A/N: Hi! So I have made a decision. I'm gonna end this story with 50 chapters, although chapter 50 will be more of an epilogue. Basically 49 is the last actual chapter... unless you count epilogues as chapters. Then I suppose 50 would be the final chapter. But anyways, there will be a sequel in which John gets his ass handed to him! Yay! No, he didn't die after the helicopter crash. So yeah, after I finish this story I'll start working on the sequel! Does that make anyone happy? Tell me~

P.S.- I apologize for the huge time skip...

One Month Later...

Ghost and Roach entered the room, together as usual. They both looked much better. They had all of their stitches out and their casts off. Finally they could both walk and although it still made them uneasy, one wasn't as worried about the other when he left the room. The nightmares still came, but not nearly as frequently as they had. They were both covered in scars, but that was nothing new. Most importantly they were both happy now.

"Hello bitches!" Roach chirped, sitting down on the couch with Ghost.

Logan raised an eyebrow.

"Why are you so happy?"

"Oh, he's normally like this. Energetic and really perky. Although I suppose none of you have really seen his version of normal yet, have you?" Luke said thoughtfully.

"Nope, every time we've seen him he's been injured." Hesh confirmed.

"Well anyways, he's normally a very happy person. Aren't ya, Roach?" Ghost said with a grin.

"The fuck are you talking about? I'm an ass." He replied bluntly, causing Kick to choke on his drink.

"So... you admit you're an ass?"

"Yup, but it's not a bad thing. At least I'm a sexy ass."

Luke whacked him on the head.

"No, you're a dumb ass."

"Well that was mean." Keegan scoffed.

"It's okay Keegan, he's just jealous."

"Jealous of what? You don't have anything for me to be jealous of."

"I seem to recall you saying he had nice abs..." Archer said with a smirk.

Roach smiled.

"Where was I during this conversation?"

"Knocked out." Logan said.

"Damn it, I always miss the best things when that happens."

"Yeah, like me." Ghost said happily.

"You? Why would I miss you?" Roach teased.

"Cause you love me~"

"I suppose that's true." He admitted.

"Lulu, when's the last time you had a girlfriend?"

Everyone turned to stare at him. Luke facepalmed.

"Who the hell is Lulu?" Price asked.

"That's Luke's nickname. He hates it."

"Then why would you use it?"

"To annoy him! Duh! Why the hell else would I use it?!"

"I swear to god if you call me Lulu again I'm gonna lock you in the tiny closet for an hour." Luke threatened.

Roach paled and immediately shut up. Ghost laughed and hugged him.

"You're so mean to him!" Kick said sympathetically.

"He deserves it. Did you not hear him admit that he was an ass earlier?"

"Oi! I said a sexy ass, get your facts straight!" Roach snapped.

"Prove it." Soap challenged.

"Okay. Luke, what did I skip school all the time to do?"

Luke sighed and asked, "Why do I have to tell them? Can't you?"

"Nope, tell them bitch."

"He... He skipped school all the time to go pick up girls. He was like a fucking rabbit... always screwing girls." He said, shaking his head.

"Yes! It was LEGENDARY!" Roach said proudly.

"You're such a ho." Ghost said with a smile.

"You know, one time he snuck out at night to meet a girl and-"

"NOOO! WE DO NOT SPEAK OF THAT!" Roach yelled, pouncing on him like a tiger on a deer.

"He-"

"You talk too much! Shut your face!" He said, putting a hand on his mouth.

Luke bit him and he yelped and jumped back.

"The girl's father came home and- owww!- and he saw them going at it- stop that!- and Gary ran all the way home in his boxers because the father- quit!- started chucking stuff at him!"

Everyone's mouths fell open. Roach just laid on the floor, looking like he just wanted to melt into it and disappear.

"Oh my god!" Kick said, covering his mouth in surprise.

"Sounds like something that would happen to him." Ghost mumbled with a wolfish smile.

