damn freaking internet. it freaking hates me. ugh...

anyways. hello again guys.

i have some bad news; well, it's really more annoying. so i will be done with this story soon, like a few days, just i probably won't be able to finish this it before i go back to school, which is tomorrow (monday). before you get all knotted up, it will be done. like i said. it's will more annoying for me than bad for you.

anyways...enjoy

Chapter XLII

(Epov)

I was fading in and out. When I was out, the same images flashed through and the same line rang in my ear. When I was in, I wasn't really sute where I was. The first time I thought I was I kept hearing screaming. Someone was screaming the word "call! Call!" I didn't know who was calling or was getting called or what was happening. I felt the pain in my leg again. I wanted to scream again, but couldn't. I faded back out.

Then when I faded in, I couldn't open my eyes all the way. I could open them enough to see white…something, pass through. They were bright squares, I think. Bright square, another bright square. They reminded me of the bright lights I saw coming towards me before I closed my eyes. I wanted to close them again until I saw someone. He looked like my father. He was yelling at something. "Dad?…" I heard myself groan.

He looked down at me. "Edward. It's okay son, I'm here."

It was him. "Mom, Alice…" I groaned.

"They are in the waiting room." he said to me.

"I'm sorry." I shook my head. I felt something hard and melt under my head. "Tell them I'm sorry." I told him.

"Okay, Edward; please save your energy." He said. Maybe that was a good idea.

I turned my head so I wouldn't see the bright squares, but I couldn't get away from them. They just kept passing by. Maybe dad could do something about the bright squares. "Turn it down." I groaned.

"Turn what down, son?"

"The squares. The squares. Dad, turn them down." I told him. How did he not see the squares? They were too bright to miss.

"I can't do that, son." He said.

Ugh. No. That wasn't the answer I wanted to hear. I groaned. I felt myself twisting from side to side, trying to get away from the squares or at least trying to find a comfortable spot on whatever I was on. I was strapped down, well I felt like it.

Out of nowhere, I felt a pain in my leg and it shot through my body. I heard a loud and pained scream. "Edward." I heard someone as someone placed their on my shoulder.

"My leg! Dad, my leg! It hurts. Make it stop; please make it stop!" I begged

"Edward, I will. I will son." I heard him say. Right after he did, something poked me in my arm. I heard the scream quieted and I faded back out.

XXX

While I was unconscious the pictures and imagines and scenes kept playing in my head. Over and over. It was the same ones I saw when I was in the car and I closed my eyes. I was numb to my surroundings and I didn't know where I was, but I wasn't numb to what was happening. When I kept reliving the scenes that were playing, I kept feeling pinches in, in stomach and ribs, even in certain parts of my face. It was one that right under one of my eyes. There was pinches mostly in my arm. I felt still the scenes and still in place. Not only could I not move, I couldn't talk. But the one person I kept seeing was responding to me as if I did say something. I heard her laugh and saw her smile. It was a safe place. A place I wanted to stay.

I don't know how long it was before I woke up again. I looked around to see I was in a hospital room. When did I get in the hospital? Was I in here when I saw those bright squares? That might explain why I saw my dad. I mean, I love him, but I wouldn't think he was an angel.

"Hey, you're up." I heard someone say in shock. I turned to see my father checking my IV. "I didn't expect you to be awake." He said stepping away from it.

I gave a groan. "What happen? How did I get here?" I asked.

"You were in an accident." He said. I knew that. "The person who hit you brought you in." While he was talking, my leg was inching. When I went to starch it, I felt a bandage. I moved the blanket to see why it was there. When I did, I saw it was huge bandage from the middle of my thigh to a few inches beyond my knee.

"What happened to my leg?" I asked him.

"When the car hit you, apparently he was going so fast that he pushed the passenger's side so far in, it made something stab you in the side of the leg. We don't know what it was because by the time we got it out of your leg, it was too bloody to identify. It was too deep in your leg to just pull it out without causing permanent damage to your leg so we had to surgery remove it. As well as some glass that was stuck in your arm." he explained. I looked down and turned my arm over. That explains why I had so many stich scars on my arm. "Apparently, the car tiled on the side and skidded. Your instincts must've kicked in and you lifted it to protect yourself because it was more glass there than anywhere else." He added.

I gave a hard sigh and tossed the cover back over me. I laid my head back. "I should've moved." I mumbled to myself.

