Chapter Six: Looking

The hardest part of driving was going to be getting out of the forest to the town. For a while, Rick was able to travel along the small road that started from her house's gates, but to reach the destination using minimal gas and time, they needed to cut though the grassy forest. Rick had to drive below 10mph to make sure he didn't hit any trees. He jerked the wheel left and right, flinging the passengers against each other. Raven was already feeling fuzzy in her stomach.

Michonne put a hand on Rick's arm. "Wait." Walkers rose from the ground, ripping the overgrown vines that draped over them.

Everyone began unbuckling their seatbelts. "Daryl, Michonne and I can handle this. Rick, keep driving. Chances are there'll be more of them coming." Raven commanded. She stretched over Carl and rolled out of Daryl's door. Beth held onto Lyra so she wouldn't follow Raven.

Before she could shut the door, Carl's hand was there. "Why don't you want me to help?"

"It's not necessary." And I don't want you getting hurt.

"You shouldn't have to risk your life at all. These are our people we're looking for." Raven's strength wasn't enough, as he squeezed through the gap of the car door. Raven was about to shout, but he already scurried away. She felt irritation flood into her face. Her ears perked up to the screeching noise behind her. Raven pushed the incoming walker to the tree and drove her right dagger down its skull.

Raven and Michonne guarded the front while Daryl and Carl took the sides. They hurried along, with the car following right behind. A walker dragged its half-body towards them. Raven struck its head with her dagger. Out of the corner of her eye, she watched Michonne slice away at the walkers gracefully. She glanced back at Carl who had put a walker down with his knife. Daryl was plucking up his two used arrows from the corpses.

The car bumped up and down over the mini hills. "They're coming from the left." Carl informed them. Raven left the front to Michonne and joined Carl. She took out two with one swing, and their lifeless bodies dropped. Only a few more were left. Suddenly, she spotted a walker heading towards them. Normally from such a far distance she wouldn't worry. But something was very different about this one.

It was charging full speed at her. Raven barely saw the walker pounce on her. The air was knocked right out of her chest as they landed, her back scratching along the pointed rocks. Her blade was long gone as the walker pinned her down. She held it back by pushing its shoulders away. It snapped at her face savagely, drops of blood fell from its mouth and onto sweater.

Its head jerked to the side and it lay limp beside her. Raven quickly scrambled backwards away from the monster. Hands seized her body from behind. She shrieked and wrestled from its grip, swinging her fists at random. "Relax!" A familiar voice shouted.

She didn't even get the chance to say Carl's name. He lifted her up in his arms and ran towards the car. A walker lunged from the left. Raven kicked its face away with her boot. Two more were blocking their way. Raven's eye was hit with a bright reflection coming from Carl's belt. Her right blade.

She reached for it with her left hand while her right drew its pair. She hopped out of Carl's arms and sprinted at the two zombies. Raven had to jump to stab both walkers. They stumbled to the ground and her feet landed on their chests. She yanked her weapons out and they proceeded to the vehicle.

Daryl's head popped out of the window. "Get in!" He shouted. The door flung open and Raven and Carl dove in. A walker stuck itself in between the car and the door. Carl drove his knife into its head and kicked its face out. He slammed the door and the car jerked forwards.

At first, Raven expected to hit a tree trunk. But when she opened her shut eyes, they were driving on a cement road. She restlessly turned to the back window to see if they were following them. The walkers were left behind.

"You okay?" Raven whirled and Carl was leaning against the door. He had a red scratch below his left eye. Raven briefly remember her nail scraping something when she felt herself grabbed.

She nodded, but wanted to say more. She reached up and lightly ran her thumb over his cut, smudging away the blood. "Sorry, about that…"

Carl took her hand and put it down gently. "Don't worry about it."

She looked around and everyone was still there. Raven's heart rate was able to stabilize. When this happened, she began to think. "Actually, I think I need a minute."

When the walkers were no longer visible, they came out of the car. Raven sat beside the faint yellow lines of the road. Lyra approached her and curled up against her leg. She hasn't felt so overwhelmed by walkers since the day she lost her family. She rubbed her aching back and tried to process what she saw out there. She didn't even realize the group watching her.

Beth bent down next to her. "What happened out there?"

Raven looked at all of them, who were waiting on her explanation. How was she supposed to explain what she didn't understand? "There was an…abnormal walker. I've never seen anything like it. It came sprinting at me." They exchanged concerned and confused looks. "It was probably twice as fast as a normal person. That should be impossible."

"There was only one of 'em?" Daryl questioned. Raven nodded and waited for what they would say.

