Chapter 17: Double Date.

There was only one thing running through my mind as we sat at the lush corner table at the Palamino.

Awkward. This was really really awkward.

Neville sat directly across from me, luckily I was able to calm him down enough on the way over that he had stopped sweating, again. Ginny sat on my right side surveying her menu while Hannah was on my left looking absolutely unsure of what she should do.

"Isn't this cozy, Boy-girl, girl-boy?" They all stared at me for a long moment, perplexed by my meaning.

I guess there are no White Christmas fans in the house.

Ginny, picking up my ulterior motive tried to at least continue the conversation. "Indeed. I love this place, their Chicken Marsala is amazing."

More stagnant silence hung between us.

The waiter materialized with the bottle of wine that we had ordered. Ginny had assured us that the Palamino was known for their Red's and after the waiter filled our glasses with a splash each assuring us the wine was both bold and sophisticated he placed the bottle between us with the promise to return in a moment to take our order.

I took a small sip of my wine and resisted the urge to make a face. I wasn't really much of a wine drinker, and it neither tasted bold nor sophisticated. It tasted like arse.

It must of tasted like pumpkin juice to Ginny, because she had already downed her first glass and was reaching to fill her second.

As my eyes bounced around the stifling scene I had the urge to join her.

If only this were Firewhiskey instead.

After what seemed like the most forced minute of normalcy I've ever encountered. Hannah quietly spoke. "I've… I've never been here before." Her lashes lowered slightly as she gave Neville a shy sideways glance. He responded by tugging on the collar of his shirt with his forefinger and clearing his throat.

"Neither….neither have I. I heard it was nice though." Their eyes met over the rim of a wineglass and both developed small smiles.

I have no idea how this is working for him right now.

I don't think I have ever met someone with less skill talking to woman than Neville. Yet, here he is acting as if it was still second year and still tripped over words and his own feet and he was absolutely killing it.

It was fascinating honestly. I felt like I was doing some sort of scientific investigation. I just couldn't look away.

I had another flicker of renewed hope.

I mean, if Neville Longbottom in the midst of a panic attack could do it…

"So how are things at the Auror office since I left?" Neville took another sip of wine.

"Good. Everyone's been pretty busy. There's always a ton of paperwork that no one wants to do."

Hannah chuckled lightly. "I definitely don't miss that."

Out of the corner of my eye I caught Ginny's gaze and we gave each other a knowing look. It was pretty apparent that we were no longer going to be necessary soon. Neville was visibly calming down, his face was draining of the nervous red flush and conversation was slowly becoming easier and easier for them.

I could almost forgive him for slamming us into this sporadic double date. Almost.

We were still going to have words about this later.

If the fact that Ginny was on her third glass of wine and the waiter was just now on his way over to take our order was any indication of how this night was going to go. I would say not well.

I was surprised as hell at Neville's insistence that we accompany them, almost as surprised as Ginny actually agreeing to the whole thing. I figured that her loud outburst of "What?" was going to be followed by something along the lines of "the hell are you on?" followed by a "Hell no."

Instead she had kept her opinions to herself and wound up beside me on someone else's date.

I was surprised.

And more than a little thrilled.

True to her word Ginny ordered the Chicken Marsala, Neville and I leaned towards the steak,while Hannah ordered the salmon.

While they waited the lovebirds scooted their chairs closer as they became engrossed in conversation with each other.

It was so damn adorable it was kind of gross.

I wrinkled my nose at Ginny, who chuckled lightly. Her hands fiddled with the hem of her shirt, I think that she likes to forget that I know her sometimes. Hmmmm… now why in the world would Ginny be nervous?

I didn't get much time to ponder that question.

"How are things going with your parent's house?"

It took me a moment to process what she was saying. "Good, good. Yeah. Pretty slow. I'm really trying to do most of the work by myself. Ron and Neville have been out a few times to help me."

Her eyebrow quirked at me as a smirk tugged at her lips. I felt my pants tighten painfully underneath the table. Circe she was gorgeous.

"I find it hard to believe that Harry Potter knows how to build a house."

I leaned my elbow on the table, my face leaning against my closed fingers. My eyes traced the lines of her face in the low light. I smiled at her jest, the wine was clearly putting her in a playful mood.

"I am a man of many hidden talents."

She smiled, I could feel the warmth of it from where I sat, almost as if I was standing in the sun's rays.

"And I suppose building a house just happens to be one of them."

"Yes."

"You lie."

"I've built a house before." The expression on her face clearly showed that she didn't believe a word I was saying.

"When?" I answered before really thinking.

"When I was in Brazil."

She didn't have an answer to that. She didn't really need to, the unspoken words hung between us as our food arrived and we could try to ignore what they were.

When I was gone.

We began to eat, Neville and Hannah still talking in between bites, but the playful banter I had with Ginny was gone for now. Ginny's voice filtered across the table as I cut into my steak. "How is everything?"

Hannah replied with a beaming smile. A new tinge of confidence to her voice. "Wonderful. The salmon is to die for."

I mumbled a quick. "Great." Before lapsing back into my silence. I grabbed my wine, taking a sip. This stuff was truly atrocious, I had no idea how people went so barmy over it. It was a feat that I could swallow it let alone stomach it for long. This will most likely be the last time I partake in this stuff. If the waiter were to come back by here I could order something drinkable. He seemed to have apparated to Tibet or some rubbish because the flamboyantly French waiter was nowhere to be seen.

We all made our way through the meal, exchanging pleasantries. Some forced, some not so forced. All in all Neville's date was wrapping up to be a success. Later I will have to remind him that he had it in him all along, he just didn't know it yet. I suppose this date could have ended up in more of a disaster, Ginny and I could have gotten into a screaming match and Hannah could have tossed her drink in Neville's face. Sweat marks aside, I think I'd chalk this one us as a win.

