Author's Note:
This was Smithers' first to Burns Manor as an official guest. Burns gives Smithers a tour of the plant, and we start to see some of Smithers' habits, like ending dang near every sentence with "sir" emerge. Fans of the Simpsons will also remember Smithers kind of has a thing for cowboys, and the western theme. He is an enthusiastic square-dancer. In one Deleted Scene that won't be shown here, Burns took young Smithers to a rodeo.
Burns also buys Smithers a horse, though he acts as if that horse has always been at the stables. In many of these flashbacks, the reader had a chance to see Burns' character emerge, and realize how much he actually does for Smithers behind the scenes.
Waylon Smithers pedaled his bicycle up to the gates of Burns Manor. He'd been here once before. He'd planned to sneak in and go exploring, but was quickly found and caught by the manservant, Johan.
From the way Johan had acted, Smithers was sure he'd get in all manner of trouble. Instead, he'd simply been brought before Mister Burns. Instead of demanding to know what he was doing there, Burns had asked, surprisingly normally, does your mother know you're here?
Smithers shook his head in confusion. All the things to ask, and that was what he was most concerned about? Then Burns had given him a snack, and sent him home. Simple as that.
Still, Smithers felt his heart pounding in his chest. It was one thing to try and sneak in unnoticed. It was another to ring the front bell.
He stopped by the call box built into the gate post and pushed the button marked 'call.' There was a ringing tone, then a click. "Yes," came Johan's softly accented voice through the speaker.
"It's me, Waylon Smithers. I'm here to see Mister Burns."
The callbox buzzed, and the gate silently swung open. Smithers went in, and the gates closed noiselessly behind.
If Burns Manor had looked large at night, the afternoon sun showed off the true scale of the place. Set atop Mammon Hill, Burns Manor was a monumental structure; probably the largest Smithers had ever seen. The driveway Smithers was biking up came in a half-circle, with the mid-point leveled off in front of the main entrance. The driveway then continued its gentle arc, connecting the East and West gates in the front wall.
The building itself had at least two wings that Smithers could see. The roof over the front entry way was supported by six massive columns. At the top of the manor was an multi-windowed dome, nearly doubling the height of the building.
Smithers coasted to a stop at the bottom of the flight of steps leading to the front door. He glanced around nervously. He took a deep breath, steeled his nerves, and started up. Before he reached the top, the doors opened, and Burns stepped out, followed by Johan.
"Waylon, my boy, so nice of you to come and visit."
"Thank you," Smithers replied, "Thank you, sir," he corrected himself.
Johan caught Smithers' eye, and gave a nod of approval. He loped down the front steps to retrieve Smithers' bike. Effortlessly, he slung it over his shoulder, and brought it up to the top of the stairs.
Burns waited until Johan was back. "So, I'm sure you're thirsty from the ride over. Whatever you want to eat or drink, let Johan know, and you may have it."
"Uh, may I have a glass of water, please?" he asked, looking at Burns.
"Absolutely." Burns did nothing.
Oh, thought Smithers. He turned to Johan. "May I have a glass of water?"
Johan nodded once. "Come with me," he said. "I will show you the kitchens."
Smithers glanced over at Burns, who made a go on gesture with his hand. Smithers padded behind Johan, expecting to see the same kitchen he'd been in once before the night Johan caught him on the grounds. Instead, they didn't go down any stairs to the lower levels.
Johan lead him through an immense formal dining hall, and through a set of swinging doors, into the main kitchens. It was nothing like the servants' kitchen Smithers had been hauled into before. Everything was gleaming steel and cast iron. The stove itself was a huge wood burning, cast iron affair.
Johan grabbed a glass from a cupboard, and filled it from the faucet. He handed it to Smithers, then lead the boy to a walk-in freezer. He opened the latch, took a small pick and hammer, and chipped a few flakes of ice off a large clear block. He deftly put the ice flakes into Smithers' glass, and shut the door.
"Thank you," Smithers said, taking a long sip.
He took a moment to look around the kitchen. There were several other people there, a chef and two kitchenhands. They ignored him and Johan completely. Johan gestured to the door, and Smithers followed.
They joined Burns, who had made his way to a sunlit parlor at the southwest end of the manor. A small plate of cheese and fruit had been set out. Burns gestured to a chair. Smithers sat down. Johan continued to stand.
Smithers sipped his water, feeling terribly self-conscious of this orthodontic headgear. He wouldn't have to wear it much longer, only two more months. After that, he'd just be wearing braces. Not ideal, but better than headgear.
He took a piece of cheese and munched on it slowly.
