note: yes, I am awful at updating HERE IS SOME DAN PLEASE FORGIVE ME

Chapter 8: When You Are Worlds Away

Dan stares blankly at the outdated and somewhat decrepit computer screen, wrinkling up his nose at the pungent smell of hot chips and unwashed bodies. He rarely frequented Internet Cafés and this establishment couldn't have reminded him more why this was the case. Looking past the owner himself, and the equally delightful users watching porn on either side of him, the place itself was grossly overcrowded, the chairs squished against each other - the mouse was covered by a slimy substance that Dan wasn't entirely sure he wanted to know the origins of, and use the keyboard was heavily impeded by the abundance of crumbs wedged between the keys.

While Dan would never have coped in such conditions in the past, today he hardly noticed these aspects, if only to note his disdain, his task was far more important. The homepage takes at least two minutes to load and he has to wait again after he types in the web address he could never truly forget. He's not entirely sure what he expected to find, or even what it was precisely that drove him to do this, even after so much time had passed.

It's just the way it was before. The same video promoted on his home page, the same links in the sidebar, the same picture and coloured words proclaiming 'AmazingPhil' decorating the top of the page. It's as if he's opening a door to his past and the torrents of memories he's kept at bay, tried to move on from, are challenging him, edging on rushing back, wetting his eyes- the afternoons spent editing together, picking songs and graphics, reviewing their joint videos and making certain that they have cut out any incriminating footage…

It's funny how important it seemed back then, keeping everything secret, keeping them a secret. It wasn't because they were afraid of how people would react; at least he's fairly certain it wasn't. They'd told their closest friends and it didn't seem important to go much further than that. Somehow that decision had grown to a rule of nothing revealing in their videos, which had only grown more difficult as Phil grew very fond of sneaking an arm around Dan's waist whenever they were sitting close together.

Dan absentmindedly opens a new internet window, only mildly aware that he is allowing himself to remember, something he's fought for so long to avoid. Somehow, it's more comforting than he'd expected it to be. Logging into his email, his mind wanders painfully to the way Phil's hair looked first thing in the morning, fluffy and messy, before he'd had the chance to iron the black locks smooth. He can feel tears slowly prickling in the corners of his eyes, but ignores it, suddenly intrigued by what's appeared on the screen. Dan and Phil both started sorting their emails more than a year ago- anything important could easily be flooded by fanmail and spam – and in the first section, the part reserved for personal emails from friends, there was one new email, sent only two days earlier.

From: Carrie Hope Fletche
Subject: DANIEL JAMES HOWELL READ THIS NOW

His eyes flashing with panic, Dan swiftly opens the email, scanning the contents in less than a minute, his pulse quickening and terror growing with every sentence.

Hi Dan
I don't know if you're going to get this in time or if you can even read your emails right now but I guess it's worth a shot. Of course there's always a chance that they'll track this back to me, but hopefully the public library doesn't share it's security camera footage.
They've taken everyone, whoever they are. Alex, Charlie, PJ and Chris are all gone and I don't know if it's your fault but I know that before you left nothing was wrong and now everything is. Me and Phil are okay, for now, we're hiding and getting money and getting by, but I know this can't last forever.
I don't know if you're going to read this but I can't be sure that someone else won't find it so I can't tell you our plan for sure, only we're not going to sit around and wait to be picked off like the others.
Maybe they have you too…
How do we know where is safe? Or who is safe.. maybe I should just delete this, but I can't just go without leaving some kind of message. If you are reading this, reply within one day because I'll be checking this again tomorrow, but after that I don't want to risk someone recognizing me again.
I hope this isn't just me being silly and emotional, I hope you read this.. I hope you come back. He still misses you, more than ever.
Love, Carrie.

He reads it twice more, just to make sure he hasn't misread a word, before deleting the email and his internet history and hurrying out of the café, almost knocking three chairs on his way out. Dan's skin feels cool and clammy, even as he stands in the glare of the warm afternoon sun. It is only ingrained training and immense self discipline that stop him from sprinting all the way back to his apartment to collect his things. Every step feels like a decade as he forces his feet into what would appear to be a regular walking pace, changing the focus of his gaze every eight to fifteen seconds- you never know who is watching.

When Dan finally makes it to his apartment, locking the door behind him, he packs all of his belongings in less than two minutes- not that he has many items worth taking with him. Sitting on the edge of his bed, he pulls his watch off his arm, noting the time, 4:15pm- in two hours it will be peak traffic and take much longer than an hour to get to the airport, but the wait is worth it; no need to get anyone who might be watching intrigued over his sudden change of plans. He can book a flight to England from the airport, he's earnt enough to cover that and a night at the airport hotel if it's going to take a while, but it really doesn't matter either way- Dan Howell is going home.

For NeverlandNat, DevTheManiac and i-like-to-write-too, it would never happen otherwise :P

Dan is back in the picture? Please let me know what you think, and more to follow soon! x