Chapter 13- I Accidentally Break my Life
Grace
I should have expected it, really, I should have. I knew what I had said, and I knew that eventually he would just give up. But regardless of the fact that I had thrown him away, it still stung like a fresh cut when he did it to me. Maybe I had just hoped he would say it to my face, not to his friends, and especially not to Keena Rubycatcher.
I still remembered what had happened, as if it were yesterday and not almost a month ago. I still regretted it. I had just exited the headmaster's office after my trial, and Dylan was standing, right there, under the tree. He smiled and walked over to me.
"Grace," he said, "I heard you got back. Where were you? I was worried…" he blushed as soon as he realized just what he had said, and shoved his hands in the pockets of his new robes.
"Doesn't matter." I mumbled, walking past him, towards the dorms. He ran to catch up with me.
"Yes, it does Grace. Come on, what's the matter? You can tell me," he pleaded, trying to take my hand. I snatched it away from him.
"Just leave me alone!" I screamed. Dylan looked like I had just slapped him. Frost sprouted from the ground around me and began spreading again. I turned and ran for my dorm, an icy blizzard following me.
That wasn't the last time Dylan had tried to reach out to me though, he tried several more times, and I always gave him the same response, the same ice cold "Leave me alone." Eventually he just gave up. All of my friends gave up. I pushed everyone away, Luis, Jaqueline, even Digby. And everyone just left. They stopped saying "Hello" or waving when they saw me, and I migrated to an empty table in the cafeteria, where I could be alone. Dylan still waved when he saw me though, up until about a week ago. I was always unresponsive, because I thought I needed to be alone. Anyways, I thought, who would want to even know the daughter of Malistaire? The teachers watched me closely, and I was utterly miserable.
I turned to school, trying to learn to control the ice storms that seemed to follow me everywhere I went. I studied and I learned but no matter what I did, I found no satisfaction. I became a Grandmaster Thaumaturge, a worthy title and by far the best in my class, and I learned to control my storms, but I was still miserable.
Then I just couldn't take it anymore. I was eating a bacon lunch in the cafeteria, while rereading my favorite spell book, and I selfishly temped myself with a quick glance over at Dylan's table. I hadn't chosen to sit at the table next to them intentionally, it was just the only table ever left unoccupied.
When I saw him, and his friends, just sitting there, talking happily and all eating lunch together as friends, I broke a little inside. I had that, once. I had friends and wonderful people who cared about me, and I might have had Dylan. And now, looking over at them, so happy and content, I wanted to take all of my words back, rewind time, just so that I could sit with my friends again, care free.
I made it up in my mind, right then and there, that I would apologize. It would take time, but I would get my friends back, and would never make the same mistake again. I would never be alone again. Just then, I heard a loud groan from Dylan's table.
"Come on Dylan, she isn't even worth your time," Keena spat. I didn't like Keena, and I disapproved of Dylan being friends with her, but it wasn't like I was in any position to judge the matter. One quick glance though, and I realized they were all looking over at me. I busied myself with a casual bite of my bacon, so they wouldn't know I knew.
"Yeah, didn't she turn you down anyways?" Dylan's Storm friend, Jonathan Skycaller, asked. Yep, they were definitely talking about me. My heart sank.
"Guys…" Dylan muttered. He sighed. "Why do you care anyways?"
"'Cause she's a loser," Keena muttered. I absolutely detested Keena Rubycatcher.
"Keena!" Caleb, Dylan's other friend, snapped.
"You know what? It doesn't even matter. You guys are right." Dylan sighed.
I knew it would happen. I knew what he said was totally justified, but the tears started to flow anyways. I snatched my things and ran from the cafeteria, not stopping until I was in my dorm. I slammed my books down on my desk, and flung myself onto my bed. I cried for a while, and then just lied on my back and looked at the ceiling, trying to pinpoint everything I'd done wrong in the last month.