It had been a day since that night at the bar and Clara had slept through the whole thing. Part of Dean wondered if she was really sleeping or just avoiding the inevitable conversation that they were going to have. Maybe that is why he has not tried to wake her up yet. He was just as scared at the prospect of the conversation as she was. So he settled for laying next to her and scooting close. Knowing she was not sleeping from the uneven pace of the rising and falling chest when he wrapped an arm around her. "You know that you are going to have to wake up eventually babe." Dean commented to Clara as she scooted closer to him, resting her head between his chest and the bed. When Dean caught a glimpse of how nervous the look on Clara's face was and he felt a wave of guilt hit him in the chest at the thought of being any part in making her feel this way. She should not be nervous like this, not around him. They should be happy, and just be normal right now. It was only a matter of time before everything came crashing down, though, being normal was just something he would have to fight to keep if it was even possible.
"So, as much as I don't want to ask this I kind of have to. What exactly happened back there? I mean Max..." Dean watched Clara as she trailed off and bit her lip, her composure faltering for a moment. It was killing him to watch her struggle like this, try and stay composed when everything was falling down like a house of cards. Dean had fought that struggle so many times that he lost track; he would give anything to be able to take on the struggle for her. "I am thankful for what you did and everything, I really am. It's just... I need to know what happened back there and if I am going insane or not." Clara explained, her eyes meeting his as they sat there for a moment, just watching each other.
He knew that this was either going to end one of two ways: Clara was going to get overwhelmed by the amount of heavy duty crazy being thrown at her and tell him to leave in an attempt to keep a shred of sanity; or she would believe him and not be able to go back to that normal safe life that was her reality before all of this mess. Clara had a right to know what was happening, though, after everything she had gone through tonight alone... it just was not fair not to tell her the truth. "So I don't really know how to say this delicately, but what you saw back there was a demon, and Max was a ghost. I don't know how they both got there at the same time, but that's what they were." Dean explained as he watched her lift her head and give him a puzzled look. "This was kind of what I did as a very shitty paying and thankless career before I met you." He explained, sighing softly, his hand running lightly through Clara's tangled hair as she watched him. Her eyes feeling like they were going to burn holes in his head.
The silence feeling like hours as it dragged on and Dean laid there getting increasingly nervous her gaze turned to the world outside the window, clearly deep in thought. "There is more out there isn't there?" Clara asked as she looked back at him. On instinct he wanted to say no, every part of him wanted to call Castiel down to wipe her memory. So he did not say anything, instead letting the silence answer her question as she looked away from him again. "No wonder you didn't want to talk about your job before you came here." She commented, sighing softly as her head shook. "You know that I still love you right?" Clara asked, catching Dean off guard by her words. They never said that four lettered word before and after all of this, and it comes out right this moment of all times.
Dean just watched Clara as she settled back into bed next to him. There was this warmth spreading through him at the thought of honestly being loved despite everything that was a part of his life. He smiled and wrapped an arm around Clara, pulling her close. "I love you too Clara." Dean said as he leaned down and kissed the beautiful woman in his arms softly, lingering for a long moment as her arms wrapped themselves around his neck. Just enjoying the fact that someone who was completely unaware of anything supernatural existing, found out who he is and what he really did and still loved him. No yelling, or getting kicked out of the house. Just unfiltered love and devotion.
All too soon he felt Clara pull away from the kiss and smiled as her forehead pressed against his. The two of them just lay there looking into each other's eyes for a moment, their eyes locked with each others. It was a while before the silence between the two of them was broken by Clara's soft voice. "You know, now that I know what is out there and everything... well I am really glad that I have someone that can protect me and maybe even show me how to keep myself safe from these things." She explained, giving Dean that smiled that he just could not help but smile back at. "So, be honest. The salt around the doors and windows to 'keep the bugs out', and the necklace you told me not to take off. They are all to stop a monster from coming inside in their own ways?" Clara asked as she pulled back a little bit and gave him a sceptical look, tilting her head to the side in that way that told him she was already thinking of the answer.
