Nero Speaks: Everyone one you remembers that in Into Darkness Old Fart Spock tells Young Fart Spock that Khan is the most dangerous man he will ever encounter. I want to tell you that is all BS. I destroyed Vulcan and he thinks Khan is the bad ass? Seriously? Oh wait, what planet was that I destroyed? Vulcan. It doesn't exist anymore, auf Weidersehen, bye bye, nada, no more.
Khan: I blew up Praxis.
Nero: A moon. I blew up a planet full of Vulcans. How many Klingons did you blow up? A planet's worth? Noooooooo.
Khan: I designed the Vengeance.
Nero: I had my own war ship. And I blew up Vulcan!
Khan: I took out San Francisco.
Nero: But you missed Star Fleet. The only reason why I think they picked you over me is because Spock is gay.
Spock: Uh…how…I mean….it's not canon.
Khan: I killed both Spock and Kirk….sort of.
Nero (smugly): He likes your butt.
Khan: No.
Nero: Yes he does. How many fanfic videos have you seen that focus on your butt?
Spock: It is a nice butt.
Khan: I took out an entire Klingon detail. I crushed Admiral Marcus' head.
Nero (even more smugly): Its your butt. And if I had been successful, Earth would have been my next target. I mean I came back in time. You were a thawed out popsickle. I demand a retraction from Old Fart Spock.
Kirk: he's not here.
Nero: Well you better get one or else I'll…..
Kirk: What? We destroyed you too.
Nero: Point taken.
Uhura to Spock: That explains the dry kisses. (storms off)
Nero (to Khan): Don't bend over….and ask yourself this…who was guarding you when you took your shower? Hhmmmm?
Kirk: Can we continue with Why I like you?
Nero: I know why Spock likes Khan.
Carol Marcus: Everyone likes Khan.
Admiral Marcus: I don't. Come on Pike, we can take him now.