I can't cry. I can't let something like this come in between and just ugh…I just won't cry at all costs.
If anything, Rose Weasley has a bloody heart of stone; she just doesn't cry or feel emotion. She's useless and completely lifeless, remember? So how on earth can she possibly cry?!
Her hand reached for the back of my head as she lowered it onto her shoulder, understanding me perfectly. And before I knew it, her comfortable shirt (nothing about me crying, it was her bloody comfortable shirt that caused that effect. I'm being perfectly honest here) was being stained by tiny drops of tears.
And for once, I didn't care if anyone was watching.
I just let it all out.
How could this happen to me?
I couldn't…
I just couldn't...deal with this right now.
Al…I needed to visit him.
We were best mates until…sigh. I really looked up to him, and it was almost as if my attempts in maintaining our best mate relation after he was sorted into Slytherin meant absolutely nothing to him. Like really; nothing. Simply nada.
But I'm over that now.
I'm sure I am.
It's been like, what…three years now?
Ugh.
Not that I care, really.
But, if he did indeed have a concussion, then…I should visit him, shouldn't I?
It's totally normal…even if we haven't talked in ages.
But, I absolutely need to know if he's okay. Would he mind? Would he yell at me? Would he be mad?
I don't know what to do.
I have the options of visiting him and further damaging our relationship or not visiting him at all and remaining at the stake of not knowing if he's got flipping amnesia or something.
Ugh.
Is it alright if I dive into the Black Lake already, yeah…thanks.
Stupid Karma. Stupid Karma. Stupid Karma.
Have I ever mentioned how much I hate my karma?
Probably.
My life is far too complicated, isn't it?
Ah to be in the life of Rose flipping Weasley…and don't tell me that I'm utterly impatient, if you had a life like mine, I'm sure you would've actually dived into the Black Lake. I'm being completely honest here.
Thursday, November 17th, 2022, Even later, during Potions class, the beginning of the chain of Weasley family destruction. Bloody flipping hell.
I sat myself down at a bench in the fourth row and completely ignored the person sitting next to me. I didn't complain that the teacher had been insane enough to put cat and dog on the same bloody bench or the fact that he was completely staring at me as if he had nothing better to do like the complete prat he was or that Laura was sitting in the first row, a million miles away from me.
No, I didn't complain at all.
Since all that was on my mind was how to deal with Albus Potter's concussion.
"And what's gotten into your eyes this fine evening?" he asked mockingly. I know they're red. So what? I cry. I have a heart. Is it that big of a surprise?! Oh right…it is since I'm Rose flipping Weasley.
"Oh, just piss off, already" I answered instantly, staring at the blackboard in the front of the classroom while resting my chin on my hand.
"Quite straightforward today, are we?" he said, still staring at me with that smirk on his face. Ugh. I have no time for this right now. Can the psychopath next to me, please be taken to the asylum already? Yeah, I've been patiently requesting that since, what…FIRST BLOOODY YEAR?!
But since no one in their right mind ever listens to a certain Rose over here, I guess there's no helping it. My requests, that is.
"I am in no mood today, Malfoy" I answered strictly, still staring at the blackboard, trying to completely avoid his prickish ways.
"I see you're not calling me Mudfloy anymore…is there any special event, today, Weasley?" he asked, clearly, enjoying himself.
"Yes. Actually, there is!" I furrowed my eyes and spun around at the bench, only to completely glare at him with my Avada Kedavra eyes. "My cousin just so happens to have a flipping concussion! Does that count as a special bloody event?!" I know. I know. I sound like a woman on her period, so what? I was officially across the limits of pissed off, I think I have a right to sound bloody like that!
At the moment, I finished my sentence, his face flushed and his smirk transformed into pursed lips. Aha! Mission Get rid of Malfoy has been successful! I am quite brilliant sometimes, aren't I? Thank you, Thank you, I appreciate the applause.
"Where'd you hear about that?" he managed to say very, very critically, indeed, a while later, looking right into my eyes.
Wow, his eyes are really round and wide and-
Oh Merlin…
I did not just write that.
I absolutely did not.
Hmmm…Malfoy's eyes?
Oh, I have nothing to say about them.
"Err…I…heard about it from Gossip Gary" I answered. "That second year bloke in Hufflepu-"
"Yeah. I know him" he interrupted me, clearly, very annoyed.
"Hey, you're getting mad at me?! I should be mad at you for bugging me for the past flipping ten minutes during work time!" I raised my volume a little from the whispering thing we were doing (we were in class, after all). He remained quiet and sighed, turning around and faced the blackboard where Professor Helen stood while noting something down related to the assignment for next class.
