A/N: Is it happy new year in your place yet? Nonetheless, Happy New Year to you, guys!

Melinda still complies with the protocol Stoner had given her months ago: a year of laying off of field work assignments and missions. She still has three months to spare before she goes back to work, and the solitude of her apartment has been her only company, apart from the visitors she has in her apartment on some days.

Maria had visited her on her first day of leave that month, and it was a surprising visit, if Melinda had to be honest. She had told Melinda that Nick Fury, who had worked alongside his predecessor, is the new S.H.I.E.L.D. director and that Maria is Fury's new deputy which came as a shock for everyone who was expecting Romanoff to be Fury's deputy. However, Fury revealed that he had better plans for Romanoff, which is the reason why he chose Maria instead. She also had offered Melinda her sympathy, and knew how it felt to lose someone they love, but Melinda was determined that she would find her baby, so she isn't losing anyone. Maria sighed at her response.

"Nobody knows what's in Stoner's head other than Stoner," she had told Melinda. "You know the guy, he takes what he wants and leaves no trail of it."

"There's always a trail of everything, Maria," Melinda, on the other hand, had replied. "Even someone like him can leave at least a tiny bit of trail."

Maria came back a week later telling Melinda of a story of a whole village killed in the Hunan province in China. S.H.I.E.L.D., supervised by Stoner himself, had covered a mission there the week before Maria had told her the story, and it's to recover an 0-8-4 from Hydra's hands. Whatever the 0-8-4 was, Maria believed it to be dangerous yet valuable, most especially it being the reason why a whole village was killed because they were trying to protect the 0-8-4. The agent responsible for recovering the 0-8-4, Agent Linda Avery, was killed in action, and his partner, Richard Lumley, had gone off the radar, both not recovering the 0-8-4, whatever it was.

Melinda didn't know why Maria had told her about the mission. She thought perhaps it would help keep Melinda up to date with S.H.I.E.L.D.'s biggest missions, or just for the sake of telling something to drive Melinda away from the thoughts of her missing child. She did not expect it, however, when Maria showed her a redacted document of the incident, with only the date of Melinda's daughter's birth is shown on the page, uncensored.

"This was Stoner's last mission before he disappeared from the radar," Maria had explained to her. "He was there in Hunan, and I saw the document. He was there the day Avery died, and disappeared also that date. This couldn't be a coincidence, May, the mission in Hunan, this document, Stoner, these could be leads to finding your baby."

Melinda had told Maria she appreciated the help and the effort, and asked if Phil had known about the mission and the redacted document.

"I wanted to tell you first before him," she said. "Figured that since you work quite more efficiently than he does, you'd be able to work on something."

"I'm stuck in my apartment for three more months, Maria, with no resources," Melinda explained. "Meanwhile, Phil's in S.H.I.E.L.D., maybe he'd want to do something about it."

Maria had eyed her carefully that day. "You're refusing to look any further." she concluded. Melinda sighed.

"If my daughter was in Hunan the time the incident happened, and it will turn out she died along with the other villagers, I'd rather not look further, Maria."

"What if she wasn't killed?"

"Whole village, Maria, you said it yourself—"

"You're refusing because you've given up."

Somehow. Melinda thought that Maria could never be more right. She sighed and resigned herself from any more arguments against Maria.

Phil visits Melinda every night, only without her noticing his physical presence. He comes to visit to check on her every time he goes off from work. He would find Melinda asleep on the couch and he would carry her to her bed and lie down and rest with her for the night. In the morning, he would wake up early, cook breakfast for Melinda, go back to his apartment to bathe and change, and go to work; all done before Melinda would wake up to the faint smell of Phil on her bed beside her and the smell of breakfast in her kitchen.

He also calls Melinda during the day at least once, to check if Melinda had eaten her breakfast and if she had lunch. For her, it's annoying. She is fully capable of taking care of herself despite distress. She doesn't need any help at all. Phil knows of her capability of being able to take care of herself, and that's the thing. Taking care and helping Melinda is his way of coping from the loss. She decides to just go and play with it. Besides, it doesn't cost her much effort with Phil's help.

Weeks pass by and it's still the same routine. This time, however, there are some days when she feels a certain kind of absence beside her bed, and there's no food on her table. There aren't any rings from the telephone nor messages in her answering machine. This goes on for a few weeks, until there is completely no more essence of Phil beside her bed, no more rings on the telephone nor messages in her answering machine.

She opens her dresser only to find that thew few clothes he supposedly has in her place are gone. For Melinda, that was the end of it.

Two months in Melinda's leave, she is sitting on her couch, sipping a cup of tea one cold morning. A month to go before she goes back to S.H.I.E.L.D., and surely things will be different once she goes back. She will have to re-introduce herself to the new director, Nick Fury, and catch up with more trainings with Victoria and Maria. She would drown herself in missions and ops, to keep her mind and body busy. It's her way of coping.

She wonders how Phil is coping. She wonders if Phil is also doing the same method of coping as she is, and drowns himself in missions. She wonders how he is doing.

She sets her tea on the side table and stands up. She walks to her room and opens her closet. She squats and pulls out a box underneath all her hung clothes. She opens it and takes the small pair of baby shoes she had bought months ago, when she thought everything will turn out fine with her baby. For months, she never shed a tear on what happened. It's not that she's fine with what happened, it's just that she never really thought of it.

But now looking at the small baby shoes which will never be worn again, she sits back down and leans against her bed frame, holding the small shoes against her chest. For the first time in months, she begins to cry, for the baby she gave birth to but had never met.

A/N: I mentioned the Hunan incident there. It will be a big part of the pic (woops, spoiler) but don't get too assuming on stuff, though! ;)