END GAME

Chapter 9: Agony and Pleasure

By the time Eren woke up at eleven, the bullet wound was more or less gone, leaving only pink scar tissue behind, which seemed to grow smaller with every passing minute. Levi dropped Eren off at his house at noon, few words having passed between them in the past hour. Eren slowly walked up the stairs, not wanting to take the elevator even though his side was still burning. It was a tolerable burn, one he welcomed. It was a way to remind himself that he wasn't so drained, both emotionally and mentally, that he couldn't feel.

He took the steps slowly, one foot at a time instead of his usual way of taking two or three at a time, both going up and coming down. He felt… hollow inside. It was strange how he craved human comfort but wanted to reject it at the same time, how he wanted to just sit and talk with the one person he though he never would have been able to get along with; Levi. It was a startling realization, one that sent him into a vigorous rubbing of the face as he tried to pretend like his cheeks hadn't started smoldering.

Eren sighed and pulled his keys from the gray sweatpants he was currently wearing, the sweatpants which weren't actually his. Neither was the shirt for that matter, but thankfully the jacket and shoes were his. Levi had loaned him some clothes before they had left and apparently he had also retrieved Eren's coat from the station, which still had his phone and keys in the pockets. The pants were just a hair too short, the white shirt slightly too short and slightly too small. Eren wasn't sure what had happened to his other clothes, just that they were gone.

He turned the lock and opened the door, blinking in surprise when he found two someone's waiting on him in his apartment. Mikasa and Armin were seated on his chairs, looking expectantly at him. Armin was holding a coffee cup in one hand. Another was in front of Mikasa and there was a circular object wrapped in paper lying next to a third, seemingly untouched cup of coffee on the coffee table just in front of the couch. Eren closed the door with a soft click and groaned inwardly. Mikasa was going to murder him. "Hi guys," he said tentatively, "I'm home."

Mikasa's head slowly rose, moving slowly. Her gray eyes burned with anger as she glared at him, silently demanding an explanation. Eren slowly crept over to the couch and sat down, waiting for one of them to speak as he sat down. "Eren…" Mikasa said and her voice deceptively soft and calm for the turmoil that Eren could see in her, evident through her eyes. "Can you explain to me why the hell I got a call this morning from Levi? Can you explain why he told me that you had been shot and that someone called Hanji had operated on you and gotten the bullet out?" Eren was surprised how well Mikasa was doing; normally by now she would have sat him down in a corner, making him sit in silence for several long, arduous hours as she berated him nonstop.

"Well…" Eren said, wary of anything that might set Mikasa off on a mothering-overload. "Levi and I were at the police station yesterday going over some facts about the case. You know that fire by Adam's River yesterday? Well, Levi, Irvin, and I were the only ones at the station so we had to respond to the call, especially since Marion had been sighted at the scene. So Levi got me a gun and a vest and Irvin drove us there. Levi and I went one way and Irvin went the other. We saw Marion first and followed him. He stopped in the middle of an alleyway. I think he was on some kind of drug because he seemed to be a little off. Then… well, he shot me before either of us could react, although I'm pretty sure Levi got a couple of shots off. He wanted to take me to the hospital but when I told him no, he punched me. He must have knocked out a tooth because he was asking about that last night… sorry, earlier this morning, around two I think. We talked for a bit before I went back to sleep till an hour or so ago…"

Okay, maybe he could have been a little more careful with his words considering the murderous look on Mikasa's face, but it was too late to take those words back. Armin's mouth was open in shock, which was understandable considering that was a first, even for Eren. Mikasa simply sat in the chair, her eyes narrowed and fixed on Eren, the gray depths of her eyes burning with an unimaginable wrath; not that Eren would want to imagine it either way.

"Eren…" Mikasa said and her voice was so calm, so slow, that Eren was almost positive she was going to bridge the gap between them so she could drive a fist into one various body part or another. He raised his hands defensively, one going up to cover his face, the other instinctively moving to his crotch. Mikasa might love him, but she looked furious enough to hit him there.

