Authors Note: This chapter is just a little interlude that delves into Duncan's personal life that we haven't seen in the last few chapters. Like a deleted scenes chapter. Sort of.

Chapter Nine

Duncan's POV

I ran out after Courtney and couldn't help thinking about the different things that had gone on in the last few weeks. My decisions about Courtney. What I've been doing to keep her happy. How can I do that now? After what just happened.

XXX

A few weeks back

"Mom! You home!" I called to the possibly empty house.

I saw my mom's car outside but she could have gone somewhere with my dad so who knew.

"Duncan, what's wrong? Who's hurt?" she came racing down the steps. I laughed.

"No one's hurt, technically." I told her.

"What do you mean technically? How can you technically not be hurt?" she asked confused.

"It's Courtney, she's_" my mom interrupted me.

"WHAT'S WRONG WITH COURTNEY?" she asked worriedly.

I sighed and just explained everything to her. About how I took Courtney home after practice, when I caught her. Then I told her about taking her home and how she tripped walking to her bed. Then how she got all upset about her wig falling off.

"I hate seeing her upset. And when she fell she pretty much refused to look at me. She made me leave. I think she's afraid that I saw her without her hair." I finished.

"Are you?" my mom asked. We had moved into the kitchen now.

"No, it just scares me that she thinks so little of me." I admitted.

"Well, think about it from Courtney's perspective. This is a girl who has had to go through a lot and still is. She needs someone who is going to stand by her every step of the way through this process." My mom explained.

"I can be that person. I just don't know how. That's why I came home. I was wondering if you could think of anything." I asked her.

She thought for a few minutes and we just sat at the kitchen table while my mom thought.

"I think I have an idea, but I don't know if you're going to like it at all. It will probably make Courtney feel a lot better," she warned.

"Tell me," I pressed. I didn't care what it was that my mom had in mind. I would do anything to make Courtney see that I wasn't scared of her or going to leave.

"It involves your hair." She began.

"I don't like where this is going," I stopped her right there.

"Duncan, your girlfriend is dealing with leukemia and losing her hair and you can't even consider cutting yours?" my mom asked incredulously.

"What you're asking is like asking me to eat a live squirrel. Torture." I said.

"You don't think Courtney isn't being tortured every day? I know you were hoping that I would tell you to go buy her something, but I can't. You aren't going to cheer her up from this by just giving her jewelry. You have to do something personal." She explained. I still wasn't buying it.

"But isn't shaving my head just a little bit too personal?" I pleaded.

"Do you see how scared you are getting over cutting your hair Duncan? I never understood the obsession with your mohawk but do you see how scared you are to get rid of it?" my mom asked.

"Why wouldn't I be scared? I've had this hairstyle for as long as I can remember. It's what makes me who I am. Without it I don't know what I'd do," I explained.

"That's what I am trying to explain to you Duncan. You are scared to cut your hair willingly. Hair that's going to grow back right away. Courtney had to lose her hair without a choice and who knows how long it's going to take to grow back? Can you imagine how scared she is right now?"

I was finally getting it. The words were starting to sink in. My mom was right from the beginning. Courtney is scared about a lot of things right now. I know how she likes to be in control of her life and with leukemia she doesn't really have control of anything. Not to mention she thinks she might lose me because I've seen her without her hair.

"So you're saying that if I want Courtney to see that I'm not going anywhere then I have to show her I care about her in a sentimental way?" I asked. My mom nodded.

"Courtney knows that you care more about your hair than anything. Including her. If you were to get rid of it, I bet she would feel a whole lot better. She'll know that you love her. And I don't mean simple love. Like actual deep, caring, sympathetic love." My mom explained.

"It's a lot to ask of me don't you think?" I asked.

"If you aren't ok with this Duncan you don't have to do it. It was just a suggestion. I'm not forcing you to cut your hair. I know you're scared and worried but have you stopped to think that this decision isn't about you? It's about making Courtney feel better." She said.

