Don't take that sinner from me
Chapter 22: Where did it go wrong?
A/N: I own nothing except my mistakes. We're nearing the end! Which is absolutely insane. But, thank you all so much for your love and support and all the incredibly sweet reviews! They all brighten my day so much.
It was so surreal, knowing that she was soon headed off to Hogwarts where her friends weren't present, where her former Headmaster was no longer ruling over the school.
Sure, a lot had changed over the past few years, but she never expected it to end up like this. Never did she dare to think she would end up as Snape's wife, or even develop an interest for him for that matter. And never had she ever imagined Hogwarts without Dumbledore. But it all happened nonetheless, and she was now supposed to live her life as if nothing was wrong.
But everything was wrong. Her friends were going to pursue their plan tomorrow, and God knows how that was going to end. And all she could do is pretend like she had no idea of their existence, pretending that nothing was out of the ordinary of her messed up life.
"Hey, Hermione, mind if we sit here?" The boy's voice ripped her out of her thoughts and Hermione averted her gaze to the compartment door, watching Neville standing in the doorway with a sheepish smile on his face, Luna and Ginny standing behind him.
Hermione smiled weakly, "But of course, take a seat." They all entered the compartment and Ginny took her seat next to Hermione, with Luna and Neville taking their seats in front of her. "How are you doing, Hermione?" Ginny asked and Hermione faked a smile, "I'm doing rather well, considering the circumstances." Ginny nodded unconvinced but knew not to press the matters with the other two around.
"Have you by any chance heard of Harry?" Neville asked and Hermione shook her head, "I wish I did, Neville, but I have no idea where they are. All I know is that they're safe." Neville nodded and turned to Luna, getting into a hushed conversation about the Quibbler.
Ginny had eventually joined as well in their conversation, and Hermione focused her eyes back on the window, watching the scenery flash by with their speed, causing her to fall into a peaceful slumber.
"Hermione!" She jolted awake as she wearily looked around her, eventually landing her eyes on the red haired girl hanging over her. "Finally, I've been calling your name for ages." She grumpily said and then threw clothes into her arms, "We're almost there." Hermione looked at the others and noticed that they were already dressed into their robes. With a sigh, she got into her own and by the time she was done, they had come to a stop.
Taking a deep breath, she prepared herself for the year that was waiting for her. The castle already looked way darker from the distance she could see it, and it wasn't because it was now dark outside. There was this gloom around it, and the dark figures flying around the castle were unmistakable: Dementors.
They were carried to the castle in the carriages, where everyone kept silent with the exception of some Slytherins chattering away in the distance. A sudden cold surrounded her as they neared the castle, the mist blurring their view of the castle. Most students were stiff in their seats, waiting anxiously to arrive at the castle. It was written clear on their faces that they regretted coming to Hogwarts.
The carriages came to a halt, and everyone hurried out upon seeing the nasty smiles on the faces of the Death Eaters, ready to punish whoever was moving too slow for their liking. They were all forced into a straight line, that went all the way to the back.
Marching, they moved to the castle, taking their respective seats at the benches in the Great Hall. Hermione's eyes glided to her husband, who was looking briefly at her in return. He nodded curtly to her and she nodded in return, swallowing nervously as she felt highly out of place.
The Hall was dead silent, and Hermione felt tremendously sorry for the first years that were fearfully entering the Hall. Never would they enjoy their first year as pleasantly as the others had. Professor McGonagall pursued the sorting as usual, trying to make them feel at home as best as she could, but even she couldn't do all that much to lighten the mood.
Quiet chattering spread through the room as they all ate their dinner. "Hermione, meet me in my office after you're finished." A low voice behind her spoke, and the Hall fell quiet as everyone looked at the couple.
Turning around, she looked into the eerily cold black eyes of her husband, and nodded slowly. With that, he strode out of the Hall and Hermione turned back to her food, ignoring all the staring eyes.
Many people were either throwing hatred or curious looks at her. After all, she was the wife of the man that was now Headmaster of Hogwarts, and nobody liked how the school had turned out so far.
Finishing her dinner quickly, she left the Great Hall, stopping in the middle of the corridor when she started to wonder which office he referred to. Considering he was now Headmaster, she guessed that the Headmaster's office was her best choice. So, with that she followed the familiar way through the castle, until she ended up at the stone Gargoyles.
Cursing under her breath, she realized that she totally forgot to ask about the password. What in the world could Snape set as his password? "Slytherin." she tried hesitantly, but the Gargoyle didn't budge. "Headmaster." It sounded absolutely stupid so she was not surprised that it didn't work. Then realization dawned on her, and she tried once more. "Dumbledore."
The Gargoyles permitted her entrance and she sighed in relief, moving up the stone staircase and stopping at the wooden door, knocking once and waiting for approval. The door suddenly swung open, and Hermione caught Snape lowering his wand.
Taking this as an invitation to come in, she entered the office and watched the newly added painting on the wall. Dumbledore was currently sleeping in his chair, a content smile on his face. Although, the lack of breathing movements gave her the impression that he was only pretending to be sleeping.
