Author Note: Just wanted to say thank you to those who review, follow, and favorite me and the story. It makes me really happy and inspires me to write and publish more chapters and stories. For those who were wondering, there will be a sequel at the end that follows the baby. Also, don't hate on this chapter title. I'M BRAIN DEAD!

Me: Lenalee, will you do the honors?

Lenalee: Of course. Crowsnight doesn't own DGM or the characters, just the plot.

Me: On to chapter 18!

Situation

Chapter 18: No Kill But Not No Kanda

I press my cheek against Kanda's and whisper, "You look beautiful when you cry."

He replies, "I would say the same to you, but half the time the reason you're crying kind of ruins it."

I know what he means. It's rare for me to cry in happiness. When I cry, it's generally because I'm feeling pathetic and worthless, or in one case about to kill myself. Crying was practically a lifestyle for me, and it's only just beginning to change. I wrap my arms around his waist, "Is that at least half a compliment?"

"Yes, it was," he says, his arms circling my body and pulling me closer to him. I smile, "I've noticed something."

He looks at me as I nuzzle into his neck, and turns off the water pouring into the tub, "What would that be?"

"You seem to like being next to me, and having our bodies together."

Kanda looks at me like I was an idiot, but soon softened into a sweet, genuine smile, "Well, yeah, you're my boyfriend, but I like to comfort you. It means a lot when you calm down when we're together."

I never really had thought about it like that. For me, needing him to be with me when I was breaking was a burden on him. It wasn't something that I thought brought him joy. I say, "Really?"

He nods, "Allen, you're gorgeous when you cry, and it has great meaning in my heart when you come to me when you're upset." His hand moves from the small of my back to my stomach, rubbing circles over my navel.

I smile at the gesture, putting my small hand on his muscular shoulder, and I can't help but let a single tear slide down my cheek. Who knew that one day, I would be sitting naked in a bath tub with Kanda, pregnant with his baby, and had actually seen him cry? No one would have ever predicted that, and I don't blame them. Quietly, I say, "Thank you."

He doesn't reply, but kisses my crown instead.

oO_Oo_oO_Oo

I keep my eyes closed as I wake up, breathing in the sweet, intoxicating scent of Moonlight Mist. It was abnormal for me to awaken curled up half on top of Kanda, but he must not mind since he didn't push me off. My chest, arms, and head were all piled on his torso and my hips and below were beside him. From his steady breathing, I assume he was still asleep, and I tentatively open one eye.

I was right. His eyes were still closed and his hair was fanned out on the pillow his head was resting on. I absolutely loved his expression when he sleeps because he looks so peaceful, like he hasn't a care in the world. Then, his expression changed ever so slightly and even though his heartbeat and breathing was steady, I knew he was awake. I raise up and pout, "Why can't you ever stay asleep?"

He smirks, his eyes still closed, "How did you know I was awake?"

"Your face changed. It was barely noticeable, but it looked different," I say, my hands planted on his chest as I glare at him.

His eyes open and our gazes meet as he says, "I didn't know you had such an eye for detail."

"Are we going to have the 'I'm that gay' discussion, again?" I roll my eyes and sit down next to him while he straightens. The bluenette tucked a strand of hair behind his ear absently and said, "No, we're not, and for the record, being gay isn't something to be ashamed of."

I nod, "I know, but I want to hear you say it since you couldn't last time."

He sighs, "Fine, I'm gay, too. Are you happy?"

"Yes, I am," I reply, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek before glancing at the clock. It was eleven in the morning, which means it's the first of December. I had nearly forgotten! I had meant to go to the no kill animal shelter today. Generally, I try to go on the first day of every month, and a couple more times if I can. Since I wouldn't be going on any missions for seven months then I guess I'd have more time to visit. I stand and walk into the bathroom, taking a pill and beginning to brush my teeth.

"What do you seem so happy about?" my boyfriend asks, coming up behind me, pulling on his jeans and a t-shirt. I spit into the sink and wipe my mouth, "I'm going to the no kill animal shelter today. Do you want to come?"

