Previously: Elise and Darcy head over to San Diego and seem to be getting along a little better.

6

Feeling fresh and clean, Elise climbed out the shower and wrapped herself in one the hotel towels. She checked herself out in the giant mirror, made a few silly faces and exited in to her room. Grabbing a set of pyjamas from the closet, she started to head over to the bed. She wasn't looking where she was going, trying to hang on to her towel and simultaneously not drop anything from her arms. She failed to notice the TV remote, lying on the floor, and stepped right on to it turning on the TV.

The TV switched on at full volume to a crime show, just as one of the characters shot a gun. The gunshot rang out loudly through her room. Annoyed, Elise dumped her clothes on to the bed and bent to pick up the offending remote, the towel that had been around her falling off in the process.

Darcy had been typing yet another email to Georgie, in the hopes that this one would elicit a reply from her. He was startled at the sound of a gunshot and as soon as he realised that the sound had emanated from Elise's room, he was jerked into action. He grabbed his handgun from the drawer of his side table and ran to the connecting door, yanking it open from his side, and kicking it down from Elise's.

The sight that met him as he stood in the threshold of her room was definitely not what he had expected. A stark naked Elise was facing away from him with a towel at her feet. She was bending over and reaching for the remote on the floor. The loud volume of the TV meant that she hadn't noticed his entrance, and had yet to realise the eyeful she was giving him. She pressed the red button on the remote, and stood.

"Shit," came a high-pitched voice from behind her.

She turned and her eyes widened as she saw Darcy staring at her his eyes popping and his mouth hanging slightly open. She looked down, to where his eyes were focused on her and realised her state of undress. Grabbing the towel from the floor, she hurriedly tried to cover herself.

"What are you doing here?" she shrieked, her voice shrill. Darcy, still shell-shocked didn't respond and stood rooted to his spot. "Darcy!" Elise was wondering why he was just standing there like and imbecile. "DARCY! GET OUT!" she hollered.

Darcy awoke from his stupor and scampered out the room. Elise, disgruntled and confused, stood there for a minute before she resumed getting dressed, muttering under her breath. "Asshole, yes I realised that, but pervert?"

On return to his room, Darcy sat on his bed, flopped back, and stared at the ceiling. "Shit. Shit! SHIT!" he swore loudly. Elise was obviously not being shot. A bullet wound was one thing he had definitely not seen on her body. And he had seen almost everything. There was no doubt in his mind that the gunshot had not been from her room.

He tried to think of how he was going to explain his presence to her, but his train of thought was continuously disrupted by visions of Elise in all her unclothed glory. His mind was combining them with memories of her in the pool the day he'd fallen in. He pinched his arm hard, trying to wake himself up. He knew he had to explain. And apologise. He hated apologies. There was no way he was going to do it face-to-face. He was thoroughly embarrassed and he doubted she wanted to see him. Also at this point in time, his visions of her were causing another problem.

Finally coming to a decision, he called her room from the hotel phone. Elise was surprised to hear the phone ring. Not having any idea who might be calling, she went ahead and answered.

"Miss Bennet," she heard a deep voice at the other end.

"Yes?" She had initially thought it was the concierge, but the voice sounded familiar.

"About earlier," Elise quickly realised who was calling, and her face heated up as she listened. "Look, I heard a gunshot. It's my job to protect you. I was sure it was from your room, so I had to come in. It's my job."

Darcy was growing flustered. Apologies were not his style, and he was realising that this one wasn't going so well. He was hoping for her to jump in soon. Lucky for him, Elise had pieced together what had happened, realising that he had heard the sound from her TV and that the uncomfortable situation they had been in earlier was not his fault.

"Yeah it's fine. You were right, there was a gunshot noise from my room, but it was just the TV, no big deal," she tried to brush of the situation quickly, her discomfort growing.

"Oh. Well, my apologies Miss Bennet, I uh… I didn't know." Darcy still felt obligated to apologise but he was incredibly uncomfortable and the words fell lamely from him.

Elise snorted, her unease causing her to deflect the situation with humour. "You've seen me naked, I think you can cut the Miss Bennet crap. It's Elise."

"Yes, uh. Okay, then."

Elise had not entirely forgiven him. Although she knew his misinterpretation of the gunshot was not his fault, she recalled that he had stood there staring for a considerable time period. That, combined with his unconvincing apology and the fact that he had not offered her his first name, meant that in her books, he was still an asshole.

"Okay, then. Good night, Darcy," she said, not waiting for a response before she hung up.

At 1 am, Darcy was tossing and turning in bed. He was unable to sleep and his mind kept drifting to the woman who slept on the other side of a single door. The hotel phone suddenly rang, and Darcy, lost in his thoughts, answered quickly, thinking it was Elise.

"Willy!" came an excited squeal from the other end of the line.

Darcy had to bite his tongue to keep himself from swearing out loud in frustration. "Hi Carrie," he responded, unenthusiastically.