"Eren, you're such an idiot! God, you are such an idiot, I can't even believe you! This Hanji woman got it out right? Has it healed over? Did that short man hurt you anymore? Did he touch you inappropriately?" With every sentence Mikasa leaned in closer and closer until their maces were mere inches apart. She had stood at some point when she was talking, following Eren as he inched his way away from her wrath till there was no more room to move without going over the arm of the couch.

He could try to escape out the window, but that was a long drop, especially since there wasn't one of those rickety metal fire escape stairs outside. That would have simply been too convenient. Eren's face began to burn brightly, his cheeks flaming red, "N-no, I'm fine! Nobody touched me!" Mikasa stared at him, silent for a long time before she crumpled down onto the couch beside him, her head falling into her hands. Eren slowly straightened, watching her shoulders shake. She was silent, even now, when she most likely wanted to scream and cry at the top of her lungs.

"Eren…" Mikasa whispered and her voice hoarse and trembling, "You could have died… You could have left me again, like you almost did before…" Eren's chest contracted as agonizing guilt slammed into him. He felt like all the air had been knocked out of him, leaving him shocked and breathless. Oh God... I really fucked up, didn't I? Eren put his hand on Mikasa's shoulder, which shook gently beneath his hand. Armin moved to Mikasa's other side and they both pulled her into a hug. Idiot! Eren berated himself. I'm such a damn idiot! I'm sorry Mikasa, I'm so sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry…

Somewhere during those thoughts his thoughts had stopped being private and the words rolled off his tongue. He could hear himself distantly, sounding like a broken record player repeating the same message again and again in hopes of making things somewhat right. They stayed like that for a long time, the three of them siting silently together, comforting each other and holding each other tight, as if reassuring one another that yes, they were there and that yes, they were all alive and healthy.

Mikasa and Armin had come to the decision earlier that they were going to stay at Eren's apartment for a while and that was exactly what they did. They camped out in the living room, talking quietly, movies playing in the background and mugs of hot chocolate clenched in their hands as night slowly began to descend upon Eden, the skies blazing with dying sunlight. Mikasa's hand kept brushing his, only intensifying Eren's already crushing guilt.

He knew why she did it, he knew what it meant. He knew that she was checking that he was warm, breathing, alive, because if he wasn't then she would be alone again. Because he knew that she was afraid of losing what little family she had left, the family that seemed to keep disappearing, no matter what she did. The simple beating of his heart, the warmth radiating off his skin brought her comfort, no matter how long it lasted because it was a reminder to herself that she hadn't been left.

The relief that had come with talking to Levi early that morning had only brought a temporary feeling of respite to Eren and now everything that the talk had washed away was back, full-force. It was terrifying really, knowing that even for a few hours, his mind had been blissfully absent of the self-torment, the hatred, the guilt, and then it could so easily be reverted back, like nothing had happened at all to temporarily cause a change. It was terrifying to realize that he had hurt Mikasa and Armin more than he thought he could have, so much he was afraid that things would change, that they would leave him to avoid being hurt.

Rationally, he knew that such a thing would never happen, but that little piece of his mind, diminutive but strong, fought against all rational thoughts, planting seeds of doubt within his mind, slowly spreading corruption. It was that little voice in the corner of his mind poisoning his thoughts, his mind, and darkening every aspect of life, covering it all with a dark, gauzy veil. But instead of voicing his thoughts, his concerns, Eren put up a fake front and sipped his hot chocolate.

He laughed at all the right times, smiled at the right times, and spoke at the right times. I've got to stay strong for them… just for a little while longer, just until they leave again. The bliss of a blade and a bottle of alcohol were biding the time silently, waiting for him to come crawling to them for comfort, so temporary yet so addicting as they dragged him into a blissful oblivion. Despite how transparent he felt, neither of them seemed to notice the building turmoil inside.

