Chapter V

Written for the Secret Lesbians Kiliel Week Day 7 Anything you want!

Secret Lesbians Week hosted on tumblr by hobbithelltrashsquad.

The walkway in the throne room had never seemed so long to Kíli, the giant faces of her ancestors grimly gazing down at her with their carved eyes. Their footsteps resounded loudly in the cavernous chamber while Tauriel walked silently by her side, much too tall and soft amongst the jutting edges chiselled in the green stone and the sharp angles of the gilded patterns that decorated the floor and pillars which held the monumental architecture upright.

And yet, glancing to her left with the corner of her eye, Kíli couldn't help but admire her outlandish beauty. The way her vibrant red hair contrasted with the malachite of the Mountain, green as her eyes which had been observing every detail of the corridors and halls they had crossed on their way to the throne room – and which were eyeing with equal curiosity the way the pale light filtered through the shafts carved in the mountain flanks, reflecting on the golden veins that towered above the broken throne.

Where her Uncle sat.

Thorin was seated proudly, with his crown regally lodged atop his dark curls. His azure eyes were following their motions with an expression Kíli could not read and she wondered if her amad – who was standing to his left – had anticipated the reason for their audience. No guard had tried stopping Tauriel when Kíli had led her through the front gates. Kíli looked at her mother who stood still, resembling of the many gargantuan statues which flanked the walkway with her long raven locks braided into an updo far more complex than the ones he was wont to wear and far more impressive. It gave her the air of a queen of old, mighty and fearsome with her blue-eyed gaze sharp as a spear-point.

And then there was Fíli. Standing to their Uncle's right, Kíli's brother was a ray of sunshine in the thick darkness which clouded the rest of their family. He was looking at them with his chin held up high, but the expression he wore was more akin to wary resignation than the outright hostility which lingered around her Uncle and mother.

Tauriel and her crossed the rest of the distance which separated them from the stiff tableau, Kíli's shoulders squared defiantly and a knot of apprehension in the bottom of her stomach. Once they reached the end of the walkway Kíli inclined her head in greeting while Tauriel bent down into a respectful bow, her long red hair slipping down her shoulders like a stream of molten iron.

"Raise." Thorin's booming voice echoed in the large chamber and her Elven maid straightened her back.

"Speak." he ordered gesturing in Tauriel's direction and Kíli resisted the urge to grab her hand and hold it – whether to give courage of hold herself together she did not know, but it didn't matter. She couldn't. Not now, not here.

"I am Tauriel of Mirkwood, former Captain." she introduced herself in the steadiest voice that betrayed no fear, then, without any further ado she simply told them

"It is my heart's desire to pledge myself to Kíli of Erebor."

Kíli mustered all the seriousness she could before she looked at her Uncle straight in the eye and added

"She has offered me braids." she said "And I have accepted."

His mouth twitched imperceptibly before he asked

"You would bind yourself to an Elf?" nearly spitting the last word and Kíli retorted

"I would bind myself to Tauriel." and then standing tall she added "I will do it regardless of any blessing you or amad may withhold. I'd rather be banished than without her!"

"Kíli..." Tauriel admonished under her breath, levelling her a slightly pained expression.

"Tauriel has been banished for my sake." she said, incensed "And if should have the same fate, so be it!"

Her hands were balled into fists and she was glaring at her Uncle who seemed to ignore her in favour of asking Tauriel

"You were banished?" and the lack of bite in his voice betrayed his curiosity and Kíli still breathed in angry huffs, but a sparkle of hope flickered under her breastbone.

"Yes, I have failed to obey my King." Tauriel said simply and noticing she did not seem inclined to elaborate further Kíli piped in, repeating

"For my sake."

"Explain." Thorin ordered simply and Tauriel gave a small nod.

"The day you escaped we captured one of the orcs" she began in her melodic voice "During the questioning he revealed the nature of the arrow which had hit Kíli. He told us she would soon be dead from the poison"

Her eyes were glassy as she lost herself in the memory she had once shared with Kíli.

"The foul creature rejoiced." she said with a sneer "I wanted to hunt the rest of the orcs down, cleanse the land from their presence."

"Save Kíli." she added softly, before steel seeped back into her voice "But my King would hear none of it. He ordered the Halls locked down. I escaped before the guards had been informed, disobeying him. I was banished."

