POSTING THIS BEFORE I GO TO SLEEP BECAUSE THERE IS NO BETTER WAY TO WAKE UP THEN TO REVIEWS ;-)
CHAPTER FIVE
I could feel a cloud of confusion enter the room. I shut the door behind me and straightened myself up. In my hands was a notebook which I think was mostly to hide my little handbook. I started to take my place in the direct center of the room behind Edward's desk. Emmett and Jasper were sitting on the couch. Carlisle was near the window in the corner. Edward was standing near his desk and Peter and Garrett were seated in the chairs on the other side of the desk.
"Thank you gentleman for meeting me on such short notice. I appreciate you taking time out of your busy day to speak with me even if I am not a Guard, Alpha, or Beta." I started.
"What do you know of Parcae?" Garrett looked to me and then turned his gaze to Edward.
"You know I have heard throughout my years how enjoyable and informative reading can be. I never fully understood that until yesterday." I pulled out the Tria Fata manual for all things fucked up and displayed it like the prize it had become.
"Where did you get that?" Garrett asked with a mix of shock and anger.
"I have my sources." I smiled.
"Jacqueline." Edward said with a surprisingly sly smile. "We knew her grandfather."
"Bravo." I congratulated him. "Now let's see, where should we start?" I opened the book.
"Founding fathers of your little group…very impressive; it's like the who's who of the revolutionary period." I commented.
"Bella, I think we should discuss this in private." Edward said.
"No. I think I want to discuss this here and after what I've read I think you owe me this." I rose an eyebrow in challenge.
Edward exhaled and gestured for me to continue.
"All right, I will just get meat of the sandwich."
I exaggerated clearing my throat.
"Let's see here oh yes, Virgin Bride. Virginity is of the highest integrity. Yada, yada, yada, a virgin mate is fragile in mind and soul. Don't even get me started on that phrase. Blah, blah, blah; here it is, to ensure that her fragile state of mind and soul is taken care of after her Guard passes and the Mate has had no other previous relations before the time of marriage it is imperative to initiate the Rule of the Second."
At this point no one dared make eye contact with me. That's okay; I didn't need to see the whites of their eyes to find the courage to continue.
"Now I was sitting around yesterday and I thought what the hell is the Rule of the Second, so being the newly avid reader I am, I flipped around a little bit and landed on this delicious little morsel. The Rule of Second is in regards to a Guard wishing to take a Virgin Bride as his forever Mate and wife. The Guard will choose a Second. If the Guard is unable to fulfill his duties to his mate or if the Guard passes before his Mate the Second will take the Guard's place and fulfill his duties. The Second will take the oath and promise to marry and love the Guard's wife as the Guard loved and married his mate. Now before I even dive further down the most fucked rabbit hole of my life I want to know if what I am reading pertains to me and if so...what the fuck?"
"Bella, I understand that you are feeling con…" Edward started to say but was interrupted by the sliding door to the office opening with a bang.
"Sorry I'm late guys, I just woke up…" Jacob. He slowed down once he saw me standing there in the middle of the room.
"What are you doing here?" I asked irritated.
Jacob walked slowly into the room, "I was about to ask you the same thing."
"You're Tria Fata?" I exclaimed.
Jacob let out a small breathy laugh and smiled like he had just been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. G79! Why didn't Edward tell me? Why didn't Jacob tell me? All the sudden, it slowly started to make sense. All the times Edward had asked me to give Jacob a chance. The fact he was never upset that Jacob was following after me like a lost puppy. The home invasion. Vegas. All the pieces were fitting well into the puzzle.
I flipped around to Edward so fast I was surprised my head wasn't spinning. "You picked Jacob as the Second?" I hissed.
"Gee Bells, don't sound so happy." Jacob replied sarcastically.
"Shut up, Jacob." I snapped.
I turned back to Edward. "You expect me to sleep with Jacob? I read all about the Second Union." I said while waving the book back and forth.
I turned to address the room. "At any point when you were being initiated; did any of you have one thought in your brain that this was just a tad bit fucked up? Or were you just bedazzled by promises of riches and fame."
"I'm offended, none of us ever entered into this because we wanted to be famous or rich. If you fully read the book there are chapters dedicated to our loved ones and the lengths we will go to always love, protect and honor our mates." Garrett replied.
"It is vital that an emotional and physical union is created between the Mate and her Second" I read aloud. "Now, does this go into the loving your mate section or honoring your mate section? You'll need to forgive me as I'm sure you already know I have a fragile virgintastic mind and soul. I tend to be confused sometimes."
"Bella, the Second Union is no longer practiced. It's antiquated." Carlisle spoke up.
