(A/N) Sorry that this chapter was late, but the next one will be on time as it has been near completion for some time.

Enjoy!

I was sprawled out on Kagura's floor, as I would sometimes be on weekends. She was there lying on her bed with an honest-to-god diary open. She was humming along idly to the generic pop music we were listening to.

Well, she was listening to it, I was attempting to tune it out, but to little avail.

"Kagura." I said.

"Hm? What is it?"

"I'm supposed to go to the main house tonight." I said.

"…why?"

"A meeting with the other Utaji."

"…you don't seem too happy about that."

"Because I'm not." I rolled over onto my side, looking up at her. "I'm thinking about skipping. What should I do?"

Kagura peeked over the edge of her bed at me. "What's this Kanae, are you asking me for advice?" She said with a cheeky grin.

"Sorry it's not about boys or whatever. But yeah, I guess I am."

"You know that doesn't matter to me." She giggled lightly. "But, this is kinda serious. What do you think the consequences will be?"

I shrugged. "Akito will get mad, maybe threaten to cut off my school funding or something." I mused. "But, I can apply for scholarships and student aid."

"But Kanae, don't you like singing?"

"I do…I really do but…but not like that."

"I thought you did a wonderful job." She said sincerely.

"That's not the problem." I propped myself up on my elbows. "There's just something wrong with the others. And it really isn't something I'm interested in discovering for myself."

"Like…how so? What did you sense from them?"

"That's the thing. I hardly sensed anything. They all kinda reminded me of White Haru, unnaturally…empty."

She sat up, swinging her legs over the side of the bed, patting the space next to her. I stood up, complying with her direction.

"So, maybe they all do…meditation or something."

I shook my head. "No, no way. Kazuma is a disciplined man and has a pure aura, but not stark white. It's different, trust me."

"I believe you, I'm just not sure what you're getting at."

I gave a frustrated sigh. "I…I don't really either….but." My eyes shot open, and I whipped around to look at Kagura. "I—I remember!"

"Remember what!?" Matching my frantic tone out of sheer surprise.

"I—I knew Tomomi before! He went to my middle school, and, it was just when I was learning to sense auras!" I looked, down, concentrating. I closed my eyes, willing the memory to come into focus.

"Kanae, is Tomomi one of the other's?"

"Yes!" My eyes shot open. "Kagura! I looked at her again, letting my dormant fear taint my expression a little. "Kagura, his aura was green."

Some of the shock filled her face then. "Kanae, are you saying…"

"He wasn't always like that! Something happened to him, and I'm sure, that the others were once vibrant colours of their own!"

Kagura looked at me solemnly. "So, what are you going to do?"

I pressed my lips into a thin line, pondering.

"I told you, I'm not going to sing this year because when I did…last year…I could…I could feel it."

"…feel…what?" Her tone wavering a bit, as there was a part of her that already knew the answer.

"I-…I…" It was something that I couldn't put words to. Was it "God?" or something else? Something more sinister. The "God" that the zodiac knew couldn't be the end-all be all. If he were, why would such an infinite and unimaginable being let himself be caught up in the lives of thirteen mortal creatures?

I shook my head. "Kagura…I don't wanna talk about this anymore."

She huffed. "Hey…you were the one who brought it up!"

"I know, Kagu but…" My eyes lost focus when I was looking at her. I let my vision blur so that I could see the true colours better. "The boar-spirit is making me uneasy."

"Huh?"

"He…he doesn't seem to like me-" The black stan suddenly ignited like a flame, and I clutched my head, crying out in sudden pain.

Kagura's hands found me, trying to steady and comfort me, but I threw myself back. Her touch only making the pain intensify.

"Kanae! Kanae what's wrong!?" Her voice was distorted and wavering in and out. I could see her face, knit with worry, but I had to get away, stay away.

I choked out some gibberish, trying to communicate to her… "K-kagu-"

Suddenly the door behind me swung open, I looked over to see Kagura's mother with an expression to match her daughter's.

"Kagura, Kanae! What's going on-?" I must have looked pretty awful, I could hardly move, the pain was bad. Almost as bad as Black Haru, but not quite.

Kagura's mom placed an arm gently around me, and guided me out and away, I wasn't sure where, but without thinking, I snuggled myself against her chest without a word. She didn't mind, and I sure as hell didn't. Her aura was paradise compared to any of the spirits'.

After a while, I came fully to. I found myself wrapped in a blanket sitting on a couch with tea clutched in my somehow even paler fingers.

"…Kanae-chan?" The concerned face of Kagura's mom came into focus. I didn't see where Kagura was at the time. "How are you feeling…Kanae-chan?"

I sniffed, taking a sip of tea. "I'm fine, Obasan." I muttered. "I just had one of my attacks, I'm fine now."

She nodded. "Yes but, Misaki-chan just told me that they often happen when you're in crowds."

"They can be triggered in other ways."

She nodded. "You're sure you're alright. You know that you can stay here as long as you want."

I shook my head. "I'm fine really. I have somewhere to be." I regarded her kindly. "Thanks…though."

It was dark and dank inside of the Main House, as it always was. I was lead stiffly by silent servants through the bleak corridors. I was out of place, for one. I had only started to notice that all the house staffers had bleak white auras. I never noticed before because, well, it's just that. They don't really have a presence for me to notice.

Our footsteps hardly made a sound on the worn bamboo, and no one said a word. The head Sohma elder took over when I neared my destination. It seemed that there were areas in this place that were off limits to even the full-time servants.

