Though I was no longer able to see Haruhi every day, she still appeared often in my dreams. As a result I took to staying up as late as possible, hoping complete exhaustion would mean dreamless sleep. It was a useful habit, since I was looking into some international ventures and the time difference sometimes required late hours.

One night I'd been reviewing bids related to the convalescent home. Even after my eyes were leaden and I'd halted work for the remainder of the night (actually, morning), my tired brain refused to let go of questions about Haruhi. I didn't fall asleep until almost five in the morning.

This would not have been a problem—my staff was accustomed to letting me sleep in—if the host club had not shown up and practically dragged me away to some Expo Tamaki was having fits over.

Once inside, the club ooohhed and ahhhhed over items unfamiliar to our refined lifestyles. I recalled dropping heavily to a bench for a moment's rest, but must have drifted off. I woke now, slumped against the wall, my eyes gritty with sleep. I stood and removed my glasses to rub them clear. Replacing them and getting my bearings, I soon discovered I was at a mall some distance from my house and I had apparently been in such a stupor that I left my wallet and cell at home.

Great. Now I'll have to spend all day among the commoners looking for Tamaki so I can beat him into taking me home.

My stomach reminded me that I had neglected to eat before leaving home as well. Perfect.

Some kid banged into my leg and yelled when I scowled down at him. The ruckus caused people to stare, which didn't bother me since no one of consequence would be caught dead here. But then I heard a voice that froze me in my tracks.

"Kyoya-sempai?" Haruhi asked, disbelieving her eyes. "I…didn't expect to see you here today."

Oh, crap. Alone with her. I drank her in for a moment, then steeled myself. I had to make her believe I was the selfish person she expected.

"Haruhi, how much money do you have on you?" I asked bluntly.

"Huh?"

"I'm quite hungry and I seem to have lost track of both my wallet and the host club…"

"The host…?"

I interrupted her snidely. "Where can we get something to eat?"

"Welll," she looked dubiously at a fast food outlet a few stores down. I led the way to the counter, always aware of Haruhi's gentle presence at my elbow.

I stopped to peruse the neon menu affixed to the ceiling. So garish! But the smell of fried food was sending my stomach into spasms.

"Are you sure this is where you want to eat? There are much nicer restaurants upstairs," Haruhi asked.

I pictured the two of us dining cozily in a sit-down restaurant. So tempting. But I've spent a good many years learning to suppress my impulses when circumstances so required. I'd made my decision to let Tamaki alone pursue her. I wouldn't go back on that now. Even if it meant I had to eat fast food.

A little of my frustration leaked out. "Well, you don't have much money on you, so our choices are limited. Just make sure to get a receipt. I'll make Tamaki reimburse you tenfold." There, let her think about Tamaki coming to her rescue. While I think about strangling him for this…

As the line moved forward, I found myself in front of the register. A perky teenage girl looked across at me expectantly. "Haruhi," I said glancing back to see her looking worried, "I think it's our turn. How do I order?"

She recovered herself quickly and stepped forward, pulling out her change purse. "Here, why don't I order for both of us. Do you know what you want?"

"Anything is fine." My stomach clenched again. "Just be sure to get a lot of it."

I stood back, hands resting in my pockets in a relaxed pose that I hoped would convince my jangling senses to settle down. I watched her, confident in her world, but still appearing delicate and adorable in her pink sweater.

"Coming right up," said the cashier. I felt her admiring eyes on me. "Would you be interested in adding one of our delicious desserts?" She addressed me, pointedly ignoring Haruhi.

I didn't encourage her, but for Haruhi's sake I was polite. "No, thank you, I don't care for sweets."

She kept after me, seeking eye contact so she could flirt. "Before you decide, we have a new shake that's absolutely…"

"I said I didn't want anything," I cut her off frostily, my double meaning clear enough. I left abruptly, sliding into the laminate bench of an empty booth nearby.

Haruhi arrived with the tray of food and sat across from me. I avoided her gaze, keeping my eyes on the double burger she'd ordered for me.

"Kyoya-sempai," she chided, "Just because you're in a bad mood today doesn't give you the right to go around talking to people like that. The poor girl was just doing her job."

"Her job is to serve us food, not irritate me with some weak sales pitch." She sat staring at me with those big brown eyes. To avoid their spell, I took several bites of my burger in rapid succession. I felt her still staring. Was she hoping for a state-of-the-relationship talk or something?

"What?" I demanded.

"Nothing. I was just thinking that you were eating with unexpected gusto." She continued undaunted. "I'm used to you eating in a more refined manner. I'm surprised food like this even appeals to you."

"It doesn't appeal to me in the slightest." Time to put some space between us. "No doubt you'll say I'm callous for admitting it since you bought this tripe." That worked. She broke our gaze abruptly, instead watching the bustling shoppers pass by. She shot me an irritated glance.

Backing off a bit I defended myself by pointing out that the food was intended to be eaten with one's fingers, which of course does not look refined. Seeing her softening, I returned to my previous course. "Besides, it doesn't matter whether I eat in a refined manner or not, since there's no need to worry about how anyone here will view me."

