A/N: Yes... I wasn't that mean to leave last chapter on a cliffhanger. ;-P Those reviews were pretty much some of the nicest I've ever received and made me a bit teary as this is the penultimate chapter and I will be sad to leave this arc behind. But on with the show! (Apologies for anyone who tried to read this chapter yesterday when I tried to edit a word via my phone and turned the chapter into code - not it's fixed)

Song for this chapter is Drown in You by Daughtry

Chapter Twenty

Drown in You

I watched the smoke from my cigarette trail up into the night air, looking up at a clear sky, a few stars out that I could see because of the light pollution in the damn city. We were in the suburbs, making it less bright, but still. I sat on the stoop of this safehouse, looking out into a normal neighbourhood. It was a Preventer safehouse and damn, I think if 'Fei wasn't banging Merquise we'd have been court marshalled and be on our way to an asteroid prison. Or maybe it was because of who we were and the fact we'd both nearly died bringing down a sociopathic asshole. Whatever. We were hidden, safe, and I looked out in a garden with flowers and pruned bushes and shit, it felt wrong and weird to be sat, free, free from Roth. As I'd seen his body, looked down before I'd leave that fucking roof and his blood had splashed on the sidewalk and he was dead. No more retribution. It was done. And Solo could fucking rest.

I chuckled under my breath. Solo was avenged, I guess, but it didn't make me feel better. Only made me feel a little sad as I thought of everything. And it didn't stop me missing him or thinking of his advice or learning how to fight under his careful eyes. You'd think I'd have learnt my lesson and all. That revenge never fucking worked. It never seemed I would.

I heard the cough behind me and I glanced up.

"Can I join you?"

"Free country," I answered, pushing down the butt of the cigarette into the step and watching Wufei as he sat down beside me.

We didn't say anything, a damn awkward pregnant pause, and I looked head on at some roses rather than to my side to him.

"You been fired?"

Wufei let out a bark of a laugh. "I resigned, remember?"

"You ain't going back?"

"I think it's time to stop fighting for me," he said softly and I turned, his expression was wistful, and I guess he was thinking of something. "I plan to study. In London."

"Near Zechsy baby, right?" I teased.

He raised one eyebrow. "It will be convenient yes… but I want to study somewhere with history."

I nodded and sighed, leaning back on my hands, my fingertips feeling the cold of the stone underneath them as I let myself look up to the sky.

"And you?"

I blinked and focused back on Wufei who was scanning my body. "Don't know. Me and 'Ro ain't had time to discuss it all… home ain't an option."

Wufei nodded as he knew as well as I did that our home, my business, our old life had been completely fucked. As showing 'Ro over the entire world's screens had kinda made it impossible for our identities to be kept secret and a few assholes from the area had called up news networks, telling anyone who would damn well listen about that fact that the war hero from the newscasts had lived near them. So shit, that was all gone. I felt nostalgic for it for a moment, thinking of how we'd lived and how we were never going back. But hell, we'd been through too fucking much I guess, too much had changed for us just to go back to that… I twirled my ring around my finger and sighed.

"Yeah, guess, we'll figure it out."

There was a long moment of silence then and I guess it was time to say thanks – for saving my ass, risking his life, sacrificing his job but man, I just looked dumbly at the sky, feeling the words were too big on my fucking tongue. Stuck in my goddamn throat.

"I should go," he said, getting to his feet in a graceful motion I couldn't manage with my body still pretty damn fucked.

"Yeah… guess we'll see you around."

I was on my feet, my hands in the pockets of my jeans, not sure what to do now. But then he fucking surprised me, going for some kinda loose hug that I reciprocated with an awkward pat on the back. When he let go, I gave him a look that suggested that I didn't know what the fuck I'd done to deserve that and he shrugged as he began to walk away.

"Hey!" I said and he turned, his sharp eyes on my face. "You tell Zechsy that if he fucks around with you , I'll kill him and it will be a fuckin' slow and painful torture."

"I will."

I watched him go, the Preventer vehicle parked on the street and I sighed, looked to see our team of friendly agents checking up on us and walked back inside the house, lingering only a little.

Maybe I was being a little bit of a damn coward as shit, here I was, after everything we'd been through, avoiding Heero. Okay, not exactly avoiding as he was out cold for the first twenty four hours, drugged to stop him from hurting himself and making him stay the fuck in bed. And after that, well the docs had sedated him a little, and I'd just sat beside him as he slept. But fuck, I felt guilty every second, seeing each wound, each cut of a blade, each bruise that showed how bad he'd been beaten and I was being a fucking coward as I knew I didn't damn deserve him and I'd been the cause of it. And fuck, it made me sick.

