Now this one definitely requires tissues! This is supposed to be it for this fic but every time I sit down and try to write something else I end up writing more of this universe so maybe keep an eye out for some more little looks into this verse.
Jessica climbed out of her car and stood on the sidewalk, looking up at the townhouse for a few moments and allowing all of the memories from all the time she had spent there wash over her. It wasn't until her daughter tugged at her hand and her wife slipped an arm around her from behind that she snapped back to the present with a blink. Bending down she scooped her little girl up into her arms, surreptitiously checking the street as she mounted the steps. She wished she could be surprised that there was already a small gathering of reporters and a news van massed a semi-respectable distance from the house, nothing was sacred anymore but the hospital would be getting a reminder of the confidentiality agreement they had signed before the day was through.
Once inside she followed the sound of quiet conversation to the kitchen where her mom and dad and aunt were gathered around the breakfast bar drinking tea.
"Hey," she said quietly, drawing all of their attention and gladly walking into her mother's embrace. The call they had all been dreading for months had come and she knew that her brothers and cousins were all flying across the country to be there, she had been on her way out to the car, dragging her family along behind her, before her mother had finished telling her what was going on.
"Hey sweety," she felt her mom press a kiss to her forehead and then to her daughters, "Thanks for coming so quickly."
"You know I wouldn't be anywhere else," she said, letting Randi down to go see her Pops and accepting a hug from her aunt, pleased when she stepped back and Kat's calming presence was with her immediately
"They've made her comfortable," her mom reached out and squeezed her hand, her wife squeezing her shoulder at the same time, "She's been asking for you, why don't you go up?"
"I'll keep an eye on Randi, take your time baby and call if you need one of us." she turned into Kat's body, buried her face in the other woman's neck and took a deep breath and tried to psych herself up for what she knew was going to be one of the toughest conversations of her life. She felt Kat's arms tighten around her, a kiss pressed to her temple, "You're ok my love." with another deep breath she stepped away, gave the other woman a tight smile and turned for the stairs.
Pushing her way into the room she tried to ignore the telemetry that had followed her from the hospital as she took a seat on the edge of the bed.
"Hey Grams," she said quietly, taking the hand closest to her and squeezing the fingers lightly.
"Jessica?" her grandmothers voice was rough but the eyes which turned to her were still bright. Andrea hadn't changed much since her Grandma Randa had died, her hair was much more silver than brown now, the wrinkles on her face deeper, but she had continued to be active and full of life right up until her diagnosis.
"That's right," she leant forward and pressed a kiss to the older woman's forehead, settling back into her seat, closer than she had started so they could talk quietly, "How are you?"
"Well you know," Andrea's chuckle turned into a hacking cough and Jess moved to her side and helped her take a sip of water. "I'm ok, stay up here with me wont you?" Jess settled onto the bed next to the older woman and allowed herself to be pulled into her side. They lay in silence for several long moments and Jess took comfort of her Grams' steady breathing against her ear.
"I'm going to miss you Grams," she said quietly, hating that her voice was choked and her eyes were wet with tears.
"Oh honey," she could feel the woman's fingers sifting through her hair and took comfort in the familiar action, "I wish I didn't have to leave, you've all got so much life to live and I wish I could stick around and see it but I'm so tired my darling, I can't fight it anymore."
"I know Grams, I don't want you to be hurting, I want you and grandma back together, I just wish it could be here with us."
When she woke up she knew it had happened, the house felt different, stiller somehow, than it had for the last few days, at peace. Rolling onto her side she watched over her wife and her daughter who were sprawled over the other side of the bed and allowed the tears to fall. In part they were tears of relief, she'd hated seeing her Grams in pain, hated seeing her going in and out of hospital and hated catching the flash of pain in her eyes when she thought of her wife, but, selfishly, she wished that she could have held on, that they could have had even a little more time together. Pressing a kiss to her daughters head she slid from bed, needing to be somewhere where she could feel close to both of her grandparents. Sliding into the study they had shared she was only half surprised to find her aunt curled up in the corner of the sofa, one of the many family albums spread across her lap.
"Hey," she said quietly, curling herself into the empty space and resting her head on her aunts shoulder, the older woman's eyes were red and puffy, confirming further what had happened through the night.
"Hey sweetheart, are you ok?"
"I'm going to miss her," she said quietly and she felt a kiss pressed to her head before the older woman began to flick through the album again and she allowed the tears to fall freely again, mourning what they had lost, what they had had. She watched the images in the album which predated her, her mom and her aunt, still teenagers with masses of red hair, still looking very much the identical twins they were but had grown out of somewhat as they got older (and her aunt had had some work done!). Her Grams was younger, maybe even younger than she herself was, but still with that contagious grin that she was so well known for and her Grandma Randa was everything you would expect of the Editor in Chief of Runway Magazine.
"We gave her so much shit in the beginning," the older woman chuckled, stopping at a picture of Grams covered in mud, glaring at an equally muddy St Bernard as the twins looked on smirking, not a speck of dirt on them.
"Why?" she'd only ever seen how much love there was between them all and although she had heard snippets of how the family had come to be she had never known all of the details.
"We were pranksters and your grandmothers assistants were prime targets for us. We nearly got Ma fired the first time she delivered the book, talked her into bringing it upstairs instead of leaving it in the hall. She walked right into the middle of a fight between mom and her husband at the time."
