During our kiss, Eric clutched my back in a way that made me want to push him onto the floor and fuck him right there. We couldn't though.

"The babies are still asleep..." He whispered suggestively in my ear.

"Yes they are." I replied, heading for the bedroom, Eric right behind me.

The second we were in the room with the door closed, I grabbed my husband by the shoulders and yanked his body against mine, putting myself between him and the wall.

"Someone's getting kinky..." He laughed at me before picking me up and kissing me.

Eric sat me on the bed, and removed his shirt. I slipped my shorts off, and he did the same with his.

I pulled him down to my level to kiss him again, gently teasing his growing erection with my free hand.

He slowly started to pull my shirt up, but I pushed his hands away.

"Babe, why did you do that?" Eric asked me suspiciously, looking straight into my eyes.

"Do what?" I pretended to be clueless.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about."

"So what?"

"Are you hiding something?"

"Pfft, no." I scoffed, rolling my eyes.

"That's what it seems like to me."

"Eric! Stop! I'm not fucking hiding anything!"

"Then why won't you let me take off your shirt?"

"Are you going to make me tell you?"

"Well I'm not going to make you, but I will keep asking."

"Ok."

"Are you going to tell me?"

"Why?"

"Jen, what is so bad that you don't want me to know- or see or whatever?"

"You'll just tell me it's stupid-"

"Oh shit, is it what I think it is?"

"I don't know, I can't read your thoughts."

"Are you cutting yourself?" Eric asked me nervously.

"What? No!"

"Then what?"

"I don't like the way my body looks anymore." I admitted, looking away in shame.

"Why not?"

I yanked my shirt over my head and threw it down.

"Loose skin, stretch marks, the incision scar, fat-"

"Woah, hold up! Jen, babe, those things are beautiful!"

"No they're not! What the hell is beautiful about this?" I asked, pointing at my stomach.

"Jen, you got those because your body made, grew and sheltered three healthy, beautiful baby girls, and it had to change to do that. Would you rather have all these scars like I do, from slashing my skin open with metal over and over again? You can actually be proud of your marks!"

"Eric, you need to be proud of your scars! They're scars- not open wounds- because you survived and got better!"

"And you had three perfect babies!"

"Whatever. Let's not fight about it."

"Are we still going to-"

"Shut up and do me!" I interrupted, then kissed him.

The next week...

I finally got the pills to start birth control, and was able to begin with it. We definitely didn't need another baby yet, if ever. We had talked a little bit about trying for a boy in a few years though. Nothing was for sure, except when and if the time was right, we'd decide on it then.

In the meantime, I went back to work, finishing up my work on the maternity line, since Madison was nearly two months old.

It really was turning out great.

Blair was about six months pregnant, and strangely nice to everyone these days. Part of me honestly thought it was just practice for their baby, but maybe she really was changing.

She kept asking my opinion on all the details of her baby shower, which she would've never done in high school. But again, this wasn't high school anymore. She was almost 21, Chuck was 21, Eric and I were both 19, and we were all married and being/becoming parents. Things were different now.

Vanessa and Nate were planning their wedding, since they'd been engaged forever and already had two kids together, plus V had Alison.

Eleanor, Blair and I completed the maternity line for Waldorf Designs on the last day of August, and immediately started working on its debut.

We organized the layouts for magazine advertisements, set up item prices and had tons many of each piece created.

There was still bunches of work to be done.

In the middle of all the work, there were quite a few events. We all attended a few charity benefits, a few fashion shows, and a movie premiere (that was just for fun though).

Blair gave out the invitations to her baby shower, which would take place on September 23.

Vanessa asked me to be her lady of honor at her and Nate's wedding, and I agreed.

Dan had a big party to celebrate his book's success, and to announce that he was working on a sequel (the party was on September 2).

Serena also announced at the party that she was launching a lifestyle and parenting blog, and she would be putting it up on September 11.

Chuck held a party on September 8 to announce that he had bought a new building that he would be turning into a childcare center.

On September 11, Serena launched her blog and wrote her first article for it. The launch was greatly successful.

Finally, Blair's baby shower day arrived. During the party, the gender announcement took place by the classic color inside the cake reveal. When the cake was sliced, it was out. The inside was baby blue; Chuck and Blair were having a boy.

"It's strange how everyone around us has had a boy except us." I whispered to Eric.

"Yeah, that is a bit weird." He agreed.

It was a fact: Dad had Dan, Lily had Eric, Blair was having a boy who was yet unnamed, Dan and Serena had Brent, Vanessa and Nate had Ryder and David, Fiona had a boy, and we just had girls. I wasn't complaining, because I love our girls, but it would be nice to have a boy in the mix also.

Around the bit of time with all the events, Eric began a tradition: every other night he had a beer. Sometimes he'd forget I was breastfeeding Madison and he'd ask if I wanted to join him. I'd just laugh and sit with him.

Towards the end of September, I decided to stop hating my body and start fixing it. I started a diet and a workout plan, exercising every other day for an hour to begin with.

Also by the end of September, we had most of the details of the fashion line sorted out.

Blair would be the model on the ads, and we would start the photo shoots for them in early October.

On October 3, we all went to Brent's third birthday party at the loft. Brent was tall for a three year old, and had inherited Serena's hair and mouth, but the rest of him was obviously from Dan. The twins however, it was still to early to tell who they looked like.

The first photo shoot day was October 9, and it continued throughout the whole week.

Then it was time to put the ads together, which took yet another week.

Surprisingly, the diet I was on wasn't all that hard to stick to, and I was already seeing a bit of results.

Eric and I decided to start doing 'three year old pictures' with each of the girls when they turned three. We'd also do pictures every year after that.

Vanessa asked me to go look at wedding dresses with her, and I did. It was fun, looking through all the pretty dresses and all the different styles and colors.

She told me about their plans so far. They were going to have a winter wedding in December, then have their honeymoon in Germany. During that time, they would need someone to watch their kids, and I volunteered to do it. After that, she planned on going to beauty school, as she told me about the day before my wedding, two years ago, so she could have a decent job.

I was happy for her; she had everything planned out. I had nothing planned out, except the fashion line, but that was just work. Eric and I weren't doing anything majorly fun, I wasn't going to college now that we had another baby. Oh well, things would just happen as time went along.