"Agh, too bright!" Manny complained when he climbed out of the ground. The sun's golden fingers poked him viciously in the eyes. Squinting, he pulled up Hanny out, who pulled Mint out next. The Eterna City residents, not acting their age in the slightest, sprung out of the ground like Digletts.

"Wow, is it Spring already?" the Underground Man remarked, shading his eyes against the burning day-star. Green leaves coloured the resurrected trees, and everywhere was the sound of Starly chirping. Blinking, Manny turned on his cell phone which he had neglected all this time.

"He's not kidding. It was the middle of January when we went Underground; now it's the beginning of April! Also, I have fifty-seven voice mails and two-hundred and thirty-six text messages. They're all from Mom."

He read through a few of the texts.

"'Manny, where are you? Come home'.; 'Manny, I miss you so much, where have you gone?'; 'Manny, why aren't you answering your phone?'; 'Manny, don't you remember your mother?'"

Silently, Hanny and Mint checked their cell phones. Their eyes dilated until you could see the whites all around the irises.

"We forgot to tell our parents where we were!" Hanny choked. "One of these text messages says that I've been declared legally dead!"

"Oh no, I forgot to tell Mom to tape the new season of Heroes!" Mint cried. The three of them immediately dialed their respective parents. A few minutes passed, consisting of shouting, crying, and threats from the other end of the line. Manny, Hanny and Mint ended the conversations with grimaces on their faces.

"My parents are coming over, like, right now to pick me up," Hanny said, looking as though she had swallowed her tongue.

Manny moaned, attempting to tear out his hair. "My Mom is gonna gut me like a Magikarp!"

Mint scratched the back of his head, his face dark red with shame. "My Mom told me I'm just like my Dad and hung up on me."

Manny failed at self-induced baldness, so he flumped on the ground instead. Minutes later he heard the sound of vast, beating wings. He turned his head, and there was a Tropius the size of a helicopter carrying a man on his back. Joining him was a woman, riding a Dragonite that could peek into the second floor of a building. The giants landed quite near, knocking Mint off his feet.

"Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad," Hanny greeted them as though she were announcing a death in the family.

"Hannah, you are banned from turning off your cell phone from now on," her mother declared. "I swear, we must have searched everywhere from Snowpoint to Canalave to Sunyshore City!"

Her father threw up his hands in exasperation. "We checked every town and Gym in the region, but only Roark had seen you and that boy Rowan sent you with. We were desperate enough to ask Aaron if, by chance, he had seen a couple of kids wandering around, but he said nobody could enter Victory Road with just one badge."

Mint gawped, jaw buried in the ground. "THE Aaron?"

"He's a friend of the family," Hanny murmured, scuffing her toes while looking everywhere but at her parents.

Her mother heaved a loud sigh, kneeling to embrace her daughter, who returned the intimate gesture halfheartedly. "You are only ten years old, for goodness's sake, Hanny, we were so worried about you!"

Hannah took a deep breath. "I expect I'm grounded for several years."

"Quite the opposite! Now that we've found you, we can declare you not dead, remove your 'Missing' posters from all the milk cartons, and finally go on a vacation by ourselves," her father said in a much cheerier mood.

Hanny sputtered. "What, was the second honeymoon a business trip?"

Her mother chuckled, standing beside her husband and patting Hanny's head. "No, we just really like the idea of finally having time to ourselves after ten years of raising you."

Her father also patted Hanny's head. "Don't worry; you have your Pokémon to take care of you now. You don't need us anymore."

"Are you nuts? I'm TEN YEARS OLD!" Hanny yelled.

Her father gestured at Manny and Mint who raised their eyebrows. "But you made friends with these two guys. Isn't it some kind of rule that you travel together in a group, going on all sorts of adventures, thus achieving maturity together?"

Hanny flailed her arms. "Maturity? I'm still in primary school!"

Her father guffawed. "You're excused from school if you choose to raise Pokémon, so say goodbye to all the friends you made since infancy!"

Her mother interrupted, grabbing her father's arm. "Look, just keep your phone on so we know that you're still breathing." She turned to her husband. "Come on, hun, the Resort said they have a discount for when we return!"

She flounced onto her huge Dragonite. The father scrambled onto the enormous Tropius's back, and the two lifted off towards the east.

"Does this mean you're an orphan now?" Mint asked Hanny. She bopped him on the head before stomping southward to the city's Gym.

The Underground Man waved goodbye. "You kids come back anytime you want, you hear?"

He cackled as Manny and Mint followed Hannah in numb silence.

888

Upon entering Eterna Gym, the Trainers felt as though they were back in Floaroma Town. Instead of a cold hard floor, there was lush green grass speckled with a rainbow of flowers and fanciful water fountains. Hanny charged past the entrance but an oddly dressed man blocked her way. He had curly brown hair, a moustache, wore sunglasses, a purple shirt, tan vest and brown slacks.