They were horrified by the idea of a new mutation of zombies, who had such incredible speed. No one wanted to believe there were more of them.

Rick spoke. "Then until we can get more information on this, we all should be twice as careful. There's nothing that can be done as of right now." They silently agreed on this. "Let's stay focused on finding the others."

Carl helped Raven onto her feet and they prepared to start driving yet again. But Raven saw something approaching down the road. They were running fast on the pavement. More of them. Raven's thoughts hissed. She whipped her blades out of her sheaths and matched their speed. It was when she drew near that she realized they weren't walkers.

The two people cowered behind their hands. Raven was already in the air. She resisted slicing them and rolled between them. She pointed her daggers at their heads, and they backed away in fear. Two grown adults afraid of a teenager. Raven's old, icy tone took over. "Who are you?" She almost stopped midsentence when her eyes stopped on the bundled blanket in the man's arms. Her eyebrow raised in realization.

"Oh my God." The lady said, her words muffled by the hand that clamped over her mouth. The man and woman saw Raven's group running over to them. She came to Daryl first and embraced him with joy. Raven was shocked to see the small wince Beth had in her eyes.

The man came up to Rick and Carl, who were unable to contain their happiness. He handed over the blanket bundle and a baby's head popped up from the cloth. Rick kissed the head and held Judith tightly in his arms. Carl, who was beaming at the long awaited reunion with his sister, took and cradled her in his grip. The man shook Rick's hand. "It's good to see you."

Rick smiled and patted his shoulder. "Same to you, Tyreese."

Raven stared at the ground while they all greeted each other. The only one beside her was Lyra who was snarling deep in her throat. Raven rubbed her thick, white fur and assured her that these were good people. But she couldn't find the energy to smile. Raven imagined herself coming across her own family. Her parents would be waving to her in front of her house. Becky and her parents would be with them too. Raven's own stupidity disgusted her. They're together all right. In a place that I can never reach.

Her old reluctance to people crept in. She blamed herself for being so undecided; she wanted Carl and the group to find their people, but at the same time she didn't want her circle to get bigger. Now that she thought of it, there were only three of them, when she had seen five before.

Beth said to Tyreese and Carol. "Where are Mika and Lizzie?"

The names seemed to strike an arrow into their chests. Carol's eyes were filled with sadness and grief. She was unable to say anything, for she'd probably tear up midsentence. She shook her head, indicating their fate.

Carl was the most shaken up. He wasn't particularly close to them, but he was the closest compared to the rest of the group. He recalled playing soccer with them and Patrick. Though Carl didn't particularly like Lizzie and Mika back then, when they were naming the walkers at the prison fence, he wished they hadn't died. It seemed like every kid he meets dies. When this thought came across his mind, he nervously glanced over at Raven, who was looking left out. He never thought about what would happen if she died. She was just so capable of herself, it just didn't seem possible for walkers to be her end. But if something happened to her…

Raven noticed Carl's gaze and gave a tiny smile. He pushed his ill-thinking away and grinned back.

Michonne headed over to Raven and Lyra. Carol and Tyreese were stunned when they caught sight of the enormous dog that looked more like a wolf. Michonne put a hand on her shoulder. "This is Raven. The only reason we were able to find you guys was because she saw you in the area a few weeks ago." Raven waved at them, but decided not to say anything.

Of course, this was followed by gracious thanks. Tyreese said to Carol, "I guess it was a good thing we didn't leave for Terminus until today."

Terminus. The name rang a familiar bell in Raven's ear. It was the supposed sanctuary miles away in distance. Obviously, she never felt the need to search for it. Beth turned to them. "Terminus? You were on your way there?"

Tyreese nodded. "Yeah. We've been following these tracks since a few days ago. We think there's a good chance of peace there."

Daryl slung his crossbow over his back. His eyes squinted from the harsh sunlight. "Looks like we all were." He hand motioned to everyone. "Me and Beth were headin' there before we ran into Rick's group. They were headin' there too."

Rick was thinking silently to himself the whole time. But he spoke now. "Since three out of our three groups saw Terminus signs and followed them, I think there's a pretty good chance that the rest of the prison group went too." This they all figured out, but they waited for Rick on his judgment. "I say we have a look. We can decide from there if we stay or not."

After Rick realized what he declared he looked over at Raven who had a hardened expression. Rick didn't mean for it to sound like that. She had a voice tinted with sarcasm, but she was becoming a little intolerant towards this situation. "So basically you're gonna leave my house, peek into Terminus and see if your friends are there and if not, or you don't like it, you'll just knock on my front door?" They all couldn't answer, ashamed of her truth. She was irritated that they thought of her home as just an emergency shelter.

