I am singularly unhappy about this chapter. And I just might end up deleting it if I can find a way to move my story ahead in a better way but for now, just bear with me and with my monologue!

�

Chapter 18

The night passed without another incident. BJ was still sulky and moody and unwilling to talk and I was feeling a little tired lately. Maybe it was all the missed meals and lost sleep. It had to catch up with me sometime and I knew that only I would end up paying the price. Or perhaps Potter and BJ too, but I could not care less.

Next few days were quiet and peaceful. Nobody was doing much of anything. I was bored out of my skull but felt tired and just caught up with my lost sleep mostly.

O'Hara was still being friendly to me. I was not betting on it lasting long though. She had shown her talents in the field of volatility and I wondered when her phase of affection for me would end.

There was just a trickle of casualties but nothing big because of all the hype about peace talks so life had pretty much returned to the pre-deluge insanity. Klinger was strutting in his new dress and Potter was trying to play polo but the rocky terrain and the neighboring mine field not to mention absence of any partner or opponent seriously thwarted his efforts.

Radar was keeping an eye on BJ's mail but so far, he had only received one letter since the last one before he started abusing Mulcahy's punching bag or whatever that little diddy was called these days. Finally, I had enough of his moodiness and decided to take decisive action. The worse that could happen was that he would take it out on me and not that bag but that would affect me less than his current behavior was. I knew it had been only a few months since he had come here and was probably still trying to adjust to the whole situation and I also knew that he had the tendency to turn into an erratic and irrational man as soon as something happened in Mill Valley that Peg had the stupidity to write him about. On top of that was the fact that unlike previous few times, I was not even trying hard enough to figure out what was bothering him. So today was the day!

"Beej!" I called him towards the chess board. We had not had any poker or chess in the longest time and I figured it could be a good ice breaker. With Trapper, I used to play gin draft and by the time we finished, both of us would be drunk and could sleep the sleep of the just. But with BJ, it was not yet like that. Trap and I had a long history of inebriation and wacky behavior. We could lay it on each other and not think twice. With BJ, it was very different sometimes. I was not comparing them but I felt bad not being able to help when he needed a friend.

"Yeah?" Came the monosyllabic answer.

"Would you mind joining me on this table for yet another game of chess?" I did not know why he was so tight lipped about his current problem. Or was he always this way except this time I was more sensitive to it for some reason?

"No! I am not interested." Clearly he was not busy. And was not really doing something terribly amusing unless one could call staring at Swamp's roof amusing.

"Can you at least tell me what is bothering you? I cannot stand this ...whole...depression."

"Then leave me alone. There is nothing you can do or say so why not just shut up?" That was a new one!

"Beej! This is not fair. Not to me. Not yourself. I cannot make you talk. But trust me, this way, this place will hurt you in more ways than you will ever know. You are not alone in being lonely, ya know! All of us miss our families."

"YEAH? You really think so? My little girl is growing up without me and my wife does not bother to...Never mind. Go write to your daddy and tell him all your latest escapades. And never again tell me that its the same for you missing your dad as it is for me missing my daughter! Now leave me alone."

That was uncalled for. How could I not feel offended? He really was wallowing in self-pity. And I had no idea how to pull him out of it. The idea about him looking at others and realizing that everybody else was here without families certainly backfired big time. I stared at him while he stared at the celing.

How do you help someone who does not want your help? And can break your ribs if you tried too hard?

I decided to leave him be and went outside. Maybe talking to a nurse of female persuasion help lift my mood?

How about a cup of coffee? Mess tent was bound to have some folk in there and I did not mind seeing someone who was willing to make and take a joke or two. I could feel a headache developing behind my eyes.

"Hawkeye!" Kellye waved towards me. There were three nurses on that table. Not too bad for a rotten afternoon, I thought as I carried my mug towards them.

"Hello Ladies! How may I be of service?" I seated my tuchus on one of the benches. One of them passed me sugar while the other looked at Kellye.

"What's going on? Have I missed something? Or am I about to miss something?" I did not understand the looks.

"You have new company these days and we never get to see you anymore." What was that about?

"New company? The only new company I have these days is of the rats trying to find room in my less than warm blanket. What are you trying too hard not to say?"

They all giggled. What was that all about?

"Hey! Its rude to laugh at a man when he is sitting right next to you, ya know?"

"Oh Hawkeye!" And the annoying giggle again.

