DEDICATED TO: PERFECTPUREBLOOD FOR DOING ME THE MOST AMAZING TRAILER FOR THIS FIC IN THE WHOLE WORLD!!! GO WATCH IT ON YOUTUBE ^^ AND TO NOTWOLF BECAUSE I AM A TERRIBLE READER AND I'M SO SORRY!! AND TO BRIGHT EYES FOR FINISHING EXAMS!!!

Loves to you all!!!

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13th July 1988

No sooner had I finished reading the last word of Lucius' letter, my mother had snatched it out of my hands, scanned it quickly and- face set hard- shoved me promptly out of the house with an order 'Not to return without the boy.'

The front door was slammed shut behind me, leaving me with a frown and a more than slight feeling of bewilderment. With a long, very heartfelt sigh, I thrust my hands deep into my pockets and began to walk- not wanting to apparate directly to Wiltshire without at least some sort of plan of how I was going to handle the situation...

Admittedly, I was relieved that Lucius had extended the invitation first without me having to push in. But, as I read on, I could see that this was a last resort. God knows what had happened to force the obstinate Lucius Malfoy to ask for my help...

I lashed out with my foot to kick a discarded drinks can, propelling it down the lane and into the murky river. He had only been there for a week! If the situation could escalate this severely in less than ten days, what the hell would happen in a month or even more? I couldn't simply be expected to drop everything at a moment's notice when things got out of hand...even Dumbledore wouldn't be able to put up with that. Why couldn't Lucius, for once, just act like an adult and think about what he is doing before everything gets out of hand?

And Draco's last letter had been so positive; so full of hope and determination...I suppose that is where the main problem lay.

Head supported wearily with one hand, quill held loosely in the other, Draco stared blindly down at the text book propped up in front of him. Tired, grey eyes moved slowly from left to right, left to right, reading whatever it was that he had been ordered to read, but not taking in a word of it. Draco was sure that he had read that last paragraph about dittany at least three times before but he couldn't quite remember...

The sun beat down upon the gardens, making everything look brighter, fresher and even more radiant. It shone through the little diamond-paned window- magnified somewhat by the glass- and lit up the small, rounded tower room in which Draco now worked. The boy's sleeves were rolled up passed his elbows and the very top button of his shirt had been undone in an attempt to make the summer heat a tad more bearable. Draco sincerely hoped that he would be able to hear his father approaching to give him sufficient time to fix his appearance before he was caught.

The boy watched as two peacocks ran around the ornamental fountain- one chasing the other and playfully trying to snap its tail- before they both flapped into the cascading water to cool off, wings splashing, feathers dripping. 'It must get terribly hot,' thought Draco absently as he looked down upon them, 'having feathers...'

With a long sigh of discontentment, Draco turned his attention away from the birds and back to the chapter that he was supposed to be writing about. He pulled the sheet of parchment that he had been making notes on towards him and read them over with a frown. They made even less sense than the book did. Draco threw them down in disgust and slumped down in his seat with a moan of frustration.

He didn't understand what he was supposed to be writing about, he couldn't write about something if he didn't know what it was because it would, inevitably, be wrong and if he wrote about the wrong thing or nothing at all, he would be beaten. Again.

Draco's father had barely spoken a word to him since he had told Draco that he was worth only what the name of Malfoy stood for. Instead, Lucius had decided that actions do, in fact, speak louder than words and it was more effective and less time consuming to use the belt to make Draco shut up and do what he was told rather than actually bothering to argue with him. A very nasty bruise, which ran from just above the boy's ear down to his chin, was the result of the most recent disagreement between father and son. Luckily, Draco had, thus far, been able to keep the promise had had made to himself to be strong and not to cry in front of his father because the mere threat of his father's belt scared him enough that he unable to breathe, much less cry.

With that thought, Draco hurriedly dipped his pen into the small bottle of ink he had been provided with and began to write quickly- unsure, really, of what he was trying to say but anything was better than nothing and it would all lead to the same end anyway, so what did it matter?

It would all end the same...Draco bit his lip painfully and stared hard at the paper in front of him in an attempt to keep himself under control. But it hurt too much and a tear rolled down the boy's nose and splashed onto his work; spreading quickly and smudging the ink. Ruining what little had been done. This small setback proved too much for Draco's already fragile state and, now that one tear had fallen, the rest came quickly and easily and soon not one word of Draco's work could be read.

