I decided to continue this story and that this story will indeed be something that is more than just four or five chapters long, but I have also decided that I'm going to aim for a monthly or maybe even a bi-monthly update to this if you folks can live with it since I have other stories of mine in my main fandom that will take precedence over this. I do quite love Merrill though, so that will keep me going. Particularly since I've decided to write a story about each virtual lady that has captured a piece of my heart throughout the various games that I've played. This time it will be Merrill, but hey, maybe next time it will be Kyou from Clannad, or Emi from Katawa Shoujo?

P.S. I decided to name each chapter after a different David Bowie song.

Disclaimer: Dragon Age belongs to Bioware and its EA overlords.

One of her favorite parts of the day, something Merrill enjoyed even more than when she got up early in the morning to sing Elvhen songs to their farm animals, was when she got the chance to walk her children to school. No matter how old they were her children would always be her babies even as they would eventually grow up and leave the farm, Bethany would always be six years old with pigtails and skinned knees while Malcolm would always be that five year old who charged around naked up and about the house as he pretended that he was a Grey Warden. She hummed a happy melody and kept her thoughts to herself while she walked with Jesse at her side, and with little Tamlen holding onto her hand.

Malcolm and Bethany trailed behind her just out of earshot, whispering among themselves about something or other, and Merrill smiled to herself since she had always found it cute whenever kids, not just hers, tried to keep secrets with each other. In fact, she remembered a time where she herself had done just the same as her kids were now doing. It was back when she and Mahariel were little girls, Mahariel being the first child there that she had befriended once Merrill had been discovered to be magic and sent off to join another clan. Mahariel had gotten in trouble for beating up Tamlen, the Dalish one, and when Merrill asked Mahariel why she always insisted on attacking the boy, and why the boy seemed so determined on always being in her presence, Mahariel had very matter of factly said that it was because they were in love, but had then also warned her not to ever go tell anyone else.

It was the first secret that anyone had ever entrusted her with, and Merrill had always kept it close to mind to never reveal it. It was tragic what eventually became of the two out in that cave the two hunters had decided to explore that day, but it wasn't something that Merrill liked to think about. Instead, she decided to focus on the love aspect of it as she hummed, little Tamlen at her side beginning to hum the same tune as well.

She had had a crush or two in the clan growing up, though nothing much came of it since most of the other Dalish her age, with the exceptions of Tamlen and Mahariel, had always found her to be odd. Truth be told she never actually believed that she would ever be bonded with anyone in the clan considering that she was in training to one day become their Keeper, but the fact that she was now married, to a Human of all things, it was a milestone in life that she would have never expected. She wondered what her younger self would have said were she to go back in time and tell the little girl that she would one day mate with a shemlen, but she figured that it didn't really matter in the end. She had fallen in love with a Human and had born him Human children, and despite the fact that other Dalish would have certainly called her a traitor to their race for doing so, as the tiny person who was holding her hand hummed and marched at her side, Merrill knew that there was nothing treacherous about the choices that she had made in life.

She let her thoughts go back to her current setting once a certain school building came within sight. It wasn't where Bethany and Malcolm went to school, they had once but that was years ago, and instead it was where Merrill was going to drop off little Tamlen. She was still nervous about Tamlen going off by himself considering the fact that with each passing day it looked more and more like he had been granted the gift of magic, but Merrill took a deep breath as she prepared herself to let go of her son's hand for another day.

It took three more of those deep breaths and walking until they were just a few feet away from where the school teacher was waiting for her charges before she finally let go of Tamlen's hand, and Merrill bent down on one knee as she then turned to Jesse and whispered quietly to the Mabari. "Make sure he doesn't use any magic."

The Mabari barked in confirmation and then quickly made his way over to Tamlen's side, the youngest Hawke being his master for the day. After a hug between herself and her son, and an exchange of 'I love you', Merrill finally stood back up and watched as Jesse and Tamlen marched into the school, and as the school teacher waved her goodbye until she went to pick him up.

As a mother she was still nervous of course, but she had faith in Jesse to watch over Tamlen and make sure he didn't use magic while at school, since the vigilant Mabari had done the same for Bethany when she was young. A thought came to her at that moment that made her smile that there were those in the world that would have been shocked that she had left her son under the care of a dog, but she was a Hawke, and being a Hawke meant that you trusted dogs much more than you would anyone else.

Nodding to herself since she decided that Tamlen was going to be okay, Merrill turned around and faced her other children. "Now, lets head off to school!"

However, neither Malcolm or Bethany looked as enthusiastic as she did. Normally, despite how 'lame' they thought she was being, they usually humored her, but Merrill could tell that something was wrong when she saw the twins look at one another nervously, before they both looked at the ground. It seemed like they had something to say, but that neither one of them wanted to be the one to say it.