But I got some damn courage and walked back inside the safehouse, walking past our agents and giving them a nod as I walked up the stairs to the room we'd been sleeping in. I thought about taking a shower, getting rid of the smell of smoke from my hair and skin but instead, I walked to the room and saw he was not only awake, but propped up, managed to grab a tablet and reading.

"You're meant to be resting, babe."

He grunted and looked up, seeing the way I leaned against the doorframe, utterly fucking casual. Or that's what I was going for.

"Wufei left?"

"Yeah," I answered, "just a fleeting visit, I guess. Just wanted to see how fucked up we both were."

Heero made a noise and I walked across the room as he put down the tablet and I felt something damn ache every time I got close as I saw… I saw everything those fuckers had done and it made my heart beat fast and my blood boil.

"We can't go home," he said, softly and I nodded as I sat down on the bed, resting on the edge, trying not to damn touch him. I just didn't want to hurt him and he reached for where my arm rested on the bed.

"Yeah, guess not."

"Stop," he said and I looked up then, meeting his eye.

"It was my fault, fuck… look at what they did to you… all because of me. Shit, I never fucking deserved you but this? But this… shit…"

I attempted to make a move but his fingers tightened around my wrist and he pulled me, pretty damn hard considering he was still fucking injured and he grabbed the back of my head with the other hand, forcing me to fucking look at him, really look at him. And I saw how his eyes showed he was still fucking tired or that he was still a little drugged, so those cuts and bruises, some stubble on his jaw but mostly I was looking into those blue eyes.

"Roth did it. Not you.

"But -"

"Shut the fuck up," he growled and I stopped as 'Ro didn't swear a lot and shit, when he did it kinda meant something. "I love you. You are not running away from me."

He leaned forward, bridging the distance, and he captured my lips with his in a kiss that was needy and hot and slick and I was reaching out to touch, his bare chest, bandaged and then I recoiled, remembered how much pain he was probably in as I back off.

"You're hurt," I said and he ignored my protest, mashing our lips together like I dreamed we'd get chance to do again, my mind fucking reeling from having him with me, close, wanting me.

Any reluctance was starting to vanish as I reached for him, finding my body instinctively straddling him, Heero laying back onto the bed and I couldn't stop kissing him, couldn't stop running my fingers over him, feeling bandages and scars and fuck, I bit down on his lip, feeling him moan into my kiss and I pulled back to look down at him.

"I'm not made of glass. Touch me like you mean it."

I chuckled. "You know I never listen to you when you order me around, right?"

His hand reached to the bottom of my t-shirt, lifting it up and I moved back to remove it as he leaned up to kiss my abs, my stomach, everywhere that wasn't covered by the fucking bandage and I found my head going back as his hand delved into the sweatpants I'd been wearing and he began to stroke me, making me go from half way to hard to fully hard with a few of his firm strokes.

"'Ro, shit…" I murmured and he reached to the pants, pushing them, and I awkwardly slid them off, not moving off him like I shoulda done, but wriggling so that they bunched around my legs and then I kicked them off. I was naked then and he looked up at me, ran his fingertips over my sides, my arms, my ribs, and he could see all my bites and scratches and wounds.

"We both went through hell."

I swallowed, my body shivering at his touch and I reached down to where he was only wearing boxers, helping slide them off, noticing a few more cuts on his thighs. Once they were off, I looked down at him, my hands at either side of his torso and our faces close, our breaths ghosting across each other.

"You sure you're up to this?"

"You're just gonna have to do all the work."

I gave him a little smirk, brushed across his lips. "No problem."

It wasn't as I kissed every damn part of him, lapping and licking at him, tracing all those fucking scars. I ran my lips over each one, each bruise on his tanned skin, and I traced scratches with my tongue.

He moaned as sucked on his skin, as I reached my hand to touch his dick, long slow strokes that were driving him wild if any damn indication of the noises he was making. His head was thrown back as I looked up through my bangs, his hair covering his eyes, a hand over his face and I tried to wash away all those memories of pain and torture with me, my body, my mouth, my hands.

I wanted him to feel good. So fucking good that and I felt his hand on my shoulder, felt him reach for that tattoo and then to my hair, and I let my mouth trail lower, licking at his abs where they were covered by a goddamn bandage and then reached to his dick, looking up at his expression as I lightly sucked the head, letting my lips slide around him.

He bucked up, said my name or something and I knew that it was working, that he was feeling good and his body was reacting to something pleasurable. Not all that damn pain. His fingers tightened in my hair as I took more in my mouth, as I licked and sucked, as I tasted him on my tongue. I never thought I'd have this. Heero. Here. Underneath me. In bed with me. I never thought I'd damn touch him. Suck him off. Fuck him. Love him. So shit, I wanted him to see stars.