"This whole book is antiquated." I shouted. "I can go out to Sunset Boulevard and do a survey of a thousand random women and I think we all know that if I were to ask them if their husbands, mates or boyfriends spanked them in a non-sexual manner; just how many of that thousand would answer yes? Even with this being Hollyweird I highly doubt I could find one."
I turned back to Jacob. "Look, I don't care about what oath or merit badge you earned by agreeing to this. I will just tell you now, if you were planning on waiting around for Edward's sloppy seconds then that will never happen…like ever. I am not some sort of human beverage where you can just take swig and then pass it off the next guy."
"This was my choice, Bella." Jacob said softly.
"Well now you have a whole world of choices in front of you, I release you from your "duties." You are going to go off and find your own little soul mate, you're going to marry him or her and makes babies and live happily ever after, whether you like it or not."
Jacob shook his head slightly, disbelieving.
"Jacob, this is never going to happen. In fact if something were to happen to Edward. Tria Fata be damned if I would ever remarry into this society again. It is up to me what happens after my "Guard's" demise. I could become a lesbian; I could jump off a fucking bridge; whatever it is that I decide to do, it will be up to me. I won't care if you are some big Alpha, the most you will ever be to me is like some lovable kid brother which that is even on thin ice at this point since you have pretty much been lying to me ever since I met you."
I looked around at the men in the room; each of them wouldn't look at me. They all looked like they were waiting to be called into the principal's office.
"I read this book and yes overall I can find some merit in what it is you all wish to accomplish. So, you may commence with your little group meeting but leave me and my future out of this. Emmett." I waited until Emmett's eyes made contact. "I think you should know that I shared with Rose some portions of this book. I think if you all cared for your wives and girlfriends the way you say you do then you should be able to level the playing field and share this with them. You follow these teachings and practice love and protection for your mates and families but what you failed to practice was truth. You expect us to all just blindly follow your rules but you give us no valid reason to do so. But heck what do I know? I am no Guard or Alpha or Beta so my words probably mean little to you but I am a human being and you will no longer make decisions for me." I started to take leave.
"Can we at least have our book back?" Garret questioned.
"No. I think I'll be holding onto this for a little while." I replied.
"It belongs to the Tria Fata." He argued.
"No, it used to belong to the Tria Fata, until Jacqueline's grandfather passed away and left her all of his processions. Since this book was in his procession, it was up to Jacqueline to decide what to do with it. She gifted it to me, so now the book is mine. However if you would like to bring up the legality of my claim we can always call law enforcement and have them sort this out. I happen to have one on speed dial, I'm sure my father would love to hear all about this."
Garrett was pissed. I could see the tension just roll off of him in waves. I was just to the door when something popped into my head. I paused for a minute and then slowly walked back over to Edward. I stood in front of him and I could see his eyes clouded, with what I wasn't sure. He didn't look upset but he wasn't happy either. I pulled my rings off from around his neck; the silver necklace was long enough where I didn't have to undo the clasp.
I took the book and placed it on the desk in front of everyone and then placed my rings on top of it.
"Edward, you can either return these items to me or you can keep them. I'm sure you'll need to take into consideration what your Alpha…Beta brothers wish. Good day, gentlemen."
As soon as I closed the door and walked a couple of paces, I could feel my body sag with relief that it was over. Well, I think that went well. I remember feeling at that moment that I wasn't pissed at Edward. I remember feeling surprised by that. I was plenty pissed yesterday but now I couldn't even describe my feelings. I guess because for the first time I felt empowered. I knew that Edward would make the right decision. Part of me even fell a little more in love with him at that moment because, when it came down to it I had faith that Edward would choose me over Tria Fata. He would give up his career and wealth for me. It was the first time in our relationship where I truly thought that Edward was justified in his love for me. Before it never made sense that he would choose someone like me but now I understood.
"Bella, hold up." Jacob jogged after me.
I turned to face him. After everything I had learned; I think I was upset with Jacob the most. "What do you want, Jacob?" I snapped.
He put the brakes on surprised. "Uh…I…look, I know you're mad. I get it, but…" he huffed.
"Can you move this along, I haven't got all day. At this point Jacob, I feel betrayed and I don't know if I can even be friends with you."
"Just hear me out." Jacob pleaded. "What I'm trying to say is that I didn't know when I took that oath if I would ever be called upon to be a Second. But when Edward asked me, I regretted making that decision. My dad loved my mother and then he watched as cancer ate away at her. He was miserable, and at the time; I remember thinking that I never wanted to feel that type of pain so I took the oath. Edward asked me to come out to L.A. and meet you. The whole trip here I was pissed that I had the potential to end up with you; even though I never even knew you. But, then I met you and you were just so determined to hate me..."