"Why didn't you? Were you texting and driving? I told…"

"Dad…" I groaned as I turned away from him. I didn't want a lecture or an "I told you so". If he was going to do that, he could leave.

He gave a sigh. "I know. Now's not the time." I'm glad he said that, but it wasn't like I was really going to listen to him. "Your sister was so worried." He said. I turned back him. "She thought it was her fault." He said.

"Did you tell her it wasn't and that I'm okay?" I asked.

He nodded. "I also told her it was okay for her to go back to the prom..."

"She left the prom?" I asked him. He nodded again. Oh Alice. "Is she still here?" I asked.

"I believe so. Would like for me to get her for you?" he asked.

"Yeah." I told him. He gave a nod before leaving, closing the door behind him. I laid there for a moment before I heard the door open again.

"Edward?" I heard a small voice. I turned to the door and saw my sister staying there.

When she saw me, she let out a cry. Right now, the damn slit in her dress was the last of my problems. "Come here." I told her, holding out the one good arm I had. She let out another cry before running towards my bed.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't been texting you; if I knew you were driving, I wouldn't have. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." She cried as she hugged me tightly around the neck.

I lifted my good arm and gave her half hug back. "Alice, listen to me when I say this is no way your fault." I told her.

She looked at me. "But…"

"Stop it. Like you said, you didn't know I was driving. I could've gotten those pictures when I was home, or at least waited to reply to them. I was the idiot paying more attention to my phone than to the road. And why did you leave prom?"

"Because, Edward, you're my brother; I couldn't have fun…"

"I told you that it was your night and not to worry about me. Dad was here, he was going to take care of me."

She sniffed and wiped her eyes. "I know. I guess I had to see for myself."

"I understand, but I'm fine." I reminded her. "Besides some minor cuts, it's was really just my leg."

"Your leg?" she asked. I nodded. "Will you be able to play football?" she asked.

I gave a hard sigh and I laid my head on the pillow. "I didn't know. I didn't ask dad." I asked. To be honest, I don't think about it; at least not right now. I had to do something else. After what just happened, I knew I couldn't hold it anymore. If I don't do anything else, I needed to do it. I turned to Alice. "Did Bella come with you?" I asked her.

She nodded. "She and Jasper drove me. Everyone is in the waiting room. They were all worried about you. You want me to tell them to come in?" she asked.

I shook my head. "But can you tell Bella to come in?" I asked her.

"No one else?" she asked.

I shook my head again. "Just Bella." I told her. I figure Alice knew why I wanted to see just Bella without asking. I was glad because I think Bella needed to be the first one to hear what I was going to say. Alice gave a nod before turning and walking towards the door. "Hey," I called after her. She turned and looked at me. "Are you okay?" I asked her, wondering if she needed a little more time to stay in here with me. If so, I could hold off for a little while longer to be with my sister.

Alice nodded and wiped her face again. "I think I'm fine." she said before leaving the room.

While I waited, I thought about what I was going to say, how I was going to say it. I wondered how she would react.

I heard the door open again. I guess my time was up. I turned to the door and Bella standing there in the doorway in the most elegant and beautiful dress I have ever seen anyone in. The pictures Alice sent to me did not do Bella any kind of justice. I was right. It was a sight to see her in a ball grown. She looked so beautiful. "Wow, you look great." I told her.

She gave a light chuckle as she stepped further in the room. "Thanks. You look like…you got in a fight with scissors." She gave a light tease.

"Try glass." I corrected after a very small chuckle. I was glad she could joke about it and wasn't crying like my sister. It would make anything afterwards a little awkward. "And the glass won." I told her.

"By a landslide." She added as she stepped more in the room.

"Yeah, you should see my leg. But maybe the scars will add to my sex appeal." I teased lightly.

She gave a chuckle. "Wow, even in a hospital bed, you have quite the ego." She answered.

It was my shell. I looked to see she was actually in the room and not in the doorway. "Can you actually close the door?" I said.

"Sure." she replied before turning and pushing the door closed. She turned back to me. "How are you feeling, seriously?" she asked as she walked towards the bedside.

I shook my head. "Like a damn idiot. I should've seen that car before it got too close. But I guess it happened for a reason." I told her.

"I'm just glad you're okay. Hey, may I ask you a question?" she asked

"Sure." I told her.