"Aren't you going to say anything?!" I nudged him on the shoulder, still whispering. He completely ignored me.
Ugh.
"It was me..." he began, staring off into space. What was he on about now? Geez…Malfoy, I'd seriously love it if you could be a little more detailed than that. Ugh.
"What do you mean?" I whispered back.
"I'm the one who hit the bludger" he answered hesitantly.
"WHAT?!" my voice echoed through the whole classroom. All eyes turned to me but I didn't mind. I didn't mind at flipping all.
Since it all made so much bloody sense, now. Malfoy was a beater on the Slytherin Quidditch team, and Al just so happened to be chaser along with being Captain.
Of course, someone as big of a psychopath as Malfoy, would go on just hitting a bludger in someone's face from far away on flipping PURPOSE.
Ha. Why am I not, in the slight bit, surprised?!
It was, indeed, Mudfloy, I was dealing with here.
He was the one who started this entirely chaotic predicament with my: To visit or not to visit Al? He was the one responsible for me acting ten times more insane than I already was. It was him. It was all bloody him.
And this time, I wasn't going to boil him in my lava.
Or shoot Avada Kedavra's from bloody eyes.
Or toss him off a bridge.
No…I was just going to sit there, staring at him while he drowned in his own bloody guilt and you know what, I wasn't even-
"Ms. Weasley! Mr. Malfoy! Does it seem the slight bit funny for you two to talk in between my lessons…?" Professor Helen crossed her arms, glaring at us two. "I wasn't expecting such behavior from you both, especially you; Ms. Weasley" she gave a disappointed look at me. She didn't expect such behavior especially from me?!
Bloody hell.
Woman, you must be a million times more flipping insane than I was, really. How can you not expect behavior like that from a mad person such as Rose here?! Am I the only one who is seriously questioning Professor Helen's sanity right now?
I can't be. I seriously can't be.
"15 points off Gryffindor and Slytherin!" she noted down on a parchment roll which she grabbed from her desk and narrowed eyes at us both. "You'd also be given detention. Today, after your classes are completed: be ready at the Trophy room for some cleaning" and then the lesson continued while I frowned my arse off the whole bloody time.
Thanks Malfoy, no really; in addition to striking my cousin who probably hates me, in the head, causing a bloody concussion, you also managed to get us both in detention and in other words, start a chain of flipping destruction in the Weasley family.
Could my day get any worse?
Let me rephrase that; Could Malfoy get any worse?
Thursday, November 17th, 2022, Much later, Dinnertime but unfortunately (not much of a surprise) in the Trophy room, cleaning and cleaning and cleaning and you get the point, don't you?
"You downright deserve it" he stated harshly. "Talking in class…have you kids ever learnt the meaning of the word: Respect?! Kids, these days…ugh" he grunted and mumbled some other words, which I believe were something along the lines of "disgusting" and "should be non-existent". He walked alongside us down the deserted hallway on the third floor and then a while later, pointed at a large door on our left. "Here, The Trophy Room" and pushed open the door.
A quite spacious room revealed itself, surrounded by massive shelves covered with a sea of trophies and awards and shields and plates and Merlin knows what. In the center of the floor; two buckets of water stood and two cleaning mobs inside it. I walked in with bloody Malfoy on my side and turned around, only to say politely, to make small talk, anyway "I heard you were retiring this year, Professor Filch"
"Yeah, what of it? I'm as old as they come, anyway. Now, start scrubbing! I'll come back in an hour, and there better not be a single inch of dust in the room, am I clear?!" he walked out the large door, mumbling yet another set of words which cannot be, at all costs, listed here or Mum would probably kill me, you know. Not that she would read my diary, or anything. It was Hugo that I was concerned about. He had been sniffing things up in my room ever since he was little as if everything should've belonged to him in the first place ( Complete prick, I tell you).
But there was a certain event, indeed, that did quite interest me in the worst of ways.
It was this very diary.
And it had gone missing.
Now to get started…
Please ignore my, even-Merlin-thinks-these-are –terrible-writing-skills while I tell you what happened. Yeah, thanks:
Somewhere around the summer holidays in first year, we were all in my house, having some sort of gathering again since the very next day, we had to return to school, and for me; I had to start second year along with Al.
So, as you can guess: Everyone happened to be there, no literally: EVERYONE.
Hell, there were some people who I didn't even know, for all I care; my long lost twin could've been standing in the crowd and Mum would've just shrugged it off as such a simple thing and said, "Oh her, why didn't you know? This your Uncle's friend's cousin's best friend's daughter's adopted cousin" and I would've been there, not surprised at all, since I was dealing with a Weasley, so hearing something bloody insane wouldn't have been so disturbing, but let's just say…part of a daily routine.
