well, I can't say that Lianshi wasn't a little bit influenced from Miss Vovo's portrayal in her Ling Tong/Gan Ning fic, hehe. But I do certainly see her as a little silly and could be a little wild when she's not on duty.
Plus, I love humor like this!
Enjoy!
Chapter Three
The only thing Lianshi was concerned with was the fact that she missed the wedding.
Sun Quan looked at her in shock.
"Stop encouraging them!" he yelled.
She giggled, and waved her hand dismissively.
"Come now. Even Zhou Tai agrees. Right?" she said.
But Zhou Tai wasn't paying attention. Instead, he was staring at Sun Quan's pectorals. The ones that were sticking out of his shirt.
And that reddish brown hair, that almost looked violet.
And those bright green eyes...
"Hey!" Lianshi yelled, snapping her fingers.
"Huh..?"
Zhou Tai turned a deep red, when Lianshi gave him a knowing look, and gave her trademark giggle.
No, it wasn't just a giggle. He was screwed.
And Lianshi had just caught him in the act. No way would she ever let it down.
Besides, she had to redeem herself. She wanted to hook up Ling Tong and Gan Ning, but Lu Meng beat her to the punch.
She's still angry about that.
Angry and unforgiving, she ordered the maids to give him raw meat and cheap village beer for a week.
Plus, she removed his seat from the dinner table, and gave him a child's table.
And so she grinned at Zhou Tai. Her beautiful eyes darting back and forth between him and Sun Quan, a lightbulb going off in her head.
"Oh would you look at the time...I told Lady Shangxiang I would meet her down by the lake for some fishing. See you two later!"
She rose from her seat by Sun Quan's throne, and left the throne room.
Leaving Zhou Tai and Sun Quan alone.
And before she left, she locked the doors and threatened to murder anyone who dared interfere.
"My word, Lady Lianshi, you're ruthless!" Daqiao said with a laugh.
"Just making up for lost time..." she said, flipping her hair as she walked down the hallway.
It was an awkward atmosphere in the throne room.
Both men stared at each other, then looked away once the other took notice.
Then they did it again, until Zhou Tai gasped and said,"Wait a second! Lianshi is allergic to fish!"
Sun Quan's eyes grew wide, and they both ran to the door, only to find it locked and bolted by the outside.
"Hey! Hey!" Sun Quan yelled, pounding on the door.
Zhou Tai went for the sword he always had by his hip, only to find it gone.
"She took my sword!" he yelled.
Once again, Sun Quan's eyes grew wide, mouth agape, when he began to pound on the door again.
"Lianshi..she tricked us!" he yelled.
"Help! Help!" they both yelled, pounding the door again, while Daqiao twirled Zhou Tai's sword, and whistled down the hallway.
"I can't believe you did this without my consent!" Lianshi yelled at Lu Meng, when they all entered Ling Tong's room.
The room was a mess. Glass was all over the place, carpet was ripped up, holes in the wall, the mattress as flipped over, and Ling Tong's clothes drawer was tipped over on its side.
Clothing was also scattered all over the room, along with some tiny blood splatter on the wall.
Gan Ning held another handkerchief to his nose, bleeding again because of Ling Tong's fist.
Lianshi crossed her arms and said,"I should finish you for this. Luckily Sun Quan likes you."
"Uh..how exactly did you find out?" Lu Meng asked.
"Help?" Ling Tong asked, as Gan Ning's nosebleed had finally finished, and he let his hand run shamelessly up Ling Tong's thigh.
"I overheard Gan Ning ask Ling Tong to
consummate the marriage, and Ling Tong was complaining about the ring he had on, so I put two and two together." she replied.
"And how did you assume I was responsible?" Lu Meng asked,"for all we know, it could have been Taishi Ci. Or Ding Feng, or even-"
Lianshi wagged her finger,"Taishi Ci never leaves Sun Ce's bedroom. And Ding Feng is always in mine.."
Lu Meng looked on in disgust.
"I did not need to know that!" he yelled, suddenly getting the image of a very naked Ding Feng in between crimson sheets.
"Think sexy thoughts...think sexy thoughts..think sexy thoughts.."
Then an image of Lu Xun appeared in his mind.
"Damn it!"
"Hey..hey..a little help here?" Ling Tong asked, when he found his neck bitten by Gan Ning.