She looked at the bed. Then back at me. "May I sit?" she asked.

"Uh, yeah." I said. I gave a pained groaned as I moved over to make room for her. "Was that your question?" I asked as she climbed up and sat on the edge of bed.

She laughed. "No. I've read that when people had near-dead experiences or something, they see their whole live flash before their eyes. Is that what happened with you; you don't have to answer if you don't want to." She said, adding the last part quickly. It was probably because she thought that I thought it was too soon. It couldn't be soon enough because I knew I had to answer questions like that.

Then I gave a hum. I had to think about if I wanted to tell her or not. The reason being was that what I saw and what I heard and what was replaying in my head over and over had a lot to do with what I had to talk to her about. I guess I really had no choice. "Actually, I saw the things that were most important to me."

"So what, football, track, Norte Dame?" she teased.

I shook my head. "I saw the look on my dad's face when he first introduced me to Esme. The look on Esme's face the first time I called her mom and the first time I told her I loved her. And then I saw Alice's smile tonight before she left for the prom." I told her.

"Wow, that's so sweet." She said.

"I guess. But after all those things passed, I could only see one thing and only hear on thing. Earlier tonight, before I left, my mom said that sometimes, you have to go through some things to realize how much you love something and I couldn't help but think about that when I got hit. The one thing I saw, that I kept seeing was you."

Her eyes widened. "M-me?"

"From the first time I stopped you in the hall and everything beyond that. I think even before then. Anytime we were together. Anything I saw you and you didn't see me. I just kept seeing you, I kept hearing you laugh, or seeing your smile. Just you. Bella, on Valentine's Day, you asked me a question and I didn't know then, but I lied to you."

"Ed-Edward, wh-wha-wh…" she stopped and gave a hard sigh. "What exactly are you trying to say?" she asked.

I knew what I was trying to say. There was no more trying to think about it or trying to deny it. "Bella, I am in love with you."

"What?" she said in shock as she jumped off the bed. She acted as if she couldn't get off fast enough. I should've expected that. What did I think; she would say it back and fall into my arms? Sadly, yeah. That's exactly what I thought.

"I knew I had feelings for you, but I didn't know how deep they were. And I thought I could ignore it, but I couldn't. I'm in love with you." I repeated

When I said it the second time, she looked away from me. She placed one hand in her hair. She closed her eyes and shook her head. I wondered what she was thinking. Before I could ask her, she let out a chuckle. Not really the reaction I was looking for. She let out another chuckle then another then another before fully laughing. She dropped her hand from her hair and laughed more as she shook her head. What hell was going on inside this girl's head?

She opened her eyes and looked at me. "I shouldn't have reacted like that." No, she really should have. "I've known before coming in here you might be a little out of it." she said, before chuckling more.

"What the hell are you talking about?" I snapped.

"You're high." She said simply. I gave her a confused look. Again, what the hell was she talking about? "You know, from the medicine. You're loopy and saying things you don't mean." She explained.

Loopy? Loopy? I literally just exposed myself, my feelings to her and she thought I was fucking loopy? I guess that explained why she was laughing. Hell, if this was reverse, I would probably think the same damn thing. "Do I sound loopy?" I asked.

"Well…" she stopped and let out another laugh. "Yeah, you kinda do. There's no way you would say those things if you're high as a kite. Don't worry, I won't tell anyone because I know you didn't mean it." she said.

"But I do." I told her calmly because I knew snapping at her wouldn't help.

When she saw I wasn't joking, her smile slipped a little. "No you don't."

"Yes, I do." I told her. "Bella, I meant every word."

Her smile slipped more. "No you did not." she urged.

"Yes, I did. I'm in love with you, Bella Swan." I said again. I thought she would take more seriously if I called her by her whole name; well, hall her whole name because I knew how she felt about her full, full name.

When I said it again, her smile slipped all the way off her face. She clearly saw I wasn't high, and I wasn't joking and I never was. "Stop it." she ordered.

"Stop what?" I asked.

"Stop saying that. Stop thinking whatever you're thinking to make you say it. Stop feeling whatever you're feeling that is making you think that's right. Just stop it." she ordered.

"I can't stop it, Bella. You don't think I've tried?" I asked.

"No, I don't." she said shaking her head.

"Well, I have because I know how you feel about Jasper…"

"Then why do you keep saying it?" she snapped.