I didn't like gatherings, as you can tell; and remained in my room upstairs, on top of my bed, just writing in my diary, ignoring the chattering noise of the guests below and the ever so loud music.
Ugh.
I hate parties.
So flipping much.
I heard a knock on my door and almost instantly said "Come in!" almost certain that it was Githead Hugo, but I was wrong.
It was Mum and she was asking me to come downstairs to make conversation with the guests, and even if it was the last thing on my bloody mind… I happened to just say "Yes" since it's almost universal law to obey your Mum even if you think she's an utter twat, or you know what's coming for you.
So, I headed on downstairs and chatted up with some people such as some Uncles and Aunts, cousins, friends and what not amongst the crowd of people who were standing in the living room, some holding glasses of firewhisky and others devouring liquorish and whatever heart-diesease-casuing-100%-sugar-filled food there was.
And soon, I had spent enough time with my family members and was allowed to go back to my room. And when I did…
It was gone.
Just gone.
My diary, that is.
It had been sitting on top of my bed as I had left it there and the other second it had just vanished.
So, obviously I cursed my fate and almost fainted at the thought of it in someone else's hand. And searched for it like mad for hours, in my room, in the house, outside, any place I could possibly think of.
Heck, I would've walk right in the hands of hell rather than have someone simply reading my diary. I mean, come on; it's my bloody diary for Merlin's sake. Not just some bracelet or piece of parchment.
But as much of a stalking creep my karma was, as you can, clearly, guess: I never again found it.
Until exactly one year later (It's amazing, how I just so happened to defy the laws of karma…AGAIN) in the summer holidays of second year, it was on my bed, on the exact same spot where I had left it.
It was a shocker, really.
One year before, I lose something and never see it again. And exactly one year later, it's sitting right there on my bed as if nothing had happened to it.
And that was what surprised me the most.
It seemed almost untouched as if nothing had taken it away. Every entry happened to be there, my handwriting there as always, none of the pages were the slight bit folded on the edges; heck, it almost seemed to be too perfect, which, at that moment, I realized that the diary had to be stolen away from some source or another. And it had to be someone very, very organized and orderly.
And that's where my Shelock Holmes adventure came to an end.
Since I am Rose Weasley, I didn't happen to find anything else related to the topic.
I guess you can say that it was the most dramatic and mysterious thing that occurred in my useless and plain life and I guess that-
"Aren't you going to clean at all?" I snapped out of my flight of thoughts. Malfoy already held his mob and was scrubbing it back and forth in front while staring at me. I seriously need to start paying attention before rocks really do fall from the sky.
I mean, what is this now, my zillionth time completely zoning out?!
"How long was I just standing there?" I asked, walking up to the bucket of water and grabbing the other mob.
"Around 5 minutes" he answered casually.
"What?!" Oh bloody hell. Did I lose that much time?! Ugh. "Why didn't you say anything earlier?"
"Is that how you repay someone who actually helped you take time off of bloody cleaning?" He puffed his chest and I rolled my eyes.
What the flipping hell? He just almost bloody murdered my cousin and is the cause of all the utter sea of crap I went through today, how can he just…stand there and have time to flipping joke. He has no shame. Like really; no shame detected whatsoever on his radar.
"Don't you dare think you can act like that" I pointed out coldly.
"Like what?" he replied.
"You're acting as though you haven't committed a bloody crime!" I said seriously and he burst into laughter. His mob fell on the floor as he bend down, squeezing his stomach.
"What's so funny?!" I demanded, still quite serious. How come people always bloody laugh when I'm being serious…?! UGH.
"Oh Merlin…I didn't go on a murder spree, did I? Crime…" he managed to say after his laughing fit and I rolled my eyes again.
"You might as well have since you just so happened to almost kill my bloody cousin!" I yelled and his smile vanished and he broke into a silence. And during the awkwardness in the air, I began scrubbing the floor.
"I didn't almost kill him" he answered grimly. "It was an accident…what? You thought, I did it on purpose?!"
"Well…you are a Slytherin" I joked and he didn't laugh or taunt me back. He just released a slight grunt and I knew right there, that I had pissed him off.
Oh well… it is safe to assume 'Mission-Piss- off-Malfoy-next' is working.
But I guess, maybe I shouldn't have gone as far as to joke about that.
Maybe that was just a little too harsh…
Ugh. But he was such a prick! He downright deserved it!
Oh well…Scrub, Scrub…
Got to scrub.
"A-A-Al, has he ever err mentioned me?" I asked desperately after a long pause.