It was nearly eight o'clock when his phone began to buzz on the table, demanding his attention. He picked the phone up; Call from: Levi. Eren hesitated and looked back and forth, who were both watching the T.V. screen, on which The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers was playing. He stood slowly and Mikasa glanced at him, her brows furrowed and her eyes questioning. "I'll be back in a minute," Eren murmured as he hiked a leg over the back of the couch, managing to ease successfully get onto the other side without his foot catching and sending him into a graceless nosedive. He left the apartment and leaned against the wall next to the door before he accepted the call and raised the phone to his ear, "Hey."

"Took you long enough you idiot," Levi's voice was an irritated growl but it brought a smile to Eren's face nevertheless. "There's news, and by news I don't mean good news. I mean the most irritating and frustrating news I've had in a while. Those bags Marion had with him? They had the kids' bodies inside of them. The bodies were identified through dental records. Not only that, but Marion's body was taken to a hospital last night. This afternoon, they went to autopsy it only to find the body missing. I can't believe those fucking idiots. Useless, that's what they are." Levi sighed and Eren wouldn't have been surprised if the other man was clenching his fists, looking for an outlet for his anger.

"How the hell is that possible? Is there anything on the tapes?" Levi's reply was lost when the phone was jerked from his hand. Eren looked over to see Mikasa glaring at the phone, which was clenched between her fingers. She looked like she might snap the poor handheld device in half as she raised it to her ear.

"Who is this?" She waited a moment as Levi replied. It must not have been the reply she was looking for because her face twisted into a furious snarl. "Sorry, Eren's unavailable right now, especially for midgets like you. He'll call you back when he has a chance." His hand, still by his ear, dropped to his side, a look of confused shock on his face, "Mikasa!"

The black haired girl's head twisted towards him slowly, her face grim as she slid his cell into her pocket. Eren froze at her look of pure rage. "You're not allowed to talk to the short man tonight," she said slowly, enunciating each word carefully and slowly, as if that would help get the message through his 'thick skull,' as it had been referred to as numerous times. "You're on house arrest. So help me God, don't make me get a tracking bracelet because you know I'll do it."

In the end Mikasa managed to refrain from slapping a tracking bracelet around Eren's wrist, although whether it was a result of his begging or Armin's reassurances that Eren would either stay put or in Armin's line of sight, Eren was still unsure of. Mikasa had a case the next morning, one concerning the murder of a father, the suspect being the man's own son. The case would be keeping her away but it wouldn't prevent her from calling when she could. She had called Eren's land line three times that morning at seven o'clock, the sound driving Eren from his cozy bed so he could assure her that yes, he was going to spend the day with Armin and that no, he wasn't going to answer Levi's attempts at conversation.

Eren shifted on the chair in Armin's apartment, watching with heavy-lidded eyes as the blonde twirled one screw after another into place. Music played faintly in the background, some radio station that played rock, pop, and alternative. Armin had already voiced his disappointment in the distinct lack of instrumental music, but that had been the last comment made in the last hour as they lapsed into companionable silence. Eren let a long, bored sigh out as he turned his head, cheek pressed into the counter, his face pointing at Armin.

He watched as the blonde raised another screw and lined it up, pressing the screw driver against it and turning it. Armin had gotten quick at it, whereas Eren could still remember the time four or five months ago when the other man barely knew the difference between an Allen wrench and a screwdriver, which was pretty sad considering how intelligent Armin was. Armin glanced up at Eren as he finished twirling the screw into place, already reaching for another. "Are you alright?"

Eren nodded and leaned back, stretching his arms out above his head. He wanted to talk; he wanted to hear the sound of someone's voice. But he wanted someone else's voice in his ears, berating him for every mistake, insulting him with every other sentence, and constantly irritated at one thing or another. Eren sighed again and dropped his hands onto his knees. He scratched absently at his knuckle.

If only Mikasa hadn't taken my phone… then I could talk to Levi, find out what he was going to say. But that wasn't the only reason. Was there another reason he longed to hear the other man talk? Was he simply craving the company of someone unpredictable, someone that he didn't know everything about? He didn't know anymore. Armin looked up at him again and a soft laugh bubbled past his lips. "Eren, if you're that bored you could have just asked if we could go somewhere. I don't mind stopping for a while."

