Chapter 9 Find Yourself
Alice's body was still, her eyes were closed and her breathing was slow and soft. She was on top of the covers, boots on and everything just like she had found Will when she first arrived home.
After laughing for what seemed like hours, she had drifted into a euphoric sleep, one that her body craved and needed, one that she had never experienced before. To her, it was like she was a newborn child resting in its mother's arms, not a single care in the world, nothing to worry about, utter and complete bliss.
Alice finally felt at peace for the first time since she moved to Gotham. To the normal person this would have been rather strange, feeling calm and collected after moving to a big city, getting kidnapped and killing someone, but for a girl like Alice she had anticipated this. After all she had been raised under the care of a highly functional sociopath (her father) and witnessed an abundance of obscene atrocities at young age, things like armed robbery, gang rape, and murder. Things that were deemed "criminal" and "evil" but to her these things were normal, it was her life. And not to mention the fact that she had taken a particular interest in death and killing, a very unhealthy obsession to be exact. So naturally she had always wondered what it would be like to take a life, and she had read many books and various articles about what it was like to do so, but witnessing her own family die before her eyes seemed to kill her curiosity almost instantly. As a result of this she buried her dark and morbid thoughts for years, creating a new personality for herself, one that was forgiving and compassionate, the complete opposite of how she was wired. She was successful for the most part and when she met Will, to her, it was like she finally achieved normalcy. But little did she know that she was a sitting grandee, she was ready to go off at any moment, ready to completely explode and destroy everything around her, someone just had to come along and pull the pin. And she had to thank the Joker for that.
Alice's eyelids slowly opened, she sat up lethargically while letting out a small yawn and glanced at the clock beside her, it read 1:00am. She pushed herself off the bed and made her way to the bathroom not taking a second glance at the pile of lifeless human on the floor. As she entered the bathroom she didn't bother to shut the door, she just turned the shower on and peeled off her blood stained clothes. She shoved them into the corner and then threw her boots carelessly into the bedroom as she stepped into the steam. She stood still in the scolding water for just a moment and then continued to go about her usual routine paying close attention to clean off the dried blood on her hands and making sure not to aggravate her tender ribs. After she rinsed the soap from her body, she let herself just stand still under the water, letting the droplets rain on her back, giving herself a moment to think.
Of course Alice knew what she did was wrong, she could very well differentiate between wrong and right for that matter, and what she did was most definitely not right. Yeah people might have justified it as self defense, but she killed Will simply because she had a chance. And with the way that she was feeling after the fact, this was no random act of "self defense". No, in killing him she had satisfied the bloodlust that had been building up in her subconscious for years. Yeah she could have also easily gotten out alive, she didn't doubt that, but apparently her subconscious decided that if she had the opportunity to kill then she would, and kill she did.
The irony of it all was that the Joker was right when he fazed Alice with killing a man; he knew she was more than capable of doing it; she just needed a little push. He also knew that when she saw that pointless man die it would trigger her memories and make his job of breaking her a little easier. And of course he knew all of this way before he kidnapped her; he knew it the moment she came back to Gotham.
After all this was a personal affair, therefore the Joker needed to know everything about her so he could calculate exactly how she would react to the events that were thrown at her. So as far as he suspected everything was going according to plan, like it always did, but in this case he would be dead wrong. See he simply thought that Alice would just turn into a depressed suicidal mess; maybe have a few violent outbreaks, some delusions here and there, the cliché of a psychotic break, overall mentally scarred by the whole event, which is what he was going for. It was a little soft for his taste, but this was a personal matter, he had no one to impress, only himself, and he really didn't care all that much for himself. This was just another attempt to ease the painful boredom that had piled up on him over the past couple of months at Arkham. And since the Bats was nowhere to be found yet, this was the only fun he had in a while.
He really didn't care much to stick around and see his plan pan out, that's why he let her go, he was done with her, he had successfully beaten her down and left her to her own demise, guessing that she would have her little "psychotic break", maybe kill herself, or move on. Whatever scenario he thought was going to happen it didn't really entertain him due to the fact that he wasn't really one for self pity and angst. So he moved on mentally noting that dealing with "personal affairs" was just as boring as being in Arkham. However, he would have never guessed that Alice would have reacted the way she did.
As Alice got out of the shower and dried herself off with a towel hanging nearby she looked at her reflection in the mirror, she was surprised to see that Will's punches didn't leave her with two shiners, only small bruises forming on her cheekbones. She tilted her head to inspect further and found nothing, satisfied with the lack of battle wounds, she rummaged through draws trying to find an old box of hair dye she had stashed away. She pulled it out of the last drawer and found that the dye was a jet black with deep under tones of violet, it would have to work, 'at least its not blond' she thought and then dismember the box efficiently. She mixed the dye and then spread it throughout her golden brown roots and down the rest of her strands sloppily, she wasn't going for perfection, she was going for unrecognizable. She then put her hair in a clip and exited the bathroom to let the dye process.