"Because I can't stop it, Bella." I snapped back, couldn't hold it in anymore. Did she really think was saying anything of this to make her uncomfortable, to make her mad? I wasn't. And I couldn't just turn it off. I tried and tried and it didn't work. Honesty, I was tired of trying. She should know she had other choices besides Jasper. "I'm in love with you and honestly, I want you to not be with him because I want you with me."

"Why would you say that?" she said.

"Because I can't keep lying to you or to myself about this. And if you want me to apologize for how I feel, you might be waiting a while, because I'm not going to." I told her. She nervously ran her hands repeatedly throughout her hair. She turned away from me. She stayed that way, facing away from me for moments, running her hands through her hair every few seconds. She didn't look at me; she wasn't even mumbling or anything. She just stayed facing away from me. Now that she knew I wasn't high, I didn't know what her thoughts were. But I knew what I was thinking and what I was feeling. I knew I couldn't take the silence. "So, you're just not going to respond, like at all?" I asked her. I knew I shouldn't push, but I needed to know.

When I said that, it was like I snapped her out of trance she was in. She dropped her hands from her hair and turned me. She gave an upset look. I couldn't tell if she was angry, or sad or what. But without warning, she walked over me and hit me as hard as she could on my shoulder. It was a good thing it was my good arm and not the one with bits of flesh missing here and there. It still hurt. And confusing; she was the first girl I say something like that to and meant it. First, she laughs then she punch me in the shoulder. Maybe this was the reason I never said it before. "Ow! Bella, what the hell is wrong with you?" I snapped.

"How dare you?" she replied, totally ignoring what I just said. How dare I what, did she not know that she was the one who hit me? Before I could say anything, she went on. "For years, you walked around with your little crowd following in behind you. You looked at me like I was below you and you let Tanya treat me like a bug she could just step on." she said.

Was she mad because that, things that happened before I knew her? And what did that have to do with anything that was happening between us now? "Bell..."

She interrupted me before I could even get her whole name out. "How dare you stop me in the hall and you get me to go against everything I thought of you to help you get what you want so I could get what I wanted? How dare you make me think that what I wanted and what I was getting wasn't the same thing? How dare you get mad at me and not tell me the whole truth? I asked you, Edward. I asked you a straight question and just wanted a straight answer. But you never gave that to me. You lied and walked around it, and made me feel like I was doing something wrong. How dare you do that to me?" as she ranted, I noted her voice cracking with every passing thought. "How dare you not come to prom tonight or not even tell me? How dare you not tell me any of that until after you get in an accident?" I saw as tears started rolling down her face. "And how dare you even get in a car accident and make me…" she breathed hard. "And make me worry about you…" she stopped and let out a breath. When she did, it came out more as a cry than a hard breath. "And how dare you…how dare you…" She covered her muffle to mouth the cries that coming out. She dropped her hand. "How dare you make me care about you?" she cried.

So that what was wrong. She was upset because she cared. She knew she care more than she should. That was why she got so emotional, because she cared more than she thought she would.

I didn't know what to do or what to say. I reached out for her to somewhat comfort her. Before my hand could touch hers, she yanked it out of my reach. "Please don't. Don't try to console me. You are so selfish for saying something like that. You're such a, such a…you're such a damn selfish, stupid jerk." she snapped as she hit me on the arm again. My eyes widened. Not at the hit. It wasn't as hard as the first one. I suppose the emotion got to her where she didn't have a much power behind it.

It was because she swore at me. The first time I ever heard something like that come out of her mouth and it was towards me. Was she that upset?

I gave a hard sigh. I wish could say I regret saying anything. I wish I could say I shouldn't have told her. I couldn't say I was sorry or that I shouldn't have say anything because I didn't feel any of that. I knew I should've told her. She had to know what I was thinking every time I saw her with Jasper. I knew he was my friend, but I couldn't help how I felt. She was right. I was selfish. Not because of how I felt and who I felt it for. It was because I didn't care and I didn't regret it.

"I don't know what to tell you." I told her.

"Tell me you don't mean it. Tell me you take it back." she ordered as more tears rolled down her face.

I was going to say it, say what she wanted me, so I could make her stop crying. I didn't want her to feel stressed over something that was supposes to be good. I opened my mouth to let the words out, but I just let out a sigh instead. "I can't do that." I told her. If I did, I would right back where I was before.