Eren smiled sheepishly, "Well, I know you're trying to finish that prototype up… I didn't want to distract you."

Armin waved his hand before dropping it down to the table so he could sweep the screws back into their organized container. "Don't worry about it. Now, let's go get some coffee."

Only a few people were in the coffee shop; a woman sitting in the corner, typing away at her laptop; a man reading a book; a couple holding hands as they talked quietly; a group of three college-age kids chattering animatedly. Eren swallowed the scalding coffee, the caffeine smashing into his bloodstream and putting a pleasant hum in his head. "So Armin, how are you and Annie doing?" Armin's face burned brightly, the blush visible like a massive beacon burning bright during the night.

"Um, we're good actually… I asked her if she wanted to come over and see a movie sometime. She's coming over Saturday to watch… well, I don't know what to be quite honest." Eren grinned, "I'd say go with a chick-flick but that doesn't seem to be Annie's type. Try a good old tear-jerker or a comedy. Plus there's always Titanic if you run out of ideas. Schindler's List might work. Oh, you guys could watch Monty Python and the Holy Grail?"

Armin pressed his hand to his forehead, a grin on his face. "I'll see, I'll see. Hopefully whatever I find won't be something she doesn't like…" Armin sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, "If only I was as good with people as I am with machines. Life would be so much more convenient." Armin sloshed his coffee around in the cup, gnawing on his lip in thought. "Hm, while I'm thinking of it, how's it going with Levi? Are you two still at each other's throats."

Eren shook his head, a smile still gracing his lips. "Nah, not anymore... I think we've managed to reach some middle ground somehow." Armin looked at him, an eyebrow raised and a smirk on his face, like he knew something Eren didn't. "What?"

"Nothing, nothing," Armin said, waving Eren's question off. "Hm, Mikasa should be done with her case by five or so. Maybe she'll loosen the reins a bit and give you some breathing room."

Eren groaned, "One can only hope. Knowing Mikasa she'll probably try to handcuff me to her and take me to court with her tomorrow. I'm honestly amazed she didn't do that today." Armin clapped a hand over his mouth, fighting to not spray his coffee all over Eren. He swallowed and let his hand drop away. "Eren, I don't think she has handcuffs."

Eren shook his head and looked Armin in the eye, "You never know what Mikasa will have or do. Remember that time she threatened to slice that one kid up and then spent the rest of the period glaring at him and sharpening those pairs of scissors? Does that prove my point?" Armin opened his mouth but no response came out.

"You've got a point there. I actually almost forgot about that to be honest." Eren bobbed his head in agreement, "I probably would have forgotten too had I not been sitting right next to her, watching her sharpen them. That class pure hell. You weren't in there with us, were you? Trust me, you didn't miss out on much." They sat there for a while longer, finishing another coffee each before they left.

Mikasa came over to Eren's apartment at six thirty, a bag of Chinese takeout clutched in one hand and a movie in the other. They settled down, all three crunched together on the couch as they tucked into their food and started the movie, The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. Talk was exchanged throughout the movie, comments of "don't do it Mr. Tumnus!" and "Edmund, how could you?" and various quotations of the movie passing back and forth between them.

Eren couldn't remember a time when they hadn't talked in the middle of a movie, either to point out something that the filmmakers had left out or completely changed or to make random and unnecessary comments. They had nearly been kicked out of a movie theater for that once. It was almost like that over the last two days had not occurred at all. Mikasa certainly made a point to stay away from anything relating to police, law, and criminals.

They finished their food halfway through the movie, stacking the Styrofoam cartons on top of each other. Eren twisted around till he could press his back against Mikasa's shoulder, his legs flung over the arm of the couch. Mikasa elbowed him in the back but he knew she didn't mind. They descended into silence, their eyes fixed on the screen, listening to the sounds of the movie and the city.

