December 1st

The next morning, Danny tried to call his Dad, but he was repeatedly directed to voice-mail. "Why aren't you answering?", the son asked, not knowing that his Dad was actually sprinting across several flat rooftops downtown. His legs were still strong and although the stiff jacket hindered his run, Frank was not giving up the chase. He'd been at an annual fundraiser, pretending everything was normal, when an Asian guy had tried to deposit a white envelope on Frank's place at the table for the press conference. Luckily, Frank had arrived a little early, just in time to spot the intruder, who, stupid as he was, had dropped the paper and taken off, using the staircase to his right.

"Stop! NYPD!", Frank yelled, feeling a pang of amusement. Who would have thought the Police Commissioner would ever again go after a suspect himself? His feet slipped on the icy gravel on the roof, but Frank continued on, keeping his eyes on the suspect.

"No you don't...", he murmured when the guy came dangerously close to the edge. No! He could not, would not loose his only lead on his youngest son's kidnapper! But even as Frank increased his speed again and lunged, the figure in front of him jumped off the rooftop.

"He did it...", Frank said, rubbing his head. When he heard a weird splashing sound, he stepped closer, smiling to himself when he saw the bizarre scene beneath him, thanking God for his intervention. Then Frank jumped down from the roof as well.

Thankfully his fall was a short one, as he landed safely on a childrens' trampoline about three meters below, jumping a few times to get rid of the momentum. Then the commissioner hopped to the ground, congratulating himself on his elegant landing whereas the criminal must have miscalculated some angles, making him jump too far and land him face first in a swimming-pool. Even now he was trying to heave himself out of the water, but his wet clothes were making movements sluggish.

"Let me give you a hand", Frank said darkly and pulled the man out of the pool. What a pity I'm not carrying cuffs anymore, he thought, mustering the man in front of him. On closer inspection, it was rather a kid, even younger than his Jamie, which didn't excuse anything but made Frank handle him a little less rough. The grip on the wet jacket stayed firm as the commissioner turned him around.

"Where is Jamie?", he demanded to know, shaking the man a little. Not enough to warrant a formal complaint later.

"Who?" The Asian teenager seemed honestly surprised and scared a lot. Somebody had probably paid him off to deliver the envelope, Frank reasoned. But who?

"What's your name, son?"

"Hei. Hei Hatsumoto."

"Very well, Hei. You have two possibilities now. The first one involves me sending you to jail for kidnapping, aggravated battery, attempted murder and everything else my daughter can think of - and believe me, she's never been as motivated to put anyone behind bars before." At his little speech, the man's eyes widened until he looked a lot like a stranded carp, gasping for air. Of course Frank new that he looked imposing in his suit, not to speak of his height or the medal on his chest.

"What... what's the other possibility?" Good old intimidation, works every time, Frank thought, thinking about his eldest son who often told him the same thing. Bending the rules might not be right, but this case warranted any means necessary.

"The two of us are going to go to the nearest precinct now, where you'll make a statement and then we'll send you a specialist who will draw a wanted poster from your directions. We either find the man who gave you that envelope or you will get the punishment that was meant for him", Frank threatened, making use of Danny's advice freely. The little kid was already scared witless, only nodding and holding out his hands in a gesture of peace.

"Whatever you say, man. I just wanted the two-hundred bucks he promised. I had no idea there was something illegal in there."

"Two-hundred dollar for the deliverance of one package? And you didn't second-guess the nature of that envelope?"

"No, Sir. I'm sorry." If we don't find Jamie alive, you will be. If we don't... Frank swallowed slowly. We will find him. Determinedly, he pushed Hei in front of him, leaving the garden and stepping out onto the street. On the way, he picked up his phone again, noticing the message from Danny that said the meeting had been fine. In the distance, sirens could be heard and a minute later a patrol car came to pick him up.

Four hours later, Hei was on his way home and they had a drawing to work with. Somehow the man on it seemed familiar, but Frank couldn't for the life of him identify the criminal. Danny had been clueless as well when he'd been sent the picture. Now they were waiting for a match in the database.

All that had been left to examine was the envelope itself, which had been checked by forensics immediately. Nothing.

Frank sighed, looking into his office where a tired, sick-looking family waited for him. He almost couldn't make himself go in there, knowing what he would have to do. As soon as the opened the stream, something horrible would happen to his youngest. How could he? But delaying would make everything worse. He'd spoken to a profiler about this case, staying in the hypothetical realm, of course. According to the Doctor, waiting would anger the perp, increasing the possibility of even more volatile temper. There was no way around it, Frank conceded and opened the double doors.

"Are you alright?", he asked Erin, scolding himself right away. None of them were okay, they wouldn't be until Jamie was found. The clock on his desk told him it was past midnight, yet none of them looked like they wanted to go to bed and face their demons.