"I didn't hate you. I was irritated by you." I clarified.
"And I think I'm in love with you."
I stood there with my mouth open in some sort of trance. This was so not where I thought my day would lead. I slowly swallowed, "Jacob, I…" I sighed.
"I love Edward. That will never change. I am one thousand percent sure of this. Even if something were to happen to Edward; I would not be able to love another person the way I love him. I love you but only as a friend. I'm sorry…I'm sorry." I turned from him and as fast as my short little legs could go I ran up toward my bedroom.
How is it that a person could go their whole life without any sort of male attention and then I turn twenty-three and I have suitors lining the hallways? Was God trying to make up for lost time? I sat down on the bed trying to process the past couple of days. I could see now why people said, "I need a drink."
I did love Jacob, he had become family to me but I would never love him the way I loved Edward. I was of course upset with him; I know what you're thinking, Edward was just as much to blame as Jacob but I guess I had come to accept that Edward kept things from me. Hell I kept things from Edward but Jacob was my friend and I held him to a higher standard.
The bedroom door opened and Edward walked in slowly. I didn't miss the book and silver chain in his hands.
"Hey, I think this belongs to you." Edward held out the book to me. I reached to take the book and necklace but he only gave me the book.
"I told you that I want to earn the honor of your hand back. I don't think I have yet so I want to keep hold of these for right now."
I was a little shocked by Edward's words but I nodded anyway.
"So I guess we need to talk." He said.
"Yeah, I knew you kept things from me. I wasn't stupid enough to think that you belong to some secret society and you were going to just privy me to all the information but I have to say that the bombshell I read about is a pretty big deal, Edward. Even if you no longer practiced the Second Union you were going to eventually tell me about Jacob, right? You did realize that I may have a word or two on the subject?"
"A word ? I was expecting an essay but, yes; I was planning on telling you. I was hoping that you would get to a point where you would love Jacob and understand why I did it. You once told me that you didn't know how you were going to go on living after I was gone. It was for that reason that the Second idea was ever put in the book to begin with. I love you, Bella. Do you think that it would make me happy if I were to die and you killed yourself or became a shell from depression. I want you to have a long happy life, even if I'm not in it. Being a Second doesn't necessarily mean that Jacob would marry you. Yes at one time; that was the practice. You are talking about days when people's lives were shorter; there was war going on. My hope for Jacob was when I am gone he will be there by your side, his promise to me is to make sure that you are taken care of after I am gone in whatever capacity you need him in."
"That's all well and good, but I don't want to take Jacob's life away because of some oath he took. I would be responsible for him never getting married or falling in love with someone and I am not okay with that."
"I know, sweetheart."
"I'm a little surprised on how well you are taking this. I pretty much just outed your group and broke what I am sure was some sort of code."
"I'm not upset with you. I think I am…proud of you." He evaluated.
"Proud?" I exclaimed.
"Yes. Proud. The way you stood up in that room and handled it. I have to say that it kinda turned me on?"
I looked at him in disbelief, but there was no doubt about it; Edward's eyes were frosted over in lust. I guess I can't blame him; it had been almost a month since we made love last time. I'm pretty sure at this point my virginity probably grew back as well but I couldn't allow us to go off a different direction.
"Just answer me this question; how would you feel if I designated a person for you to take over my duties if I were to die before you. Let's say, Becky. I have chosen Becky to follow in my footsteps so to speak."
Edward laughed a little, "Bella, that's gross. She's sixteen."
"Well, I wasn't planning on dying tomorrow. I'm sure I could hold out for at least two more years if not four. So here you go, I died and I hold up on silver platter to you a younger, newer model which is yours for the taking. Who cares about love, I'm sure in time you can find some love for her. How does that feel?"
"Well, if I was able to provide you with a somewhat content life; my job would be done." He stated.
"So it's okay for you to kill yourself but I'm just supposed to suffer here with Jacob?" I questioned dryly.
"I wouldn't kill myself but I probably just return to Italy and live my days out there."
"I guess I must love you more than you love me. I can't even imagine my life without you." I was joking but I don't think Edward took it that way.
"If you truly loved me the way you say you do; you would live. Someday we will have children; I would hope that you wouldn't abandon them because of me."
"I guess you're right. I just can't even picture myself having more kids."
Edward gave me a look so fast; I was surprised that my skin didn't melt off.
"I'm kidding." I laughed.
"Don't say those things." He exhaled.
"Geez Edward. I'm sure in a few years you'll talk me into pushing out a kid or two."
