_*_*_Sherlock_*_*_
He is moving on and here I will be with my memories for company.
Sherlock thought giving his farewell to John as the doctor left.
How can he move on so easily?
Sherlock asked himself.
Am I so easily forgotten?
His mind was a whirl with different questions. Sherlock was never one to care so much but then again he had never been the one for friends before John. His time away from everyone had certainly been difficult at time but remembering his overall goal made deceiving them easier and most productive in the end.
Will I be able to go on as I did before John?
No…
The second voice was softer but it was still right. John had come along and changed the foundations of Sherlock's thinking and he enjoyed this new side of himself though he wouldn't admit it out loud. No Mycroft would get too much satisfaction if he ever got wind of that information. Sherlock could hear his voice now in full annoyance,
Oh dear brother mine, you are forgetting your purpose. Friends are a distraction and even one with a small amount of intellect as yourself must see the disadvantage. You and I are a unique pair nothing normal will humor us. Even the tedious idea of friends is a hindrance. Sentiment is an unnecessary curse.
Sherlock bared his teeth knowing his brother was correct on some level and it irritate him. To Sherlock John wasn't a distraction but someone to count on, someone who kept him alive.
I would take him as a friend any day, intellect be damned.
Sherlock thought to himself glad of the fact he thought and felt that truly. A soft knock on the door broke Sherlock's train of thought drawing him to the door. Pulling the wood open he was pleased to find Nikki occupying the stair landing.
"A pleasant surprise," Sherlock greeted gesturing for her to enter.
Nikki was dressed in comfortable looking jeans that hugged her body nicely, and a plain purple top peeking out through the folds of the usual purple coat. Nikki's face with flushed from the strong winds foretold in the weather earlier but her eyes were bright and excited.
"I have the day off and since I don't know many people in London I thought I would drop by and visit the one I did know." Nikki explained pulling her coat off and allowing Sherlock to hang it on the hook by the door.
"You caught me at the best of time I have nothing going on at the moment," he told her offering her John's seat while he took his own usual spot.
Nikki eyed him "I don't mean to be rude but do you own any other clothes?" she asked.
Sherlock glanced down at his wardrobe. He didn't look out of the ordinary white button up, black slacks, and black shoes the usual. "What's wrong with this?' he questioned curious.
Nikki frowned "There's nothing wrong it's just every time I see you this is how you are dressed. I'm just wondering if you have anything else or is your closest filled with identical pants and shirts for the next ten years." She explained.
Sherlock snorted "It's either this or a bed sheet," he told her.
Nikki snickered "Might enjoy the bed sheet look," she muttered. Sherlock tilted his head, raising an eyebrow at her and Nikki gasped "My god I can't believe I said that, excuse me I have a tendency of blurting out inappropriate comments sometimes." She said.
Sherlock laughed "I have the same problem," he interjected she smiled warmly, "I really am glad you stopped by." Sherlock told her unexpectedly surprising himself and Nikki as well.
"Really? I would think you wouldn't want to after the fool I made myself out to be." She said.
Sherlock shook his head "Your actions weren't foolish they were defensive whom am I to condemn such behavior. Beside I enjoy your company you do something to me that only one other person has ever done." He said Nikki was silent looking him over.
"And what do you mean by that?" she asked.
Sherlock sighed sitting forward in his chair and folding his fingers together "I consider myself a high functioning sociopath and I don't follow the same rules of the common norm. I find day to day life tedious for most individuals and have no desire to copy them. I find myself cleverer and deviously better than most people. In the recent years I have come to respect and tolerate a simple few whom I consider friends."
"These friends have had to fight tooth and nail to come to the place they are now at and I find that very invigorating. Because of my friends I have come to somewhat of an understanding of the common people and thus I have changed to consider not only other's opinions but feelings."
"That in itself is an amazing feat but what you were able to do the other night seemed the impossible. I spoke to you about my childhood something I have never done not even with my best friend. It was…extraordinary." Sherlock told her, "I have never felt so comfortable with another human being before and I didn't even realize the integrity of the experience until I spoke about it earlier today. And for that I am eternally grateful."
Nikki let him finish staring at him intently and Sherlock feared he had spoken wrongly. She stood slowly keeping her eyes on him "Never in my life have I heard anything like that and I doubt I ever will again," she started her face a blank page before Sherlock.
"You are blunt, and arrogant but I see you are trying to understand the world around you. And the way your eyes light up when you are working is inspiring. I've never met anyone like you Sherlock Holms and I hope I never will." Sherlock's breath caught in his lungs hoping she will continue which luckily for him she did, "You are too strange and unique for there to be a second you." Nikki smiled.
Sherlock was very impressed knowing now full well that John was rubbing off on him. He didn't need to use his deducting skills to see how special this woman was even The Women had never affected him so.
She finds me unique, funny I was thinking the same about her.
Sherlock stood watching her face as she followed him. Eyeing her he detected her heart rate increase by the vein pulsing in her neck, he watched her eyes dilate and her breath quicken. Sherlock closed the space between them stopping inches from her. There was a contrast in their heights so Sherlock had to look down keeping his eyes locked on hers. The faint smell of apples drifted from her hair and Sherlock thought of a summer day.
Tentatively Sherlock moved his hand to stroke her face he had seen John do this exactly thing before and it seem natural. Her skin was invitingly warm and glowed with life.
"What are you waiting for?" Nikki whispered Sherlock pushed hair from her face sending up another waft of apples, "Kiss me already." He smirked before obliging.
