Title: Should Be Hopeless (But We're Happy)
Words: 2118
Pairing: Laurel/Oliver
Genre: angst/comfort
Status: Done
Summary: Laurel has to make a big decision and it's clouding her judgement. Oliver calls it out and they get some unexpected results of that fight.
Laurel sat a computer in the middle of the foundry and she stared at the screen. He watched her do that for about an hour. He wondered what was going through her head, but she seemed busy. She seemed busy and that was enough to keep her. Sara didn't say anything. Felicity didn't say anything. Diggle and Roy didn't say anything. And he learned his lesson a couple of weeks ago that if Laurel didn't want to broach something, he needed to let her come in her own time
They went out into the field and she definitely felt distracted. This was a huge honor. It was a big promotion. It meant a lot of strings attached though. She went through the motions without focusing on the fight.
Sara saw her telegraphing moves and she knew the goon that Laurel kept fighting off saw it too. She couldn't get in between them though.
Oliver looked over as Laurel opened herself up to a right cross in the face and some knees to the chest. Shit. He went over to her side and got the goon off of her. "What the hell, Laurel? That guy should have been a piece of cake," He exclaimed.
She was a much better fighter than that guy. "Yeah," She brushed him. "Just a surface wound. Don't worry. I'm in it now." She told him as she picked herself up off the ground and brushed herself off.
"You sure?" He asked.
Laurel narrow her eyes at him. "I'm fine,"
The rest of the night went pretty reasonably. Dr. Moreau, the mad scientist hellbent on the singularity who was testing on the fresh patients he got from the psychiatric ward, Laurel took out with her canary cry and he made sure that the guy was knocked out. The police arrested Moreau and they left right the way they came in and went back to the cave.
"Felicity, Diggle, Roy, movie, my treat," Sara said as she hurried them out of the foundry so they could leave Laurel and Oliver alone. "Don't kill each other." She said as she closed the Foundry and let the two of them together.
"Are you gonna talk to me about what happened tonight?" Oliver asked her as he stood on one end and she sat in a chair opposite him.
She shook her head. "Not really no."
"Well, I do," He told her, more sternly. "You were distracted tonight. You could have gotten yourself killed."
She sighed. "Ollie, it's handled. I'm not dead. Okay? I'm standing right here with you, very much alive." She told him as she shuffled some paperwork and looked anywhere but him.
"What the hell is wrong with you? You act like you don't care about your own life. Now alcoholic Laurel who had to deal with the fact that she might be more damaged than she thought might have had that disregard for her life, but not you." He yelled as he slammed his fist on the table.
She groaned. She hated him when he got on his high horse like this. "Believe it or not, I wasn't disregarding my life. And you need to stop bringing it up." She said as she sat down and held her head in her hands, fighting with him did not make this decision easier.
"What are you hiding, Laurel?" He asked in a quiet voice.
Loud failed so now he tried something different. She spun the chair around and looked him in the eye. She sighed. "I got a job offer from the Governor. Policy director."
"You got a job offer?" He asked her. "That's great news. You love working for the city. And this could mean you could affect real change, right?" His eyes searched hers for what was wrong, because he truly couldn't understand why this would bring her down.
"It should be great news. This is everything I ever wanted. I could make a difference. I could be the governor's side and fight for the little guy. This should be the perfect job. I shouldn't even be thinking twice about this," She said as she covered her eyes with her hands and slid them down.
Clearly, something about the whole thing bothered her. "Should. That comes with a but normally," He said in an even voice.
"It'd mean," She said as she took his hand in hers. "I'd have to give this up. Give us up."
"What?" He asked. He almost couldn't believe she said it. This was keeping her. He was keeping her. She wanted this so badly that it made her stomach knot. He knew she wanted to affect change even before he'd gotten on that boat and gotten lost near China for five years.
He absently rubbed the back of her hand and her lips turned up at the action. "Taking the position would mean that I move from Starling to the capital and it would mean, we couldn't be a thing anymore." She told him as she looked him in the eye.
Her love for him never changed. Not in the years he knew her. She could be angry with him and she still loved him. She wished it wasn't that way. It would have made the job of deciding that much easier. Especially because the team was supportive if she wanted to leave them. This job seemed like it was perfect. Fighting for the little guy, though, this job would make him an enemy in the public's eyes. "What do you want to do?" He asked.
"You're gonna stay here. You're gonna fight the good fight. I know we haven't been in the best place the last couple of weeks, but I want to stay here with you." She told him.
That surprised him. He didn't actually expect her to stay with him. "Look, Laurel, I don't want you to regret this. This is a really big opportunity for you."
