As promised, another update for the day!
Okay, so this will be really really different from the show (I honestly think I kind of changed the characters'...characters, like their wants and priorities whatever) but this is pre-AOS anyway. Coulson will be Coulson and May will be May in no time!
That weekend, the couple stays in their apartment. Melinda set up movies they hope they can get through binge watching before they start having sex, and Phil is in the kitchen, making breakfast for the two of them. Melinda puts down the VHS in her hands and looks at the kitchen where she sees Phil moving around the kitchen with a small smile on his face. Melinda smiles and stands up and approaches Phil in the kitchen.
"You know you can always at least let me cook breakfast for once." she says, leaning against the kitchen doorframe and crossing her arms over her chest. Phil looks at her and chuckles.
"I wouldn't want our apartment to burn down just after two months of living here, honey." he jokes, winking at Melinda. She scoffs and rolls her eyes at him.
"Hey, I can cook. You taught me." she defends. Phil turns the stove on as the sound of frying bacon fills the room and immediately, so does the aroma of bacon. Melinda tries her best to hide her satisfaction with the smell of bacon.
"Remember how that went?" Phil asks. Melinda raises her eyebrows and made a soundless 'oh' with her lips.
It was their last semestral break in the Academy, and the couple had decided to visit Melinda's mom for the break. While Lian was out, the couple decided to make lunch, with Melinda volunteering to cook for her mother, asking Phil to help her. It was just a simple Chinese food recipe. Melinda's mother had brought out the recipe before she had left. However, they ended up ordering Chinese takeout instead, because they had to clean up the burnt rice Melinda had made.
"Well, okay, that was once." Melinda tells him, raising an eyebrow, and she hums at the strong smell of bacon filling the whole apartment. Phil smiles smugly.
"Mel, that was the only time I let you try cooking," Phil says, turning the stove off and putting the bacon on a bigger plate on the dining table. "You're better off the kitchen."
Melinda huffs and slumps further in the doorframe. Phil looks at her and gives her a smile. He approaches her and wraps his arms around her waist to give her a kiss on the lips, to which Melinda could not resist returning as she wraps her arms around his body.
"If we'd be in S.H.I.E.L.D., you know you'd be better on the field than I am." Phil tells her. Melinda smiles and rests her head on her chest.
"If we'd be in S.H.I.E.L.D., Phil." Melinda emphasises. Phil runs his hand up and down her back and presses a kiss on top of her head.
They had never really talked about S.H.I.E.L.D. before, nor the possibility of them ever coming back to work for the organisation. It's too risky for them, and they have to abandon their apartment, their respective occupations which they both love, their chance to have a normal family life, and most of all, they have to abandon their romantic relationship, as S.H.I.E.L.D. does not tolerate such.
The possibility had never really crossed their minds until now. Melinda would be very great out in the field, taking down enemies with her bare hands, without really needing the use of arms. Phil would be a very great team leader, forming strategies to follow in missions and giving overviews and briefings to agents and specialists like Melinda. Besides, the two were S.H.I.E.L.D. Academy's pride, especially in the Operations Department. They had finished off as top people of their batch, which was why it came as a shock to everyone when they announced that neither of them will be joining S.H.I.E.L.D.
For now.
They both wanted a shot of a normal life. Phil wanted a family, a normal one. Melinda wanted a life she could have lived had her mom not been an agent of C.I.A. This was their chance, and they were willing to give it a shot, no matter what it takes.
The couple pulls back from their embrace. "Breakfast?" Phil asks, gesturing the ready dining table, and smiling nervously at Melinda. Melinda looks at him intently. She takes a seat in front of him and starts nibbling on her food and drinking her tea. She observes Phil, he is looking and watching at her as well.
"There something wrong?" Melinda asks, her voice hinting worry and fear. Phil sighs and sets his fork down on his plate, his eyes not meeting hers.
"I know we haven't really talked about this," Phil starts. Melinda swallows, she knows where this conversation is heading and she is, for some reason, afraid of it. "And I know this was clear to us back then when we said we'd take the chance to have a normal life but…" his voice trails off, and he looks at her straight in the eyes. "Have you ever considered going back to S.H.I.E.L.D.?"
Melinda holds her breath and looks down at her plate. She opens her mouth to answer, but she has no answer. She wanted this normal life so badly, she really did. She wants to settle down, get married, have kids, have a normal and typical job, and live her life like everybody. Yet there's this longing to work for the organisation so bad. I mean, she thinks, that's the reason I went to the Academy, right?
She looks up and meets Phil's eyes. He is worried. She bites her bottom lip and sighs. "Have you?" she asks him. He sighs and shakes his head. She feels her world crashing down. If she tells him the truth, this relationship might go anywhere but right.
But it's better than telling a lie, leaving her not able to sleep for nights.
"I may consider it as an option," she mutters. Phil's eyes widen for a moment as he slumps down further in his chair. "I mean, maybe. Maybe yes, maybe no. I don't know, Phil. It's all hypothetical."
"You're gonna have to leave me for it," he says softly, not meeting her eyes. "Will you do it?"
"No." Her answer is firm, and loud enough for him to hear it. "If for you, joining the organisation will have either me to leave you, no."
"You'd have to abandon this normal life if you do want to join S.H.I.E.L.D., Mel," he explains, meeting her eyes finally and straightening his posture. "Everything we've planned out before leaving the Academy—"
"Has it ever crossed your mind that maybe the reason why we were at the S.H.I.E.L.D. Academy is so that we can actually work for S.H.I.E.L.D.?" she asks a little too loudly, her arms crossing over her chest, and her lips pursed. Phil wears a serious expression on his face, and all hints of worry and nervousness are off the atmosphere.
"We chose not to, Melinda," he says. There it is, her full name. She knows that she's reaching the border of his temper once he uses her full name, but she's not willing to give up just yet. "You said you wanted to have a normal life, a life you could have had if your mother wasn't in the C.I.A. and you were willing to give it a shot for your kids to maybe have a normal life in a normal world where their mother will always be there for her, unlike yours."
Her eyes soften as she looks down and swallows a big lump in her throat. Phil's hardened expression had softened when he realised what he had just said. It had always been a sensitive topic for Melinda: her family. She had never lived a normal life like all the other kids and was always raised to be a spy like her mother. She never wanted that growing up. Her mother wasn't always there for her, especially after her parents' divorce. She was always alone, always trained to survive alone. She never wanted to be alone.
Phil never meant to say it. He never did. He knew it would just Melinda. Maybe she could be different than Lian. Maybe while working for the organisation, she could still come home and be there for him, for their kids. It was a small possibility, but Melinda could always turn a small possibility into a reality. She could always try. They could always try.
"Mel, I—" Phil starts softly but Melinda cut him off.
"No, Phil, you're right." she says, not meeting his eyes. Phil's eyebrows knit together and looks down.
"I'm sorry. I…I shouldn't have…" he trails off. Melinda sighs and stands up. Phil's eyes follow her every move.
"I…I'll be back." Melinda says, grabbing her coat and exiting the door. Phil sighs and bangs his balled fist against the table in frustration.
Tell me what you think!