Coffee was wretched, even by mess standards. It always made me wonder why they even bothered erecting this monument to disservice innocent beings? I knew I was a sinner but even I did nit deserve the kind of punishment I was put through day after day. And in the name of food, no less!

But more than anything, the mess tent mortified my senses the worst and that was saying something considering the situation we all were living in. And then I thought of Radar and the relish and devotion with which he cleaned up everything on his tray and the neighbors' too. Wasn't he amazing?

After a few exchanges of good humor and a couple more giggling fits of unknown etiology, I was done with socializing for the day and figured I should write to dad. I had received his latest letter few days back and he did not mention anything about his new nice girl. I wondered what happened? Maybe I scared her away? Or maybe it did not work out? I did not know what to write so I decided to write yet another inconspicuous letter saying much of nothing except maybe mention O'Hara and her Ben-bit. So I went back to Swamp and wrote to dad. I decided to drop the letter with Radar right away. But now what? I was all done with things I could do and now I was bored again. There just wasn't anything to do here. And when they sent us work, they sent it by bulk mail. That whole insane activity followed by an insaner inactivity...I hated it.

'What to do, what to do?' I was mumbling on my way to Radar when I remembered something I needed to ask Margaret.

"Who is it?" Came the reply at my knock.

" Prince Charming in Olive Drab!" I made my voice a little deeper and more nasal, trying to sound like Donalad. It worked because within thirty seconds the door opened with Margaret in one of her pretty little night dresses, the operational word being little, militarily speaking. I barely resisted the urge to wink and whistle.

"YOU? Its you? What do you want?" Out went all the love and joy that showed on her face for that tiniest of moments.
"Of course its me. Donald is not this good lookin'. And he must have told you, you look angry when you are pretty!" I smiled lecherously. Winking would have earned me a black eye. I knew she could give Father Mulcahy lessons on a right hook!

"Pierce, what is it? What is it that you want? And can't it wait?" She was exasperated so I did not push my luck further. Potter was not Henry and he paid heed to what Margaret had to say and after his warning few days ago, I did not need to be insolent. There were better ways to piss him off!

"It was about the OR incident. Well, not really an incident. Can I come in?"

"What incident? And NO! I can hear just fine with you outside my tent."

"Yeah? I am so tired, I might drop dead at your door step. So I will be quick. I want you to assign senior nurses to difficult patients while in OR. That nurse, O'Hara, almost cost me Hendricks. I appreciate that you wash up with Frank despite everything but please, show same diligence for rest of the unfortunates!" I was trying to sound coherent but was not sure if I was really making any sense.

"First of all, that was a rare thing that happened. I usually assign nurses that way anyway. So you don't have to tell me how to do my job based on one slip. Secondly, I know why I work on Frank's table. I don't need you to patronize me. Thirdly, are you alright? You look sick!"

The last part took me by surprise and I had to bite back all the nice things I was going to say to her about her firstly and secondly. I could never figure her out, really. One moment, she was Hitler and Stalin rolled in one package, and next, it was Florence Nightingale and my mother rolled in another. Maybe she had multiple personalities?

"I am fine. Better than when I came here. This little talk has really perked me up!" And with that, I about faced and headed away when my arm was yanked and I was about faced once more.

"Margaret, don't start something you cannot finish!" As I freed my arm from her grip.

"Your eyes are pale!" Matter of fact statement!

"What? My eyes? Can't be! Now let me go or invite in me your tent. I cannot take this standing up anymore! Especially when you are dressed to entertain."

"Pierce. Shut up for once in your life, will you? You are jaundiced, I am pretty sure."

"And you are drunk! I cannot be jaundiced. I haven't been near a contact since ever. Now, be a good girl and let me go!" And finally freed my arm again to go away.

"Come with me to Col. Potter!" God she was infuriating.

"Listen, I don't have jaundice and you cannot say I do in this light anyway. Its not a sunny morning, in case you did not notice."

With that, I left her tent and went towards Swamp. All this time, I thought about Hepatitis. It was fairly common around here but you had to have some contact. I had none. None of the patients we dealt with in last few weeks had Hepatitis or we would have been notified. But then, it was Army. But then, again, if there was a Hepatitis patient, somebody else would have had it too. I was not the only one dealing with a particular patient at any given time. Nurses, orderlies, other patients...

Margaret was just paranoid and possibly drunk, I finally decided.