"Hi Hanny!" he greeted her with an uncomfortable level of familiarity.

"Wha! How do you know my name, and why are you barefoot?"

"The grass is good for walking on. I see that you've brought Manny and Mint with you. One of you is a Champ in training!"

She waved a Pokéball menacingly under the stranger's moustache. "No seriously, how do you know our names? Do I have to sic Orric on you?"

The man backed off, holding up his hands in surrender. "I am required by law to inform you that I have six restraining orders placed upon me, but really, I just want to help Trainers like you."

Hanny lowered her attack turtle. "I'm going to take that with a barrel of salt. Who were you stalking?"

The odd man counted fingers. "The current Pokémon Champions of the Kanto, Johto and Hoenn regions, and their rivals. One pair per region. I have a sixth sense, you see…"

Manny rolled his eyes. "And next you shall be asking us to ride in your candy-van."

Mint raised his hand. "Ooooh! I call dibs on the candy!"

The stranger held out his hands in supplication. "Please hear me out. I get a feeling from Trainers like you." He pointed at the boys. "I can sense that Manny and Mint are rivals, but you…" he pointed at Hanny, "…are just tagging along. By my brilliant deduction, either Manny or Mint will be the next Pokémon Champion."

She laughed at the stranger. "You're loony. This blockhead," she ribbed Manny, "didn't even know how to catch Pokémon when I met him, and Mint is so slow that he's going backwards."

"Soon I shall regress into a fetus, then disappear altogether!" Mint said with big, sad eyes.

The stranger shook his head, then lifted an all-knowing index finger. "Well, I was proven right the last three times. This Gym Leader uses…"

Hanny heaved a loud sigh, scuffing her shoes with impatience. "Grass and Poison type Pokémon."

The man was left with his finger in the air. "Oh hey, you must have read her Facebook. But I'm sure that you don't know her weaknesses…"

"Fire, Ice, Poison, Flying and Bug against Grass types, and Ground and Psychic for Poison," Manny rattled off the list without thinking twice. "Do you also want to know what's ineffective against those types, or shall I save that lecture for later?"

The man visibly crumpled into his tacky purple shirt. "Oh fine. Don't bother with useless old me. It's not like I singlehandedly raised three Champions, or anything. I'll be here, waiting for your inevitable victory, O Great Ones," he groused, but stood aside.

"The only things you're capable of raising are eyebrows and blood pressure," Hanny shot back while she entered the Gym proper. Manny followed her.

Mint tarried with the stalker. He cupped his hands over his mouth to whisper.

"Hanny and Manny are really mean. Manny wasn't always that way! I think Hanny's making him worse. We all just got into a lot of trouble with our parents, so just ignore them." He smiled. "You remind me of Dad; he helps Trainers, too, except he dresses better and doesn't smell like desperation!"

The man's countenance brightened. He gave the thumbs-up to Mint, who discretely returned the signal before chasing after his really mean friends.

888

"What is this thing?" Manny demanded of a nearby Gym Trainer. The Centre of the Gym was dominated by a huge circular pit in which lay a gigantic metallic flower with two glossy green leaves big enough to stand on.

"That's our flower clock. When you defeat a Gym Trainer, like me, the 'hands' of the clock change time, so that you may walk over them to the next Trainer."

Hanny raised an eyebrow. "That is the most convoluted and unnecessary puzzle I have ever encountered in my life. Did you people consider a simple corridor lined with Trainers who attack you one after the other?"

The Gym Trainer opened her mouth, shut it again, then scratched her head. "Ummm… Gardenia's kind of weird. But you have to admit, it's pretty, and leaves a good first impression!"

Manny nodded. "Granted, it is a unique puzzle, way more interesting than teleportation devices and far more direct." He sighed. He didn't like playing games in real life... games were for consoles and the Internet. "Okay, I'll bite. You would be the first Trainer, correct?"

"That's right!" the girl said and her smile beamed like sunlight, relieved to be in familiar territory once more. "My Pokémon are the doormats of this Gym!"

A vein twitched on Hannah's forehead. "That's incredibly denigrating to your own Pokémon, but I understand; your lack of confidence will soon be justified. Zeke, go!"

"Oh, fiddlesticks," the Gym Trainer's face fell right to the floor when Hannah's Ponyta flared into existence. "I think Roark breeds Ponyta just to spite us!"

Manny chuckled. "So HE'S responsible for the wild Ponyta north of Oreburgh! Now we know why his own Pokémon are so weak; he's busy counteracting YOURS!"

Zeke, Manny's Ponyta and Mint's Monferno blazed a path through the Gym, the three Trainers hopping across the flower clock after each Gym Trainer.

"I wonder..." Mint said.