"Well the salt does keep the bugs out, but no it was for keeping demons out. They necklace is to stop you from being possessed by a demon. There is also a devil's trap under the area rug in front of the door." Dean explained as he smiled at her sheepishly, trying to make himself sound the least insane as possible. Not that there was really anyway not to sound insane at this point, but Clara seemed to be actually believing what he was telling her so far. Which he did not know whether to be comforted by it or question her sanity. "So you are actually believing all of this?" He asked, watching Clara as she just smiled at him and reached a hand to his face. The warm flesh meeting Dean's cheek as she lightly cupped his face and nodded her head a little to answer the question. Wow, she really believed him... and still wants to be here next to him. It was all just so crazy to think about her really still being here.
The family secret was out and she did not want to either become a hunter or get as far away from him as humanly possible. This was just too good to be true right now. Nothing good ever happened to him without a price. "So what you said about your brother being in hell then. Is he really in hell and the angels, God and all that Biblical stuff are real?" Clara asked as she moved a hand to Dean's chest and slowly slipped it up his stomach. "You know what. I don't want to know any more right now. This is a lot to get through my head right now, I don't need more." She said, sighing as her warm fingers traced the muscles on his chest.
More than anything he was thankful that Clara dropped that thought as soon as it came to her. The last thing that either of them needed was to open up the deep hurt of losing his brother. "Honestly, I'm just glad that you still want to be around me and haven't kicked me out yet." Dean commented, trying to get the topic as far away from her question as possible to stop it from coming back. Shaking his head Dean looked into Clara's eyes and just let himself get lost in them, watching the love and passion swimming inside their depths. "You know, I think I have a way to distract you from the troubling thoughts in your head. It will make you feel really relaxed." He said, smirking a little bit and slipping a hand under her shirt, fingers lightly trailing up her spine. Grinning at Clara when he felt a shiver run through her body and she pressed closer to him. "You like that? Just wait till I'm done with you." Dean explained as he rolled on top of Clara, his hands on either side of her head, bodies flush against each other
Dean watched her as she bit her lip and looked up at him her breathing faster than it should have been, even for in the heat of the moment. Before he could say anything Clara spoke for him. "I'm sorry, I just... I don't know." She said softly, her voice coming out shaky and weak. Dean rolled off of Clara and to the side, pulling her close, feeling those slender arms quickly wrap around him. The last thing that he wanted to do was cause Clara more stress, or upset her in anyway. So, as much as Dean really wanted to make her smile with the best way he knew how... that just was not what she needed from him right now.
So he just continued to hold Clara close to him as she shook a little. The telltale sign that Clara was crying again, especially paired with the way she clutched him close again. "It's okay, you don't have to explain yourself. We can just lay here and relax for as long as you want." Dean said as he ran a hand through Clara's hair and lightly kissed the top of her head as she tucked it under his head. This guilt was sitting on his chest like a led weight. Sure he had nothing to do with the ghost of her boyfriend coming back, but that demon was on him. That would have never happened if Dean had not had come into her life and put everything she knows in danger just by being there. What was he thinking staying there? The amount of danger that she was in with him in there was insane. The problem was that the demon that came after Clara was not going to be the last thing that would come. Now that the word is out that there is another person that he loves in his life these creatures are going to want payback, and unlike the rest of the people in his life, Clara could not defend herself against these things that would come after her. The damage was already done and there was no going back now.
"Dean." Clara said softly, her voice cracking a little as she lifted her head and looked Dean in the eyes. "I was so scared back there and I was sure that I was going to die. All I could think about was you and those beautiful eyes; what it would be like the have little children running around the house one day, or just not feeling broken... All I wanted was to spend another day with you Dean, that was all I could think of." She explained as her eyes looked deep into his. Just like that he knew it was too late to leave Clara. The woman next to him depended on him as much as he depended on her. There was no way that he was going to be able to just slip out in the night and forget her like the other girls. This was so much more than anything he had ever had. Things with Cassie were not even this intense.
All he did we cup her face in his hands and just look into those beautiful blue eyes. "Well, you have me for more than one day now." Dean said softly as he smiled at Clara, feeling the happiest that he had in a very long time. Just laying here and knowing that he had someone that genuinely loved him unconditionally. It was more than he could have ever asked for, and more than he would ever deserve. There was no way that Dean was giving this up now. Right, then Dean decided that no matter what he would fight till the end to keep this woman in his life, holding her close like it was the last time they would ever see each other again. "I promise I'm not going anywhere." He assured Clara, feeling her breathing even out and slow down. Maybe he would not have the white picket fence necessarily, but if just laying in a soft comfortable bed with his beautiful girl next to him was what every day would be like, Well that was all he needed, just the light in his darkness.