"You wanted to see me?" Hermione asked and Snape pointed at the chair in front of him. "Sit down." She sighed, as she muttered a "You really need to work on your manners." The chuckle coming from the portrait near her confirmed her formed suspicions as she watched Dumbledore's chest rise and fall.
"This is not the time to lecture me on my manners, Miss Granger." Hermione sighed as she took a seat in front of his desk. "Severus, what's wrong?" She softly asked and she watched his features soften slightly, and she gave him a reassuring smile to urge him on. "I need you to control yourself this year, Hermione." His voice was cold but his eyes told her that he was only trying to sound stern, hoping to emphasis the importance of the message.
"Control myself? What is that supposed to mean?" His eyes turned stern once more and his voice was linked with coldness. "It means that there shall be no talking unless spoken to, and no angering the Carrows." His voice was threatening and Hermione swallowed. It wasn't anger he was displaying – it was worry. "They have no mercy, especially not for someone like you."
Hermione's face turned as cold as his and she raised a threatening eyebrow, "Someone like me?" Snape sighed in frustration and his upper lip twitched in annoyance.
"Hermione, today is not the day to anger me. Yes, someone like you. A Muggleborn who has been turned into a Death Eater. You're a disgrace to him and any of his followers, and on top of that, you're friends with the boy he desperately wants dead." Hermione sighed and let her eyebrow fall. "Severus, are you okay?" She asked worriedly as she took in his unsettled demeanour.
"Don't bother about my well-being. Now, head to the dungeons. You still have three minutes left. If it so happens you get caught, you will regret not following up my advice." Hermione nodded in understanding and got out of her seat, walking around the desk and stopping behind his chair.
Wrapping both her arms around him, she allowed her head to rest on his left shoulder. Observing the way his entire body seemed to relax, and from this closeup look she could see his features soften gradually. "Goodnight, Severus." She whispered in his ear and planted a soft kiss on his cheek before retreating.
Taking in the portrait on the wall before she left, she caught the everlasting twinkle in Dumbledore's eyes as he winked at her with a mischievous smile on his face. Great, she had completely forgotten about him for a second.
Leaving the office, she hastened her speed as she walked through the corridors, which were all deserted as she only had a minute left to arrive at the quarters before she'd pass curfew.
Running the last few feet, she arrived panting at the Potions classroom and cursed profusely under her breath at Snape. This was the second time he had left her standing outside because she didn't know the password. And she doubted that this time she would be able to guess it.
With a sigh, she let herself fall into the chair near the window, where last year she had spent a great deal of time practicing with her husband. It was crazy to think that they had grown so much closer over those few months, and she wondered if they could keep it up now that they weren't living together every minute of the day anymore.
"You truly do fall asleep wherever you please, don't you?" The low voice near her ear got her jolting awake as she wearily looked around her, managing to make out the dark set of robes in the dimly lit room. "I thought I told you to go to the quarters." Hermione scoffed as she pushed herself out of the chair, following Snape to the door. "Bit hard to do if I don't know the password."
Snape nodded understandingly, and muttered the password loud enough for her to hear. "Insufferable know-it-all." Hermione watched in astonishment as the door flung open and Snape smirked at her when he watched her standing in the doorway with her mouth hung wide open.
"You did not!" She hissed as she stormed into the room, hitting him lightly on the chest and he let out a low chuckle. "As you can see, I did." Hermione growled, "And why would you?" His smirk widened, "It's a token of my love." He uncharacteristically teased and Hermione softened her features as she rolled her eyes.
"Why, I sure am a lucky girl." She said sarcastically as she headed to her bedroom door, and closed it without saying a goodbye. At least one of them was having fun that night. Although, as she changed into her pajamas she knew that wasn't entirely true. She couldn't even begin to imagine how difficult it must be for him to see Hogwarts turn out like this.
Hogwarts had been a home to him as much as it had been to any other student attending the school. And even though he would never admit it to anyone, he did care about the safety of his students. And at the moment, there was little he could do to provide it.
All day she had been nervously attending her classes the next day, but it wasn't because of the grim mood that was planted in the classrooms – the punishments that were easily thrown at people who even dared to talk back or refused to do something that was required of them.
No, it was because at the moment Harry and Ron were pursuing her plan, and God knows how that would turn out. She had been fumbling with the coin in her pocket all day, waiting for it to heat up and inform her on how it went. But the coin remained cold.
But then, at last, it heated up and without anyone noticing, she sneaked a peak at it. It displayed a message that had immediately transferred into Runes. Normally, they only used it for appointments, and therefore only needed to show the time. But since they now needed to play it a lot more safe, they had to conceal their messages by a protective spell.
Luckily as it may be, Hermione had always been rather excellent in reading runes and therefore managed to translate in just a couple of seconds: Got the locket. Casualties. Grimmauld not safe. Hermione's eyes widened and cleared her throat silently, shooting her hand in the air and interrupted professor Flitwick from his explanation.