She wiped her face before shaking her head. "I don't think I can handle this. I need to go." She said before turning away from me. I turned away from the door so I wouldn't see her walk through. I heard the door open then a moment later, I heard it softly close. That means she didn't close it. As soon as she got out the room, she walked away from the door. That could've gone better.

XXX

After Bella left, my mom came in the room. I told her I didn't want to talk. She didn't reply. Instead, she just pushed my hair to the side and kissed my forehead. "Everything will work out fine." that was all she said before she walked towards the door. "You need your rest. I'll tell your father not to let you have any more visitors." She said. I mumbled thanks. She nodded before closing the door. After Bella, I wasn't in the mood to see anyone else, especially not my friends. Since I wasn't talking to anyone else, I thought it would be best to do with my mom suggested and go to sleep.

As I slept, I dreamt of how the thing between Bella and me would've gone differently. In one dream, she didn't laugh, just went straight to crying. In another one, she just smiled and kissed me on the forehead as if I was some eight year-old telling that to my teacher. In another, she didn't even answer me. They all end with her walking out the door and leaving me confused.

I don't know how long I was asleep. I knew I wanted to stay asleep so I wouldn't have to face the situation I knew was coming. I knew the thing didn't end when she walked out the door. It just delayed it. Maybe the longer I stayed asleep, it would delay it more.

I woke up because my throat was dry, too dry to sleep through. I didn't know what time it was when I did finally wake up, but it must've been late because it was completely dark in my room expect for the moon light shining through the window. I looked over and saw what I wanted, a cup on the tray next to my bed. I reached for it and I heard a voice. "You're awake." It said. I couldn't help but jump.

The small light by the window turned on and Bella was sitting in the chair. She had her legs propped on one of the armrests while leaning against the other one. She was still in her prom dress. How long was she there? "Bella, what is wrong with you? You scared the crap out of me. Why the hell are you sitting in the dark like that?" I asked, still recovering from the surprise.

She gave a small smile. "My apologizes; my intention wasn't to frighten you." She replied.

"It's okay." I told her before looking at the tray again. At least I can see the cup better. I reached for it again.

"Do you wish for me to obtain that for you?" she asked when she saw it.

I shook my head. "I got it." I told her. I grabbed the end of the tray and pulled it close enough for me to easily grab the cup. I took a few gulps before placing it back on the tray and pushing the tray away from me. I looked up to see she was still looking at me. ""Are you going to answer my question?" I asked.

She lifted her eyebrows. "Which was?" she invited for me to go on.

"Why were you just sitting in the dark like that?" I asked her again.

She gave a shrug as she turned and looked through the window she was sitting next to. "I'm letting my thoughts wonder. Your father granted me the permission of staying in here with you."

"Okay, let me phrase, why are you in here?" I asked.

She lifted an eyebrow in question. "Do you not wish for my company? Would you prefer if I exited the room?" she asked.

"You know I didn't mean that. What I meant was, hasn't everyone left?"

She nodded. "When they were aware that you were okay, they processed to the hotel, yes." She answered.

"Why didn't you go with them?" I asked.

"I thought it was best to stay here." She answered.

"Jasper was okay with that?"

"I'm not his property, Edward." She answered. Then she looked at her hands in her lap. "Nonetheless, he couldn't comprehend why I had a desire to stay here when we both were aware of you condition." She looked at me. "I informed him that when you woke up, if you woke up before tomorrow, I needed to discuss something with you and I didn't wish postponement it. I told him I couldn't deliberately have fun while you were in here, not to mention I wouldn't be capable of contemplate on anything else with a certain thing preoccupying my mind." She scratched her cheek. "I told him he and I could spend a day in Seattle then I would spend the night over their house so we would be with together all day."

When she told me about her plans with Jasper, it only made me think of thing. "You didn't tell him, about before." I assumed.

She shook her head. "I didn't deem it relevant." She answered, starching her cheek again. I noticed she still have steaks on her face. Maybe she was trying to get rid of them.

I noticed something else. All the words she was using. I understood what she was saying because I've learn to use context clues when it came to her. Even though she was very relaxed when it came to her speech, she still let words that no one else really knew slip. It was usually when we were doing homework. So why was she talking like that now? I could only think of one reason. "Are you nervous?" I asked.