When she left the bathroom Alice ventured to the closest and fished around for a large duffle bag, she found one that wasn't too big and nor to small. She threw multiple pairs of dark wash skinny jeans, a few various dark colored tee shirts, and then all the bars, underwear and socks she owned, which wasn't many. She left out an outfit for herself and put it on hastily leaving the wet towel on the floor. She took another glance around the closest to make sure she hadn't forgotten anything and Will's black leather jacket caught her eye. Without a second thought she snatched it off the hanger and threw it on, it was a little large but it fit her pretty well and framed her small figure nicely.
She threw the bag onto the bed and made her way over to the nightstand where she gathered up the rest of William's knives, she put them in her bag and then reached for the gun. She hadn't used a gun in years but considering that she was now a "criminal" it didn't hurt to take it. She checked the magazine making sure it had enough bullets, turned the safety on and shoved it in the back of her pants. Not satisfied with her weapons, Alice searched under the bed for extra guns and ammo. To her surprise she found a large revolver, a rifle, and what looked like to be an automatic hand gun. She also was pleased to find a large metal box which incased all the bullets she needed. She grabbed the two hand guns along with the appropriate ammo and placed them on the bed. Happy with her findings she grabbed an empty backpack that was beside the bed and put the weaponry in there.
The time it took for Alice to pack her bags was just enough to let the dye in her hair set in, knowing this; she went back into the bathroom, bent down and shoved her head into the sink. She watched as dark water went down the drain leaving her hair a deadly black. She dried it roughly with towel and looked in the mirror very content with the results, it was a harsh contrast against her pale skin but it was just enough to make her look like a new person. Deciding that she really didn't have much time to do anything further she snatched up her makeup bag, tooth brush, and the combat boots while exiting the bathroom.
She put the boots on giving her new look the finishing touch, she had chosen black skinny jeans, a deep maroon v-neck tee shirt that ended right above her hip bones, and Will's worn in leather jacket. She smiled at herself in the mirror; she had to admit she looked pretty bad ass. She placed the remaining items into her duffle bag and zipped it up tossing it in the direction of the door; she was a little more careful with the artillery filled backpack and set it nicely next to the duffel bag. She did a quick mental check to see if she needed anything else and made her way to the bedroom door, but as she bent down to pick up her bags she halted.
She turned her attention to the dead body that was three feet away that she so effortlessly avoided while getting ready. The fresh wound on his abdomen was covered in dark sticky blood and the veil liquid pooled around his torso as well. Alice walked over to the corpse and hovered over it with a sort of cockiness, she had done that to him, she was the one to take the breath out of his lungs, she killed him. A chill ran up her spine at the thought of this and the corners of her mouth twitched upward, she found a strange sense of power in knowing that she had so easily taken a life.
Deciding that it was time to go, she turned away from the body and reached for the murder weapon. She wiped the blood off the blade by dragging it along the top half of Will's shirt, she took one last look at his still face and a thought popped into her head.
"They need to know that this was me" she stated aloud with a chilling coldness. Alice then got a firm grip on the knife and placed it on William's forehead, she didn't really take much thought into her actions and she just let herself do. Before she knew it she drew the knife away and smiled at her handy work, she had neatly carved a diamond into the center of his forehead. Nothing to gory, just enough so that it was outlined in blood, just enough to let who ever found his body know that it was on purpose, to let them know that this was her signature.
Fulfilled with herself Alice snapped the knife shut, put it in her jacket pocket, picked up her bags and left the room without taking a second look back. She jogged down the stairs and into the living room where she put down her bags and began her search for a large black bible. She pushed some boxes aside and found one reading ALICE'S STUFF in thick black sharpie. She ripped the tape off and threw it onto the floor leaving the box open; she shoved picture frames and random documents out of her way and got to the bottom of the box where her bible was waiting.
Now Alice wasn't really that religious, it wasn't God's divine word that she was looking for. She pulled out the large thick book and opened the front cover, as her memory served the bulk of the middle of the pages were cut out in a rectangular fashion leaving behind an incognito box. In it was a thick wade of cash, a folded piece of paper and a cheap flip phone. She pocketed the cash and paper then turned on the phone. Within seconds it came to life, she instinctively dialed a number by heart and held up the phone to her ear. It rang four times before she started to worry that she dialed the wrong number, just as she pulled the phone away from her face to hang it up the line crackled,
"Hello?" The voice was dark and raspy, very tired sounding, similar to a smokers, but Alice recognized it immediately.
"Saul! It's me Alice Polanco!" she said exuberantly.
"Alice Rose Polanco? You're shittin me. I haven't hear from you since, the um, the accident. But with all due respect kid why the hell are you calling me at two in the morning?"
"Well Saul after my parents died you said that if I ever needed anything to never hesitate to call, I mean after all you were like a second father to me…"
"Yeah I guess that's true", he said with a little sympathy, "so whattya need kid?"