"Oh no, Mint is having a thought!" Hanny said, holding up her hands in mock terror.

"…I wonder what our Pokémon think when they're fighting?"

Pokémon have language. Humans just hear them repeating their name. Whenever Manny summoned his Ponyta, she would rear up on her powerful hindlegs, her eyes burning, and declare with a mighty neigh, "I, PONYTA, WILL KNOCK YOU ALL DOWN!" Zeke was nowhere near that villainous and just gave a stoic grunt, wishing his opponent, "Good luck. May the best win!" Mint's Monferno yelled, "FINLAND!" despite the fact that Finland was over 7,500 kilometres away.

They encountered Gardenia at last. She was a pretty redhead decked in green and tan clothing; the colours of the Earth.

"Gardenia, did you really place a curse upon the people of Eterna?" Hanny asked.

Manny snorted. "You don't actually believe that-"

"First of all, good morning, my name is Gardenia, I'm the leader of this gym!" she glared at them. They were nonplussed. She sighed. "Secondly, I didn't do that; Shaymin did. I merely asked for justice, and she delivered. I have been here for hundreds of years, watching over the beautiful plants of my Gym and the forest, waiting for an apology."

She said it in such a calm, matter-of-fact tone that Manny almost believed her.

"You want an apology from the people of Eterna? That's it?" Mint said with perfect incredulity. "They didn't say anything about that!"

Gardenia shrugged. "No, they didn't, because they think that Shaymin's curse is unfair. They are still children, remember?"

Hannah cleared her throat, Zeke's ball already in hand. "I'll talk to them. For now, your Gym badge, please."

"You're just a little girl. Roserade and I have been here before your greatest grandparents were born!"

"Don't patronise me because some vengeful god decided to give you eternal youth. You're just a nasty old woman who holds grudges against LITTLE KIDS!"

"Well, I never! Roserade, go!"

He went, but was knocked down by Zeke's Flame Wheel.

"I can't believe this. Why, after all these centuries, isn't he stronger?"

"Pokémon mirror their Trainers. Your spirit died ages ago, so he hasn't grown stronger since. My spirit is alive and well–"

"That is enough," Manny cut in. "I have had it with these monkey-fighting myths in this Monday-to-Friday Gym! Gardenia, accept my Gym challenge!"

"You'll have to start all over from the entrance, little boy."

Manny put on his best smug face. "Like Hanny, I am going to use one Pokémon, no substitutes. Or are you saying your Roserade can't take on one little boy and his Pokémon?"

Gardenia's face reddened like a rose in full bloom. She fed her Roserade a Max Revive only to have him knocked down by Staravia's Wing Attack. The Gym Leader stomped her foot, her face an even angrier rose red.

"Get out! Get out of my Gym!"

"Wait! It's my turn now!" Mint raised his hand.

"I don't care! Get out!"

Mint tried to put on a smug face, but only managed to leer. "I'll finish Roserade with one attack! If Roserade can survive that, you win!"

Gardenia took a deep breath that shivered her from head to toe in barely suppressed rage.

"One attack!" she shrieked, using another Max Revive spray. "If Roserade still stands, NONE of you get my Gym badge! EVER!"

"We accept!" Mint crowed, punching the air.

"No we DON'T…" Manny and Hanny began to protest, but Mint overrode them with a loud, almost hysterical command: "MONFERNO, use BLAZE KICK!"

"GREAT GOOGLY MOOGLY!" everyone else yelled as Roserade was kicked clear out of the Gym and into low orbit while on fire.

Mint grinned so broadly that his gums showed. "My Monferno's daddy was a Blaziken! Isn't that AWESOME?"

Manny gaped at the hole in the roof. "You mean it knew that move when it was a CHIMCHAR?"

"Uh huh! Pokémon aren't born from spontaneous combustion, ya know! They have Mommies and Daddies just like us!"

"I can't BELIEVE IT!" Gardenia reared back her arm and threw: a Forest Badge smashed into each Trainer's forehead.

"Ow!"

"Ow!"

"Ow!"

"GET. OUT!"

The kids beat an expeditious retreat.

"You know what? I think she was lying about that apology nonsense," Hanny told the two boys. "The Eterna people are really nice! They apologised every time they caught us in their traps in the Underground, remember?"

"Yeah, they must have set me on fire a billion times," Mint giggled self-consciously, "but yeah, they always said sorry afterward."

"I guess we have to find Shaymin, and make her fix this whole mess." Hanny and Mint stared at Manny because he had offered the suggestion. Manny cocked his thumb over his shoulder. "There, are you satisfied? Now can we go to the next city?"

"Yeah we can, except you two need bikes to get there. Let's go to the bike shop down the road," Hanny told them, and walked off without bothering to wait for acknowledgement. They were, after all, her clueless minions.