"Oh shit,"
"Mhm, that was the time mom demanded she get us the unpublished Harry Potter manuscript in the space of about six hours or not bother going back. I still don't know how Ma managed it but she got it for us. After that though, and every other thing we pulled over the years, it's a wonder we ever managed to be a family."
"She loved you guys like you were her own," she said quietly, running her fingers lightly over the smiling faces in the photograph, "Did they ever try to have more kids?"
"I know they talked about it, Ma always said that she had never thought about having a family until us but I think mom was really into the idea of them having a child together. Thinking about it there was a time when Ma got really depressed and Mom got super protective so I don't know. They told us they might try but then we heard nothing else about it."
"You think they tried and it didn't work out?" she knew how that was, how much you didn't want to tell anyone you were even trying until you knew for sure that something had stuck, the feeling when it didn't work after so much time and energy, Cassidy shrugged and continued flicking.
"They could have done, I know mom wouldn't push if it didn't work out the first time, she hated hurting Ma. They just never spoke about it again."
"They really were soul mates weren't they?" she sighed, noticing that the other woman had stopped again on a picture from their wedding day. Her Grams was grinning into the camera, her grandmother smiling lovingly up at her new wife, they both looked so happy and it made Jessica glad that, wherever they were, they were back together again where they belonged.
"Oh yeah, I didn't think I'd ever see mom really happy until Ma came along. I honestly don't think it would have worked so well if Ma hadn't worked at Runway first, it meant she understood the pressures Mom was under and didn't get snarky if she had to miss dinner or she was late home. Mom changed for her too though."
"Their relationship is what I aspire to."
"You don't think you have that with Kat?"
"I think we have parts of it, I like to think she's my soul mate and god I love her but I know few people are lucky enough to have it all. Grams and Grandma, they got their one in a million chance, I'm just glad they get to be together again."
She tried not to look at the coffin as she passed it to reach the lectern, pulled out her flashcards and took a deep steadying breath before she looked up to face the gathered people. She had asked to do the eulogy, had spent hours working on it, but now she was there she wasn't sure that she could do it. It wasn't until her eyes found her wife in the second row that her resolve solidified.
"Grams was many things before my brothers, cousins and I came along. She was a daughter, a sister, a best friend and a colleague. She was a partner, a wife and an unsuspecting step-ma. Then we all came along and she was Grams, then later Great Grams.
Anyone who met her would say that she was contagiously happy, she always had a smile ready for anyone and I don't think I ever saw her truly mad, although having heard some of the tales of what my aunt and my mom got up to I imagine she did get a little mad sometimes.
I think a lot of people were surprised when Grams and Grandma got together but all I have ever known of them was how much they loved each other, how much they were meant to be together, that they were soul mates." She paused, took a deep breath, willing the tears she could feel burning in her eyes to stay where they were until she finished,
"She proved the people who accused her of only being with Grandma for her name and for her money wrong by working hard to make her own name first in journalism where she won several awards for pieces on refugee crises across the globe and Presidential elections closer to home. Later she took on the literary world, writing novels at the same time as working as an editor for an esteemed publishing house. Even doing all of this, she made the time to build a happy, safe home for first her step daughters and then for her grandchildren.
When we lost Grandma, Grams was the strongest woman I have ever met, stronger than all of us, even though it was obvious that her heart was breaking. She held our family together and offered us a safe place to remember her.
I'm going to miss her so much, we all are, but I know that I at least find a small amount of comfort in knowing that whatever comes after this life, Grams and Grandma Randa are there together now, where they are meant to be." The tears were falling now and she moved back to her seat, pressing her hand against the coffin as she passed before sliding back into her space, accepting her daughter back into her lap and burying her face in the little girls hair.
"You're ok sweetheart, I've got you." Kat murmured and she sank into the arm which looped around her shoulder as her heart broke.
"Randi, don't run too far ahead," she said, her arm wrapped around Kat who was pushing the stroller. It was a nice day, the oppression of the freezing winter and early spring seemed to have lifted and it was a perfect day for the families first real trip out as a foursome. Randi was skipping along in front of them, the baby was asleep and she and Kat were content to just take their time.
"You ok?" Kat asked, twisting to press a kiss to her cheek,
"Yeah," she offered her wife a smile and squeezed her waist. It had been seven and a half months since they had buried Andrea and although it was easier, Kat knew that her wife's heightened emotions meant that the tears could come at any time. They hadn't known at the time that Jess was pregnant but she knew her wife wished they had so that she could have shared the news with her Grams before they died. It was such a long process with such a high possibility of failure that they hadn't even told anyone they were trying again until they knew that it had stuck, but she knew Jess wished that out of anyone she had at least told the older woman so that she could have known she was going to be a Great Grandmother again.
"There was no way you could have known darling," Kat said quietly and yet again Jess marvelled at how well the other woman knew her,
"I know, I just..."
"Hey," Kat pulled them to a halt and turned to wrap her arms more fully around her, "She was so proud of her, they both were and wherever they are they are still keeping an eye on you. You need to let go of all of the buts and maybes love, they wouldn't want you to feel like this."
"I know," Jess sighed and offered a small smile, "I'm sorry. I love you."
"I love you too darling, now come on, let's introduce Andrew to his great grandmothers and get home, your mom and dad will be waiting and if we leave her too long your mother will have cleaned the place down!"