Chapter four. Sorry again for the wait, I'm trying to get my life sorted out. As I said before, my best friend died, I'm trying hard to get over it and be happy. Shit happens.

I'm feeling a little better, so I'm trying to write more. I've been looking forwards to doing this chapter anyway, so hopefully it will be easier to write.

Thank you for your support and patience.

Chapter Four - Rehearsing Old Routines

I wake up pretty early, yet my breakfast has already been served. It seems like a small quantity of food for womeone who has been starving for the past month or so, but once I begin to eat, I realise why they gave me so little.

I haven't even got through half of the breakfast cereal yet and I'm full. My mind wants more food for the sweet taste and satisfaction of knowing that I have had a full meal, but my body can't take any more. I guess my stomach has shrunk. That would make sense. Also, the stinging smell that fills my nose every time I breathe in doesn't help. I can't place the smell, but it certainly isn't very appealing. It's so unnatural, it seems to burn my nose.

I leave the rest of my food, no matter how appealing to the eye it is. My mouth is still watering.

It's dark outside, the sun hasn't risen yet, and the clock beside me tells me that it's half past five. It should be light outside soon, or at least, it would be back in District Four.

I've still got tubes stuck in my arms and up my nose. My doctor promised me that they would be taken out before the interview, today.

Nobody is awake yet.

I guess I have some time to think then.

Questions flood through my mind, and I can barely seperate one from another. I pick some out, important ones right now.

How will the Capitol react?

This one is kind of hard to predict. The people of the Capitol usually freak out over everything, so they'll be happy I'm not dead, but probably feint when I go up on stage. They could be angry at my team for keeping me behind closed doors for so long.

I hope it won't be too overwhelming, appearing on stage again. I need to decide what kind of angle I am going to go for.

It's probably a good idea to portray myself as someone who people in the Capitol look up to and adimre. Someone so close, yet completely untouchable. I don't want to get caught up in all of their gossip and glamour.

I'll do what they want, for now.

I have no idea how long I have been sitting here for, but my life seems to have been going by so fast. It's getting light outside, and I can hear people outside of my room moving around.

It's time to start the show again.

Sure enough, my doctor walks into my room, and as he promised, he takes out all of the tubes, which is a relief, and tells me to wait for my stylists.

I turn on the TV to see if the interviews have been confimed yet. They have.

Everyone is crying, even the reporter. Damn, Treasure might not be so stupid after all. The crowds are hysterical.

In my opinion, the sooner I get up on that stage, the better, before any riots start.

The pain is still pretty bad, they've taken the morphling away, so it's hitting me full on. When I get changed for the interview, I guess I'll get to see the damage.

My stylists are pretty fast, they're here to pick me up already. They help me outof my bed, and my legs are just as unstable as I remember. How I wish I could just lie in bed for another day.

I'll get used to the pain I guess, I'm glad I'll be sitting down for the interview.

It seems like an awful long way to the elevator, but my team help me get there, chatting excitedly to me. I'm thankful for the rails in the elevator.

Through the one way glass, I can see the crowd gathered outside of the building. There's even more people than there was yesterday.

We flash past them, and down to the remake level. The doors open, and I am overwhelmed by a feeling of guilt. It's haunting, seeing all of the diffrent sections, each one devoted to a tribute. The names are still on the doors.

I try to ignore them, but I can't. The room just feels so empty.

We are silent as we walk to the room lableled District Four. Our footsteps echo eerily. I'm guessing that not many people are in on Treasure's plans, and have been told to stay away.

Raven, Ryan and Hunter are already down here. I can hear them talking to their stylists, and the buzzing of TV's in the background.

They lead me into my room, which brings back so many memories. I remember sitting here for the first time, when we arrived in the Capitol, thinking I would never come back. If I could see myself now, what would I say?

They hand me my tablet, and start to work on my hair and makeup. I don't turn it on yet, I just look at myself in the mirror.

It's the first time I've seen myself in a mirror for weeks, maybe even over a month. I look very different from how I remember myself.

My hair is a mess, which makes me happy, a familiar feature. Its the same sandy blonde colour.

My skin is washed out, which makes me look completley diffrent. Im used to my natural tan. I guess I've been indoors for a while though. They'll be able to fix that with makeup, I'm sure. My eyes are still their usual bright blue colour, but they look tired. I have scars too, the most obvious one on my jaw.

My eyebrows, which were thick anyway, have grown out even more. I'm not looking forwards to getting them waxed. I presume that's what they'll do.