Moving to my dresser, I start searching for my jeans and turtleneck while my boyfriend replies, "Um…I can if you want me to. Animals don't like me very much though.

I giggle as I dress, "Well, you won't know if these animals will like you unless you meet them."

"Okay, but I'm not getting you one," he says, tossing me my jacket from the floor beside the bed and while pulling his on. As I catch the jacket, a pair of black boxers falls from it, and I quickly kick them under the bed, blushing furiously. Of course, my boyfriend just smirks and walks towards the door, slapping my butt as he went and eliciting a yelp from me. My blush only deepens as I follow Kanda out the door, heading towards the cafeteria.

We eat in less than twenty minutes, and I was not happy with the fact that Jerry was informed of my situation. He was now making a special vitamin smoothie that I had to drink every time I ate, but I wasn't complaining about it since it was probably the best thing I'd ever drank.

Kanda and I walk to the shelter, and I ask, "Do you really not like animals?"

"I never said I didn't like them. They don't like me. Every time I get near a cat it hisses and a dog will bark," he replied, staring straight ahead.

"Well, no offense, but you don't have the most inviting attitude. Animals can sense a person's feelings," I say, opening the door to shelter. "Cats or dogs?"

"Cats," he says. I was a little surprised since I figured he was more of a dog person, but I lead him to the cat room. As we went, a woman passed us and asked, "Excuse me, where do I get the leash to walk the dogs?"

I point the way we came, "You need to talk to the person at the front desk, and they'll give you the leash and unlock the cage for you."

"Thank you," she said, heading the way I was pointing. I nod and continue down the hall with Kanda trailing behind me. He asks, "How often do you come here?"

I open the door to the cat room, "About every two weeks, but I always come the first day of each month."

The room was pink, with small cages lining the right wall and cat towers everywhere. As I walk in, I had to be careful not to step on any toys. There was a short, middle-aged woman standing at one of the cages, putting some fresh water in the bowl. Her name was Lila Evers and I know her very well. She volunteers here every weekend from dawn to dusk in the cat room, and always keeps me up to date with what was going on. I guess I consider her a mother in a way mixed with a best friend.

She turned around, smiling as she always did, and ran over to me, throwing her arms around my neck, "Allen! I haven't seen you in forever!"

I roll my eyes and return her hug before pulling away, "You always say that. It's only been a few weeks."

"It's the same thing," her gaze flickered to Kanda, who was standing behind me, glancing around awkwardly. She looked him up and down, "Who's this pretty thing? I might take him from you."

I put my arm around his shoulders, "Lila, this is my boyfriend, Yu Kanda, but he goes by Kanda."

She smiles and holds out her hand, "Hello Kanda, I'm Lila Evers. I volunteer here, and will beat you if you don't take care of my Allen."

He shook her hand hesitantly, glancing at me, and I said, "She's a little protective."

"I never would have guessed," he replied. Picking a new topic, I say, "Any new arrivals?"

Lila nods and walks over to a cat tower with an opening at the bottom, reaching a hand in. When she pulls out her hand, she's holding two pineapple-sized kittens, one solid black and the other calico black and orange. I took the black one in my hand, bringing it to my chest to cradle it while looking into its hypnotizing blue eyes. It's rare to ever see a black cat with blue eyes, and I just think it's amazing to see one. Kanda walks up beside me, peering at the kitten and it hisses. I place it back in the box so it won't jump out of my arms, and say, "You weren't kidding that animals hate you."

He doesn't say anything, but looks at the floor. I follow his gaze and see a young cat with three legs hobbling towards Kanda's feet. It was snow white and was missing its left front leg. Its left eye had a long, red scar over it, and I say, "Me."

At the exact same moment Kanda says, "You." I'm not sure who was more shocked as it plopped down on his boot, me or Kanda. Lila said, "We named her Ice."

Kanda kneeled down and held out his hand, waiting to see how Ice would react. She gave his hand a sniff before licking his thumb, and I smile, "Maybe not every animal hates you."