"Mention?" he laughed mockingly.
"What's so funny about that?!" I demanded (Seriously, what an arse)
"Perhaps the fact that he doesn't even talk to me anymore" he responded coldly.
"You too? I thought…but…aren't you…like…best mates? You and that Douche Daniel-" and I regretted every bit of the Douche Daniel part right after I had blurted it out. But, it was a daily routine…calling Malfoy: Mudfloy and Daniel: Douche Daniel. Oh crap, oh crap…he's going to explode now...he's going to kill me with his psychopathic sense and-
"Best mates? Hardly" He paused. "He got pissed at me during fourth year and, I, had no time for him acting like a complete arse" Malfoy stated blankly, saving my soul from his psychopathic sense by ignoring the Douche Daniel bit.
"Why? What happened?" I asked impatiently.
"Look: We fought, he wanted me to stop doing something and I said 'No way in hell' ...end of story. Now, do you want to clean or not?" He blurted out. Oh boy…he was beyond pissed off now. I slowly nodded my head and decided to leave the topic, still scrubbing the same spot I had been cleaning for the past few minutes.
What was with bloody Al getting mad at everyone?
I had been best mates with him since flipping kindergarten and now he doesn't even bat an eye at me. Like what the flipping hell?! And he wasn't like that one bit. He would be sarcastic and spiteful at times but he was only joking, and I knew he was. He had to be. But, he didn't go around breaking off friendships out of nowhere like a complete mad person and not even care about-
"I just...don't know, maybe he just got over our friendship since I do happen to be utterly useless and ordinary…I mean….it's kind of obvious, isn't it?" I whined, staring down at the floor while scrubbing, expecting to hear an "EXACTLY. YOU'RE SUCH A LOSER, LIKE SERIOUSLY" or something along the lines but no…I heard something extremely different. And when I say extremely, I seriously mean it.
"Albus would be bloody mad to break off his friendship with someone like you, don't you even come close to thinking you're useless, Rose" he said in a very non Malfoy talking-to-Rose tone. HOLD ON…HOLDY BLOODY ON…Rewind a bit...Thinking you're useless, Rose.
He did not just call me Rose.
Nope.
Definetly did not.
My mouth almost dropped.
He never, and I mean ever called me by my first name.
I mean…wasn't that a sign of intimacy?
And flipping Mudfloy and I are nowhere near the word intimate, okay? This has to be some sort of beyond psychopathic behavior just so suddenly sprouting from Malfoy's mouth.
It had to be.
Since, things he'd usually say to me were more like: "Don't trip down the stairs, Weasley" or "OH MY GOD! Your body is on fire…oh wait that's just your hair" An out of the world level of pratness, to be quite frank ahem ahem.
I mean, he bloody bullied me. Not to mention that time in fourth year where he gave me flipping flowers, like NO. JUST NO. He was, clearly, bullying me back then, testing my very level of patience and if I had actually accepted those flowers instead of tossing them right at his face, then I'm sure he would've told the story to everyone, no really; EVRERYONE in Hogwarts. Ugh. I was just the useless red head in the corner that seemed to be on fire. It was the truth. No doubt. No questioning that.
But, then…
What did he bloody mean?
Was this code language or something? Was he going to blurt out "HA. I WAS JUST KIDDING. YOU ACTUALLY BELIEVED THAT UTTER LOAD OF CRAP?!" any second? He had to. I mean, he was…was…being just too nice to me…and in the book of Malfoy and Rose's relation, that word is bloody non-existent.
"A-A-Are you serious?" I asked in complete bewilderment, glancing up at him, regretting my words the very second I had said them.
Now, any second now…he's going to say how utterly stupid I am to think that he was actually serious and laugh about it the rest of his life.
No really, he's going to be telling it to his bloody great grandchildren someday; how he managed to fool a certain Rose Weasley into thinking that she was actually worth something in this world.
"Why wouldn't I be?" he interrupted my storm of thoughts in a very sincere tone.
Oh bloody Merlin…
I had, seriously, never heard him speak to me like this. You know, being nice and actually serious at the same time…? I mean, it had to be a sign of the apocalypse, to be exact.
Oh bloody hell.
A crowd of people are just going to rush in through the doors of the Trophy Room and just pat Malfoy in the back and announce, "Ha. She thinks she's not USELESS. Nice one, Malfoy. Ha, joke of the day!" aren't they?
No way.
No bloody way.
I edged up and down uneasily and stared impatiently at the entrance door behind Malfoy. Any second now, any second now, any second n-
"Err…Rose…what in the name of Merlin are you doing?" Malfoy asked very, very confused. I looked back at him in a panic and he continued, "Are you okay?" his tone sincere and actually worried.