It's strange, seeing my own reflection after all these weeks.

I try to distract myself as they attack me with brushes, hot wax, and tweezers. It's nothing compared to the pain I have felt in the arena, but it's annoying.

I just watch them for a while, before trying to start a conversation.

"So, what will I be wearing tonight?" I ask, watching as Stella washes my hair.

"A dress that Marvel designed. It had to fit requirements, as it's the crowning ceremony. It's still beautiful though. You'll like it." says Feicity.

I'm tempted to tell her that I'm looking for a full answer, but I restrain myself from doing so. All I wanted to do was start a conversation.

After they're done with the first stage of my makeover, they begin on my makeup. I just have to sit there, with my eyes closed.

It's the perfect time to fall asleep.

They let me, for about three minutes before waking me up again.

I hate having my eyes closed, it reminds me of when I was trapped, inside my own mind. That's another fear to add to the list.

I hate the feeling of the brushes over my skin, but I have to put up with it. It's only another couple of hours.

You survived the Hunger Games, you can survive this. That's what I tell myself.

After a while, they announce that they're done with the makeup, and they need me to stand up for the dress.

I try to resist, but they pull me up anyway. As I'm getting changed, I see myself in the mirror again. I'm stick thin, bones sticking out in every place possible. How I wish I could be back to my normal weight again.

I also notice the source of my pain. My mouth drops open when I see the scar on my side. It's big, a huge ridge that obviously has some stitches in it. It's a dpcolour slightly darker than my skin, with bruises all around it.

"This dress better cover my scar up." I say to them as they pull it out of the closet.

They tell me to close my eyes, and guide me into it. The smooth, satin like fabric feels lovely against my now soft skin.

They get me to hold onto something while they lace up the back. I have to grit my teeth. It's tight, like a corset. As if I would need one. I hate being this skinny, I feel fragile.

The Capitol are literally trying to make me into a living doll.

They tell me that they're done with the dress, and that they need me to stand still while they get shoes and accessories. I'm yet again, glad I have something to hold onto.

They come back, and I can feel them tugging violently at my hair, before sliding something cold into it. Then, they get me to step into the shoes.

"This would be much easier if I had my eyes open y'know." I mumble as they fasten them. Thank god they're not that high, or I wouldn't be able to walk at all.

They then lead me over to the full length mirror, and tell me to open my eyes.

I'm hesitant, but I do as they tell me.

The girl standing before me doesn't look like me. She looks like a victor.

I'm in a full length ivory gown, with a flowy skirt that pools on the floor around me. They tell me it's made from chiffon. It makes me look elegant and poised. The bodice is tight, very tight. It's made of the same material, and has some beautiful beading on it. It matches the crown on my head.

The crown is beautiful, and is covered in ivory beading and pearls. It sticks out from my hair, which is wavy, but naturally so. My skin is back to it's normal colour, and my makeup isn't over the top. It's soft, just like my outfit. There are some crystals on my face, around my eyes, designed to match the pearls and beading.

"It's beautiful. Thank you. But I thought President Watson had the crowns?" I ask, confused.

"Oh, he does. We'll just take this crown off of you when you're making your way up to the balcony." smiles Mavel, pleased that I like his work.

I look to TV, which has been on silent the whole time. It's dark outside already.

I guess I really am losing track of time.

"Should we go? We don't want to be late." I say, gesturing to the TV. It's already showing Cesar talking to the crowd.

"You're meant to be late. Remember?" laughs Felicity, straightening out my skirt for me, making sure it falls perfectly to the ground.

"The interviews take place outside the President's mansion, don't they? How are we going to get there without being seen?" I ask.

"Easy. We've got access to trains that run underground, remember? " says Stella.

"Nope. You never told me that." I reply.

"We did. You must forget things easily." says Felicity, backing Stella up.

We take the elevator to the floor below us. I'm glad to be out of that empty floor.

Sure enough, there's a little train station, with trains ready to go.

We get on and sit down in our seats, ready to go.

The nerves begin to kick in as I rehearse my lines in my head. I have to say the right things, do the right things, and generally be a perfect person.

That's impossible though.

There's no such thing as a perfect human being.

So, that was chapter four! I hope you enjoyed it, as you can see, I have a bit of a passion for fashion design. I'll try and get the next chapter up as soon as I can. The story hasn't even really started yet, I'm just kind of filling in all of the gaps before it all kicks off again, which should be soon.

Please take a moment to review guys, I'd love to know how I'm doing.

Thank you for reading.

BethanyDee x x