Chapter III

Written for the Secret Lesbians Kiliel Week hosted on tumblr by hobbithelltrashsquad.

Day 5 Not-So-Secret Lesbians (Coming Out/Meeting the Parents).

A/N Headcanons aplenty in this chapter. Readers of my other fics may recognise some. :)

The flames were flickering in the crystal lamps which hung from the ceiling, large metal chains travelling up into the shadow of the high vaults and disappearing from sight. The yellow light filled the large antechamber, dancing on the smooth green walls and mingling with the orange hue of the lively fire that burned behind the hearth's intricate iron grate. Kíli passed in front of it for the umpteenth time in her ceaseless pacing back and forth through the length of the room, hands clasped tightly behind her back. Every now and then she glanced nervously towards the closed door on the far end of the room wishing it would open before she turned her back to it, striding in the other direction.

She had been waiting for over an hour to see her mother, but the Princess had all but herself barricaded inside her study with Mister Balin, Ori and three more dwarrows whose names Kíli had not gotten to time to learn - she had seen them more than once, exiting her mother's quarters with rolls upon rolls of parchment and the same weary expression her amad was wont to wear more often than not lately and she supposed they assisted her in the matters of state.

Princess Dís had arrived to Erebor barely a fortnight prior, having left the settlement in the Blue Mountains the day after the raven had brought her the same news of Thorin's success which had made Dáin arrive with his army at the aid of their King. Her mother had looked haggard and weary when she had dismounted her pony, but after a day and a half of resting – and learning the hairbreadth which had separated them from disaster - she had all but banished her Uncle from the treasury in which he hadn't dared setting foot since the day of the battle, and taken over the chamberlain's office.

But dealing with the Kingdom's finances was a tiresome task and her mother had spent the better part of the past ten days locked inside her study with an endless array of people coming in and out, coming out of it only to take her meals. Fíli had bemoaned the little they saw of their mother and Kíli had never before wished to have her only for herself if only for the briefest time. It had been three days since she had tried to talk to her, but it had been nigh impossible.

Three days. She grinned, feeling her heart flutter within her ribcage and she stopped in the middle of her stride, glancing at her reflection in the silver mirror which hung above the mantelpiece. It was a heirloom – or so her Uncle had told her - a courting gift from her Grandfather to Princess Ásdis - Kíli's Grandmother. And she wondered if her Grandparents had felt the same humming within the very stone of their souls when they had braided each other's hair. When they had allowed the most precious pair of hands to touch their hair.

Kíli looked breathlessly at the two tightly woven braids which began just above her ears and laced their way to the back of her hair where she knew Tauriel had joined them in one simple yet sturdy braid. And she remembered the way her long fingers had combed through her locks before parting them. The way her green eyes had not left hers, eyeing her with such open wonder and love Kíli had had to resist the urge to circle her arm around her narrow waist and pull her into a kiss.

She sighed, smiling stupidly, but happy for the memory, happy beyond measure for every moment she had spent with her and she had yet to spend.

But there were traditions to be respected. She looked towards the unmoving door, willing it to open, but the dark polished wood remained fixed on its hinges and Kíli's feet rebelled against their idleness and she found herself walking in circles around the room while she debated her approach, wondering at how to best deliver the news to her mother.

It was already bad enough Tauriel was not there. Traditionally her betrothed would have stood by her side when Kíli would have made the announcement to her family - but traditionally a Dwarrowdam would not pledge herself to an Elf. Kíli knew it would have taken more than her vouching for Tauriel in order for the Elf to be allowed inside the Mountain without explicitly stating her purpose. And Kíli was not going to announce their betrothal to the whole Mountain before she had been given her mother's blessing.

If her mother would give them her blessing, she thought grimly, heaving a sigh and sagging her shoulders slightly.

Suddenly the sound of approaching footsteps broke her from her maudlin thoughts and a moment later the door of her mother's study was flung open. Ori appeared in the doorway, ink-smudged hands holding a stack of parchment against his chest. He flashed Kíli a small smile before he hurried toward the large door which led to the corridors. The other dwarrows followed him a moment later, vivaciously discussing in hushed tones with Mister Balin who was rubbing his hand on his temple.

The door had been left ajar and Kíli swallowed before she squared her shoulders and strode into the study. The large warm room was empty but for her mother who was sitting behind her desk filled with parchment and books sprawled on top of it. Her fingers were pinching the bridge of her nose in exhaustion and Kíli walked towards her wondering if this was the right moment to talk to her.

But she knew she could delay no longer. She had kept her braids a secret for the past three days – and Tauriel for far too long. She had to do it.

Her mother lifted her head, giving her a small smile which made the crinkles on the sides of her sky-blue eyes deepen softly, opening her mouth to speak. But Kíli was faster than her

"Amad, I have taken my braids." she said without preamble, glad she had not stumbled upon her words.

Her mother blinked twice.

"You have taken your braids?" she parroted dumbfounded, her sharp blue eyes wide in bemusement.

"Yes." Kili replied with steel in her voice and, standing tall she blurted "I will not go back on my choice even if you chose to deny us your blessing."

And Kili wouldn't. It was enough to think of the way Tauriel's soft lips would widen in a smile or how her coppery hair would fly in the breeze – how silky it was under her fingers – to make Kíli willing to fight anything, anyone who opposed their union. Even if her heart cracked a little when she thought she might have to choose. But there was no choice. Not for her. Tauriel was too precious. A life without her was no life at all, but the dull trickle of time and the emptiness of a cold forge.

"And why would I that?" her mother asked at last, her dark eyebrows knitting into a frown "Although, I do wonder why he isn't here to stand by your side. I should think it craven..."

"She wanted to come." Kíli exclaimed, incensed and Dís' eyebrows shot up toward her hairline "But she wouldn't have made it past the guards."

"And why is that?" Dís drawled, her voice suddenly cold, but Kíli was not going to back now.

Not when her heart yearned for nothing but the sight of her beautiful Elven maid, for the warmth of her smiles and the starlight which danced in her large eyes. And even if she was ready to fight the world, even if her shoulders were squared Kíli still felt the way her heart sung at the mere thought of her. Of Tauriel.

Her mother was looking at her expectantly, hands folded atop her desk and Kíli lifted her chin defiantly, meeting her eyes squarely.

"Because she is an Elf."