Omg, SORRY FOR THE LONG TIME IT TOOK! I'm in a hurry though right now, so I'm sorry, I can't really explain right now. Review, PLEASE and ENJOY!
"Guess what starts tomorrow, un!" Deidara said excitedly.
"BATTLE OF THE SEXES!" Most of the Akatsuki members cheered from the couches, chairs, or even the ground.
Konan grimaced. "We need more female members. It's so hard being the only girl! And Battle of the Sexes lasts a whole week!"
"Konan, you're just jealous because you've never won," Sasori pointed out.
"Yeah, and we only get another f*ckin' bitch here if you would f*ckin' win for once," Hidan stated.
"That's still not fair!" Konan whined. "Just one female member wouldn't hurt! Maybe girls would win for once…"
"No, guys rule the Akatsuki," Kisame said with a "WHOO!"
"Um, Kisame, what's Battle of the Sexes?" Sasuke asked curiously.
Kisame looked dumbstruck at the Uchiha. "You don't remember!"
Sasuke shamefully shook his head.
"It's where the boys and girls, aka Konan, compete against each other in a series of games for 7 WHOLE DAYS! Guys always win, but it's still fun."
Suddenly, Pein walked into the room. "Yes, Battle of the Sexes starts tomorrow," he said solemnly. "But there are TWO young men that will not get to participate."
Konan wore a nasty smile as all the guys (except Kakuzu) nervously sweatdropped. Pein's eyes scanned each one, sending shivers up their spines.
His Rinnegan eyes flashed onto Itachi and Kisame, and he jabbed his purple-painted index and birdie fingers at the two. "You! Itachi and Kisame. I would like to speak to you for a moment."
Sasuke and Kisame exchanged nervous glances before following their leader out of the living room, down the corridor, and up the spiral staircase to his office.
The second the office door shut behind the three, Kisame piped up, "What—"
Pein held up a hand to silence him. Kisame instantly shut it. The three were engulfed in a complete dead silence, just standing like idiots in front of the door.
This is awkward… Sasuke thought, staring at Pein.
Unexpectedly, Pein started toward his desk on the other side of the room and sat down in the office chair. He folded his hands in front of himself on the desk and stared at Kisame and Sasuke.
"What were you going to say, Kisame?" he said sullenly.
Kisame gaped at him. "Wait, did you really have to sit down to hear what I was about to say?"
"What were you going to say, Kisame?" Pein repeated, a slight edginess to his voice.
Kisame shook his head, dumbstruck. "What is this all about, leader-sama? Why do you want to talk to us?"
Pein sighed. "Take a seat, boys."
The two criminals took a seat across from their leader. Pein's eyes shifted back and forth between the two, who just stared back. What was up with him today?
"I am," he started, freakishly silent, "VERY disappointed in both of you."
"WHAT!" Kisame and Sasuke screeched at the same time.
"What! What did we DO!" Sasuke roared.
"You've failed ONE mission over and over again," Pein said. His eyes seemed to be glowing, almost. "Can anyone guess what that one mission is?"
Silence.
When no one responded, Pein slammed his fist down. "You idiots! Itachi, what village are you from?"
"Uh…" Sasuke said, giving Pein a crusty look, "Konoha?"
"Yes. And what do you and Kisame always go to search for in Konoha!"
At the same time, Kisame and Sasuke both drew in a sharp breath and said in surprise, "The Jinchuuriki!"
"YES!" Pein shrieked, causing the other two members to wince
He never has this much personality… I just hope it doesn't get like that ONE time Orochimaru left… Kisame thought with a shudder.
Pein stood up and began to pace in front of Kisame and Sasuke. "Now, I'm going to send you back to Konoha. But THIS time…" he looked at Sasuke, giving him the death glare, "I want you to return… with Naruto Uzumaki. However, if you return empty-handed…" he clasped his hands on the Uchiha's shoulder, his eyes blazing. Sasuke gulped as Kisame sweatdropped.
"You will no longer be members of this organization!" Pein finished.
Kisame instantly panicked. "No, leader-sama, NO! Where will we go? What will we DO!" Kisame fell to his knees and wrapped his arms around Pein's ankles. "Oh, leader-sama! Please don't do this to us! We'll do anything! I'll do anything! For YOU!" Kisame appeared to be sobbing into Pein's feet. Pein's eye began to twitch as Kisame continued weeping and begging.
"Um," Sasuke started. Ignoring Kisame, Pein turned his attention toward the calmer one. "Kisame has a point. Where will we go? And what will we do?"
Pein shrugged. "I dunno. You'll just have to fend for yourself."
"Oh, leader-sama! I love this place and everyone here! This is my HOME!" Kisame continued rattling on in between sobs.