"A few years?" he asked in disbelief.
"Well yeah, I mean I will want to establish my career first. I never want to be one of those mothers who have to hire nannies. I want my children to know me."
"Honey, I am almost forty, I would like to be able to play with my children before they have to put me into a home." He replied.
"The way I look at it, I could change their diapers while changing yours. Wouldn't it be easier if I just buy a one size fits all and then line you up in some sort of Ford assembly line?"
Edward narrowed his eyes at me making me aware that he was not amused by my witticism.
"When were you thinking we would try?" I asked wearily.
"I was thinking next year. You know a honeymoon baby."
I could feel my heart start to speed up. "Uh…what?" I exclaimed. "But…but I just started my career. I mean, what?"
"Well…I just want…"
"Edward, you already have a career. You have had the opportunity to be able to accomplish things in life. If I have kids now, I will never be able to accomplish anything."
"Bella, you're being over dramatic. People's lives don't just stop once they have kids. Look, at this point we're not even engaged so I guess it doesn't make sense to discuss this now. Maybe we can find a compromise." Edward sighed.
I knew how Edward's compromises worked in the past and you could be sure to believe that this new Bella would not accept less than a fair compromise.
"Wouldn't this be the kind of thing that people should discuss before they agree to marry?" I asked.
"You're right. I just don't want to fight with you right now. I just got you back and amazingly I survived the inquisition downstairs. I don't know how much longer my luck will hold out." He admitted.
"I agree. You have no idea just how thin the ice got for you, yesterday. I was ready to skin you alive. The only thing that kept me going was knowing I hatched this big plan and I wanted to see it to fruition."
"Well thank you for allowing me to keep my skin. You have no idea how much I appreciate that."
"Oh trust me I do. We're almost coming up on winter here; the last thing I needed was sky rocketing heating bills because you went skinless for the season." I replied.
"Bella, you're so weird." Edward laughed.
"Yes I am. But you love me for it. Now who's the weird one?" I giggled.
We laughed together but then when the laughter was done it left me in thought.
"What about Jacqueline? She isn't in any kind of danger for what she has done?" I asked.
"What? No. Of course not. Jacqueline even though she doesn't know this; is under our protection. Before her grandfather Robert passed away; he made sure that Jacqueline would be taken care of. Since his wife and only daughter passed away already, he made sure that Jacqueline would always be looked after by us. The money she received from her "grandfather's" account was Tria Fata money. The house we gifted her as well. Yes all of the processions inside the house are his to do what he wishes. If I ever truly left Tria Fata; all of our processions would be ours to keep. The house I gave to you for your birthday is under your name and therefore unable to be touched by the Tria Fata. Some people may not have been happy that Jacqueline refused to give the book back but we took an oath to protect her. We will always be here for her."
"So if I may ask, what happened after I left? Did they boot you from the club? Take away your letterman's jacket? Unbrand you? Make you wear a Scarlett letter?" I was trying to keep the mood light. I didn't know how much he would still tell me of his little secret society.
Edward sighed, "Well of course Garrett wanted to take the book back. But Jasper and Emmett fought against it. They said that if you were willing to take me back then that was the prevailing factor. I didn't care what they fought about as far as I was concerned; it was up to me and there was no way I was going to choose wrong. I got your message loud and clear, my loyalties are with you, Bella."
"I knew you would choose me. It wasn't my intention to give you an ultimatum. You know how I feel about them but I needed you to know that I was being one hundred percent serious. I will not have my life defined by what men wrote a couple hundred years before me."
"I understand." Edward leaned in to me and softly laid his lips on mine, like he was testing the water. I encouraged him by applying a tad bit more pressure. Edward gently placed his hand on my face and applied more pressure. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him on top of me and just like that we were back to making out like a bunch of horny teenagers.
A knock came at our door.
"Bella. I want to talk with you." It was Jacob.
I pulled my lips off Edward.
"Jacob, I swear to god if you don't leave us alone this minute; the only Second Union between you and me will be my fist colliding with your face." I yelled.
Edward laughed a little and I pulled him back down on top of me. I was still not ready to make love but I think we could progress to second base.
AN: THANK YOU FOR READING AND REVIEWING...I'M SURE I MAY RECEIVE MIXED REVIEWS ON THIS CHAPTER HOWEVER I HAD FUN WRITING IT. THANK YOU AGAIN FOR ALL OF YOUR SUPPORT.
P.S. I AM GOING TO VEGAS THIS WEEKEND SO I AM NOT SURE IF I WILL BE ABLE TO POST ON SUNDAY, IF NOT THEN MONDAY.