He had met Carrie Bingley for the first time when he'd gone on vacation with Charlie's family several years ago. The entire holiday she had spent batting her eyelashes at him and holding on to his arm for whatever reason she could come up with. At first Darcy had assumed it to be a summer crush, but he became nervous when she continuously poked him on Facebook, liked all photos of him, and continuously sent him messages asking if he was 'free any time soon'.

"Oh! It's so sweet that you recognise my voice!" she exclaimed, sounding really excited.

"Uh, not really. It's just nobody else calls me Wi- uh…. that." Darcy couldn't bring himself to refer to himself as Willy. He wasn't even sure how she'd found out his first name

"Oh! It's so sweet that I have a special pet name for you!" she responded, her excitement not diminished in the least.

"Uh, I guess."

"So Willy, I was actually calling to see if you wanted to hang out right now!"

"Actually, I'm in bed right now, Carrie."

"Oh no! You were? Oopsies! Well since, you're awake now, I could always come up there and keep you company!"

"That's okay, I think I'll just go to sleep…"

"Well, ok then, but if you can't hang out tonight, we should definitely do something together tomorrow!"

"Carrie, the thing is, I'm Miss Bennet's body guard and I have to-"

"Oh, I'm sure she can spare you for a little while! She must be such a sweet girl. I mean Francissa Bennet's clothes seem so down-to-earth but also so unique and awesome! I'm sure she and her family are that way too! You know what, I don't even mind if the three of us all hang out together! Although me and you definitely need to chat one-on-one as well."

"Listen Carrie, I need to sleep now and tomorrow is going to be really busy for me… but maybe we can do something… someday?" Darcy tried to appease her so that he could end the call, but in his mind, someday was in some other lifetime. There was nothing in particular wrong with Carrie Bingley, other than her taste for expensive clothes in obscene colours, shades of orange especially. Darcy just couldn't stand her. And what was most unfortunate was that she couldn't seem to take the hint.

"Oh, okay, sure. Sweet dreams, Willy," she said, lowering her voice to what Darcy assumed was supposed to be a seductive tone. He quickly hung up, lay back on his pillow and hoped that she would not feature in his dreams before promptly falling asleep.

At 3am Elise was in the middle of a vivid dream. She was in a laboratory working with a bright blue liquid when suddenly Darcy materialised in front of her. He shot her on the right side of her chest, and as she fell to the floor she shouted "Ha! You got the wrong side! My heart is on the other side!" All of a sudden, the CSI theme tune started to play and the cast of CSI Miami materialised in front of her, with a second Darcy, this one dressed in a black coat with small black glasses. This Darcy leaned forward and plucked the bullet from her chest. She was just about to scream at him that she would bleed out, when a phone started ringing.

Elise slowly drifted into consciousness. She could hear her ringtone playing and she reached over on to the nightstand to grab the phone, briefly casting her eye over the clock and noting the time.

"Hullo?" she said, her voice slightly hoarse.

"EHH-LEEEE!" she heard the shrill voice of her youngest stepsister in response.

"'Lyssa? Whas happening?" she mumbled, still groggy.

"Ellie, I invited some of my friends over and Mom is in San Francisco and Mars and Cari are being sucky so can some of them stay in your room? Please, please, please!"

"Can't they stay in your room? Or the den?"

"They are, but there's not enough spaces. Please Ellie!"

Elise, half-asleep and desperate to shut her sister up, mumbled her agreement and Alyssa quickly hung up, shouting "In here, guys!" Elise drifted back to sleep almost immediately.

When she woke up several hours later, Elise vaguely remembered speaking to Alyssa but had no recollection of the content of their conversation.

On their second day in San Diego, Elise and Darcy walked from apartment to apartment, checking each place out and leaving dissatisfied. Conversation was much more stilted between them. Elise was still very much aggravated by his haughtiness. It worsened when in each apartment he diligently pointed out flaws both to her and to the realtor, complaining about scratches in the paintwork, thin walls, small rooms and so on.

"He's not even going to be living here!" she thought. Each time he made a comment she'd squint at him. He never seemed to notice the withering looks she was shooting him and would continue with his stream of complaints.

What aggravated Elise the most was that he was right. All of the flaws he pointed out were legitimate, and would irritate her were she to live in any of the apartments they had seen.

Darcy was uncomfortable in her presence. He could not bring himself to make eye contact with her and as a result he found him gazing at the floor, the ceilings and the walls of every apartment she considered. In doing this he was able to discover numerous issues with each apartment they saw. He did not hesitate to point them out. In his mind, his observations were welcome. He was even more inclined to point out flaws when these remarks were able to penetrate the somewhat awkward silence between Elise and himself.

When they had finished seeing the last of eleven apartments, Elise and Darcy walked back to the hotel in strained silence. As they entered their rooms, she told him she would be having dinner in and she bid him goodnight. After the considerable amount of walking they had done, Darcy was hungry. He decided to order from the over-priced room service. He contemplated asking Elise to join him for dinner. In fact, he walked to the connecting door and opened it from his side, before deciding he couldn't face her. He turned away without even closing the door.