The sky was pitch black by the time Mikasa and Armin decided that it was time to leave. Armin left first, wrapping both of them in a hug before he waved goodbye and disappeared out the door. Mikasa lingered for a little while longer. Eren made her a cup of coffee and they leaned against the kitchen counter, sipping at the steaming liquid. "Eren…" Mikasa murmured after a while, breaking the silence that had fallen between them. "I'm… I'm sorry if you think I overreacted. I… I was terrified of losing you. I nearly lost you once already… Please Eren… don't do something so stupid again."

Eren pulled Mikasa in for a one-armed hug. "Don't worry, I won't." Mikasa nodded into his shoulder and took a breath. She picked her coffee mug up and rinsed it out before she set it in the sink. "I suppose I should give you your phone back." Eren smiled when she handed the phone back.

He only checked it after she had left. You have 2 Missed Calls and 3 Text Messages. Eren checked the calls first; one was from Levi, the other was from Connie. He went back and opened the text messages, his eyes skimming the contents.

To Eren:
I'm assuming that Mikasa has you under house arrest. There's nothing on the tapes – something corrupted all the data. I'm working on questioning the doctors they had on duty that night.
From: Levi
Time Received: 12:42 P.M. 10/03/13

To Eren:
Nobody knows anything - useless idiots, the lot of them. No new tips have come in yet. No new kidnappings as of yet.
From: Levi
Time Received: 10:15 P.M 10/03/13

To Eren:
Brat, whenever you get your phone back from the lawyer from hell, tell me when you can make it to the station.
From: Levi
Time Received: 9:01 A.M 9 10/04/13

Eren opened up a new message and shot Levi a quick text: I'll be in tomorrow morning (9ish). He slid the phone shut and set it down on the counter, a small smile creeping up on his face, a warm feeling bubbling in his chest. He wandered into his room, stripping quickly and changing into sweats before he turned off all the lights and slid into his bed, the idiotic smile still on his face.

The rustlings of sheets reached his ears before he realized that something heavy and warm was moving overtop him. Eren opened his eyes to the dim room, illuminated only by the silvery stream of iridescent moonlight flowing through the window. He could see the silhouette; pitch black against the feeble moonlight, the milky, silver light reflecting against the short, silky hair, far shorter than most females wore their hair. A face shrouded in shadows hovered above him; perfectly disguised by the looming darkness. The figure slowly moved up until their knees were on either side of Eren's hips, pressing firmly against them. Yep, that was defiantly male.

Two warm hands slowly edged their way onto his chest, eliciting a shiver as pale lips drew closer, stopping mere inches from Eren's own. Breath, cool and smelling of mint, ghosted over his face. Eren stared up at the shrouded face and, almost on instinct, relaxed as soft, gentle lips pressed against his own. Hands mapped out Eren's chest, leaving fiery trails across his flesh as they wandered upward. Teeth bit down on sweet lips, silently demanding entrance.

The hands that blazed across his chest were like two agonizingly slow streams of magma. They made their way to the top button of Eren's shirt and tugged until it came undone. The man firmly bit down on his lip again; impatient now. Eren hesitated; wanting so badly to let him in, but unsure if he should. Fiery heat engulfed his cheek as fingers stroked his skin. They moved to grasp his chin, tugging gently at his lower jaw in an odd half-caress. Eren let his lips fall apart and moaned as the smirking man slowly slid his tongue in, his hand dropping back down to Eren's chest. Deft fingers tugged apart button after button until the shirt could no longer cling to his chest and fell away shamelessly to reveal smooth, tan skin and pink buds.

The kiss was broken and Eren couldn't help the slight whimper that left his mouth at the lack of warmth against his lips. He received a kiss at the corner of his parted lips before those soft, skilled lips left a trail of butterfly kisses leading to the juncture between Eren's neck and shoulder. His warm tongue darted out, rasping across a small patch of skin before lips and teeth joined in to suck and nip. The man received a moan for his effort as he trailed feather-light fingers up across Eren's abdomen. The moan shifted to a gasp and his back arched back as those fingers teased his nipple. He slowly realized that his boxers were becoming painfully tight, leaving him uncomfortable and mad with the desire for release.