The scene was different this time, a shaky hand-camera provided a close-up of a door. Seconds after they had activated the stream, glove-wearing fingers picked it up, opened the door and showed the cell from the inside. The new perspective fully revealed just how tiny the room was, barely six square meters and no windows. His son had been stuck there for more than a fortnight, injured. Frank growled. When the criminal turned the lens towards the bed where his son was sleeping the sleep of the physically and mentally exhausted, the family started to shout and protest. Jamie was not waking up.

"He doesn't hear us", Nicki said, sounding more afraid than he'd ever heard her. Erin and her daughter were tightly entangled, drawing strength from each other. That's right, Frank thought, in times of trouble we stand closer than ever. And we're going to catch him, we're already getting closer.

Meanwhile, the camera was being deposited on the back of the chair, giving a good view of the bed. The criminal waited a few seconds, heightening the tension, then carefully reached out to undo the button of Jamie's jeans. What was he doing? Cold fear washed over Frank, Erin was taking in a hissing breath and Henry looked murderous. Slowly, celebrating every second, the man drew the zipper down, inch by inch bringing Jamie closer to disaster.

"Wake up. Wake up, wake up, wakeupwakeupwakeupwakeupwakeup!", Nicki cried out, both hands pressed to her mouth in horror. Frank knew that this reaction was sugar and flowers for the criminal, so he trained his face to blandness. But it was hard, god, it was so hard to stay detached. Frank blinked once, then forced himself to watch as the criminal pulled his son's trousers down.

"I can't...", Erin muttered, drawing away, only to be grabbed by her own daughter, whose face was tear-stained but as hard as stone.

"Yes, you can!" So she stayed. Stayed while the man carefully ruffled Jamie's underwear and placed some fluid on him. In front of him, Henry frowned, then Frank saw his father relax slightly.

"He's not gonna do it. It's a trick. Nothing but a try to screw up Jamie's mind. You see?" And he was right, the man didn't make any move to undress his captive any further, instead laughing dirtily, slapping Jamie's underside and thereby waking him.

"Well, that was fun, wasn't it? Although I had hoped for a little more action on your side!"

The look of utter devastation on Jamie's face as he took in the stated of his clothes and the pleased posture of the man before him was heartbreaking. Now Frank did wince, catching himself only after it was too late. Then Jamie did something that surprised all of them: he yanked up his jeans in one quick movement, jumped from the bed and landed a powerful right hook in the attacker's face, who stumbled back.

Erin snorted, Nicki cheered and Henry murmured something like "Go for it, kid!". It was a hopeless endeavor, of course, seeing that the criminal was bigger and Jamie was weakened and unarmed. As suspected, a vicious blow to the ribs made his son crumple to the floor before he reached the door. The display of resistance, however, had been quite formidable.

"That's the spirit", Frank said loudly, smiling at the camera.

Hours later, Jamie was sitting on the floor, warily looking at the bed. He could not lie down on it after what had happened there - what might have happened, he corrected himself. He'd washed the substance from his clothes as soon as Casper had left, but it hadn't been enough to set his mind at ease. Countless questions of What ifs haunted him, making sleep impossible. A while ago, the shaking had subsided, leaving him even more tired than he'd been before his nap. Jamie felt like he could sleep a thousand years, yet he would never sleep again. What if his family had watched while... What if Danny had seen that? He knew he'd been drugged again, perhaps he'd been unable to wake up? What if...?

"Not happening", he told himself sternly. This, these endless doubts had been exactly what his brother had warned him about. They'll make you stop fighting if you let them,he'd said. They destroy you from the inside if you give them any room. Placing his head in his hands, Jamie willed his muscles to relax. Pure determination was the only thing keeping him upright these days, combined with the small victories like the message to Danny or the punch. Think of the good times, the times you've won, his brother's voice spoke in his mind.

"You know, I would beat you if it were a fair and square fight. Like the time when Vinny and me went at it. Or when Danny tried to teach me a lesson about boxing and ended up being the one that was taught", Jamie pointed out to the ever-blinking camera. As much as he tried to hide it, his eyes always returned to the wet spot on his shredded jeans whereas his hands nervously kept away from it.

What if it had happened? What if he'd... he'd... been raped. He made himself think it through, taking his time to come to terms with the possibility. So what if? Jamie felt dirty, deeply within himself. Disgusted at his own body. But he was still alive and fighting and that was what mattered most. Reagans fight. Reagans don't give up because they're scared and hurt and alone. We fight. We survive. He would survive this, and if he had to lie to himself to do it, then he would. This didn't happen. It's water. This never happened. It's all a mind-game. This never happened.

It took him over an hour to be able to touch the stain and another two until he only felt mildly horrified when he thought of the episode of him waking up with Casper above him. This never happened. Think of the good things.

"Fuck this, I'm tired." What an awful choice of words, he thought with a wry grin on his face. Without haste, he turned over the small pillow on his bed and settled himself on the covers, his back to the wall. Think of the good times, he repeated silently.

A/N: Well... that turned out darker than I had anticipated. Did you like it? Please leave a review, it would mean so much to me!