Something really terrible has happened to Isuzu. Apparently she fell from a great height and has been hospitalised. It's something that I learned from Haru, in our passing moments in the garden by the wall. He's even more stoic than usual, and this pains me even more for the contrast. The only times I've ever seen him truly smile was because of Isuzu, though their love seems to have brought more pain than good.

"Haru?" I heard him coming, which was a rarity. Normally he snuck up on me, but, instead his footfalls were heavy. His aura was dark. It scared me. I only prayed that he wouldn't go Black on me. He's now much taller than me and I wouldn't be able to defeat him.

I swung down from my branch, still keeping a safe distance. "How is Isuzu-San doing."

"Oh she's doing just fine." he had an icy calm about him.

"Then why aren't you happy about it?" He didn't answer me at first. His white shock of hair obscured his eyes, but his feelings were never louder to me.

After a few moments, he turned to me, pursing his lips to speak. "C'mon. Let's get the hell out of this place. "

His gaze was determined, and I was intrigued. "You better stay close to me, don't want you getting lost again." He huffed in response. Shoving his hands in his pockets as he walked to the climbable area of the wall.

His shoulders were stiff and his gait was still heavy. I was worried, I didn't want to be too close, and yet I wanted to stay and find out what was wrong.

I matched pace with him, looking up at him; yes up. He was taller than me now and it was infuriating beyond belief. He vaulted over the wall, waiting for me to follow. He jumped down on the other side, catching me as it was a further distance on that side. He kept me at arm's length, it'd be troublesome if he transformed now.

I led him through the sprawling neighbourhoods of the Outside Sohma's, and kept on to the hills beyond. Haru didn't seem to care where we were going, nor did he seem to mind that I was leading the way.

We came to the ruins of an old abandoned shrine a decent distance away from anything resembling civilization. I paused to look at the scene, while Haru kept walking. I jogged to catch up with him. "So, are you gonna tell me what's up?"

He stopped at the foot of the stairs, looking up at the darkening sky. "I got dumped."

I had to refrain from scoffing or even rolling my eyes. I knew not to mess with him now, he was on the very edge of going Black. The intensity of his emotions was really scaring him. Rin normally served as an outlet for his dark feelings. Something for him to focus on, a goal for him to aspire to. He always had wanted to become bigger and stronger in order to protect and support her. But now that it seemed she didn't need him anymore, he was boiling over.

"Haru…" I began. "You know, Rin is just trying to protect you. How would you have acted if you were the one tossed out a fucking window?" I walked to his side, despite his aura being utterly repulsive to me now. "Wouldn't you try to protect her? To make sure that Akito wouldn't hurt her too?"

"Yeah but…" He began to tremble, raising his hands to his face. "If it were just to protect me, wouldn't she make a show of it? Make sure everyone knew we were broken up? But no, she told me alone, no one was around. You wanna tell me that was a fucking act?"

"Maybe making a show of it would just make it worse."

"God damn it." He swore, kicking a nearby pillar.

Despite myself I grabbed his arm to try and calm him down. But when our skin made contact, It was all I could do to keep from screaming in agony. It was like holding on to a metal rod near its melting point, or standing next to a piercingly loud noise. It was painful, but he was my friend, and I had to at least try and help him.

"So what, now that Rin's out of the picture you're gonna try and get up on me?"

Fuck. He was black now. I released him, stumbling back away. "Get it together Haru!"

"Answer my question, Kanae."

"Haru, I'm your friend. You came to me didn't you?" He walked towards me, grabbing my wrist painfully.

"This hurts, doesn't it? All my darkness, it burns like a flame right?"

I writhed fruitlessly. He was the only one that I had been able to fully confess my "abilities" too. It was in confidence, but now he was using it against me. Only now did I know who I hated the most, it was Black Haru.

"Hatsuharu let me go." I said with as much authority as I could muster.

"Why, what are you gonna do?" He sneered. There was a decorative pond behind him. I had to somehow get him in there. That's how I had cured him the last time he went black on me.

I struggled and thrashed, trying to drag him backwards. It was a shame he didn't transform into some sort of small animal, otherwise I could try that. Though Haru was stronger when he went Black, he still had terrible form.

I wrenched my hand from his grip, ducking up his arms, zipping behind him and attempting to get him off balance. When that didn't work, I instead started moving backwards towards to pond, taunting him with kicks and punches until he was out right pursuing me. When we reached the edge of the pond, I punched him in the stomach, then kicked at his legs, ducking back as lumbered forward on the sloped shore.

He still managed to take me down with him, I'll give him that.

"Ahh…that's refreshing." I heard him say.

"Haru I swear next time you do that, I will fucking kill you." I was just pissed now, and cold. Annoyed and sad. I felt betrayed above all else. It was really unfortunate. He was starting to go Black less and less up until now.

I trudged out of the pond, more saddened than disgruntled. "C'mon. We should go back before either of us catches cold." I was even more put off by the fact that Haru seemed to have figured it out, the fact that at some point over the course of our fucked up lives, I had fallen in love with him.

It was stupid and futile, and the heart was always so damn fickle.

"Kanae?" I didn't look at him. I couldn't look at him. I couldn't even be within one metre of him.

"Haru let's just go home." I could hear him sloshing towards me, so I just kept walking.

"Is that what you hate the most?"

I didn't answer him. I just kept walking, my arms wrapped around myself as I began to shiver. He was kind enough to keep his distance, since, he did know how his nearness affected me.

After a while, I finally found the will to speak. "Haru, you're the only one besides Misaki who really knows about my stupid Empathy. And while you were Black you used that to hurt me. I'm sorry but I really don't feel like even being around you."

"Then, I just hope you find someone."

"Huh?"

"I hope you find someone that you can truly trust."

"I can just you Haru but, only half of you."

"That's what I meant."

I sighed, looking down. Slowing my pace to match him more. "Haru, you don't understand. It's not just Zodiac members that have this contradiction, everyone has it." I said. "Everyone has two sides. Their "outer" self and "inner". There's always dissonance, conflict and turmoil within everyone's minds. I haven't ever met anyone who defied that."

"You haven't met everyone yet, so maybe you will." He grabbed me gently by the hand, and I started to feel calm. When he was White, I felt almost normal. I could actually touch him, and smile genuinely. It was one of those things that was too good to be true. I only wished that I could believe him.

I started to shake again, this time with impending tears. Haru put his arm around me, holding me to his side, urging me to walk. "Kanae, I'm sorry." He said softly. I squeezed my eyes shut, hoping that I wouldn't cry. "I really hope that you can find someone, to hold you when the tears come." He sounded almost sad, I didn't want him to feel sorry for me, it was useless, the way we were couldn't ever change, not so easily at least.

"Thank you Haru…"

"For what?"

"For trying."