Burns was watching him, his face unreadable.
Smithers smiled, hopefully.
Burns' expression softened ever so slightly. Encouraged, Smithers took a moment to look at the man, scrutinize him. His hair was thin, silver. Eyes a piercing blue. His features were hawk-like, aristocratic. He held his hands folded on the table before him. Smithers couldn't help but notice Burns' long, slender fingers, free of any adornment.
"Thank you for coming over, Waylon," he said regally. "I'm glad you chose to stop by. Please make yourself at home. I don't want you to feel like a stranger here."
"Your house is so big," Smithers said, glancing around the parlor at the paintings on the walls, the hand-carved Victorian furniture.
"It feels cozy once you get to know it," he replied.
Smithers nodded. "I bet if you played hide and seek here you could get lost for days."
Burns gave a shrug. "Weeks, even."
Smithers gulped.
"But don't worry, we won't let you get lost. Johan here knows the manor almost as well as I do. I'll give you the grand tour once you've finished your snack."
"Yes, please… sir!" Adding 'sir' was a bit of an afterthought, but Smithers wasn't sure how better to address the man. Throughout the small meal, Johan remained stoically at Burns' left shoulder, neither speaking nor moving. Smithers finished eating, noticing Burns barely touched a bite. He set his napkin on the table, and slid his plate away.
Burns' eyes flicked over Smithers. He stood, pushing his chair back, and made a come here gesture to the boy. Smithers got up, stealing another glance at Johan as he walked over next to Burns. "I'll give you the tour. Johan will clean up."
Johan gave a half-bow. "Yes, Herr Burns."
Burns resisted the urge to put his hand on Smithers' shoulder as he led the boy through Burns Manor. He showed Smithers the various halls and galleries, the library and solarium. He didn't show Smithers the residential wing, or the servants' levels. "There's a laboratory in the basement," he explained as they headed out to the back veranda.
"Like a science lab?"
"Exactly like that."
"What do you do down there?"
Burns shrugged. "Not much these days, a few little hobbies here and there, little projects in horticulture," he twirled his hand in the air. "Nothing exciting."
They walked down the steps and into the formal gardens. The afternoon sun was still hot, but a cool breeze was blowing in from the west, making everything remarkably pleasant. Burns watched Smithers drag his hand over the tops of the flowers as they walked deeper into the estate grounds.
Burns gestured to the left. "Those are the stables. I keep a few thoroughbreds, though I don't race them. I used the have more, but I put them up in claims races. Horses are a fine hobby, but like many, they can grow stale with time." That, and I have no one to ride with, he added in his own head. He stopped suddenly. A brilliant idea came to mind.
"Say, Waylon, would you ever be interested in learning to ride a horse?"
"Me… sir? I've never even seen one up close. Except in circuses and stuff."
Burns smiled. "We'll have to teach you. I was quite the equestrian back in my day."
Smithers eyes lit up. "Like a cowboy?"
Burns shrugged. "Dressage. And the occasional fox hunt."
Smithers wrinkled his face. "Dressage…"
"Do you even know what 'dressage' is?" Burns asked with a chuckle.
"It's…" the boy paused and blushed, "uhm… something to do with dresses."
Burns laughed aloud. "Heavens no, Waylon! Not at all. It's a form of horsemanship that requires a high degree of mastery of both horse and rider!" Burns raised his hand up. "Why, it elevates the sport of riding into one of art! The weightless floating trot, the rider atop his dancing horse!"
Smithers gave Burns a look that reminded him of the boy's father. A sort of sidelong smile that bordered on a playful smirk. "Dancing horses? I think I like cowboys better."
Burns laughed, and clapped Smithers on the shoulder. "Well, to each his own, my boy. We can't all be rodeo stars." Burns gestured to a building off to the right of the stables. "There's the kennels. I'd advise you not to go down that way. The hounds are not the most welcoming of visitors."
He guided Smithers away from the stables, down a path that looped back to the main gardens.
That evening, after Smithers had gone home, Burns summed Johan to him. "Get me a horse. Specifically a placid trailhorse. I want it procured and brought to the stables immediately. Now, go."
Johan nodded. "Yes, Herr Burns."
By the next afternoon, the stables at Burns Manor had one more resident: a buckskin quarter-horse mare. Burns gave Johan strict instructions to make sure the horsemaster, and all other staff, acted as if the buckskin had always been there. It would hardly do, Burns thought quietly, if Smithers knew he'd bought a horse specifically for him. No. Best the boy not know such things. It would hardly do to spoil the lad.