She nodded to him. "It is. But I want to stay."
"If you're doing this because of me," He didn't know what to say to her. They were crazy for each other. They loved each other, but he knew that they were always going to have fights. "You know it might not last between us?" He asked her.
She looked in his eyes and took his hand and put it over her heart. "It's never gonna be the same without you. It beats because I know you." She told him.
That wasn't true. Her heart would beat without him. "You don't even know how long any of us have in this game. I could be dead tomorrow." He told her and even then he felt his resolve weakening. It felt pretty good to have someone who was fighting for him, with him, totally with him.
She chuckled a little at him. "No one ever knows how long they have left. I'd rather spend the time I have with you." She told him. "Besides, I'm making a difference right now."
"So you're sure about this decision?" He asked her and looked into her bright twinkling amber eyes. "I don't want you to pick me and then resent me down the road. I want this to be for you."
She nodded to him and laid her head on his chest. She closed her eyes for a minute and sighed. "I love you, Oliver Jonas Queen. This is my decision. I made it. I'm sticking to it. It's not because of you. You're just an extra perk. Besides, maybe I'll get out of law altogether and start helping the little guy in a very real way."
"Oh yeah?" He asked. He hadn't heard that she would do that. That marked a big change in her. Laurel loved law like humans needed air, water, and sustenance.
She moved her head against his chest and smiled. "I'm think Queen Consolidated needs a new charity foundation."
"I should take that up with Mom, but you'd be our first candidate if we did something like that." He told her as he cradled her head in his hands. This was his girl. This was the girl that never gave up on him despite all odds. The girl that should have given up on him. The girl that never stopped believing him, even when everyone else did. This was the girl he was in love. "You know, I love you too, right?" He asked her as he looked down at her.
She looked up at him. Her eyes looked up and sparkled at him. "Yeah?" She asked him as her face broke out into a grin.
"Yeah," He told her as he smiled back to her. "I cause you so much pain. I'm not good for you. I'm not good, period. But all I want to do is be with you for as long as I live, at least right now, because we don't know how long we have, that matters right?" He asked her.
She grabbed his hand and held it with a determination in her eye and her lips turned up. "It's all that matters," She told him. "Let's go home," She said as she dragged him out of the cave.
"How much you wanna bet they're gonna think we had sex on the tables?" He asked her.
She cracked and laughed out loud. An undignified laugh that mussed her hair and reddened her cheeks and made her wheeze because she was out of breath. A laugh that would taste good on his tongue. He didn't joke with a great many people and when he did it felt important.
He picked a smile to put on his face too. "What, you don't think so?" He asked as they took the stairs and got out of the building. He got in her car and she gave him the keys.
"I think they'll definitely ask you. They all think I can't take that kind of joke." She said with a laugh and then she was sad.
He took her cheek in his hand and smiled at her. "Hey," He said, "They don't know you like I know you. They just need a little time with you. They all love you, they just need some time to adjust."
"Honestly, I'm surprised they let me on the team so easily. They all seem really welcoming." She said as she rested her cheek on the cool glass of the window.
He drove out of the employee lot and smile. "It's because I made them."
She looked to him and smiled as she put her hand on top of his on the gearstick, a way of thanking him for making her feel welcome, for helping her make that decision she had to make tonight.
They stopped in her parking lot in front of her building and he looked up to the windows. "So, we're here." He told her.
"We are here," She told him as she looked at her glove compartment and wondered how the night was going to end. She looked up to him and then down at her hands, once, twice, and then on the final time, she smiled. "Do you want to come in?"
"I'd like nothing more," He said as he opened the door and watched her open the passenger door. She took her keys out of her pocket and allowed them in.
He cooked dinner and she sat on the couch and waited for him. This was exactly what she would have wanted the day before he got on that boat. She couldn't think about the other things that were gonna be a part of their lives, all she could think is how tiny their love was back then.
He brought her dinner and she smiled as she shoveled it into her mouth and they watched some silly tv show about a superhero and his longtime friend/girlfriend.
Eventually, their plates ended up on the coffee table and her eyelids drooped. "Come here," He said as he opened his arms. She settled on his chest and side and he wrapped around her.
After a few minutes, she looked up to him. "You know, we'd be more comfortable in the bed down the hall?"
"You want me in your bed?" He asked.
Laurel took his hand and kissed his knuckles. "There is nowhere else I would rather have you. Not that I don't want to have you in many many places," She grinned.
That was the Laurel only he got to see and maybe Tommy. But definitely not Donner. Or her other boyfriends. And definitely not the team. It was just for those absolutely closet to her. "Come on," He said. "Let's go dream."
"Let's dream." She nodded at him.