She gave her cheek a light rub. "Why did you ask that?" she replied.

"Well, I noticed the words you're using."

"It is not like you don't understand any of them." She noted, knowing I was understanding her because I was responding and answering her like I did.

"I didn't mention that because I didn't understand you. I said that because I noticed you drop a few words when we're studying. However, you go back into full smart girl mode when you're nervous." I told her what I noticed. It's what happened right after her makeover and we went to the diner. I noticed she sometimes did it around Jasper when they first started talking.

She laughed. "That's very observant of you. Were you always like that before…you know…"

I gave a shrug. "I saw you without seeing, if that makes sense." I told her.

She nodded and looked away. "I get it."

"So are we going to talk about it?" I asked. She looked at me again. Her face was saying "about what?". I knew she knew what I was talking about. I didn't want to say it because of how she reacted the first time I said. I wanted to talk about it before she walked out the room again. "Talk about the thing you told Jasper you wanted to talk about." I said. She didn't say anything as she looked away and out the window again. Was she just going to ignore it? "Bella…"

"The moon is pretty tonight." She said, switching topics. What was she talking about?

"Uh…"

"It's full. I didn't know that. While you were asleep, I was thinking of something. The moon is actually kinda funny." She said. I didn't reply. I was sure there was a reason she was talking about the moon and not what we were talking about before she left the first time. "When it's not there, when it's a new moon, it only appears to be not there. It's actually still there. It's just the earth is covering it. As the months go by, the earth move and more of the moon is shown. We slowly see more and more of the moon being revealed, however, we're not fully aware until it full. Sometimes we still don't see it until someone points it out."

Is that why she started talking about it? Was that supposes to mean something? "Is that supposes to be some kind of double meaning?" I asked. She looked at me. I'm sure she meant for her face to say something along the lines of "what do you think?". I think it was. I think it was referring to what she said about Tanya and me and how we treated her for so long. "Bella" I started with a sigh. "Look, what you said before about me and Tanya; it was true. We did treat you like that and I am really sorry. I don't know what else to say, but I'm sorry. And that just because you spoke the truth, it doesn't change how I feel about you now." I told her.

She gave a hum. "I don't think I brought it up for you to feel sorry." She said.

"Then why did you?"

She shrugged and looked away from me. I noticed she was doing that a lot. Maybe to avoid looking at me. "Something to say in the heat of the moment. It was a mere thought than a feeling, really." She said. I gave a hum. I didn't really know what to say to that. She had to feel it was some truth to it to say it. No one really just say things without having feeling behind it. "Whatever; I was thinking about something else." She said.

"Really? What?" I asked, wondering if she was going to start talking about the stars or the grass or something.

"I was thinking about how when it comes to me, you and Jasper are pretty much tied." She said. She looked at me. I guess to see my reaction for herself. I'm sure my face was covered in confusion. To be honest, I didn't know how to react to that. I really didn't understand what she meant.

"Uh?" was all I could say.

She laughed. "I can see the confusion. Perhaps, I should explain." It would nice. "You and Jasper both met my parents on accident. He doesn't know about my father, but he saw the tension between my mother and me. Both of you have been over my house, you more times than him, and I've been over both of yours, his more than yours. I consider both of your sisters my friends. I don't much care either one of your ex-girlfriends. I've even dance with both of you." She said.

I'm sorry, but I still didn't get it. "Bella, what exactly is your point?" I asked, tired of trying to solve her cryptic words.

She looked at me. "I mean, out of all those things, there is something I did with Jasper that I never did with you." She said.

It didn't take me long to figure out what she was talking about. I think I almost wanted to smile at the fact that she was bringing it up. "You never kissed me." I answered. She shook her head. "So," I cleared my throat because suddenly it filled with something. "Is there a particular reason you brought that up?" I asked.

For the first time since she turned on the light on, she stood up from the chair. She walked over to my bed and stopped at the side of it. "I need to figure some things out." She tucked a fallen curl behind her ear and wiped her cheek. "Is there a reason for that?" she said softly. "You said you had feelings, why haven you never tried?" she asked.

I knew one reason for that. "Because I'm a good guy." She gave me a look, asking me to go on and give her more. I gave a very hard sigh. "You had those feelings for Jasper, he had them for you. I could try all I wanted, but I couldn't deny it. He was my friend; I couldn't do that to him." I told her.

