I DO NOT OWN SHUGO CHARA

THORNS OF BETRAYAL:

Chapter 3- What makes a monster?

(Amu pov)

I sat there in my room, alone. Allowing the words flow through me to the paper. My mind felt blank except on the thought of him. The way he would play his violin, the way it felt when he held me, the way his eyes would light up when he saw me.

Tears prickled at my eyes, moist,warm, and falling down. Falling down just like I had. The sound of his violin both beautiful and sad brought contradicting emotions. A small smile crept to my face, but tears of sadness fell.

I was the violin, he had been the player. He was a god when he played, able to awe a whole crowed into silence. But what happens when he breaks the violin? Is it replaced or left somewhere to be forgotten? Does he ever stop to think once of what he had done to the broken violin? Or is it to broken, to useless, to insignificant that it can easily be replaced?

He was a bitter sweet memory, the kind that had you laugh and cry. I never could truly hate him not once, but I hated what he had done. I wouldn't let myself be forgotten whether I was that broken violin. Revenge such a bitter sweet word, just like the memories of him.

I stared at the paper that I had been writing on. My emotions memories all came out on the paper. The words told what I kept in mind, the words told of the pain I could not voice. I sat there staring at the paper as if the words could disappear if I wield it to. But once written and stained in ink the paper cannot be cleaned. No you must grab a new paper, a paper that would soon yet again be full.

I never wished to have time stopped or frozen for me. I could still see and feel what I had that night. The night I had pricked my finger on his thorn. Who knew such a beautiful thing could be the death of you. Monster that's what I was what he is. I still could feel the fear, the chills, hear the screams.

Blood and tears were spilled that night. But through the blood and tears an emotion was born. A hunger a need for revenge, revenge on the one I love. Funny how even loving someone with everything you have can't stop the want for revenge.

If what they say is true and you hurt the ones you love then he must have loved me alot. Then again he may have very well have hated me...but with hate there is love. The moon shined bright as my eyes glowed red. The need for blood the blood of one like me.

Betrayed, jealous, hurt the need to feed strong like those emotions. Although in truth I suppose it was a band aid. A band aid to sustain me I would never be truly satisfied. Not until I have his blood and not until I end my life.

In truth I do not call myself a monster because I am a vampire. I do not call Ikuto a monster because he is a vampire either. I call myself a monster because the need for revenge the longing to see him hurt. That is why I am a monster but aren't we all monsters at some point? Ikuto is a monster not because he turned me, stopping time for me. He is a monster because despite the pain and hurt he has caused me...he left me broken and scared, he lied to the ones I loved and to me.

He is a monster not because he left me living but not really living, because he made me a monster. He had caused me to seek revenge, caused me to want to see him bleed the need to embrace him as he vanishes from this world. I suppose the fact he left me, after he had forced me into a world I never wished to be apart of is the real betrayal. I closed my eyes swaying to the sound of the violin of my past.

I walked out the door and headed toward the park, the place where it all began. I stood exactly where I had the first time I layed eyes on him. I could almost see him, hear his hauntingly beautiful song. Lingering for eternity, etched into my mind perfectly.

I didn't have to see to know he was near. Where exactly I couldn't say I felt him though. This wouldn't be the first time I had gone many places searching for him. Only to feel my soul and heart calling out too him. To once again when he left feel the emptiness inside.

I could sense him with every bone in my body the closer he was the stronger I felt. I had not really seen him since that day, but I felt him and that drove me to continue. Along with the longing to spill his blood was the longing to be held in his arms.

I suppose it was the reason my anger grew, the reason I seeked revenge. In truth maybe it was the fact I couldn't hate him. If I could hate him then maybe I wouldn't be obsessed with hurting him. Maybe it was the fact I loved him that made me a monster. "Ikuto..." I whispered to the wind, with that I left.

(Ikuto pov)

I felt the pain, anger,and sadness she felt. I always had and always will. I longed for her, but resisted the urge to go to her. I had traveled trying to escape the pain, the pain I had caused. I had left her when she needed me, something I promised to never do. I had forced her to become that which I am.

The taste of her blood still lingered, the way she attempted to fight back, her body drained of blood laying underneath me. Love was it because of love? I was selfish and didn't want to ever face losing her. In the end I suppose I had lost her. I heard her whisper my name. For a moment I was tempted to run to her and pull her to me.

Though I doubt she would have allowed a monster like me to do so. I knew where she was staying, I knew Utau and Kukai were now aware of her. I had kept my distance not to fool them, but to punish myself. Lonely I deserved to be alone for eternity.

I walked to the place where she had stood moments ago. Walking up the small steps of the gazebo, I turned to stare at the empty spot. Empty like my heart and soul. I could almost see her dancing to my music.

Slowly I took out my violin and played the song from that day. I stared at the empty spot as I played, seeing ghostly images of her dancing once again. When I could no longer bare it I put the violin away. Whispering "I love you." To the air.

So what makes a monster? Is it hurting someone, leaving them, betraying them? Or is it the fact that even though you love them you hurt them, betray them, and leave them?