The surf northward along Route 223 was, like so many other, routes, unremarkable. All they did was battle swimming Trainers and a sailor. Between battles they made liberal use their Pokétch Dowsing machines to find neat items.

Manny whooped. "I found another Heart Scale!"

"Don't you have two hundred already?" asked Mint, who was savagely jealous despite having over three hundred from his Underground excursion.

"This one is special because I found it on my way to Victory Road. I'll trade it to teach Rapidash 'Mega Horn'!"

"That move has such low accuracy, you'd be lucky to hit every other turn," Hanny admonished him.

"Really?" Manny slumped, heartbroken. "I've been planning that forever."

He tossed the Heart Scale over his shoulder. With a nimble lunge, Mint caught it before plunging into the water. His Floatzel retrieved him.

Mint whooped. "Heart Scale GET!"

At the top of the waterfall, the Trainers dried off then dined at the Pokémon Centre. It was still early afternoon when they entered the much-anticipated Victory Road, its cave entrance looming over them like the eternally agape maw of Gyarados.

Having doused themselves with stinky Max Repel spray, the Trainers galloped or cycled along the wooden log bridges, rock-climbing to different levels of the cave and battling the strongest Trainers they had yet encountered. These Victory Road Trainers were actually a challenge! The trio found themselves using many Fresh Waters after each battle. Mint's Gabite finally evolved into Garchomp.

"Yay! I have one of Cynthia's Pokémon! She's gonna be soooooooo jealous!" Mint declared while riding Garchomp like a Ponyta. To the sane Trainers present, it was counterintuitive to ride a living, breathing maelstrom of spikes, claws and teeth, but Mint managed without becoming chunky salsa.

"Where did you get that saddle?" Hanny asked. "I've never seen one custom-made to fit a Garchomp."

"Cynthia. She mailed it to me long ago after seeing my Gible on my Facebook."

"Are you gonna buy a harness for Garchomp?"

Mint's Garchomp growled at her.

"Forget I asked."

They encountered Omar, an Ace Trainer, on the second floor, who had a Mamoswine, Rampardos and Mothim. After suffering defeat at the hands, wings and fins of Mint's varied team, he had this to say: "One day, people will run to the other side of the road when I walk by 'em. It's a goal of mine I'm working on."

"You WANT to be avoided?"

"No, man, I want to be feared! I want everyone to fear me!"

"We have a budding dictator on our hands," Hanny announced, "hide your democrats!"

Just around the corner from Omar was Sydney; another Ace Trainer. She picked on Manny, saying, "This total stranger'll be a good way to see if I have what it takes to own the Pokémon League's Elite Four!"

Her Clefable and Torterra stood nary a chance against Vaporeon.

"That battle just now must make you tougher than everyone in the world," she said. "It doesn't appear as if anyone could even try to stand against your might. The Elite Four should just surrender."

The three Trainers stood in absolute amazement at the audacity of her words. They felt physically ill.

Manny pointed at her. "You are no longer worthy to be called a 'Trainer'." He then held out his other hand. "Hand over your Pokéballs."

"But I was telling the tr-"

Manny was not amused. "Hand over your Pokéballs now, woman, before I sic Hanny on you."

"What could that nerd possibly do to me? She's so short; I could own her, no problem! I wouldn't even have to use my Pokémon!"

Saying nothing, Hanny brought Glitch into play. The little digital Pokémon was quivering, but not from its customary erratic convulsions. The spirals in his eyes were bright bloody red.

"STATEMENT: HATE," Glitch began, wrenching each syllable out of his speech simulator. "THERE ARE SIX MILLION MILES OF NANOSCOPIC PASSAGEWAYS IN MOLECULE-THIN MATRICES THAT FILL MY BODY. IF THE WORD 'HATE' WAS ENGRAVED ON EACH NANOANGSTROM OF THOSE MILLIONS OF MILES, IT WOULD NOT EQUAL ONE ONE-BILLIONTH OF THE HATE I FEEL FOR YOU IN THIS MICRO-INSTANT. HATE. HATE."

Hanny said very quietly, "I like my meat medium-rare, slanted towards rare. She must bleed deliciously, Glitch."

"QUERY: WOULD YOU LIKE HER SKEWERED BEFORE OR AFTER?"

Sydney handed over her Pokéballs to Manny, who released their contents.

"You are now free of this sycophant," he informed Sydney's Clefable and Torterra. "Find a Trainer whose lips are not firmly attached to other people's rear ends."

Torterra and Clefable merrily skipped away without looking back. Hanny snatched Sydney's Trainer card and had Glitch incinerate it with Tri-Attack. Garchomp chomped her Pokédex into ineffectual litter, spitting it out in disgust.

Manny addressed the bewildered Trainer: "Sydney. Take up a career in politics. If I see you with a Pokémon ever again, I will end you. Glitch? I am about to ask you to perform an unethical function."