Lucius was in no mood for pleasantries when I arrived. He scowled as I entered the drawing-room; his pale face set with frustration and as taut and immovable as a rock. There would be no room for any sort of compromise today, I realised- heart sinking- I would just have to do my best with the small amount of latitude I was granted. I was also aware that, were I to disagree with Lucius when he was in this sort of mood, I would- undoubtedly- come out of it with a sufficiently shorter life expectancy.

"So, uh...what's wrong?" I began. The tension in the Manor was stifling and I could feel my chest tightening as it infected me like a cold. "What do you want me to do?"

"I want you to sort out your blasted godson!" Lucius snapped, striding out of the room with an indication for me to follow. "He is completely out of control; he is wilful, disrespectful and downright unbearable!" He rounded on me suddenly, eyes blazing. "You made him like this, you changed him and now you can bloody well change him back again otherwise, Merlin help me, I will do something drastic and it will be all your fault! And I will make sure that Draco knows it, too!"

I wanted to shout at him- 'How can you be so callous?'- I wanted to hurt him like he hurt everyone else...but I didn't. There's no point. Instead, I kept my mouth shut and followed behind my 'friend' as he lead me through the labyrinth of passage ways that was Malfoy Manor- many of which I had never come across before, despite the amount of time that I had spent there.

After walking in silence for, what felt like, a thousand miles, we came to a small door with a brass handle. Lucius produced a key from his trouser pocket, unlocked the door easily with a sharp turn of his wrist, and then pushed it open to allow me inside.

"You lock him in?" I asked with a frown, stepping inside.

Lucius shrugged. "It is necessary. You'll find him up those stairs over there," he pointed to a small flight of wooden steps which curled around the circular tower room and finished by another door- three or four metres above our heads. "An hour, Severus. You have an hour."

Draco's head snapped up as he heard the stairs creak beneath the weight of someone's feet and looked down- horrified- at the essay he was supposed to be writing...supposed to have finished! Even if it had been legible, he had still only written six inches and that would never be considered enough! Mind going into overdrive, Draco snatched up his pen and began scrawling nonsense. Maybe if his father saw that he was trying hard, he wouldn't get so mad...

Draco's fingers dragged the quill automatically across the page as hundreds of excuses presented themselves, each as useless as the next.

Straightening his back and taking a deep breath, the boy composed himself and waited- expressionless- for the sound of his father coming in.

Apart from being round and having considerably more space, Draco's new rooms looked basically the same as the old ones had been; the downstairs part was taken up with an old-looking arm chair, a small glass topped table and several bookshelves- evidently made especially to fit against the curved stone walls. The small space that wasn't taken up with books had been fitted with an ornate fireplace which had been ornately carved from some sort of black stone. Because there were no windows, brackets filled with enchanted fire were dispersed evenly and filled the little room with war, orange light.

Upstairs was much the same as Draco's old bedroom had been; an insanely immense four-poster bed dominated the majority of the space and an ancient oak wardrobe took up much of the rest. A large bay window, hung with deep-red velvet, overlooked the northern part of the Malfoy garden and it was in this recess that Draco was seated- his back to me- at a small writing desk.

I watched him silently from the doorway- pretending for a moment that nothing had changed- nothing had gone wrong- and that he was still my student. I missed our routine and how simple everything had been back then. Relatively speaking, of course. I missed it more than I would ever admit, but- be it for pride or practicality- I would never come back.

Stepping carefully across the carpeted floor, I moved over to where Draco was working, still, apparently, oblivious to my presence, and stood behind him. Reaching slowly out with one hand, I placed it on my godson's shoulder.

No sooner had I touched him than Draco started violently, knocking the desk and upsetting a bottle of ink all over his work. Panicking, he jumped to his feet and desperately tried to rectify the situation by moving everything out of the way of the spreading ink. "Sorry sorry..." he kept repeating; head bowed, shoulders hunched as his hands moved frantically.

"Draco-"

"Please, I'd done it! Really I had! Father, I'm sorry..."

"Draco, it's okay! It's just me!"

Draco turned around- an ink stained sheet of parchment clutched tightly in equally stained hands- and eyed me doubtfully. He was not in as bad a way as I had feared; despite the bruises, he stood up straight, his eyes were bright and alert and his expression was fierce. He had not been broken yet.

Then, all at once, a grin spread across Draco's face, he burst into tears and flung his skinny arms around my waist. "You're here! You're here! Why didn't you come sooner? Why didn't you come when I wanted you?"

