High School Reunion

Chapter 4

A fear of pain

Lucy sat there in shock as she stared at the ring that Sting was holding. This was the last thing she was expecting. She never imagined that he would want to get married so soon, even though she has yet to say those three little words to him. How can he be so sure that this is what he wants? Lucy herself never seemed certain of anything anymore, let alone what she wanted for her future.

She feels so overwhelmed with everything and this is just adding to her stress. Why did he decide to ask her now of all times? She wondered if this was his way of claiming her, if she truly went to the reunion. Maybe this would make him feel better, knowing she has this ring on if she were to come across him. But she feels like that ring would weigh heavily upon her whether she wore it or not. The added stress is something that she really doesn't need right now.

Sting looked at her with hopeful eyes. Anxiety was building up as he waited for her answer. What would he do if she refused? He could see the worry in her eyes, the fear. It only added to the fear he felt of being rejected. It had taken him a long time to even convince her to go on one date with him and more than likely, this was going to end the same way. He would have to prove to her that he would be a worthy husband and that she would never regret it. But it was worth it in his eyes.

"Sting." She finally spoke. Her voice nothing more than a whisper. She reached out and placed a delicate hand over his before looking deep into his searing blue eyes. His heart jumped for he knew what was coming. He could see it in her eyes, it was written clearly on her face. She wasn't ready. "I'm sorry, I can't. At least not yet."

Sting nodded, understanding how she felt. He knew that this would take some time but he was still hopeful. At least she didn't instantly reject him. After closing the small black box, he sat down on the bench next to her. She leaned into him, taking in his support. She felt completely selfish, like a spoiled brat for what she has been doing to him. He has done nothing but be there for her and this is how she repays him? She remembers her life long dream. Of her marrying the one, and living her own happily ever after but for some reason she doesn't feel as if Sting is that one.

She always heard that if she met the one, she would know it but she doesn't get that feeling with Sting. It makes her wonder if he feels that way with her because if it was meant to be, then wouldn't the feelings be mutual? There was only one time in her life that she thought she had met the one, but that didn't end well. She didn't want a repeat of what happened in the past. And even though she knew that it wouldn't be like that with him, she couldn't stop the fear that rose in her.

Once you feel pain like that, you'll never want to experience it again. That night, so many years ago, was just a mistake. Just one big drunken mistake that caused her so much pain and heartache. It cost her her last year of high school, her friends and even herself. She had changed after that, no longer as trusting as she once was. Her once warm and loving eyes were now full of hurt, pain and sorrow. She built up walls around her heart and Sting had slowly started to take them down. Now they were back up, and even bigger than before.

He could see that this was going to be a struggle. She made her walls thicker, larger and multiplied them in order to prevent such pain from reoccurring. After some time, they finally left and headed home. They went to bed with barely any words exchanged. He knew there was a lot on her mind and he shouldn't have pushed this on her. Especially in the state that she was currently in. But he felt the need rising in him to have her. As if wearing this ring would officially make her his. That night, both Sting and Lucy had trouble sleeping. Both of their minds filled with thoughts of what was to come for them in the future.

It's been a week, and things were finally starting to look normal to Sting. But little did he know of the conversation that Lucy had planned. The reunion was only one week away and she had to talk to him today. She couldn't say something to him at the last minute, it wouldn't be right. Lucy still couldn't get the silver haired beauty out of her mind. She couldn't believe how good she looked, even after all these years. It only furthered her belief that they were still together. What idiot would give her up?

She was beautiful, smart, and just all around perfect. Everything that Lucy was not. It was nearing five pm as she waited for Sting to arrive. She couldn't even focus enough to read, that's how much stress she felt. Her brain was working overtime and no matter how hard she tries, she couldn't get it to stop. She just wanted one night of restful sleep, was that really so much to ask for?

The door opened and chocolate brown eyes met with piercing blue. With a smile on his face, he greeted her but once he saw that look upon her face he knew that it wasn't something good. He had a feeling this was coming. He knew what she was going to say, it was only a matter of time. But if she was coming to him like this then it could only mean one thing.

"Sting, we need to talk." Those words were something that he never looked forward to. He nodded, knowing that there was no avoiding it. With it being only one week away, they would have to talk about it at some point. "Sting, I have decided to go to the reunion."

He understood, and he would let her go. He wouldn't dream of stopping her from doing what she wanted to do. He would never make a mistake like that again. He learned from his past, and Lucy was a big help in the process and he felt like he owed her so much.

"And, I have decided to go alone. I'm sorry, but I need to face this head on. I can't rely on you for every little thing." She hoped that he would understand. If she kept relying on him for everything then what would that make her? A coward, that's what. She wanted to be strong, and not always be so needy.

"I understand, and I support you." His words caught her by surprise. She smiled, happy that he was so supportive. He pulled her close, praying that she would come back from this okay. And most of all, that would come back to him. She was the first person to truly believe in him. She was the reason he was able to change, become the man he is today and he loves her for that. He loves everything about her and is willing to spend the rest of his life with her even if she never loves him in return.

"Thank you." With a kiss, she showed how grateful she was. The proposal still weighed heavily in the back of her mind, never truly leaving her thoughts. She wasn't sure what she wanted to do, at least not yet. But she couldn't make him wait to long for her answer. Was she going to marry him or not? She hates what she has become. She never used to be like this. The answer to everything used to be so clear, so easy. But since then nothing has been the same.

Time passed by quickly as the week seemed a blur. The next thing she knew was that the reunion was only a day away. She could feel the unease that building in Sting. The worry of what was going to happen there was something they both felt. It only seemed to build up tension between them. They talked less and less, and he spent more time at the office than before. Lucy could see that their relationship was already taking a turn for the worse and she hasn't even gone yet. What sort of strain is this going to put on them once she leaves? She was in the middle of packing her bags for the morning when he finally came home. Entering the bedroom, he paused once he was what she was doing.

"Are you sure about this?" He asked her, his voice gently yet held a certain sadness to it. She turned to face him and looked directly into his eyes. No, in all honesty, she wasn't. She had no idea of what to expect of the coming event and wasn't sure what this would do to her but knew that it had to be done.

"No, not really. But I have to." She answered. She had to face her past in order to move on to the future. There was no way of getting around it.

"Are you going to be okay?" He was worried. Worried that she would come back in worse shape than when she leaves. What would seeing him do to her? To them? She wasn't sure of that either. She wanted things to be fine, everything to go smoothly once she got there. But there was no guarantee. She couldn't promise him that things would be okay, that she would return the same. The future is something that is unpredictable and that's why she doesn't make promises.

"I don't know. Hopefully."

A/N: I wanted to thank all of you wonderful readers for just simply being you. For the reviews, the favorites, and the follows, they are all very much appreciated! I hope you all continue to enjoy my stories and please let me know what you think. I wanted to ask everyone what the preferred. Would you rather I reply to your reviews via PM or in the next chapter? Please let me know! Thanks so much, Angel