After ordering a club sandwich and coke, Darcy went to the bathroom to freshen up. He returned to the room and sent a quick text to Bingley asking what time he and Jenine expected to arrive the next day. He had just pressed the send button when he heard a knock at his room door. He assumed it was his dinner and rose to open the door. However when he opened the door, he did not find the server with the table trolley as he expected, but merely the table trolley alone.

"Odd," he thought to himself. He was too hungry to think much further on it and quickly went about wheeling his meal into his room. He was surprised at how heavy the trolley was as well, considering all that was on it. Once he had situated the trolley at the foot of his bed, he turned to close his room door. When he turned back around he saw a head of red hair pop out from under the tablecloth and he shrieked loudly and continuously in horror his panic increasing at the realisation that his handgun was in his bedside drawer, and the table was obstructing his path towards it.

Elise, who had just tucked into her meal, heard Darcy's shriek with surprise. There was no doubt in her mind that it was Darcy shrieking, his voice familiar, and the sound very clearly coming from next door. She looked for a weapon, grabbing her TV remote, which looked like the most dangerous thing in her room. She yanked her side of the connecting door open and found herself in Darcy's room. The scene before her eyes made no sense. Darcy was standing leaned back against his room door with a look of horror on his face. Standing in front of a table of food was a scantily clad Carrie Bingley, dressed in extremely provocative orange feathery lingerie.

"What the fuck, Darcy?" Elise demanded.

"She… she was in my food!" he exclaimed gesturing at Carrie.

Elise glanced at Carrie, who winked at her.

"Oh… am interrupting something?" Elise had absolutely no idea what was going on and moved to back out of the room.

"What? No!" Darcy hollered, unwilling to be left alone with Carrie. "Didn't you just say you needed me for something?" he asked Elise, quickly regaining his senses. Elise opened her mouth to answer but Darcy did not give her a chance to speak. "That's right! You did! You said we had something important to work on! I'm so sorry Carrie, you can't stay," he grabbed her by the arm, "you know security and all that." He quickly whisked her to the door and before she had a chance to fight back, he flung it open, pushed her outside, slammed it shut and fastened the chain.

"Phew!" he side with relief, leaning against the door.

"I'll come back later, Willy!" he heard Carrie announce from the hallway.

His eyes popped at the prospect.

"What the fuck just happened, Darcy?" Elise demanded once more.

"I don't know! I ordered food and she was on my tray!"

"Why did you scream, though? You're a bodyguard! You have a gun!"

"Did you see what she was wearing? And I couldn't reach my gun!"

"Darcy, even if you didn't have your gun you could totally take her! And she didn't look like she was going to attack you anyway."

"I thought she was a giant bird, okay!" he shouted.

"Um… okay?" Elise was still in the dark. She was pretty sure Darcy could take on a giant bird, she'd seen his muscles.

"I have ornithophobia!" he announced, flustered, "and anyway, did you think you were going to save me from an attacker with a TV remote? I'm the bodyguard. If someone attacks you go hide and I'll fight them off! What were you thinking?"

"I was thinking, 'why the fuck is my bodyguard screaming like a girl?'"

"I just told you! I thought she was a giant bird!"

Elise recalled the vision of Carrie in her orange feathery lingerie and snorted. "She did really look like a bird!" she laughed. Her laughter soon escalated into full on hysteria as she envisioned Darcy being attacked by a giant orange bird.

Darcy, at first, sat there gaping at Elise as she laughed until she collapsed onto his room floor.

"I'm just picturing her… pecking you!" Elise struggled to breath she was laughing so hard. Her laughter soon caught on, and although he wasn't entirely convinced of the humour in the situation, Darcy joined in her laughter.

After several minutes they grew too tired to laugh. Darcy clutching his back and Elise her stomach, they looked up at each other and smiled warmly.

Darcy cleared his throat. "Did you maybe want to have the rest of your dinner with me?" He asked, motioning to his table trolley and the food on it, which had somehow survived the ordeal, unscathed.

"Yeah, sure, I just… I laughed too much and I really need to pee!" Elise responded quickly before rushing to her bathroom. Darcy chuckled but the sides of his face were in too much pain for a sustained laugh. He quickly brought her table trolley into his room, wheeling it beside his own.

She returned and sat beside him. Throughout their meal, Elise was assaulted by visions of Carrie as a bird, resulting in her having numerous giggling fits. Darcy kept eying his food suspiciously, inspecting it carefully in case it had been tampered with. He refused outright to drink his coke. Overall, the entire time was passed with silliness. Darcy, nervous that Carrie was waiting outside for him, made Elise push both table trolleys out her room door. He demanded that she latch the door as well.

Elise lay in bed that night with a smile on her face. Darcy was considerably less smiley as he lay there, paranoid that either Carrie Bingley or a large bird would find their way into his room.

A/N:

Sorry for the wait this time! I'm on the move and I'm also out of my secret stock of chapters. Thanks to my lovely beta! -N