"Yeah…I'm…I'm…fine, really" I managed. I shall say no more. I have decided. And I will accept my bloody cursed fate. Those doors will rush open any second and people would clap for the brilliant show Malfoy put on for them since; clearly, Malfoy doesn't treat me like this at all.
He'd treat flipping Lydia Madeline like that but NOT me, at all costs. And there was no questioning it, really. It was the obvious.
"But...but…you're actually being nice to me!" I said quite honestly before he could explode into laughter once again. Ugh. It would be nice, Mudfloy, if I could get answers from you a little faster than that.
"And is that such a bad thing?" he asked, still holding his stomach tightly after yet another laughing fit.
"Bad? Rare, to be exact" I answered and he smiled. But it wasn't a smug smirk like he always has, it was…an actually I'm-happy smile. Not an 'I'm-arrogant-as-hell smile', you know what I mean?
"Is that what you think of me?! I'm shocked" he said in a very, very flirty tone. NO. JUST NO. "Unless I should be mean to you" He said with a flirty but slightly serious tone.
"That'll be too…out of the…." I searched for an answer and Malfoy stood smiling childishly at me, eyeing me intently.
"Daily routine?" he completed, running through the mess his hair was (Has he ever even heard of something called…maybe…A COMB?!) Ugh.
HE DID NOT JUST READ MY FLIPPING MIND.
Am I that TRANSPARENT?!
Ugh.
How'd he even do that?!
What the flipping hell…?
"Telepathy, eh?" I questioned suspiciously, arching an eyebrow. I can't let myself be nice to him at all costs. I can't let my mouth to bloody betray me and utter something nice or…flirty…UGH. I just can't. Or else…that'd be considered…intimate. And we're not intimate! Not in the slightest bit! And for all of you out there who are literally melting all over the floor right now, it's not what you think it is! He…he…almost killed my cousin, remember?!
"More like: You know me so well, Mudfloy!" he mimicked an utterly high pitch voice, which, I assumed, was supposed to be me. Ugh. Can he bloody grow up, already?! Oh right, forgot, it was Mudfloy we were talking about here.
"That sounded like a cat falling off the bloody Astronomy tower more than anything, Malfoy" I answered, pulling back that side of me which was being influenced by Malfoy's unusual behavior (More like not-even-believable but I guess unusual is an alright term too…). He laughed a little and then put his hand on my shoulder out of nowehere.
WHAT?!
HE'S TOUCHING ME?!
No. I refuse.
I just refuse to believe this is happening.
My body didn't get switched with Barbie Lydia's, did it?!
"Wait…you don't sound like that?" he replied in fake shock and STILL that flirty tone. I laughed and shrugged it off.
"Well…I guess, we could consider Filch murdering us when he gets back" he said, pointing at the floor, still full of dust and dirt. I smiled back and just shrugged. "At least, it was worth it"
"Yeah" he agreed and suddenly gasped when he remembered something. "You're not mad…err…about the fact that I almost killed your cousin?"
"Nah, accidents happen, I guess" I smiled vividly and that was the end. The end of our detention.
MY MOUTH BETRAYED ME….NOOOO!
I know.
I flipping know, okay?!
But I refuse to believe it.
I DID NOT JUST FLIRT WITH SCORPIUS MALFOY.
Remminders:
1. Ignore the fact that Malfoy just FLIRTED with me and I flirted bloody back. I didn't! I know I didn't! Laura wrote that utter nonsense over there, I didn't…I didn't…ugh. I know. I'm guilty. I flirted with him. Yep. For the first time in my bloody life. I blame it on my blabbering and ever so betraying mouth more than anything. I had no control over it, damn it!
2. Have a backbone and visit the cousin that just so happened to cut all ties with me. Ugh. Have I ever mentioned how much I hate my life? Probably.
3. Quit zoning out.
4. Return Laura the quill I borrowed from her during Herbology.
5. I don't even know what else to write. I'm far too tired and SHOCKED that the bloke who's been bullying me since FIRST year had the nerve to actually flirt with me. AND I FLIRTED BACK. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!
Author's ending note:
It was really hard, I remember, writing the Rose- Malfoy part since I was avoiding a cliché Malfoy. I wanted him to be different. And I'm sorry that this chapter may have been slightly boring but I had to go back on who Laura is, hints about why Al and Rose don't talk anymore, The diary going missing during first year summer holidays which is EXTREMELY important to the plot. I also had to introduce Ryan Williams to you and as you can probably guess, is the bloke who Rose has a huge crush on.
Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed! Farewell, awesome readers!