"Luke, I hate you." Roach muttered.

"I hate you too, child."

"Did that really happen?"

"No!" Roach said.

"Yes, it did. He's a liar." Luke stated.

"That was terrible. I had a fucking boner for the rest of the night..."

"Thanks for that information Roach, we really needed to know that." Merrick said flatly.

"Well it's true!"

"You deserved it for sneaking out." Hesh laughed.

"No man deserves to have stuff chucked at him while he's in the middle of trying to fuck a hot girl."

"Mhmm, sure. But now you have a boyfriend." Luke said, pointing at Ghost, who blushed under the attention.

"Yeah, I do. And he's cuuute~" He said, poking Ghost's cheeks.

"Stop ittt..." He said, hiding his face in embarrassment.

"Release your inner rainbow!" Toad said in a girly voice.

"Are you gay too, Toad?" Kick asked curiously.

"Eh, I'm bi." He shrugged.

"I feel like you and Archer are together..." Hesh said suspiciously.

"Nah, just friends." Archer said, munching on his toast.

"Yup."

"Hmmm, okay. Oh, when are you guys gonna head back to your base? You can't live here forever, ya know." Merrick laughed.

"We were thinking tomorrow. We'll drop Luke off too." Price said.

"Oh wait. Is Mark back at your house?" Roach asked.

Luke nodded. "He helped fix you up but you were kinda half-dead, so you must not have noticed him."

"Oops. Well, I wanna see him when we drop you off. Haven't seen him since I left..."

"Yeah, you can talk to him for a while."

"Who's Mark?" Ghost asked, a hint of jealousy edging into his voice.

Roach smiled but hid it by taking a large sip of his coffee.

"He's another friend of Gary's. Those two have known each other since 8th grade, they're very close." Luke explained.

They nodded understanding.

"That's cool. At least my loser has some friends." Ghost commented, ruffling his boyfriend's hair.

Roach pouted and tried to fix his hair.

"I'm not a loser."

"Nope, you're the king of losers." Logan said.

"You guys are mean." He whined.

"You love us though!"

"Nope, I don't love stupid people." He denied.

"You're so rude."

"Yea... but I'm sexy." He said, getting up and doing body rolls out of the room.

They all just stared. They hadn't expected that. Ghost recovered first.

"I don't know if I should be more surprised he can move his hips like that or that he just did body rolls out of a room..."

"Be shocked about both. It'll make him happy." Luke muttered, not surprised in the least.

"Huh..."

"What?"

The room went quiet and Logan was blushing like mad.

"Can... can he move his hips like that cause he's gay?" He asked timidly.

There was more silence, then all at once everyone started laughing.

"Yes... y-yes that's totally why!" Hesh stuttered through giggles.

"Okay, just to clarify something. Being gay does not give you the awesome ability to be sexy. It just highlights the sexiness that's already there." Roach explained, re-entering the room.

"Roach... you can't highlight sexiness." Kick coughed.

"Yes you can. I'm a living example." He said, twirling around like a little ballerina.

"Yeah, but you're also full of shit. That's why your eyes are brown." Soap said, trying not to smile.

"Yup, it's scientifically proven that if your eyes are brown you're full of shit. It's a serious medical condition." Keegan deadpanned.

Roach raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced.

"What's it called then?"

"Shitimonia." Hesh supplied.

Roach laughed, but stopped when Luke punched his arm.

"It's not funny! I've treated it before! People die if they don't get treatment! And you need it immediately from the looks of you."

"...What's that supposed to mean?" He asked, growing pale.

"I'll have to remove your eyes." Luke said, completely straight faced.

Roach's eyes grew to the size of saucers.

"NOOOOO!" He screamed, bolting from the room.

Then they promptly spent the next hour laughing their asses off and crying.

A/N: Lol, Shitimonia... that was great. I'm dying... please review and remember to tell me what you think about me writing a sequel! ;)