After a while of silence, Raven and Lyra began making their way to the red car. Carl's steps came after her. It wasn't long before he said. "We weren't going to leave you alone. We're not that kind of people."

Raven stopped walking. So that's why. I just don't want to be alone again. But for some reason she didn't want to give in. "It's not that, Carl." She said 'Carl', but she was talking to the whole group. "I don't want to go." She corrected herself. "I can't go. This isn't what the prison was to you guys. This has been my home my whole life. My home and Lyra are all I have. I know it's selfish, but if you still had your own home, wouldn't you want the same?"

She scanned their faces and remembrance was painted all over them. Raven knew she pulled the memory string and to prove her point, she needed to make them feel pain. Rick slowly came up to her. His face was blank when he asked, "Do we matter to you?"

Raven, caught off guard, said quickly, "What?"

Rick repeated himself. "Do we matter to you?"

She remembered asking herself this the first few days she let the group stay in her house. Obviously, back then her answer was no. The question never came up again. But maybe it was because she knew the answer. Raven wanted these people safe now. "Yes."

Rick's eyes were clear as day and he spoke with stern sincerity. "Then I swear on my life, we will be back in one day. It could be the safest looking heaven on earth. But I swear we'll just check if anyone we know is there and then come straight back."

Raven wanted to believe him. He always made promises with these intense gazes. It would be hard to think he was lying. So she trusted him. "Okay."

He patted her shoulder with assurance. Rick walked past her and everyone gradually followed him. Raven trailed behind with Lyra and tried zoning away from their conversations. They were chattering and giggling about something. She knew she should talk along with them, but she wasn't in the cheeriest of moods.

Somehow, they managed to squeeze into the minivan. There were nine of them, ten including the ginormous [Okay, is ginormous not a word or am I spelling it wrong? This is the third time I tried to use it and its red underlined!] wolf-dog. Raven, practically sitting on Carl, looked out her window to distract herself. As time passed, her craned neck ached and she turned around. Carl had been caressing Judith in his arms and staring at Raven the whole time.

Carl said lowly, so no one else would hear him. "You're ignoring me."

She shrugged and replied with an equal volume. "I'm ignoring everyone."

They reached the forest path and retraced their tire tracks back to the house. They needed to get the second car if they wanted to fit the rest of the survivors. They didn't have any idea of how many people were actually at the prison; it could've been twenty or forty.

"Why?" Raven gave him an obvious look. He went on, "My dad is a man of his word, trust me." The car jerked left suddenly. Carl used a free arm to brace Raven from flinging away.

She wondered if the heat she felt on her face was visible. "I do trust you." She looked him straight in the eye. This she knew. Even though he was the youngest and rashest, Raven trusted him the most, or at least wanted to. "You know me, I have trouble accepting people at first. I want your people to be safe, but I can't bear to see any deaths." She stared at her hands and wondered how much blood she had shed just to protect herself.

Carl knew that she had trouble actually attaching herself to people. She was generous at first, but he saw that she didn't want people around. He remembered that time in his room that she sped out. "We've been on the road before, we're not completely helpless, you know." "Raven, no one will blame you. The kind of deaths you think of- those are accidents. They're not your fault."

She clenched her fists on her knees. Raven knew all of that. Yet she still has a way of connecting it to herself. When Becky got bit in the snow, she could've been walking next to her and managed to save her life. When her dad sacrificed himself so that she could escape, she could've scrambled back up that hill and saved him. When she was alone with all the time in the world she thought about this billions of times. "I have a problem, Carl." She finally said, exasperated. She raked her hand through her hair and leaned against the armrest. "I know, I do." Loneliness didn't make her fearful of befriending people. Death did.

Carl wanted her to lean into him. He wanted to stroke the back of her head and tell her it was okay, that his group was capable of defending themselves. If he weren't carrying Judith, maybe he would've, but he restrained himself.

Just then, the car came to the clearing of the mansion, except there was something different about it from when they left. There was another van parked on the front lawn in front of the gates. Three people were evaluating her home. Her home.

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Hey! I managed to squeeze in a chapter before Easter. I might edit this later on, but I'll let you know. I am feeling super lazy so I didn't proofread. The next chapter will be kinda epic, so be ready! Follow/Review if you haven't, please. Thanks, ya'll! Happy Easter! (If you celebrate it)

~Beanie Wayland