Carefully, my boyfriend picks up the small cat, scratching under her chin as she purrs. Her head was back and she looked at me, her mismatched eyes making me jump slightly. Lila said, "We think she's part albino."

I nod, gazing into Ice's silver and blood red eyes. It was nearly impossible how much the creature looked like me when I didn't have my left arm, and I wasn't sure whether to be scared of it not.

Kanda wasn't worried about at all because he was shaking a small feather toy over Ice's head just high enough that when she reached up with her small paws, she was just a few millimeters off. I never thought I'd see the stoic samurai playing with a cat, especially not in public. He won't even let me call him Kandy outside of our make out sessions in our room.

"It surprises me that she's playing with him. She hisses at everyone and stays away from the other cats," Lila says as she petted the head of Dark Angel, a black she-cat with yellow eyes and white bat-like marking on her flank.

"Really?" I say. This cat just kept getting more like me by the second. I glance down at Ice, who was now crouching in front of Kanda with her flank in the air, tail thrashing as her eyes locked on the feather toy 'crawling' across the floor. The connection between the cat and bluenette was as obvious as her mismatched eyes. Lila replied, "Yeah. Better be careful, the cat's going to take your place, Allen."

I laugh, "I doubt it. Kanda knows which one of us has what he wants."

She raised an eyebrow at me, but said nothing, continuing to go through short petting sessions with the cats. Sitting beside Kanda, I grab a stick with a string and furry ball attached to it, and look into the cat tower box before me, determining that there was a feline inside. I swing the ball in front of the opening until a gray tabby jumped out. I smile, "Hi, Wolfy!"

Wolfy proceeded to try to attack the toy as I moved it, his fluffy tail swishing back and forth. I loved playing with the cats when I come here, but from the look of it, I won't be hanging out with the dogs any today. I didn't mind though since my boyfriend was having a good time. Letting Wolfy grab and chew on the toy, I lean towards Kanda and whisper in his ear, "You're not replacing me with Ice like Lila said, are you?"

He glances away from the critter in his lap, "No. Besides, I'm pretty sure if I tried using her as a substitute you, I'd be put in jail for animal cruelty."

I reply, "Why isn't it rape when you do those things to me?"

"It's not rape if you like it," he seductively whispers, kissing my jaw. I whimper as he pulls away and begins scratching Ice's belly. She purrs, her tongue actually hanging out of her mouth. I grin at how dumb and cute she looked.

Oo_oO_Oo_oO

"So, was it fun?" I ask, hopping on the bed and pulling off my jacket. We had just got back after eating, and I had asked Lenalee a question while Kanda wasn't listening. I was very happy with the answer and since twenty-four didn't happen in the bath, I was going to do something about that. He nods, "Yeah, I had a good time."

He went into the bathroom, shrugging off his jacket as he walked in. Taking advantage of the moment, I pull my iPod out from under my pillow and turn up the volume all the way while playing "Animals" by Nickelback.

My boyfriend didn't need to be asked twice, and after I blink, he was over me. I say, "Lenalee said it would even help the baby, but only as long as you don't nearly kill me."

He smirks and attacks my neck, biting and kissing down until my shirt stopped him. Pulling my shirt over my head he continues down as my iPod blasts, "It's hard to steer when you're breathing in my ear, but I got both hands on the wheel while you got both hands on my gears."

I follow the music's lead and Kanda gasps, nearly collapsing on top of me from the shock. Keeping one hand where it was, I move the other to his back and flip us. Somehow, during the transition the bluenette's shirt landed on the floor along with his hair tie, and his hair was fanned out around him. His face was red and his breath was coming in short pants as my hand's grip tightens.

I suck on one of his nipples, and he digs his nails into my back, definitely leaving marks. He groans under me, and I take it as a good sign. I move my hand and begin to fumble with the button of his pants.

Author Note: Okay, so I know it was a short chapter, and on top of that, my next update probably won't be until Thursday. Sorry! I have a book report I have to write that day and I've still got like four hundred pages to read of Beautiful Creatures. Please, Please, PLEASE R/R!