"Is everything okay?" Merrill asked after a minute or so of silence, her children starting to concern her.

Bethany nudged her brother, and then Malcolm nudged her back, and the process repeated a few times, before Bethany sighed and was the first one to look back up at her mom. "Malcolm and I were talking, and we were thinking that maybe you don't have to walk us to school today?"

Merrill's first instinct was to open her mouth to protest the fact that her children wanted to go off by themselves, but then she stopped herself and tried to hide her frown. She would talk with Hawke later about what just happened, but at the moment all she did was give each of them quick hug, and then she watched as they walked off towards school, the both of them giving her a sheepish wave as they left her behind. For about a minute after, all Merrill could do was just stare off in the direction that her twins had sauntered off to, before she sighed and turned to walk back home.

Nothing exciting happened on her way back, and Merrill had forced herself not to think of anything until after she was already back at the farm, and as she opened the front door of her house to walk inside, her face was completely blank. She wiped her bare feet on a rug near the front door to wipe off any loose dirt she had tracked in, especially since she walked around barefoot, and Merrill immediately went to her and James' room, not even going to pretend that she was in the mood for anything else.

Oddly enough considering that he was usually up early in the twilight hours of the morning, Hawke was lying in bed without a care in the world. He was awake, reading a book that Varric had written about the conspiracy theory going around that the Warden was the real power behind the Ferelden crown instead of King Alistair, but he really should have been out on the farm, at least for the next few hours or so. Maybe he was taking a day off, or perhaps he had finished early, but as Merrill made her way over to and plopped onto her bed in her usual spot beside James, she knew that she was too depressed to care.

It was one thing to be rejected by her clan, with the exception of a certain few people she had always been somewhat of a loner from a lot of her other clan mates, but that didn't even compare in the slightest to being rejected by one's own children. She could take the other Elves looking at her disdainfully for the whole Eluvian business and for her ending up being married to a 'shemlen', but being cast off by her own babies weighed much too heavy on her heart.

Glancing over from his book, Hawke marked the page he was on when he saw that his wife was motionless and lying face down on their bed. "Is everything okay, Merrill?"

Not moving from her position, Merrill's muffled voice barely made a sound. "My babies hate me."

Quirking his eyebrow, Hawke decided that perhaps it would be best if he just set down his book for the moment. "Come again?"

Forcing her face up from her bed, Merrill looked over at Hawke with eyes that were brimming with tears. "My babies hate me!" the Elven woman blurted out, before her eyes widened from a sudden thought as she sat fully up and grabbed onto her pointy ears. "Creators! Do they hate me because I'm an Elf?"

Had his wife not been practically hyperventilating Hawke would have laughed, but since Merrill was freaking out just a tad bit too much, he sat up as well, and rested a hand on her shoulder. "You know, they're Elves too. Except they don't have the pointy ears."

Clearly not listening to her husband, Merrill only lamented further. "They're ashamed of me. They're ashamed of their Dalish heritage."

The former Champion just sighed, and figured that he'd do his best to explain the situation to Merrill, since he too had experience with it. "They're not ashamed of you, just embarrassed that their mom walks them to school. If it makes you feel better, Carver and my sister did the same thing with my mom too."

Immediately, Merrill leaned into Hawke a bit and grabbed on hopefully to his shirt. "Really, they don't hate me?"

Lifting his hand up to wipe away some of the few tears that had gathered around her eyes, Hawke finally laughed. "They don't hate you, Ma'vhenan."

Unable to contain her new found giddiness at finding out that her babies still loved her, Merrill practically tackled her husband as she charged him for a hug. She laughed when he grunted due to not expecting the tackle, and continued to do so as they fell off their bed and as James began to laugh along with her. She gripped onto him fiercely, James tightening his own hold in return, and it was then that Merrill finally realized what she would tell her past self if she somehow ever came into contact with her. She would tell the little girl that she was going to fall in love with a shemlen, and that it would be the greatest thing that ever happened to her.

One of my biggest weaknesses when it comes to writing is the trouble I have with writing those grand adventure stories we're all so fond of. With that in mind, if someone were to go through my writing here they would see both a lot of stories focused on humor and also a lot of my slice of life style things like this story here.

If any of you have any ideas for this story I am more than open to hear them! In fact, one of the reviewers for the opening chapter actually gave me the idea of having a chapter where one of the kids runs away to go and join the Dalish.

In any case, I actually don't know if a school system exists in Dragon Age, but I decided that since we aren't told otherwise to my knowledge, that that was my green light to use it.

I appreciate all the reviews, follows, and favorites, and I will do my best not to let you folks down.

If you know any good m!Hawke/Merrill stories, let me know so I can check them out. If you have something you've written yourself, don't be afraid to demand that I read it! Haha