"I need you to tell me the truth." Maura Isles couldn't believe her attempts to get a straightforward answer from her friend…or whatever she was…forced Maura to actually corner her in Maura's very small, neat, organized office.
Jane Rizzoli's eyes darted around, looking for a way out. Unless she suddenly learned to teleport, there wasn't one. She needed space, she needed air, she needed to be anyplace that wasn't here. This was way past flirting, over the shifting line they kept redrawing at the border of their friendship.
"Will you?"
Jane nodded.
Jane had yet to look at her, but Maura continued. She was out of patience with their situation and tired of puzzling over it. "How do you feel about me?"
Oh, that was a topic best tackled after many beers, and maybe a couple shots. Because what she felt and what she was willing to own up to were completely different, and that was as much self-examination as Jane was willing to do sober. "You're my best friend."
"That's not an answer." Maura needed specifics. Her mind needed facts to analyze, or in this case, an admission which would probably not be forthcoming now.
Jane gave mental thanks to Frost for calling. Hopefully, he had some news about a case. She smiled weakly at her friend and pulled out her phone.
It was promptly removed from her hand and turned off. "We're having a discussion."
"That could be important."
"Frost can wait a few minutes."
"Maura, can we please not do this now?"
"When are we going to talk, Jane? You've been avoiding me since we went undercover."
Jane ducked her head more to keep Maura from seeing her face and analyzing what she was thinking, since Maura hit on exactly the reason Jane was running for cover.
"Well?" Maura demanded impatiently.
The door to the autopsy suite opened, and Jane looked to see who was there. Frost. 'Excellent.'
"I don't care who's out there. You're not leaving until I get a definitive answer from you."
"Tonight, ok?"
"Nice try, since we're scheduled for dinner with your family."
"After dinner. Your place."
Maura wasn't happy, but it was better than nothing. "Fine," she snapped.
"I'll pick you up around six." If she drove, and if they talked at Maura's, she could leave if she had to.
Frost rapped on the closed door. Jane held up her index finger and he nodded.
"I have to go, Maura."
She hated those words, but stepped aside.
After she and Frost finished interviewing the witness, Jane raced home. She had enough time to walk and feed the dog before she had to leave to get Maura. Joe Friday, at least, was happy to see her, and she drew out their walk as long as she could.
At 6:05 p.m., she knocked on Maura's door. Half a minute later, Maura opened it. She had her purse and two other small bags in one hand, but didn't give anything when Jane offered.
Dinner, as always, was delicious, and the bags contained dessert. Jane and Frankie were assigned dish duty while the others went to the living room. They played rock-paper-scissors to determine who washed and who dried the dishes, and went to work.
Frankie cleared the last few things from the table while Jane filled the basin. They worked quietly for a while.
"You feelin' all right?" Frankie asked.
"Yeah. Why?"
"You're too quiet. Fight with Maura?"
"Sorta."
"Whose fault?"
"Whose is it ever?" she sighed, and rinsed another plate.
"Well, you better fix it, 'cause Ma's in there gettin' her side."
"Crap."
Frankie laughed. "Crap? Man, you are so whipped."
"Shut up!" She smacked the back of his head, leaving suds behind.
He kept laughing, and Jane ignored him. She fumed at the dishwater. Frankie wasn't helping. She so did not want to have the discussion Maura was forcing, but she didn't want to lose her friend, either, and she never had a relationship of any kind last more than six months after sex was involved. There was no way she could win.
"Oh, c'mon, it's kinda funny."
"So glad you're amused by my pain." Jane rinsed the last handful of cutlery and dropped it in the drainer. "You can finish the rest on your own." She left the kitchen and went to the living room.
Jane and her mother were sitting beside each other on the couch, talking softly. She sat next to Maura and looked at the television. How did she really feel about Maura? They certainly had chemistry, and Maura was beautiful, but there had to be more than that. Since there obviously was, would it be enough? Jane was well aware of her own shortfalls as a romantic partner, and hadn't even attempted to seriously date since Hoyt. She stopped on his name, unwilling to go further than that acknowledgement.
That was the crux of it: He promised he would return for her, and she didn't want to be responsible for getting someone else hurt or killed, especially anyone she cared about. Anyone she dated was immediately in his sights. It was the reason she kept her visits to her family to a minimum, the reason her social life was limited to after work drinks or work-related events.
Maura nudged her. "Ready to go?"
"Sure. Thanks, Ma, dinner was good." Jane got up and kissed her father's cheek. "Bye, Pop."
Jane turned on the radio in the car so they didn't talk. When they got to Maura's, Maura pointed her toward the couch, and joined her a few minutes later with water for both of them.
"I suppose you want me to begin," Maura said.
Jane nodded.
"We've been dating for months. Are you just not interested?" Maura asked bluntly.
"I'm interested." Jane told the truth; Maura would know if she lied.
"You have a strange way of showing it."
"What do you want from me?"
"I want a real relationship."
"We have a great friendship."
"It's lovely, and I want more."
"I can't."
"You won't."
"Fine, I won't."
"Why?"
Jane hated saying his name, hated acknowledging him at all, but her hands unconsciously came together. "Hoyt."
"He's in jail. They're not going to let him out."
"He'll be back," Jane answered grimly. "And I don't want you anywhere near me when he is."
"I'm not afraid of him."
"You should be."
"Because you are?"
"It's one reason." Jane looked at her hands, twisting against each other.
Maura moved close enough to put her hand on top of Jane's, stilling them. "You can't let him run your life."
"If something happened to you, I don't know what I'd do," Jane whispered.
"Nothing's going to happen." Maura put her other hand under Jane's chin and raised her head. "You won't let it."
"You don't know what he" Jane began hoarsely.
"Where is he?" Maura interrupted.
"Huh? Jail."
"Where are you?"
"Here."
"You beat him. You did your job, and he lost." Maura stressed he last two words. "All he can do is talk, because you won."
No one put it in those terms before. They all acted like she did something wrong, but grudgingly respected her for surviving it, even her family. Maura was the first person to believe in her, and that tipped the balance. Not sure what to say, and knowing what Maura wanted, she kissed Maura. It was awkward at first, but still wonderful, and improving each second as Maura pushed them down on the couch so she was atop Jane.
"You're mine, not his," Maura said, and kissed Jane again.
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