She tucked an imagery piece of hair behind her ear and nodded. "That's a good reason. You're a good friend." She said.

She turned away. Before she could take a step, I reached over and, and with my better hand, I grabbed her wrist. She turned back to me. "But I don't give a damn about being a good friend anymore." I told her before pulling her down to me. I reached up and closed the space between our lips.

Her lips were soft. They tasted of lipstick and I'm pretty sure they will stain mine, but I didn't care. It wasn't my first kiss, far from it; but it felt like something I remember. When I kissed Tanya, it never felt like this. Every time we kissed, I felt nothing but lust. Kissing Bella, I felt. I don't know. I can't describe it because I never felt something like it before.

The second our lips touched, my heart started pounding; harder and harder the longer we were pressed together. It got to the point where I thought I would pound through my rib cage and through my chest. I literally heard fireworks going off in my ears. Blood rushed to the tips of my finger and the tips of my toes and the top of my head, like I just run up a mountain and all my breath was leaving me, yet rushing back to me at the same time. I felt my fingers tremble against her skin as I moved my hand up to her face and cupped it under her hair, pulled her closer to me.

I tried to move my other hand to her waist, but I forgot how messed up it was. So when I tried to move it. I groaned in pain. That made her pulled away. I felt like groaning because another cause of pain.

"Um…" she cleared her throat. She touched her lips with the back of her hand and took a step back from the bed. "Perhaps you should go back to sleep." She said tucking back that fallen curl again. She turned away from me again and walked back to the chair.

"Hey," she turned back to me. "Are you staying for tonight?" I couldn't help but asked. She said everyone was at the hotel so I assumed she didn't have a ride home.

"I was, but if you don't want me to…"

"No, it's not that, I was just wondering where you're going to sleep."

She looked at the chair she was sitting in before then looked back at me. "Um, the chair." She answered with a "duh" in her voice. We both knew it was the only real solution. But I could think of another one.

"That can't be comfortable." I told her.

She laughed. "It's fine. The dress makes a good cushion for my legs and I can just ask a nurse for a blanket or something." she answered.

"Bella, you are aware I'm lying in a full size bed, right?" I pointed out. I guess it was one of the perks of having one of the Chiefs of the hospital as a father.

She looked at it then back at me. She rubbed her arm. "I know, but I don't think I should." She mumbled.

I knew what she was thinking. She was hesitant because of what just happened. . I couldn't say I blame her. But I wasn't going to push my luck I held my palms up. "I promise I won't do anything. I just want you to be comfortable since you are here for me." I told her.

"I'm sure the bed will be better than the chair." She said in a thinking tone. Without saying anything else, she sat down and lifted the bottom of her dress. She did something with her shoes before kicking them off. She dropped her dress and looked at me. "Which leg hurts again?" she asked.

"The left one." I told her. She nodded. She stood up and walked over to the bed again.

I gave a pained groan as I moved over for her. "Are you sure?" she asked.

I nodded. "It's fine." I told her. She mumbled okay before climbing on the bed and lying next to me. I careful lifted my arm and put it around her shoulders. She looked at me. "So you will not lay on it." I told her the truth. I had pieces of me missing from my arm and even through it was good excuse to put my arm on her; I didn't want her to hurt me.

She gave a chuckle before laying her head on her arm. "Go to sleep, Edward." She said.

I gave a smile before closing my eyes.

welcome to the bottom of the page.

hold on, we still have one more chp and the epilogue left. so... its prediction time! what do you think will happen in the last chp. i'm all about what other people are thinking when it comes to shows and books. so tell me what you think. i want to know.

another thing, someone said they wanted me to show you guys the dresses and the shoes. i will because i want to show you guys. but i decided that i am going to post it on the post after the epilogue. i decided, well, i actually decided a long time ago and waiting for the right time to tell you, but i am going to do a Q&A post after the epilogue post. how this is going to work is you guys are going to post questions or comments or anything else you want me to answer in the comments or you can even pm me and i will copy and past then answer them in the Q&A post. i will also answer anything that wasnt asked that i think you should. i just want to give you a look inside my head and know what i was thinking when i was writing the story. i didnt do anything like this for my first story so i think it will be fun.

i dont think i have anymore to say, but i love you guys and thank for sticking with me.

Luv & Rockets.