Sherlock had very little experience in kissing and frankly the whole process he found very unsanitary but Nikki opened up a whole new world. Her warm mouth was seductive and luscious the intensity of the kiss amplified when Nikki slipped her tongue inside Sherlock's mouth. He felt her tongue working around his own pulling and twisting it. Sherlock felt himself being dragged in by a wave of pleasure. His arms wrapped around Nikki lifting her from the ground she wrapped her legs around him as well as her arms.
Nikki's hands wormed their way into his hair pulling his head back as her lips traveled down his throat causing him to groan loudly, an unusual noise to be coming from the consulting detective. She returned to his lips while her hands kneaded his scalp slowly. Sherlock moved forward until Nikki's back hit the wall.
Using the steady structure for support Sherlock's hands were free to do their own exploring. The soft tangles of her hair felt like liquid in his fingers as he traveled over her body.
Nikki's hands found his, their fingers interlocked, and Sherlock had the urge to pin them above her head so he did. Nikki pulled from their passion, panting. Sherlock eyed her nervously keeping her arms held firmly. She searched his face before a smile formed on her mouth Sherlock was relieved and moved in for more kissing. He release her hands pressed more firmly against her. Nikki was busy pulling on his shirt while Sherlock slipped his own fingers underneath hers. His hands stroked her stomach loving the movement of her skin as she pulsed against him.
Nikki pulled away again pressing her forehead into his breathing heavily her eyes filled with lust "Sherlock," she breathed he enjoyed the way her American accent played with his name when she said it, "We need to slow down." Nikki told him.
His whole body wanted nothing more than to give into its natural urges but his mind saw sense in her words. Slowly he lowered her to the ground keeping her pressed to the wall.
Her eyes were fixed on him cooling by the seconds "For someone who claims to be above the rules of the common norm you seem rather experienced in it," Nikki said smiling.
Sherlock chuckled at that planting a quick kiss on her mouth before stepping back. "Believe me when I say I am as surprised as you," he spoke honestly tucking his shirt back into his pants.
"Now I believe you when you say you are pleased to see me," Nikki teased Sherlock smiled stroking her cheek with his fingertips.
She smiled softly "So Mr. Holmes what have you been doing since the last time I saw you?" she asked taking John's seat as if nothing had occurred Sherlock was mildly impressed but kept his expressions neutral as he returned to his own chair.
"I have been waiting for my next case but things have been slow no interesting cases have come to my attention," he sighed Nikki smirked.
"Oh I bet some have come but none to your satisfaction." She laughed he couldn't help but smile.
"I had a few love affairs, some political corruption, and the usual day to day nonsense all I was able to solve within minutes without even leaving my seat." Sherlock told her.
"And when you're not being bored by day to day nonsense?" she asked he eyed her thoroughly.
"I've been sitting being bored with being bored. London has changed since I came back its wild nature has been subdued." Sherlock replied sighing heavily rotating in his seat so his long legs dangled over one of the arms.
"You speak as though you are disappointed," Nikki said.
Sherlock closed his eyes for a moment "Everything here has changed while I was gone and I can't help but think coming back might not have been the thing to do." He spoke not thinking of the city at all but the people within it.
"Maybe it's not the city that has changed maybe it's you." She suggested.
Sherlock looked at her, "What do you mean?" he questioned wanting more clarification.
Nikki frowned thinking for a moment even sitting forward in John's chair "I haven't know you long but I have a feeling that you are different than who you were before your leaving but you would have to confirm that yourself." She explained Sherlock frowned jumping to his feet and began to pace.
_*_*_Nikki_*_*_
She watched him moving back and forth, her eyes following his movement with some satisfaction.
What have I gotten myself into?
Nikki asked herself again. The last couple of weeks that she had known Sherlock had become the high light of her new life in London. None of her visits had ever been tedious and she was getting all the information that she was hoping for. Oh he was indeed as clever as she had been told but nothing could have prepared her for him.
She smiled to herself thinking of the coming weeks and how they would pan out for the consulting detective.
Oh my dear Sherlock the fun we will have!
_*_*_Sherlock_*_*_
Why did I even listen to her?
Sherlock scolded himself. Several nights had passed since Nikki's last visit and her cryptic analysis that left Sherlock's mind even more of a whirl.
Damn her! And damn these thoughts!
He berated throwing himself onto the couch. Sherlock stared at the ceiling before rolling on to his stomach burying his head in a pillow.
Have I really changed?
Yes…of course.
Before or after the fall?
Before…
John?
Absolutely…
Sherlock groaned though it was muffled by the pillow and didn't voice his true anguish. These broken thoughts had been plaguing him and it was infuriating! What were they supposed to mean?
That you are a complete git,
John's voice chimed in.
"Not now John," Sherlock hissed still pressed into the pillow.
You had your alone time Sherlock! You know when you faked your own death!
John's voice persisted.
"How long are you going to use that tactic, getting a little stale don't you think?" Sherlock questioned grumpily feeling the familiar guilt flooding his system.
You'll be hearing about this for the rest of your life!
"Then I should have stayed dead," Sherlock blurted out before sucking in a breath over the realization of what he had said,
Now we both know how you really feel,
Even though John wasn't truly in the room Sherlock felt overwhelming regret over his words "I didn't mean that," he spoke truthfully, "I never wanted to leave in the first place,"
I don't believe that,
"But it's true," Sherlock urged knowing full well that he was talking to himself, "If I had stayed would things have been different?" he asked suddenly not sure what he was going on about.
What do you mean?
"With us? With you and me?" he asked timidly not really sure where these questions were coming from.
You mean that if you had stayed would I have met Mary, then yes we would have stayed together doing what you do best and I wouldn't be getting married.
The John voice sounded exasperated and quickly faded away. Sherlock grew suddenly very irritated grabbing the pillow under his head and threw it at John's chair.
"And there you go doing what you do best." He muttered to himself.