"You just want me to do this because you hate my mohawk. You're going to be more excited about this than Courtney." I joked, giving in.

"Does that mean you're going to do it?" my mom asked, trying very hard to cover her excitement. I nodded, she laughed happily. Then she and I split up so she could find an electric razor and I could find a towel.

There were plenty in my bathroom. There was also a mirror. I must have stared at my reflection for a good five minutes. What am I going to look like without my mohawk? If I was this scared about willingly cutting my hair, Courtney must be dying of fear about losing hers.

What would I look like without my hair? I'll bet my princess had to think about that long before me. And worse, she didn't have a choice in the matter.

"Just take a deep breath sweetie. I know this is a big change for you. You'll be okay." My mom assured me when we met back up in the kitchen. I sat down on a chair she had waiting for me.

"I hope so," I replied unconvinced. My mom kneeled in front of me.

"Are you sure you want to do this? No one is forcing you. I'm definitely not going to do this if your aren't completely sure about this. The last thing I want you to do is make a decision like this and not be 100% ready." She said.

"I know. But I don't think this decision is about my happiness. It's about Courtney's. If this is going to make her happy, then I'm going to do it. Making her happy is what's important." I assured my mom.

I saw the change in her face. She went from being concerned with me to being happy.

"That is probably the most mature thing I have ever heard you say. I'm so proud of you," my mom gave me a big hug and was tearing up.

Jeez, I didn't know that she was going to cry. I mean all we are doing is cutting my hair.

"You're going to make Courtney feel much better for this Duncan. You know that right?" my mom asked.

"That's the ONLY reason I'm doing this." I reminded her. She laughed softly and patted my hair.

"Sweetie, you don't understand the effect this is going to have on Courtney's treatment." My mother said and stood up again. Then she moved behind me and wrapped the towel around my shoulders.

Here it comes. I don't know if I can go through with this. I could feel my shoulders tensing up before my mom even started.

This is for Courtney. The girl you love remember? She's scared and sad right now. This is to make her feel better. You can do this.

I closed my eyes in an attempt to shut out the world at the moment.

This is for Courtney. You're trying to cheer her up. You love her. I was repeating this mantra in my head. Screaming it almost. I didn't even notice that my mom was cutting my hair until she tapped my shoulder.

"Duncan, come back to reality dear." She was suddenly in front of me again.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"I'm done." She told me softly.

"I didn't even notice you started." I told her honestly. She didn't say anything else. She just handed me a mirror. I was almost too nervous to look into it. "I look older than sixteen." I commented.

"You look grown up." My mom added. "I don't think you understand how proud of you I am." My mom said and she started crying.

"Why in the world are you crying mom?" I asked laughing. My mom was such an emotional person that it was hilarious sometimes.

"I'm just so proud of you. I mean it's so great that you are leaving that rebellious side of you behind. I'm hoping that this new side of you, the one that cares so much about people, doesn't ever disappear." She said.

"It was always there mom, I just tried to hide it from a lot of people. Anyway, I think I'm going to go change my clothes. Take out my piercings, and find a hat so that I can go surprise Courtney," I explained to her. She released me and stood up.

"Good. Go cheer her up. That girl is probably going to have a heart attack when she sees you." My mom commented. I walked out of the kitchen but turned back around.

"Thanks mom," I told her. Then, to show that I meant it, I picked my mother up and spun her around in a hug.

"Put me down and go to Courtney." She joked.

XXX

That was a pretty crazy day. Thinking back to it, I can't believe I was so nervous. I mean I was attached to my mohawk, but it's just hair.

Although I owe my mom a solid for being there for me.

Okay, so where is Courtney? She's not in a hallway or the cafeteria. Where would she be?

I think I finally know.

I turned a corner and there she was.

AN: I thought this made a little bit of sense. I figured I wanted to show how big of a decision it was for Duncan to actually cut his hair. How it was important for him.