"I'm in a little bit of trouble. I need you to come to my apartment right away, no questions asked, bring some guys and a shit ton of gasoline. The address is 639 West 81st street and Columbus ave."
"Uh okay kid, but why the gasoline?" Saul said sound genuinely confused.
"Didn't I say no questions asked, now hurry. And thanks Saul."
"Alight kid no problemo, see you in a jiff." With that Alice snapped the phone shut and plopped down on the couch.
It only took Saul about twenty-five minutes to get to Alice's apartment from the Bowery, considering that he was speeding and that it was two in the morning so there was little to none traffic. There was a quiet knock on the door and Alice quickly got up from her relaxed position from the couch and answered. She swung open the door theatrically,
"Welcome to my humble abode!" she gestured Saul and the three other random men that she didn't know in to the house. They were all carrying two large canisters of gasoline each and immediately set them down as soon as they crossed the thresh hold.
Saul was very old looking compared to the three other men who looked in their thirties, but he was taller and bigger than them. He was bald and had grey pepper scruff that made the statement of 'of yeah I'm old get over it'. Alice was happy to see that he hadn't changed at all.
"Go ahead take a seat, make yourselves at home, can I get you guys anything, coffee maybe?"
"Uh yeah ill take a coffee please." One of the henchmen said politely while taking his place on the couch.
"Okay four cups of coffee coming up, wanna help me get the pot started Saul?" she asked not really giving him an option, more like a 'I need to talk to you' plea. Without a word he followed her into the kitchen and took a seat at the bar while Alice got the coffee brewing.
"Long time no see kid, you look wide eyed and bushy tailed, whats gotten into you?"
"Do you want the long story or the short story?" Alice asked in a matter of fact tone.
"Spare me the details please."
"Alright" Alice began "long story short I moved back to Gotham, managed to get kidnapped by the Joker, found out that my uncle killed my family, and oh I just murdered my boyfriend who happens to be the police chief at GPD." She paused to read the reaction on Saul's face, but there was none, he was stoic.
"Rough week kid, so why do you need us?" Saul said cutting to the chase, which he always did.
"Well for a couple of reasons." Alice said while searching the cabinets for spare mugs, "for starters you, right now are the only person I can trust, I have no one else to turn to. That being said, I want to take my father's place, which is rightfully mine to take anyway." She paused again giving Saul a moment to respond.
"I can arrange that, continue."
Alice was slightly taken back by his answer but it instilled her with more confidence. "Number two I have a dead body upstairs and a house full of evidence, we need to keep the body but burn this place down, hence why I asked you to bring the gas. And thirdly, if I'm going to burn this place down ill need somewhere to go, are you guys still hiding out in that loft in Bowery?"
"Well we've down sized quite a bit, we're still in Bowery, but I think we have an extra room. Listen Alice, I'm glad you called, I know this is not the life you wanted but I'm proud and I know you're father would be too. You're a strong woman; don't let anyone tell you otherwise okay? Now let's go check on this dead boyfriend of yours."
"Thanks Saul that means a lot, follow me." Alice said with a soft smile on her face. It was odd to hear the rough man compliment her like that but it gave her a sense of comfort knowing that someone was proud of what she did.
She led him up the stairs and into the bedroom, she walked in and Saul followed behind her, "Well there he is", she said motioning to the dead body, "the prick had it coming, he just caught me on a bad day."
Saul inspected the body carefully, crouching down next to it getting a good look at the bloody wound, he then noticed the diamond carved into Will's forehead.
"You are just like your father" Saul said while standing up and smiling, "he always had to leave his mark, and I'm assuming that's what this is right?" he asked referring to the engraved forehead.
"Yeah I guess you can say that." Alice said with a bashful smile.
"Well let's not waste any more time, Ill tell the boys to come help with the body, you start drenching the place in gasoline, got it?"
"Sounds like a plan!" Alice said excitedly well leaving the bedroom.
After a good ten minutes William's body was safely in the back of van along with Alice's things and the brownstone apartment was doused in flammable liquid. Alice and Saul stood on the steps of the apartment while the other guys sat in the van, he reached into his pocket and took out a large metal lighter, he flicked it on and handed it to Alice, "You can do the honors kid."
She smiled and held onto the lighter tight; she took one last look at her home and without a second thought threw the flame into the house. She and Saul quickly retreated to the van, she got in the back seat and he climbed in after her. Within seconds the building was engulfed by the flames. They pulled away from the house quickly and were now speeding down the streets of Gotham, sirens blaring in the distance.
Alice's heart was beating fast, her life had completely changed in just one night, she wasn't the person she had made herself be over the years, now she was finally herself.
I hope everyone enjoyed this update! It took longer than expected but here it is.
I just want to say that this is the real turning point for Alice, from here on out you'll be seeing a new side of her. I also wanted to say you'll also be seeing a lot of the Joker and maybe a few appearances from Batsy! Please leave a review I would love to know what you thought xoxo