Chapter Three: Dark Lord of the Wizarding World.
Reviews!
Guest chapter 1 . May 8
Give it up and write something else because as a rewrite this still makes no sense. I don't care if Peter died, there is still no logical reason for Harry to end up in such an abusive situation with the Dursleys. Without Dumbledore forcing it, there is no reason they had to accept care of Harry. They could have simply declined muggle child services. If they did take him then Harry would have been monitored by child services and with no blood wards then there is no reason people would not found out about the abuse. In canon he was not physically abused. If you want to show that kind of abuse then you need an explanation of why no one noticed and you have no magical reason.
Sorry, but this is a really bad start. Beyond there being no reason the Dursleys should have voluntarily accepted Harry, your first chapter is mostly an info dump with irritating time skip notices all over it. When you write a story, if you need to put in so many time skip warings then you're not writing a story. You wrote an outline.
Alllright, let's see ... No, not giving up. Yes, the rewrite makes no sense, because it is STILL IN PROGRESS, you know, as in, STILL BEING WRITTEN. Of course it's not going to make much sense, things will be explained in this chapter. Secondly, the Dursleys DID have a reason. This wasn't cloak-and-dagger, this was Child care services showing up at the Dursleys door likely in broad daylight. The Dursleys GREATLY value their image in their neighborhood, to publicly turn away a small child that is their relative, would cast them in a negative light. Something they would not allow. Harry WOULD have been monitored by child services, if someone called them. But someone did not. There are no blood wards, but there is no-one to find out about the Abuse. Not like wizards know he's alive, and the Muggles have the abuse hidden - albeit poorly - from them. In canon he was not physically abused. Well, guess what. This is not cannon! Surprise! Holy shit, this isn't the ACTUAL book! WHO KNEW! If you want to know why no-one noticed, i'm sure people DID notice, but they didn't report it. You'd be surprised how often that happened. Moving on, yes the first chapter is mostly an info dump. That's usually how ALL first chapters are. ' when you write a story ' I am WRITING the story, it is not DONE. Wait, kindly, and you will see the end result. I am writing a story, but every story starts with an OUTLINE. However, if you people would like me to go back and - revise - chapters one and two to include more of his Childhood, please. By all means. Sound off in the reviews and let me know. I've two Betas reading this too, so I expect their opinion on it as well.
Well, that's all. Onto the story!
Wizards were fickle creatures, Kallig decided, dropping the final tome on the ground. He had read all of his Hogwarts books - for the first year at least - in three days, and returned them for a full refund and purchased more books on history. There was no need to keep them. They were all old, worn, torn. Used. If he had learned anything in life, it was that once something was used it was discarded as worthless, so he would not hold anything deemed worthless among his possessions.
He quietly stalked back to the Leaky Cauldron with several new books, half of which he'd already read. A cube in his hand that he glared at as he walked. He received it in the middle of the night, along with a letter from Gringotts. This Cube, while intricate, and radiating power, was utterly worthless to him. He had tried for hours on end to fruitlessly open it, with no success.
According to the tomes on wizarding history that he'd already read, Wizards were silly, fickle things. Intent on their political games, but there were several so far that he'd come across that he knew would have to be eliminated, but for now should be avoided. The Flamels, for one. Notorious for achieving immortality. The five ruling families of Egypt were to be avoided at all costs until he discovered his powers to the fullest extent and massed a powerful army. They were masters of Dark Magic and Necromancy, he would stand no chance against them alone.
Albus Dumbledore, he would have to be cautious around the old man. From what he had read, the man had taken down a powerful dark lord, but allowed another one to rise under his very nose. That showed it was possible, but the old man would be looking for the signs now. He would have to be cautious, VERY cautious, But he could still operate in Hogwarts. It would take time, skill, and subtlety, but he had all these things and more. For now, though, he was more concerned with getting to the platform on time.
Gathering his equipment and supplies, packing them away into a trunk, he simply left. Nodding to Tom the bartender as he left the Leaky Cauldron. It would be a long walk to the station, but he was used to such things. His childhood with the Dursleys made sure that he was used to walking long distances alone, though it was true it was mostly his want that had him walking, not the Dursleys shoving him out. He did not mind, it allowed him to get a layout of the city, and kept him rather well-fit for an eleven year old boy. It was something he took pride in, noticing most of his peers were either horribly obese or stick-thin. Nearly out of the Alley, he paused, mentally slapping himself for his idiocy. Why walk to the station when he could use the Floo in the leaky cauldron? Mentally berating himself, he walked back into the Cauldron, nodding to Tom as he placed a few Sickles on the counter as payment, grabbing a pinch of Floo powder and tossing it into the fire, clearly and withought hesitation pronouncing king's cross station, and stepping in. Stomach churning in protest as he stumbled out of another fireplace, seeing a wizarding family leaving the room, and deciding to follow them. Stopping momentarily to gaze at the Station, marveling at the train, before snapping out of his reverie as he spotted a familiar raven-haired girl who had glared at him before, Daphne, and her family.
Mentally shrugging, he decided to do as he said, walking straight past them and getting onto the very last compartment on the train, satisfied to see it empty. He quietly sat down, watching the platform, examining Daphne as she chatted with her sister and family. He was not sure how long he was watching, but he was snapped out of it when the five minute whistle sounded. When he looked back to the Family, he found Daphne now looking at him. He merely nodded at her, idly wondering how one could make their eyes appear icy, and slid back out of view, resting on the seat and waiting. He did not have to wait long.
Indeed, soon enough Daphne was boarding the train and walking towards the rear-most compartment. Lugging her trunk along with her as she walked, quietly hoping Tracy would have gotten there before her. She did not want to be alone with the Child who had not so much as introduced himself to her, and yet knocked three Purebloods on their arse with wandless magic. At the age of eleven. Sadly, lady luck was not on her side, as when she pushed the door open she found Kallig sitting alone, trunk already put away and sitting on the bench with his legs crossed in a meditative pose. Keeping her mask of indifference on, she sat down and pulled out her wand, casting Wingardium Leviosa on it in order to lift it up onto the racks above.
Kallig mentally voiced both his approval, and displeasure. He was pleased she knew some magic, that would make her a good ally. But he was greatly displeased with how most wizards used magic as an excuse to be lazy. Why pick it up when they can summon it? Why lift it up when they have the levitation charm? Why make it when they can conjure it? It irked him, greatly. Magic was, to be sure, superior over Muggle technology at this stage at least, but that did not mean they had to use it for every little thing. Physical exercise was important, even when concerning Magic.
He closed his eyes again, meditating, before his eyes snapped open as the door to the carriage slammed open.
Well, that's all. Next chapter will be up, and may, MAY, have some filler. Don't want to rush things, I have seven years afterall.