She looked at me briefly, with those same cold eyes that I always remembered. I hardly thought of her as a person, as she would seemingly just appear and disappear whenever she pleased. I only ever saw at the worst points in my life; when the crushing constraints of the Sohma Family were tightened further around me.

Honestly, I realised, that I don't even know her name. I don't know if anyone does.

She guided me into the Utaji's chambers. Past the entry way to the back room where the others were.

Hisoka, Shigemi, Tomomi and Yoh were all there; seated before Kotoko who was smiling softly.

"Kanae-san. We are overjoyed that you could join us." Icy, empty smiles slid over their faces. Tomomi even gestured for me to sit by him. Though I felt my stomach turn, I complied. Not wanting to raise any suspicion.

It was worse now, that I remembered how his Aura once was. It was a rare spring green, like something alive and jubilant. But now, it was like he didn't even exists.

I knew that I should feel comfortable around them. They were all like me after all. Psychics, Empaths and Espers. But I couldn't. It caused an aversion. I don't know how the others could handle it.

Kotoko began to speak. Outlining the yearly procedure. This year's dance was between Momiji and Hatori, and so the musical repertoire would have to be shifted to accommodate the New Year we would be greeting.

No, no. I couldn't do it again. If I did I'd be lost. There'd be nothing left.

I got to my feet suddenly, interrupting Kotoko as she spoke. "Kanae-san? Is something the matter?"
"No, not at all." I raised my eyes to her, even though she couldn't see. "But, I came only because I wished to inform you that I will not be performing at this year's banquet."

There wasn't any shock on their faces or in their auras.

The silence was shattered by a terrifying sound.

I turned around, and saw the old woman convulsing like she were having a seizure. She was making some horrible huffing and hacking noise.

Only when she stopped to speak did I realise that it was meant to be laughter.

"Oh…Kanae, aren't you a romp. It has been ever so long since we've had a comedian amongst the Utaji!" The rusty broken wheezing continued, until I attempted to push past her.

When I did, she went dead silent and her witch's claw clamped down on my wrist.

"-let- let me-go!" I struggled to say, as somehow, her empty aura seemed to freeze so terribly that it too, burned.

"You are not going anywhere Utaji. You think you have the right to leave? You have no rights. You belong to this family and you will do as you are told!" She released me, flinging me to the ground.

She loomed over me, glaring down at me with a look full of contempt and pride.

I didn't need to stand for this. I was being held against my will.

"…fuck you, you old hag!" I spat.

I think she aimed to stomp on me, but I rolled skilfully out of the way. Launching myself from my haunches into the hallway. It was by no means a graceful exit, but it was an exit nonetheless. There were people calling after me, but I was fast. They wouldn't catch me. They could yell and harass me later but they wouldn't do anything drastic, would they?

After turning corner after corner I eventually lost a bit of my agility and slid painfully into one of the wooden walls, and I rested there for a moment, attempting to catch my breath.

"…Kanae…san?" I looked up to see one who I regrettably learned to hate seeing.

"…Hato…ri…" I panted.

He looked behind me, giving an indignant grunt before snatching me up in a bridal-style carry.

"H-harori-?" His arms were long enough so that I was balanced away from his body.

"Shh, I found you collapsed and I am giving you medical leave."

"Will anyone believe that? Also who-" another servant rounded the corner, shouting inquires until she gathered who she was yelling at. Hatori kept replying coolly that I was in need of medical attention, and was unfit to fulfil my duties. Still, how did he know? Did someone—

I couldn't put my arms around his neck like any normal person in a bridal carry, if I did, it would get bad really fast. So instead, I had to just awkwardly grip with shit whilst still trying to look as limp as possible.

I was far from comfortable, but, eventually, we made it to his office, and he let me down on the examination bed.

"Hatori…" I said after a brief silence.

"I am not the one you should be thanking. It was actually Kagura's mother who came to me with concerns."

"She…she what?"

He turned in his swivel chair, looking at me over his glasses. It looked like he had already started in on his paperwork. "Not long ago, she came to me saying that you had a serious attack earlier while just being around Kagura. So, I cannot in good faith allow you to attend the Banquet where all of the Juunishi will be gathered."

"But, come on. All the other Utaji have abilities like me right? Will anyone buy that excuse?"

"It's not just an excuse. It is genuinely concerning." He clicked his pen and turned back to his desk. "Also, most Utaji, and Kiireji in general can only hear the voices of the spirits. Your ability is a rare one that is only born into this family at very specific times."

"Huh…?"

He sighed, looking back at me briefly. "During the times when all of the Juunishi are assembled, accordingly, one with stronger Empathic abilities is born. The situation has always been different, but it has been documented before."

"…Right…"

I entwined my fingers together uneasily. "Can I leave now?"

"Not quite." He pushed himself up from his desk, approaching me. "You never showed up for a follow-up appointment after your…incident"

"…right."I frowned.

He took out his examining tools. Shining a light down my throat, checking my eyes and my breathing.

"Tell me…Have you seen Hatsuharu since then?"

"No…well. I did a few days after, but after that…not since. I mean, besides from seeing him at school."

"I see." He put his tools away, stepping back. "Everything seems fine, but you are still somewhat fragile. So be careful."

"Yeah…I know…" I hopped of off the exam table, walking swiftly past him. When I reached the door, I paused, looking back at him. "Hatori…" I said.

"Yes? Kanae?"

I pondered what I was going to say. My eyes were locked on him while I tried to sense his aura. It too was changing. I could glimpse a brightening shimmer. "Thank you."