The man's lips vacated the spot on Eren's neck, now cold and sore, and returned to his lips. Eren wasted no time as he eagerly parted his kiss-swollen lips, silently begging him to take the invitation. Eren almost didn't register the now familiar muscle as the man's hands dipped down to trace his waistband. Skilled fingers danced across his hipbone, teasing him by edging towards his crotch before slipping farther up his abdomen. Eren groaned and whimpered in frustration as the man leaned back, pressing his hands against Eren's hips.

Blue-gray eyes glinted as the moonlight hit them just right, staring down at him with wanton passion and want that burned to be satisfied.

Eren sat up, gasping for air and fighting his mind, which was spinning with confusion. Why was it so hot? Why were his boxers so tight? What the hell time is it? Either it was late or early enough to be dark that much was certain. Eren backtracked to the second question, his mind freezing as it replayed in his head. Oh fuck me…did I really…I…I need a cold shower… He stumbled out of his room and into the bathroom, the painful constriction of his boxers not really helping.

He turned the shower on as cold as it would go and nearly ripped his clothes as he yanked them off. He would have leapt into the shower had it not been for the thought that Mikasa would kill him if she found out that he broke his neck jumping into a shower to get rid of an erection. The frigid water pounded into his back, turning his blood to ice within moments. Eren wrapped his arms around his chest as he waited for the freezing water to do its job.

It wasn't working. His thoughts kept turning to burning touches, hot lips and smoldering eyes, merely adding fuel to the rampant fire of lust that was waging a war in his mind. Against every instinct that screamed no, his had traveled down until his fingers were brushing against his raging erection, eliciting shivers that had nothing to do with the long forgotten water. His fingers ghosted down his length before he rubbed his thumb along the slit at the head, a trail of precum already beginning to leak out. Eren bit back a moan as his fingers curled tighter and he ran his hand up and down his throbbing length.

He bit his lip, holding back the needy moans that burned his throat, aching to escape. Everything was forgotten as his world narrowed down to relieving the pressure that filled him. His movements were shaky as he jerked his hand up and down his length, indecent moans and careless whimpers falling from his lips unchecked in his pleasured bliss.

He could still feel the other's touch, still imagine the fiery trails left on his skin, and still feel the heated blue-gray gaze. It wasn't his hand that he wanted to bring relief; it was another. The image was fixed in his mind; a certain raven-haired man, small in stature, but explosive in personality.

Eren felt the tight coil of heat clench even tighter, the bliss of release so close. His back arched and frigid water splashed onto his face, muffling the gasped moan of Levi as it fell from his lips. His body trembled from his orgasm as his hand fell to his side and his knees buckled, bringing him to the slick floor. He watched as the white fluid was slowly washed away by the ever-frigid water and as he came down from the best high of his life. Slowly realization of what he just did dawned on him, on just how screwed he was.

Either this is a one-time thing or I really do like…love? Levi?

Chapter 9: End

Edit: Many thanks to calleyrose, who stepped up and helped me rewrite this smut scene! Haha, goodnight you lovely darlings.

sassychina: Thank you~
calleyrose: Good point, good point. And you have an interesting theory. I love hearing theories because then I know how close or how a person is to the dot and how much of their memory needs to be wiped in order to remove that theory (mwahahaha).
Aozumi: I always feel like Mikasa has a special grudge against rapists and that's the whole reason she's a lawyer. And if you draw any scenes I would love to see them!
layer14: Not mean. I can barely tell my friends that I don't like a song they show me, let alone be mean to someone unless they make me mad (I'm very shy). Just slightly sadistic when it comes to stories.
TheOtaku2: I tried. I really did. And thank you~
forever-fangirling: We shall have to see. By we, I of course mean you. And Levi... his past will come in eventually. Once I figure out the right time.