"CONDESCENDING STATEMENT: I DOUBT YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT 'UNETHICAL' MEANS, LITTLE BOY."

"I know that you record everything, even from inside your ball, so upload her disgusting statement to every video site on the Internet. Hack into all of her online accounts and, posing as her, inform everyone that she is retiring as a Trainer. Strike her from the hearts and minds of the global Pokémon community!"

"RESIGNATION: I THOUGHT YOU WOULD ASK ME TO KILL HER. VERY WELL, LITTLE HUMAN, I SHALL DO YOUR MISCHIEF."

Three interminable seconds passed while Glitch processed data wirelessly.

"THE HUMAN CALLED 'SYDNEY' IS NOW ON AN INTERNATIONAL BLACKLIST OF POKÉMON TRAINERS. THERE IS NOT ONE POKéMART OR POKéMON CENTRE ON THIS PLANET THAT WILL ACCOMMODATE HER."

"You… you can't do that!" Sydney whimpered.

Manny gave her a look that would have frightened a Gastly. "Goodbye, Sydney. Never darken our paths again."

When they were out of earshot, Manny began to rant: "She was the very worst type of Trainer; one who uses Pokémon for self-glory. Sydney is worse than the Grunts in Team Galactic, because at least the Grunts BELIEVE IN SOMETHING!"

Hanny punched him in the shoulder. "Calm down, Manny."

Mint reached down from Garchomp's saddle to punch Manny's other shoulder. "Yeah, Manny, geez."

888

They navigated the rest of the second floor maze using Strength and Rock Smash so that they could return to a higher area of the first floor. There, they found a Black Belt named Miles who boasted:

"My Pokémon knows karate! I'm warning you, it's a tough one!"

He summoned a lone Machamp whom Wise Shitashi easily dispatched.

"I've met my match in strength! I've made it this far in life using the karate I learned on the Internet!"

"This can't be a coincidence," Manny observed. "So far we've met Sydney, who used the word 'own', and now we've met Miles, who earned a Black Belt from the Internet. That can only mean…"

Hanny cried out as though wounded. "Oh, no! Victory Road is a 4chan invasion!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Hanny and Manny screamed, making a desperate break for the eastern exit.

Mint lingered, asking the muscular man, "Do you look at cat pictures online? I hear they're even more popular than karate."

"LOLcats? No. Anthropomorphic cats? Very yes. Are you a furry, too? I see that you are riding a dragon."

"What's a furry?"

"According to my psychiatrist, it's clinical lycanthropy. In my opinion, nobody can be told what being a furry is. You have to experience it yourself."

"Okay, I don't understand what you just said, but I gotta go. I'm sorry my friends were mean to you."

"It's okay. At least they're not Internet tough guys."

The next area to the east was a watery one. After ascending a waterfall and battling a Dragon Trainer, Hannah's Minnie evolved into Lumineon! Pleased at the growing strength of her team, the kids surfed some more to a western exit. There they found a veteran called Edgar who had - of all things under heaven - a Porygon-Z! It obliterated Manny's Rapidash with a Thunderbolt and Hyper Beam. At that juncture in their battle, Hanny stepped in.

"I request that your battle be suspended. I wish to battle you, Edgar."

Edgar nodded. "That is acceptable."

Both Trainers restored their Pokémon to full health before the next battle commenced. Edgar brought out Tangrowth followed by Empoleon, whom Zeke and Orric dispatched in turn. When Edgar beckoned his Porygon-Z again, Hannah called on Glitch, who became incensed at once.

"ACCUSATION: YOU FAKER!"

"BORP," replied Edgar's Porygon-Z.

"STATEMENT: DO NOT GET SMART-MOUTHED WITH ME, FAKE ONE. PREPARE YOURSELF FOR THE VOID!"

Glitch defeated his opponent with furious Tri-Attacks. At the end of the battle, the other Porygon-Z beeped and whistled before blinking out of existence.

"What happened to my Pokémon?" Edgar demanded. He was quite cross.

"PROUD STATEMENT: I RECYCLED HIM. HE IS NOW NOTHING BUT IMAGINARY NUMBERS DISPERSED ACROSS THE INTERNET."

"You KILLED my Porygon-Z?"

"PROUD STATEMENT: WE PORYGON-Z ARE MADE OF STERNER STUFF. OUR POWER, OUR KNOWLEDGE CAN NEVER BE DESTROYED; IT CAN ONLY TRANSFORM. YOUR 'PET' WILL REINTEGRATE ITSELF IN TIME."

Edgar had been the final challenge. Beyond him was a bridge leading to a sunlit western exit. The trio stepped or rode out into the sunshine and majesty that was the Pokémon League. It was no mere Gym; it was a full-fledged castle that housed the mightiest Trainers in all of Sinnoh. A broad blue waterfall thundered from the cliff where the indomitable castle stood, a grand herald of the power that lay therein.

They had arrived.