"Yes, Miss Granger?" He piped and Hermione tried to sound as convincing as she could as she spoke: "Sir, may I be excused for a second? I don't feel very well." Her professor's face turned into worry and he nodded vigorously, "But of course, my dear." Hermione smiled weakly at him, "Thank you." She mumbled as she hurriedly picked up her bag with her books and practically ran out of the classroom.
Trying not to make her footsteps heard through the corridors, she hid in the shadows as her eyes scanned her surroundings constantly. Hermione needed to get to the headmaster's office – she needed to talk to Snape.
Having successfully reached the third floor without being caught by the Carrows, she ran to the Gargoyle's and quickly muttered the password, taking the spiral stairs up. Without knocking, she barged into the room and dropped her bag when she had reached his desk.
"Hermione?" Snape asked as his face shot up, and Hermione gasped for air as she tried to calm her heart rate down. "The plan I told you about – they managed to do what needed to be done.. but there have been casualties. I need to-.." Hermione was cut off when Snape held up his hand and then the door behind her swung open, displaying Amycus Carrow. He must have seen her hurry up the stone steps as she ran for his office.
"And what do you suppose you're doing, Mudblood? Don't you have classes?" Amycus said slyly, approaching her slowly with a nasty grin on his face, one that showed victory. "I happen to have news on Harry Potter." Hermione stated calmly, willing herself to not get angry at the title he used to address her.
The victory quickly left his face as an eagerness replaced it, "Now, did you really?" Hermione nodded. "I contacted my husband as soon as I could, hoping he might arrange a meeting with the Dark Lord for me." Hermione improvised and turned to look at Snape, who was looking at her intriguingly.
"Unfortunately, as it may be, the Dark Lord is currently travelling the world. Unless you see your information relevant enough, I'd advice reconsidering that decision." Snape spoke and Hermione swallowed as she nodded. "What information do you have?" Amycus went on eagerly and Hermione calmly turned back to him. "News on his latest whereabouts."
"And how exactly did you get your information whilst in class?" Amycus suspiciously said and Hermione raised a cold eyebrow. "I don't think it matters how I get my information. All that matters is that I do."
"Now, if you don't mind, Amycus, I'd like to have a word with my wife." Snape said calmly and Amycus growled in disappointment, leaving without another word. "Do you know where they are at the moment?" Hermione shook her head as she sat down on the chair with a sigh. "All I know is that they told me that Grimmauld isn't safe any longer."
Snape stood up as he considered this for a second and then walked to the window, staring out of it thoughtfully. A sudden idea struck her, "Wait a second!" She exclaimed and he turned to her in surprise, raising a questioning eyebrow. "I put Phineas Nigellus Black's portrait in the bag they carry, just in case!" He seemed to understand what she was going on at as he hurried to one of the portraits hanging on the wall.
"Phineas..-" The man in the portrait held up a hand in a bored manner, "I heard you two. I shall not be your errand boy." Snape growled dangerously, "You will be whoever I want you to be, Phineas." The two men stared at each other darkly, but eventually the portrait gave in. "Alright, then." He said and the man walked away, leaving behind a black portrait.
They waited in silence for a while, Hermione nervously fumbling with her skirt as she impatiently waited for the man to return. At last, he reappeared in his portrait, "Headmaster! They are currently camping in the Forest of Dean!" He said and Hermione and Snape immediately made eye contact. "How am I supposed to get out of the school?"
Snape seemed rather hesitant at what he was about to say, but eventually carefully started talking: "You're not. There is no possibility of leaving or entering this school without anyone's knowledge." Hermione's eyes widened, "What? But they need help!" Hermione argued, her anger rising. "What was the point of finding out their location if I'm unable to visit them?"
"They'll be alright. Haven't you been teaching them the necessary protecting spells?" Hermione nodded slowly, her arms crossed over her chest and her eyes narrowing in anger. "Go back to your classes." Was all he said and Hermione scoffed, moving out of her chair in rapid speed and snatching her schoolbag as she left the office.
Having eaten her lunch, she moved on with the next class of the day: Dark Arts. It was even worse than the Muggle Studies classes, where Alecto Carrow bashed all the Muggleborns in the most gruesome way. At Dark Arts, however, it didn't stop with the verbal abuse.
It was only their first day back at school, and they were already expected to train the most foul spells on first and second years. Of course, like many other friends of hers, she refused to do so and instead got one of those spells backfired on herself.
"I knew the Dark Lord was wrong to trust you. Can't even punish the young ones." Amycus spat in her face after having her held back at the end of the class. Hermione's face turned stone cold, making her seem unaffected by his words. "The Dark Lord did not command me to throw jinxes around. All he asked of me was information on Harry Potter." She said lowly and he scowled, releasing her robes that he had clutched into his fist.
"You be careful, little Mudblood. Marked by the Dark Lord or not, you're as filthy as any other Mudblood walking through these corridors. It's an embarrassment to the Wizarding world, and it will be punished." Hermione watched him leave the classroom with narrowed eyes and she followed, heading straight for the dungeons where she could finally escape everything around her.
She wasn't going to lie – she absolutely regretted coming back to Hogwarts. This was not the way she wanted to be educated. But, she had no choice. She was Snape's wife, and she had a mission to fulfill.