"Forgive me," I murmured, resting a hand on his head and running my fingers through white-blonde hair. "I wanted to wait until things had settled down. Your letter was so positive, I hadn't realised that things had become so difficult between you and your father."

"But you're here now." Draco took a step back and looked up at me- smiling broadly through his tears. "Just like you promised. Are we going to go back to your house? Or Hogwarts? Where are we going Sir?"

I frowned, not understanding. "What do you mean, Draco?"

"I mean, you're going to take me, aren't you? We're going to go somewhere, right?" Grey eyes looked at me anxiously and the smile flickered. "Unless you're coming back..."

I studied my godson carefully; wondering where on earth this was coming from. I had never said anything that would give him the impression that I was going to take him away again, but the expectancy and the hope in Draco's expression told a very different story.

Sighing, I held out a hand to him. "Come," I said as he took it wordlessly. "I think you and I need to talk."

"So are you?" Draco asked excitedly, clambering up into my lap as I sat down in the armchair by the fireplace. "Coming back, I mean. Have you changed your mind about Hogwarts?"

I shook my head slowly. "No, I'm still going."

"Oh..." my godson shifted slightly, cocking his head to one side and regarding me curiously. "So, where am I going, then? Am I going to Hogwarts too?"

"Draco..." I could hardly bear to even look at him, I felt that bad, "I'm sorry Dragon, I really don't know where you're getting all this from, but I'm afraid that you're not going anywhere. Your father wanted me to talk to you, he said that...he said that you are out of control and I needed to talk some sense into you otherwise..." my words trailed hopelessly off as Draco stared at me despondently. I put out a hand to touch him, to apologise, but he just shrugged me off and turned his face away.

"Don't be angry," I almost pleaded, taking one of his hands in my own. "If there was anything-"

"You could do, you'd do it, I know," finished Draco with a sigh, pulling his hand away. "I used to think," said Draco softly after a short silence, "that you weren't afraid of Father. That you didn't mind standing up to him. But it's scary, isn't it?" Grey eyes flicked up with a glimmer of apprehension. "Standing up to Father, I mean. I hadn't realised how bad it would make things...I thought it would help..." a small hand brushed tentatively against the stark bruise that ran down his jaw then, with a small shiver, Draco sat back; head resting against my chest, hands holding tightly to my shirt. "You said it would help, Sir."

"But I hadn't realised that you would take it so far." I wrapped my arms around Draco's small body and hugged him. "There is a difference, Draco, albeit a slight one, between being brave and being foolish. It is good that you are trying to stick up for yourself," I assured him as the boy turned his face up to glare at me. "However, it is stupid to bait him for the sake of it and you will only end up getting hurt needlessly. Draco, I will put this bluntly; I do not wish to see you dead. Your father is stubborn and dangerous and you will break before he does, do you understand me?"

Draco said nothing- silenced and stunned by what I had said.

"You're an intelligent boy, you know how to survive," I continued gently. "Be strong, be brave, but do not give him reason to hurt you and I'm sure you'll be fine. What about your mother? Is she getting better?"

"I haven't seen her since she took me away," Draco replied quietly, fingers toying with a loose button on my shirt. "I think she's still sulking and Father's angry at her anyway for not looking after me properly and we came home."

I made a disparaging noise in the back of my throat. "She promised that she would watch out for you," I muttered. "Of her own accord too..."

But Draco simply shrugged. "I don't care. She never bothered before and she would only complicate things. She would only get into trouble with Father and blame me for that."

The bleak, matter-of-fact way in which he spoke saddened me; no eight year old should even be able to talk that way. But, at the same time, he was right. Narcissa was far too self-absorbed to ever really make a positive difference to her son's abysmal situation. Draco was probably better off without her.

We sat for several minutes in silence, content with each other's company and no need to speak. The clock which hung on the opposite wall ticked away the seconds loudly and quickly, reminding me of what little time I had left. There was so much more that I needed to say, but I would rather that I left things unsaid than disturb our mutual peace.

"How long're you staying for?" Draco murmured suddenly, turning his face upwards expectantly. "Will you stay 'til you go to Hogwarts?"

"I would..." I answered carefully. "But your father is not in the best of moods and he will only put up with me for an hour."

"An hour?" repeated Draco, aghast, twisting around to sit up. "But...but that's nothing! Why would you only come for an hour? Why would you do that?"

Without thinking, I blurted out, "It wasn't my idea! Your father sent for me because he said you were out of control and that I had to talk you out of it. He is furious, Draco. I'm not sure that I have ever seen him this upset before. There was absolutely no point in arguing with him because, more likely than not, I probably wouldn't have got even an hour."