My rhythm increased, I let him thrust in and out a little, letting him move his hips and I only stopped him when I felt he was close, that hitch in his breath, the tremble of his thighs. I lifted my head up, taking a long lick around the slit to taste him and then moved up to kiss him.

"I need to go get something."

He didn't ask what something was as I hopped off the bed to the bathroom. This was a Preventer safehouse and there would be something useable as lube as they were stocked with everything that was needed for a stay but shit, I was not expecting actual lube. I looked at it and then noticed a little sticky note and I think I might have gagged a little if I thought about it too much.

Use it wisely.

There was nothing else on the damn thing. Not that it needed anymore. I was shaking my head as I walked back in, seeing him on the bed, his body damaged and bruised but utterly fucking perfect, his hand stroking himself and I held up the tube.

"Someone left us something."

"You're joking?"

I smirked as I climbed back onto the bed between his spread legs and I leaned down for a lingering kiss. "I'm not – there's a little post-it on it and everything." His hand had stopped his motion and I moved my hand to replace it, smooth strokes that made him grunt in appreciation of my skills. "Come on, the idea isn't that off-putting, babe. Wufei's very aware we have sex. And he has sex. So you know, we just say thank you to our lube fairy and move on."

He snorted. "Lube fairy? Please say that to his face."

I laughed, doing it as deep and as sexy as I damn well could and I'd already opened the tube, applied some to my fingers and slipped one inside, teasing a little, trying to be as careful as I could. I watched for any reactions, any pain, and I worked it inside while stroking his dick, while I kissed at his neck. I'd never wanted him more but I was patient, ignoring how hard I damn was, how much I wanted to come. Fuck, I had to as I never wanted this to be painful.

As soon as I was moving two, then three fingers, Heero's breathing was increasing and I stopped stroking him, only continued the mouthing and lapping and licking at his pulse. He told me with his body that he wanted to move on, sex was not when we did our communicating verbally, and when he was pushing back into my hand I damn well knew and I met his lips, kissing him as I slipped my fingers out, groping for the lube and squirting some onto my fingers. Hey, who said men couldn't multi-task as then I released his lips, saw him a little flushed, his blue eyes so damn dark in the low lighting and I positioned myself, him moving one leg to my waist, the other he draped over my elbow as I used my hand to help me slide into him.

I did it so damn slowly, carefully, my own breathing so damn erratic, my heart beat so damn fast but this time the ba dums were not because I was close to death but because I was close to him. And fuck, I never thought I wold be again. Once I was inside, I took a deep breath, looked down, and found his hand, the one with the ring on and I entwined our fingers before I moved, moving my hips a little, in and out, in small motions until he had adjusted, until his body was ready.

I wanted to fuck him forever, I wanted to be connected, joined, whatever with him for as long as I possibly could but I knew there was too much for it to last. Too much pain, emotion, pent up desire, and need. So much goddamn need that I found myself moving faster, worried for a second that I was hurting him, but fuck he pushed into me, meeting me thrust for thrust, his free hand gripping onto my bicep for leverage.

"You feel... Fuck...so good," I babbled as he did, he felt perfect - me inside him, his dick brushing my abs as I leaned over, our lips clashing, noses bumping, skin slippery with sweat and our hands connected.

"You too," he grunted and I increased my pace, pounding him harder into the mattress as he bucked up against me, into me, wanting me and I closed my eyes, dropped my head to his collarbone and rolled my hips, hearing his noises, knowing I was doing something damn right when he clawed at my skin, a long drawn out moan coming from his lips.

"I can't..." he said and I couldn't articulate, I only thrust in, a few more times, the friction of his dick against my body making him come and that sensation, him pulling me into him further with his leg, him arching up, made me come so fucking hard, my body feeling pleasure in every damn nerve.

I collapsed onto him, sweaty and sticky and damn exhausted but happy.

"I think I saw stars," I mumbled against his chest.

His body moved underneath me and he laughed that soft little laugh I thought I'd never damn hear again.

I rolled off him inelegantly, splaying myself on the bed, hot and sticky but so damn happy and sated.

"What next?" I asked after a few moments of silence, my head turning to look into his eyes.

"A shower?"

I slapped him playfully on the shoulder for his deadpan response. "Naw for us."

He reached for my hand with the ring and ran his thumb over the metal band.

"This... The rest we figure out later."

"No plan, Yuy?" I teased.

"Let's be reckless."

"Yeah?" I moved then, finding a spot on his chest and he answered, a low "yeah" and I relaxed on his body, feeling his fingers caress my skin, my hair, tracing the patterns of the angel of my tattoo and damn... It truly was over and it didn't matter there was no fucking plan as I had 'Ro and I would never let him fall.