Happy 8th March ladies! And guys! (haha)

Here's the chapter. Anyway, I should be putting song parts soon, but in my own native language, so that should be fun, if you guys want to read Serbian (good luck with that), because we all know how bilingual fiction as rare, especially if writers aren't using Google Translate.

Time goes by… so slowly…

I sang in my bed, quietly as ever. I don't know if my voice could be even counted as whisper.

I hadn't slept. I couldn't. I missed the warm body of Ron. I missed his 'goodnight' in the evening and 'good morning' at the beginning of the day. I also hadn't slept because the tears never stopped falling. They never quit running. They leapt from my eyes like lava from a volcano. They were hot, they were cold and didn't stop at all.

I wanted to go to Ironhide so many times, but I felt so horrible, just so distrustful.

I got up from my bed and into the bathroom so many times I couldn't count anymore. Had everything just fell to waste because of a stupid accident? There wasn't even no tongue involved. And thank God there wasn't. That would have been horrible.

I put my palms on the end of the sink, and raised up my head to see my reflection in the mirror.

I was shocked with what I saw. Who-what I saw wasn't me. I don't know. There was this depressed, ugly person in front of me. Big, round, black circles traced under my eyes, tiny scratches of the explosion on my face…

I touched my face, lips and nose. It was me, but so… so different.

Do you know how scary it is to see your reflection and not recognize yourself? It's very scary. My hair was unkempt, strands of hair sticking out, the once straight hair now curly. How was I going to brush this?

I took a hair brush from the cabinet and started to brush the hair. It was hard to get the comb through it, so I just gave up. Other times I would have actually bothered to brush, but now… I felt like giving up completely.

I got out of the bathroom, there wasn't much to do there anyway. It was very early in the morning, the birds were chirping outside as the sun shone.

This was unfair. It wasn't supposed to be a sunny day and the birds shouldn't be chirping. Look at me! I don't even recognize myself in the mirror!

I plopped down on the couch. I waited for someone, anyone to come, but nothing. Nobody. I guess we really are alone in this world, aren't we?

Because I hadn't slept, I felt like crap now, tired to the limit, but I can't sleep. The silence was the one thing that soothed me. No one was judging, giving me strange looks, but deep inside, I was hurting, because I allowed the accident to happen.

Okay, maybe I didn't, but in a way, I feel guilty. Very guilty.

Another tear slid free as I wiped it away aggressively. I was sick and tired of this. This week I almost died, Nicole almost died. I haven't heard from my Uncle, and I doubt he knows what happened. Optimus must have gotten that report he wanted. He and his damn report.

Where the hell was Ironhide then? Why hadn't he told Optimus what happened? I told him all of that years ago!

I got up from the couch and started circling around the living room. I can't turn on the TV, it'll wake up Nicole. I'll go stuff myself with ice-cream. Simple as that.

Opening the freezer, I found ice-cream, but it wasn't either of my favorite flavors, raspberry or chocolate. This was vanilla. I like vanilla, but it's still not my number one ice-cream flavor.

I took it out and grabbed a spoon from the drawer. I got back to the couch and opened the cap aggressively, venting out a little. This was stressing, exaggerating and it wasn't nice. At all. I probed the frozen vanilla, trying to chop it down to little pieces so it would melt faster. I was sitting Turkish style, not that it was helpful in any way.

Some time must have passed, because I ate the more than half of the ice-cream and Nicole woke up.

"Mel?" she said, as she blinked a couple of times and then rushed to me. "Mel, what happened? Why are you so..?"

"So ugly? Desperate? Heartbroken? Say it out loud I don't care." I groggily said as I took another spoonful of ice-cream, earning myself a brain freeze.

"What?" was all she said, before I gripped my head.

"Ah, brain freeze!" I screamed, leaning up front and crashing on the ground. "Ow, my elbows!" I screamed again.

"Is it bad?" Nicole asked with caution.

"Of course it's bad!" I really screamed again, and Ron bolted into the dorm.

"What's going on?!" he roared. Well, he just raised his voice a bit, but when he said it, it was like thunder striking. He saw me bawling on the floor and immediately got by my side as the brain freeze had already passed, but who knows where this is going to take me if I fake it.

"She has a brain freeze." Nicole said from the couch. "Hey, where's the remote?" I heard some commotion on the couch, but paid no mind to that.

"Ow…" I whined, even though my head didn't hurt me anymore.

"How do you treat this 'brain freeze'? Is it serious? Need I call Ratchet? If your brain functions stop to-"

"Chill, Ironhide, brain freeze comes and goes. It's caused by eating cold foods. She'll be fine." Nicole said as the TV turned on. "Hey, Bee! Come see this! It's NASCAR!" she yelled for him as he came appeared into the room and closed the entrance to the dorm, since Ron left it wide open when he bolted in.

He sat beside her, resting his arm on her shoulders as her head descended onto his chest. He gave her forehead a kiss before returning his attention to the TV.

"I see you're fine." Ron frowned, as I caught myself staring at Bee and Nic.

"Oh." I said. "Yeah, I'm fine." I smiled at him. He didn't do as much as blink. We had a little staring contest but I blinked and he got up. "Hide-", I started, but he immediately disappeared. I sighed as I rubbed my eyes to prevent the tears.

"You okay?" Nicole asked as by my side appeared Bumblebee with a helping hand offered to me. I took it as he lifted my up easily, giving me a smile. I nodded in thanks.

"No, I'm not okay. I'm going to have a talk with Ironhide." I said as I walked out of the dorm, closing the door behind me and going for the parking lot. As I got down the small stairs I approached the truck and stood in front of it.