I pushed it further, doggedly reinforcing her image of me…digging my own grave "Hey, for the record, I'm saying it benefits me nothing to keep up appearances in a place like this. And that includes any special treatment I may give you here."

Haruhi looked away again, hurt and embarrassment marring her beautiful face. But she's a fighter, that girl. She defended herself with sarcasm. "Oh, really, I never would have guessed that in a million years."

My lips twitched, suppressing a grin. I quickly shoved the remainder of the fries in my misbehaving mouth, and leaned back to drape one arm across the back of the bench. I kept an impassive expression on my face as I indulged my need for her. My throat grew dry as I watched her moist lips close around the straw of her soda.

"Excuse me," a feminine voice interrupted. "Is this taken?" she asked, eyeing me meaningfully. "And if you're not using this chair, could we borrow it?"

I wasn't interested. The girl I wanted was sitting right in front of me. "Go ahead," I said blandly. The girls gushed and I waited for them to leave. Haruhi seemed puzzled by my cool behavior not only towards her but toward these fangirls.

I was reminded of our conversation from the ferris wheel. No doubt she was thinking of how Tamaki would be basking in the attention of those women—and returning it with interest.

"You're probably wondering how Tamaki and I get along so well even though we're so different." Her eyes grew wide with shock—evidently I hit the nail on the head. Amazing, how our minds work so similarly.

Time to reinforce my image as the self-centered jerk. I leaned forward to stare her down. "The answer is simple-I have something to gain. There is no better motivator than self-interest. I have to look out for Number One, y'know."

"Tamaki-sempai would be heartbroken if he heard you say that," she said in surprise. Always so compassionate…

I took a moment to readjust my glasses as I stuffed down fond images of Tamaki and traced circles on the tabletop. "On the contrary. He's understood our arrangement from the beginning. The same goes for all of them—Hikaru, Kaoru, Honey-sempai, Mori-sempai. We all hang together because it's in each other's interests to do so. Our relationships with each other's families, and the situations that each of us are placed in…" I realized how completely out of her realm all the complicated rules of our social strata must seem. I returned my eyes to hers sheepishly. "Well, let's just say that there's still a lot that you don't know."

I couldn't read the expression on her face. Awe? Shock? Disbelief?

Now that I'd placed myself in the worst light, it was time for me to put forward my friend. This time I let the fond smile escape. "Well, that fool Tamaki sometimes acts when there's nothing in it for him."

I shrugged. "So I guess the point of this is…we are very different creatures, he and I."

Her eyes lingered on mine, assessing, not willing to let go of that piece of my soul she had already seen. I pushed away from the table and moved toward the next display. Fruits, vegetables, cheeses and even lumber samples overflowed from barrels and cases lining both sides of the mall.

"Sempai," Haruhi called as she caught up. "I thought you were going to take a taxi home?"

I should. But I found myself reluctant to leave her side. "I am, but I might as well have a look around first."

Despite my emotional state, my intellectual curiosity was piqued by the display. I wondered if the cost of local produce would be less expensive than bulk wholesale. For certain it would be fresher and therefore probably more flavorful.

At the next booth I was startled to find a pair of earrings set with a rare specimen of black pearls found only in a small island group. I spoke my wonder without thinking. Haruhi looked more closely at the earrings. "How can you tell?"

She sounded a little too admiring. "I've been brought up to know such things," I said with condescension.

Rather than take offense, she followed that thought as we walked on. "So, Kyoya-sempai, why is it after all this time I still know nothing about your family?"

Oh, no you don't. No more peeks at my deeper motivations. You're too perceptive for my own good. "Because there's really nothing for you to know about my family. At least, nothing that would be of interest to you."

"Well, that seems to be a bit unfair, don't you think?"

I stopped in my tracks. Was she reading my mind now? I turned to where she trailed behind me and examined her expression. "Just what do you mean 'unfair?'"

"I mean that when it comes to my personal life you even keep tabs on who my father's friends from work are, while I barely have a clue about yours. So I call that unfair," she huffed.

Point for Haruhi. I deflected. "That's a very intriguing notion, in its own way."

"You've got two older brothers, right? For starters you could tell me something about them. What kind of people are they?"

How did she remember I had two older brothers? I think I mentioned it all of one time, quite a while ago. I thought of my brothers, their achievements, and their position in line to take the helm of the family business. A long time I struggled in their shadows, but now—thanks mostly to Tamaki—I was spreading my wings. Taking risks in my work and my leisure. And it felt good. I didn't envy them their success or their futures.

"They are exceptional men, enough so that they meet Father's expectations without any trouble. And so, even more is expected of the third son." I began strolling the aisle again. Haruhi hung close by and I shoved my hands in my pockets so I wouldn't be tempted to take hers.

"So things are really hard for you, huh?" Haruhi's compassion was chipping away at my resolve to keep my distance.

"You think so?" I said, surprised. "It's kind of a game for me. I enjoy the challenge." Succeeding on my own-without my father's connections as a crutch—pushing myself to see if I could surpass my brothers on my own terms…it was freeing, exhilarating.

She looked into my eyes, trying to read my meaning, waiting for my explanation. I kept silent, watching the expressions play across her dainty features. "I never know what you're thinking," she said with a defeated sigh.