"You mean he asked you to come?" Draco's expression was suddenly hard. "Would you not have bothered otherwise? Are you only here because he told you to?"

"You know perfectly well that isn't the case," I told him sternly, recognising the annoyingly familiar expression of bitterness at my apparent treachery. Something that I would never grow accustomed to. "I told you- I promised you that I would come, didn't I?" Draco scowled. "True, if I had been left to my own devices, it would probably have been left a while longer," I continued firmly, "but only because I wanted you to try and settle back down and get along without needing me."

"But I do," Draco said simply, looking at me as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. "You know that. I don't have anyone but you."

I said nothing. What could I say? As much as I disliked the thought of being depended upon by somebody, anybody, I couldn't just leave him to fend for himself. As much as I wanted to concentrate on my own life, I found it difficult to remember just how young Draco actually was and that he did genuinely need me. I could never resent him for that, despite all my complaining. I was, in short, the best of a very bad bunch.

Smiling sadly, I stroked Draco's cheek with the back of my hand, careful not to touch the bruise. "I wish that I could do better," I murmured sincerely. "I wish that I could do right by you."

Draco gave a small sigh and looked away. "Mmm..." Then, cautiously, "How much time's left?"

My eyes flicked briefly up to the clock, which smirked at me. "Not long," I whispered as Draco laid his head on my shoulder. "A few minutes maybe."

As is often the case with people such as myself who possess a particularly small amount of fortune, bad luck was on my side as Lucius chose that very moment to wrench the door open and march in, barking, "Time's up!" His temper had not lessened in the slightest, it seemed, as he still wore the same expression of wild, barely controlled fury as he had when I had arrived. "Well," the elder Malfoy snapped, directing his stormy eyes at me. "Have you done it?" Then, even sharper, to Draco, "Have you decided to behave yourself now?"

For a moment, Draco looked stoically up at his father, saying nothing, and I was afraid that Malfoy pride would overcome sense... but, to my unreserved relief, Draco bowed his head and nodded. "Yes Father."

A triumphant smirk marred Lucius' haughty features. "Good...I presume then, that you have finished your work, considering you're turning over the proverbial leaf?"

Draco's head flashed up, horrified. "W-what?"

"I said," Lucius repeated patronisingly slowly, "I assume you have finished the work I set for you to do because it would be a shame to spoil things so soon, wouldn't it?"

Shifting unhappily, Draco bit his lip and glanced briefly over to me, begging for help. I rose, angry, and opened my mouth to protest, but Lucius cut me off with a curt, "Well, bring me what you have done, if anything, and then I'll make a judgement. Go!" With a quick, frightened glance at me, Draco stumbled up the steps to his room. When he had gone, Lucius turned pleasantly to me. "Thank you, Severus, you can go now."

"Don't be ridiculous!" I snapped back, scowling. "You are being completely unreasonable. Draco has promised to behave and you are still-"

"Still what?" Everything from Lucius' voice to his expression challenged me. "I have a job to do, Severus. And, in case you don't remember, the only reason I am doing it, is because you were inadequate. Forgive me for wanting the best for my son and for not shirking my duties." He sneered and said calmly, "If you truly wanted what was best for Draco, you would understand that I am right."

"What--?" I could scarcely believe what I was hearing; the arrogant sonofagoblin was actually blaming me!

"This is not up for discussion," he informed me, turning his back. "Leave my house, please."

I shook my head wearily, sadly. I had already outstayed my welcome and I knew that, were I to push my luck further, it would only incense Lucius further. "Fine," I said placidly. "But let me say goodbye to Draco first. I owe him that, at least."

Lucius, turned, grey eyes narrowed, then nodded curtly, with a warning, "But if Draco isn't down here in three minutes, there will be consequences." 'And the guilt will punish you as much as him,' he finished silently.

Draco was standing by his desk, gazing out the window when I got upstairs. Sunlight made the white in his hair gleam and illuminated his pale face with an almost ethereal quality.

I stepped in tentatively. "Draco, I have to leave now...." The boy neither moved nor spoke, or showed any sign at all that he had heard me. "Draco-"

"So go then." Clear and emotionless, my godson spoke languidly.

"What?"

"If you're gonna go," Draco turned, expression blank. In his hands, he clutched the parchment that he had been working on- black and spoiled by ink. "Why don't you just go?"

I regarded him, frowning- trying to ascertain whether or not he was being serious. "Do you want me to?" I asked slowly.