"That's why you came to Laketown." Kíli's head whipped in the direction of her brother who had unexpectedly spoken.

Fíli was staring at Tauriel, eyeing her with the same begrudging respect he had given her the night they escaped from Laketown, rowing amongst the burning houses and the scorching heat of dragon fire. Then he turned his head towards their Uncle, levelling him an earnest look

"Thorin, if she had not come I don't think we would have survived." Fíli told him grimly, before he added "Kíli certainly wouldn't"

He said the latter looking at Tauriel and she reciprocated his gaze, pressing her beautiful soft lips into a thin line.

"I wouldn't have survived Ravenhill either, for what its worth." Kíli added as an afterthought, hating to think about that battle, about the sight of that large Orc brandishing his weapon at Tauriel, and the whimper of pain that had escaped her lips.

She hated to think how the world had almost stopped in that moment and she would have died a thousand times over if it meant Tauriel would be left unharmed. The latter glanced a her and the sentiment in her eyes mirrored the tight knot which constricted her chest in that moment and Kíli wanted nothing but to touch her, to hold her hand, stroke her hair, or merely feel the heat of her body pressed close to hers, anything to assure herself she was still there, hale and, most importantly, alive.

Kíli swallowed dryly the lump which had formed in her throat, tearing her eyes from her Elven maid, and setting her gaze back to her family. Fíli was looking at the two of them with a deep crease of worry between his blond eyebrows and Kíli knew he regretted not having been by Kíli's side. But if he had perhaps their Uncle would have never made it. They had barely survived the fight against the Pale Orc, Fíli and Thorin. Had Uncle fought alone... her heart lurched painfully at the thought and she looked at him, sharing a look with his sister and nodding grimly. He turned his head towards them and exhaled through his nose before he spoke

"I will not interfere in this matter." his jaw was visibly squared but he continued "Whether this union is to be blessed is your mother's decision alone."

And Kíli felt a sudden bout of hope bubble within her. She widened her eyes looking at her mother's visage, expressionless. Kíli held her breath, waiting for her mother to speak. Dís looked at her and Tauriel for the longest time, her granite face showing no emotion. Then, a flicker of incommensurable sadness crossed her visage for the briefest moment, disappearing so suddenly Kíli was not sure if it had been there or she had merely imagined it.

"I'm not happy." Dís said at last, her voice clear and cutting like a diamond and Kíli stared at her, waiting with bated breath, dreading the next words

Tauriel's knuckles brushed against her own and Kíli took comfort in the touch, while her heart beat fast, hoping, dreaming, pleading her mother to bless them, pleading her not to make her choose between the people she loved the most, between her family and her beloved. Because she knew whom she would choose, she knew nothing would stop her from following Tauriel. Nothing but death. Because a life without her was not worth living, not when she knew that somewhere Tauriel watched the stars or hunted, or simply breathed, her chest rising and dropping with every breath. She loved her more than anything. She would not let her go. Never.

Suddenly her mother spoke again, tearing Kíli away form her thoughts to the harshness of reality. To the cold and draughty throne room, with its broken throne were the gaping hole which should have contained the Arkenstone stood empty, reminding them of the price they had paid to get their homeland back – of how close they had been to losing Thorin to a foe none could battle but himself.

"But I did not give you life to provide for my happiness." her mother said more softly, sagging her shoulders almost imperceptibly "You have my blessing."

And Kíli looked at her with incredulity even as a smile pulled her lips further and further until she was grinning from ear to ear.

They had her blessing. She nearly shook her head in disbelief while she glanced in Tauriel's direction, the Elven maid looking as surprised as she felt. And she couldn't believe it, she truly couldn't. But at the same time there was a joy spreading within her like wildfire and Kíli resisted the urge to pull Tauriel down and kiss her with all the emotion, all the love she felt bursting within her, swallowing her whole.

But she would have the rest of her life to do it. And the thought alone made Kíli wish to stand atop the peak of Mountain and shout at the whole world how happy she was.

How blessed.

A/N This story is now officially complete. A most heartfelt thank you to all those who had read it, followed it and shared their insights. I love you guys, you make writing worthwhile. :)