It didn't do as much as… well, anything. He played a truck. "Hide…" I felt so weak, insecure, frightened. I walked to the door. It didn't even click open. I pulled the doorknob, but it was locked. I pressed my cheek and hand on the window. "Hide, please…" I gently said, and I know that with this voice, he couldn't not unlock the door.

So unlock the door he did. It clicked open as I got in the back of the cab. I closed the door behind me.

"Hide…" I kept calling him 'Hide', because he was my teddy bear, and I certainly hoped he still was. Ron flickered into existence with a frown on his face, on the other side of the cab in the backseat with me.

I sighed deeply. "Hide, I made a terrible mistake."

"You don't say?" he said in such a cold way it sent shivers down my spine. He was never like this with me.

"It was an accident and I didn't mean for it to happen, but it just did and-"

"And what?" he cut me off emotionlessly. I felt tears in the corners of my eyes.

"I'm not proud of it, but I just want to say that-", I sighed, "I'm sorry." I honestly said. I hoped he had forgiven me. I hadn't said many words, but those that I did say, I did mean.

"You can't change what has already happened, so don't waste your time trying to undo it. Move on, let go and get over it." He coldly said. I think the accident dug deep into his heart-spark, whatever. I tear slid free from my eye. He was acting like I was just another stranger on the street or an enemy. Two very different things, I know, but it didn't make it any easier, knowing he wouldn't accept me back.

"Why are you so cold?" I weakly said, my voice was going weak, my throat tightening itself, wiping the tear mark on my cheek and looking at him with watery eyes.

"Were you so different?" he dismissively said.

"You think it was easy for me?!" I snapped as he only blinked, "It was an accident and you weren't there! You didn't even let me explain!" I pointed a finger at him.

"I didn't have to. I saw everything."

I doubted that, if he had, we wouldn't be having this conversation right now, "Really? Everything?" I tilted my head in doubt.

"Yes." He confidently said. I hated him for having so much confidence in himself. Not that it was a bad thing, but he could be just so damn convincing if you didn't know the truth.

"Even the fall?"

"What fall?" his brown knitted in confusion. I got him.

"See? You haven't seen half of it. You're making conclusions too quickly." I told him honestly.

"What fall?" he sternly repeated. I don't know if I should get used to this kind of unfriendly treatment.

"Before he fell on me, it was because I lost my balance." Okay, that sounded stupid, but it's the truth. "I don't know what happened to the room."

"Nicole and Bumblebee were… playing."

"Sam was trying to help me, but I fell, and as he tried to grab me from falling, I pulled him accidently and you know the rest. It was an accident, Ironhide, and you know I'd never do anything to hurt you nor betray you." I told him with much honesty and love, taking his hand gently into mine.

The touch softened him, I could tell he needed it as much as I did, "I… suppose."

"Five years from now, when I look back, I don't want to see something like this that ruined us."

He hardened, "There is no us."

"There has to be." It was a mix of a statement and a plea, "There always was and always will be." I hopefully smiled. He inhaled sharply.

"No." he sighed, "Don't."

"Come on, Hide, don't you trust me? You're my teddy bear." I smiled. He didn't reply as his hand went stiff, and then he retracted it. My face fell, heart pumped faster, I sat frozen and I was barely breathing.

"I may not be your…" he searched for the words, slowly tracing his eyes around the truck and then they fell onto mine, his beautiful, blue eyes. Oh how I missed them. "I may not be your… teddy bear, anymore, but I am still your guardian. I will continue to fulfill my duty."

He disappeared into thin air, leaving me flabbergasted, unmoving and just wanting to die, then and there.

It was done.

It was over.

We were over.

Short chapter much? Awesome cliffhanger. I am a genius. Boy, I need to slow things down. ;)

Just one thing. Or two. Or more.

The point of what I wanted to say here, is that, you haven't read these +35 chapters to see Mel and Nic get buried and rescued. Oh no. There is so much more in plan, let me tell you that. Things you haven't imagined will be here. Which is one of the reasons, if I find the time and patience, why this story may reach 50 chapters. Or more.

So I need your reviews all the time, because, you don't even know it, but they give me ideas. Of course, I love it when you say, 'great, upload soon, more, etc.' but what I really want to read in your review is, what you want to happen next. What you think will happen next.

I got a couple of reviews earlier, and those reviews gave me excellent ideas. Those ideas may last 20 sentences in a chapter, but I am grateful that you put your two cents in. What you expect to see, though I hate disappointing people, what you would write, how would you continue this story, and a bunch of other things.

That's what reviews are really about. Giving your piece of mind in that one small box at the end of each page.

QUESTION OF THE CENTURY: What do you think, how did I capture the Transformers personalities? Are they off, are they nailed, what do you think?

*Remember to praise and scold in your review! :D (JK, praise only ;) )

Celebration time! I got to +150 chapters! Preview (only this time):

"Why are you so cold to Melissa?" she asked him.

"Will you not interfere? It is none of your business." He crossed his arms.

"I will interfere! She's my best friend and I don't want some alien here, hurting her! Damn it, Ironhide, do you know what she did to herself?!"

His eyebrows joined, "No. What?"

"She… you should see for yourself. Look, point is, Melissa is the most loyal person we know. She'd never betray you, she'd never do that and you know it."

Hmmm…. Wonder who said this?

QUESTION OF THE MONTH: (because I'm thinking of writing moar fics :3 )

-Who's your favorite character? And why?

-And what's your favorite pairing? (can be slash, TF/OC, anything)HH