"Does it matter?" Draco snapped back instantly. "As Father said, when has what I want ever been taken into account?" I could see the hurt and the anger rising like a great wave, building and building before crashing down and destroying everything. "You're always making out like you care and want to help and such but when it comes down to it you won't! You're just the same as everyone else!"

I stared hopelessly down at my godson- what he said was right, in a way, but at the same time it wasn't like that at all...but I could I even hope to make him understand?

"Draco, I can't-"

"Why can't you?" Draco cried passionately. "You're an adult, you can do anything if you want to! You're just pretending to care 'cause it makes you feel good but you don't really. You don't care! 'Least...not like you say you do." His grey eyes- suddenly so much like his father's- flashed up sharply. "You're a liar. Or, if you really do mean it, you're a coward!"

The word, that word, made me flinch. Before I had thought about what I was doing, I grabbed hold of Draco's shoulders and shook him hard. "Don't you dare," I snarled furiously, "Don't you dare ever say that to me again! Do you understand me?" He stared up at me- wide eyed, silent. "Draco!"

I felt him cringe and recoil beneath my touch as I shouted at him. "Then...then why won't you help me?" he whispered, voice wobbling. "I-if you weren't...you would try. Please....!" Draco whimpered as I gripped him a fraction harder, tears gathering in the corners of his eyes.

"Now listen to me," I said quietly, not releasing my hold. "I have said, many times, that if there was something that I could do that I felt would benefit you in any way at all, I would do it. However, it would be illegal, Draco, for me to do something drastic against your father's wishes. If I were to take you away now, I could be arrested for kidnap! Is that what you want? Is that what you're asking me to do?"

"But they wouldn't!" Draco yelled back. "If you told them, they'd understand, I know they would! You're just making excuses 'cause you don't want to help! You don't care what happens to me! You don't care what Father does or what he says to me!" Draco's high-pitched voice bordered on the edge of hysteria and thick with tears as he shouted at me. "I bet you wouldn't help even if he was gonna kill me 'cause it would mean having to not go to your stupid Hogwarts! Well maybe I don't care neither!"

With a sudden burst of strength, Draco managed to tear away from me and stood, quivering with anger and stiff with fear, a few metres away out of my reach.

As I am sure I have said many times before, dealing with an emotionally unstable (for want of a better phrase) Draco is like dealing with a very wild, very fierce feline. I didn't particularly want to approach him, for fear of either him running away or my being bitten.

"I don't care neither!" Draco continued to shriek. "I don't care if you go away forever and leave me here 'cause I won't stay! I won't! If-if Father doesn't kill me, I will! I-I swear I will! And then...and then it'll be good 'cause then you can do your job like you wanted and Father and Mother won't have to bother anymore 'cause I'll be...'cause I'll be..." But it was impossible for Draco to finish. The actual meaning of what he was saying stuck the little boy suddenly. He sat down with a bump, wrapped his arms tightly around his knees and burst into tears. "I-I don't want to...d-d-die!" he sobbed.

Taking advantage of Draco's subdued temper, I crouched down and wrapped my arms around him. "You aren't going to die," I murmured, resting my chin lightly on the crown of his head. "Being melodramatic isn't going to do much good. I was only exaggerating when I said that I didn't want to see you dead, your father isn't going to kill you."

"Didn't you hear what I said?" Draco turned his tear-stained face up towards me. His eyes searched mine, as though trying to make me understand. "I will. I can't stay here, I can't! And if you don't take me away, I'll k-k-kill myself! I swear it, Sir!"

A/N: I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry!!!!!!!! This has been an outrageous delay and there is no excuse for it :S AllI can say is that I have succumbed to face book, boys are suddenly rather important and I have two jobs that I don't want but can't decide between- ie. checkout girl in Woolworths and waitressing... I have never been so damned busy in my entire life!!! I wrote most of this weeks and weeks ago and then just...sort of stopped ¬¬ But anyway, you have my undying pledge that I will never give up my fics no matter how busy I get :)

I was going to try and finish by yesterday, considering it was the 21st and The Day That HBP Almost Came Out ¬¬ I actually cried :'( My condolences to everyone- we united in our HP grief. BUT Epic trailer came out on mugglenet las week and it is AMAZING so go type HBP trailer 3 into youtube if you haven't seen it already!!!

And welcome new readers from youtube, thankyou so much for taking the time to catch up :D

Love and Galaxy Chocolate to all!!

Lily M xxxxx