The food consumed and the bottle of wine down. We were all rubbing our bellies and dabbing at our mouths with our over pressed napkins. As Neville motioned for the check, Hannah gave us an unreadable expression.

"Are you two…" She paused forking her fingers at us. "…back together or something?"

I wish.

"No." Ginny said quickly. Giving my heart enough time to sink down into my stomach before I followed.

"Ummm… No we're just friends."

"Are we ready?" Neville said with a debonair smile. I swear to you, Neville Longbottom pulled off debonair.

"I think so." Ginny said as we walked to the coat check and grabbed our things. We went out into the bitter night air. I watched Ginny wrap her coat tighter around herself and I would have given anything to be able to pull her against me, my arm wrapped around her shoulders.

For being a bloke, I was in desperate need of a cuddle.

Neville sidled up next to me, his back turned to the girls. In a mere whisper he said, "Thanks, Harry. For everything."

I gave him a genial grin, clapping him on the back as I spun him around. "Don't mention it."

We waved goodbye to the happy couple as the wandered off into the nights shadows. Just like before that night, Ginny and I were left alone with whatever it was that we had between us. She laughed a little as Neville and Hannah finally disappeared.

"I honestly didn't see that ending that well." She said pulling her coat tighter around her and moved in the direction of her flat.

My hands shoved themselves into my pockets trying to stop themselves from nervously ruffling my hair. I didn't want her to know that she was making me nervous. Merlin, half the time she made me nervous just by thinking about her.

"Me neither." We walked in silence for a few moments. It was the first time tonight that the air of silence wasn't laced with awkwardness. It was nice.

"You don't have to walk me home you know?" She finally said, chancing a glance in my direction.

"What kind of elected date would I be if I didn't at least walk you to your door." She agreed, with a playful roll of her eyes. My stomach flipped flopped at the telltale signs of her bettering mood. It was insane how much my own mood depended on hers. How everything could change just by seeing her smile.

"Fine. But walk faster. I am freezing."

It was only polite to ask Harry up after he had walked with me fourteen blocks home. It was like negative seven degrees outside, it would have borderline torture if I hadn't . Like, seriously he could have been so frozen that he apparated wrong and left behind a hand. And let me tell you, Harry Potter without the use of his hands would be a waste.

Maybe I was covering the fact that I was lying.

To myself of all people.

Sure, it was polite to invite Harry inside, and it was even polite to offer him a cup of tea to ward off any chill.

But that wasn't entirely the reason that I did it.

He sat on the complete opposite side of the couch sipping his tea. I devoured the sight of him. Not that I couldn't close my eyes and picture every shocking detail of his face. Every expression that I had seen since he had returned was permanently engraved in my mind. It was a curse. It was my curse.

"Thank you for letting me help with the whole Neville thing. I can't wait until they get married." I folded my legs underneath me as I leaned against my side of the couch.

He rose on slashing black eyebrow at me. "It's a little early for that don't you think?"

I scoffed at that, "No. It is inevitable, they are meant to be. There is no way that much adorable can date each other and not get married."

"Sure."

We both took our time, sipping on our tea and basking in each others company, I was the first to admit that tonight had seemed better for us. Friendlier even. It was getting easier and I had no idea how or why.

"I'm glad we got them together though. It was nice of you to go out of your way for a friend."

His face turned solemn as he fidgeted with his tea cup. "Yeah well, I owed him a few." His voice was low, sad even. I resisted the urge to crawl across the couch and comfort him. That was no longer my place.

I shuffled to my feet grabbing my cup and draining it. "Do you want another?"

I know that he stood too, I could feel it in the air as it changed. "Ginny…" I didn't dare turn around to look at him as I sauntered into my kitchen. I knew what was coming as he followed me onto the tile. I busied myself with fixing my tea, hoping that he would not continue whatever he was going to say. "…if there is ever anything I can do for you.."

I slammed down the sugar container with more force than I had intended. I still didn't turn around as I ground out. "You know what I want Harry."

There is was, once again hanging in midair. Swirling in both of our minds and too afraid to say the words. Closure.

It took him a few times to answer and I could hear the emotion thick in his voice. "I…. I'm… I…" Until finally the words came out. "I can't." I turned to him then, looking at his raging emerald eyes laced with despair. I pulled myself back from sinking into them, the flush of anger slowly creeping up my face. "Not yet. Not yet, I can't."

"Why?" I demanded.

"Gin, even though I was gone. It was still you. I never once forgot about you. Or stopped thinking about you or stopped loving you. " I couldn't take this. I refused to break in front of his very eyes. I interrupted whatever it was he was going to say.

"Well that's the problem Harry. You were gone four years. Four years! And that was enough time for me to stop loving you."

There was silence then. It's as if I was plagued with it.

"I think it's best you leave before things get decidedly less friendly between us." I tore my gaze from his. Tears welled up in my eyes. I fought to keep them back until he was gone.

"Do you mind if I Flew?"

I shook my head, not trusting my voice to hide my tears. When the large flash of green and "the burrow" echoed through the apartment followed by nothingness I sank to the ground in my kitchen, holding myself together.

All I wanted was for it to stop hurting.

A/N: What's that? Did I update exactly when I said I was going to?

Hurray for me!

Little FYI. I did not get a chance to edit this chapter. I am stupid busy at work so I don't really have the time. But I did want to get it out here for you to read and enjoy!

Please let me know what you think of the story so far and if you have any suggestions.

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I really really do!

MUAH!

Nurse Holliday