Yang considered herself to be a good big sister. Certainly she'd given Ruby her fair share of ribbing over this whole dating-two-girls-at-the-same-time thing, but there might have been just a teeny bit of impressed jealousy behind that. Eventually she'd been as supportive as she could be for her baby sister, who really wasn't a little girl anymore.

How could she not? All she'd ever wanted was for Ruby to be happy. Seeing her at Beacon, blossoming into a confident, courageous team leader, was a joy to behold.

But what was going on right now, however, was not okay in the slightest.

She'd watched her sister, red cloak trailing angrily behind her as she stalked at the head of the three-person entourage, head outside to deliver a well-deserved chiding.

This was not happy Ruby. This was highly irritated, perhaps even upset Ruby. And that simply would not do.

Because when it came right down to it, she had more faith in Blake making her sister happy than Pyrrha. The redhead was a friend, certainly, but Blake was her partner, and she knew her better than just about anyone else save for Ruby herself.

Yang Xiao Long was nothing if not loyal. And so she decided to take it into her own hands to swing things in Blake's favor.

Granted, her current plan wasn't all that effective. It might be called childish, even.

She'd left the cafeteria with a squeezy bottle of ketchup in hand, stalking behind the bench where Pyrrha and Blake sat. She didn't pay too much attention to the actual conversation going on, instead trying to decide where she was going with this.

Should I maybe drench Pyrrha in the ketchup, make her look foolish? No, Ruby would just feel bad for her… Hmm, maybe spill a pool of it and make her slip, show her to be more uncoordinated than Blakey… Ugh, why didn't I think this through better…?

Her ruminations were cut off by the rustling of the bushes next to her. Peering to the side, she noticed Nora creeping forward, something clutched in her hand.

"Nora!" she hissed to the orange-haired girl. "What are you doing?"

Nora glanced over, guiltily, and Yang finally saw what was in her hands.

A squeezy bottle of yellow mustard.

Narrowed lilac eyes locked onto determined turquoise ones. Each girl took a cautious step forward towards the bench and their target, waiting for the other to make a move with their weapon of choice.

o o o

Ruby paced back and forth in front of the bench, irritation radiating from her every fiber.

"I am very disappointed in the two of you," she declared. "What were you thinking?"

"But-"

"Ah-pupupup!" she cut off the protest, hand upraised. She sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose, channeling Weiss so hard that it would not have been a surprise if her hair had spontaneously turned white. "I mean, seriously. What on earth were you two thinking?"

A chagrined Yang sat on the bench next to an equally embarrassed Nora. The both of them were covered in ketchup and mustard.

"I guess we weren't, really," the blonde sighed, staring miserably at the bangs in front of her face as bright yellow mustard dripped down from them and into her lap.

"You're darn tootin', you weren't," Ruby continued.

"Heh," Nora giggled. "She said tootin'."

"And as for you, Miss Valkyrie," Ruby barked suddenly, causing the orange-haired girl to sit upright with a startled eep. "Ren will be hearing about this."

"Nooo," Nora wailed. "Not that! Anything but that!"

"Oh, yes. That." Ruby gave them a tight grin. "Now, can we put this behind us, please? And agree to stay out of our business?"

"But Rubes, I just-" Yang snapped her mouth shut at the glare Ruby sent her way, instead just giving her a tiny nod.

"Yeah, okay," Nora sighed, dreading the scolding she was going to receive from her partner.

"Alright, then," Ruby said cheerfully. "So, hug it out, already!"

Nora gleefully tackled Yang, making sure to rub even more condiments into her hair. "No hard feelings, blondie!" she yelled before racing off.

"Dammit, Nora, I'm gonna get you for that!" Yang hollered as she took off in hot pursuit, giggling all the way.

Ruby shook her head as she headed back into the cafeteria. "And they call me the immature one?" she wondered rhetorically.

A/N: Yeah, Yang meant well, but she really, really didn't think out her plan beforehand. I love writing Ruby be forceful, because you know she'll still look adorable doing it.

So I know I said one post a day… but then I feel guilty because the chapters are so short, and I have so many of them finished already… So then I think, "Self, why don't you change it to post in the evenings?" which sounds like a great plan, until the morning arrives and I convince myself that one more little update wouldn't hurt… Sigh. At this rate I'm gonna need to start cranking out chapters 10 and beyond before I lose my buffer. The next three chapters, however, will start delving into what, approximately, is going on in the minds of these three ladies.

I keep saying this, but it stays relevant to me how incredibly honored I am to have so many of you reading my little slice of relationship crack.

Jefardi: It was indeed a thing. I can't tell if I've rendered you speechless in a good way or a bad way. Hmm…

growlscout: Yep, consider the omakes like alternate endings. Completely non-canon to the story, and often nonsensical.

THB4: Welcome to the insanity! I'm sure Yang has had some influence on Ruby, but consider who her father is as well… And you're not the first to question how close Blake and Pyrrha might get. All will be revealed in due time...

And now, because I just can't seem to help myself, I present to you yet another omake:

"Alright, then," Ruby said cheerfully. "Now, kiss!"

"..."

"Guys? Hey, guys? Oh, come onnn…" Ruby sighed, sipping from her pink lemonade juice box. "Why am I always the spectator here?"

Okay, so maybe I'm the only one besides growlscout who finds these funny. At least I amuse myself.

Stay shiny!