"And what about Zhou Yu? It could have been him!" Lu Meng yelled, finally returning to reality.
Lianshi only giggled.
"Zhou Yu is currently looking for the strongest tree to hang a noose from." she replied.
"Uh..a noose?" he asked.
She nodded.
Then they both gave each other a knowing smile and said,"Xiaoqiao."
But that smile quickly faded, once they began to argue again.
"Why wasn't I invited?" she asked.
"Honestly, I didn't even know anything about it. They came into my room screaming about it the other day. I mean..I guess they got so drunk, they didn't know they got married." he said.
For a second, she was confused. But then she realized he was playing coy.
She may have known the true story-that Lu Meng and Lu Xun kidnapped the two and got them married at a 24/7 chapel, but that didn't mean they had to know.
They'd just keep telling the lie.
"Rape! Rape!"
Lu Meng and Lianshi looked over on the bed(that had somehow been put back together)to find Gan Ning on top of Ling Tong, nibbling on his neck, as he tried putting his hand down Ling Tong's pants.
Instead of helping, Lianshi turned red and giggled like a schoolgirl.
Lu Meng, on the other hand, struggled to rip them apart.
"Oh no you don't!" she yelled, diving at Lu Meng. She missed, and flew over the bed, almost hitting her head on the wall.
Her skirt flipped up, giving the three a view to die for.
Black panties, and an ass that just won't quit!
Gan Ning clenched his fist, holding his hand back, holding back the urge to slap her ass.
Instead, Lu Meng took care of that.
Jokingly, he tapped her bum lightly, causing her to spin around and slap Lu Meng so hard, he fell to the floor.
That was when Lu Xun arrived.
And everything had occurred before his innocent eyes; Gan Ning molesting Ling Tong, Lianshi diving at Lu Meng, Lu Meng slapping her ass, and Lianshi slapping his face.
"Uh..."
"Hi Lu Xun!" everyone said.
"Uh..I think I should-"
He backed away.
"No! No! Stay here for a while!" Ling Tong said. Hopefully..Gan Ning wouldn't dare go further with Lu Xun around, right?
Right?
Before Ling Tong could blink, Gan Ning had him against the wall, ready to molest him once more.
"HELP!" Ling Tong yelled.
Lianshi gasped, and covered Lu Xun's eyes, pushing him out of the room.
Then she rolled Lu Meng's body out of the room.
And sat on the floor cross legged, watching the boys with a wide, hopeful smile.
"Lady Lianshi! You're the Empress, you're supposed to be saving your husband's warriors from this kind of stuff!" Ling Tong yelled, his words drowning in Gan Ning's kisses.
"First off, Sun Quan and I are best friends, we only got married because he didn't trust any other woman to become his Empress, and Lady Shangxiang couldn't be chosen."
"Second..I didn't tell you two to stop!"
Gan Ning and Ling Tong looked at her in surprise.
Who knew their Empress was this wild?
They had always seen her as calm, if not stern around the castle, and within the court.
Charming, happy, always smiling, giving a listening ear, a tight hug, a warm meal.
But behind doors, she was a real hell raiser.
It couldn't be helped. Gan Ning wanted Ling Tong, who wanted Lianshi's help, who wanted to watch.
Ling Tong turned his head.
"Hey! Did you hear that? Lady Lianshi, Lady Shangxiang is calling you!"
Lianshi rose up from the floor.
She gasped and said,"What? The Princess is calling me?!"
"Yeah, and it sounds urgent!" he yelled.
Gan Ning tried to protest, but he was met with Ling Tong's fist.
"But I don't..hear-"
"Go, go Lady Lianshi, you don't want to make the Princess wait!" Ling Tong yelled.
"Right away! I'm coming, Princess!" she yelled, fleeing the room.
But not before stepping on Lu Meng's face.
Yes, Lu Xun stood outside Ling Tong's bedroom with Lu Meng's unconscious body, just admiring how he looked when he slept.
"That's creepy, man.." Ling Tong said, as he managed to flee Gan Ning's hold.
He ran in the opposite direction, before Gan Ning could get up, and chase after him.
Meanwhile, in the throne room, Sun Quan and Zhou Tai finally broke free from their prison, and ran head first into Ling Tong, knocking him down.
..thus leading him right back to Gan Ning.
Ling Tong facepalmed.
This day just couldn't get any worse.