Sasuke was feeling a bit uneasy. "But… where else will we be accepted? What if I run into Ita— er… Sasuke?"
"Maybe you won't get the fight you expected, but at least he'll avenge the clan."
"Wait… what?"
Pein cocked his head to the side. "Itachi, isn't that what you wanted?"
Sasuke furrowed his brow. "What did I want?"
Pein shook his head. "Ugh, Itachi, Itachi, Itachi… Still a little forgetful there, hmm? I guess you DID have a very big… fall out the window…"
"Pein-sama," Sasuke said, a trace of frustration in his voice. "What did I want!"
"Oh, LEADER-SAMA!"
"SHUT UP, KISAME!" Pein kicked Kisame in the face.
"OUCH!"
Now, the room was silenced. Kisame held his position, hugging Pein's feet.
"Now then, Itachi. What were you saying?"
Sasuke sighed. "This is the THIRD TIME I've had to say this. What did you say about Sasuke avenging the clan?"
"Well," Pein began, "that's what you wanted for Sasuke. Vengeance. I mean, it wasn't YOUR choice to kill the clan. So you kept the actual secret from him so that he would someday become one of the strongest ninja, find you when he was ready, and kill you. But right before you die, you said something about planting your own power into him. The truth will NEVER be revealed to him. EVER!"
Sasuke felt like he had just been struck with a lightning bolt. The truth? There WAS no truth. Itachi was just a mindless jerk. Besides, what real, logical reason would there be to massacre an entire clan?
None.
"Haha, very funny," Sasuke mused. "Remind me to laugh later."
Pein shrugged. "Suit yourself. But you know it's true." Kisame was down on the ground, nodding in agreement (he was the only other member who knew).
"Now, go get ready," the leader commanded the two. "I don't want to have to lose my best member." He eyed the Uchiha before escorting the two men out.
:)
"What route are we taking?"
Kakashi eyed the map. "Well, there's a coffe shop about seven miles away. That can be the rest point."
"SEVEN MILES!" Naruto exclaimed.
"Yes, stupid," Sakura added. Then she turned to Itachi and flashed her pearly whites. "What do YOU think, Sasuke-kun?"
Itachi just shrugged, still grumpy from the meeting with Tsunade…
:)
Team 7 had gathered in Tsunade's office, but Itachi was late after his visit to the Uchiha territory.
"It's about TIME you got here!" Tsunade barked.
Itachi pursed his lips as he walked forward to join the team.
"Now, I have a mission for you all." The Hokage stood up and clamped cuffs, identical to the one around Itachi's wrist, around the rest of their wrists.
"Wha…?" Naruto lifted his arm to study the cuff.
"Lady Tsunade, what are these for?" Sakura asked politely, also studying her own.
"They're so I know that Sasuke's stays with you the whole time." She gave Itachi the death glare. "You four," she jabbed her four fingers at Kakashi, Sakura, Sai, and Naruto, "will get these off after the mission is over. Sasuke, however, will have to keep his on… forEVER!"
"WHAT!" Itachi stamped his foot. "WHY!"
"Because, it's like I told you earlier! You CANNOT be trusted under ANY circumstances!"
"Ugh!" Itachi rolled his eyes in utter frustration.
"Now, then. I've chosen this team to be bodyguards for the princess's travel back to her hometown. You will be escorting the Princess of the Water Country. But you only have to get to a certain point, where the next bodyguards will be waiting to escort her the rest of the way. Also, be easy on her. She doesn't know what the hell is going on or where she is. She can't remember a thing."
"YES, a PRINCESS!" Naruto jumped up and down excitedly.
"Shut up, Naruto! She's in the room right next to this one!"
"But Tsunade—"
"BUTTON LIP JUTSU!"
Suddenly, a pink button appeared over Naruto's lips. He brushed his fingers across them, a startled expression on his face. The other four in the room dropped their jaws to the floor.
"Now, who's next?" Tsunade asked, threateningly flitting her eyes to each individual, as if daring them to speak.
No one said another word.
"Very well," the Hokage said. She picked up a black walkie-talkie and said into it, "Shizune! Send in the princess!"
"Yes, sir!" A crackled voice came from the walkie-talkie.
The door opened behind Team 7, and in stepped Shizune. Trailing behind her was a beautiful young woman. Her long, purple hair fell down to her waist in a ponytail. Her large eyes were lined thick with eyelashes, and her eyes a deep crimson, with a bit of awkward and nervous in them as well. Her red lips were twisted into a nervous frown as her dark eyes shyly, curiously wandered around the room.
Despite her beauty, she didn't exactly take on the appearance of a princess. She wore a tattered white dress that was cut in uneven strips around her pale chicken legs. She had no shoes on, and her hair was a bit messed with.
"Team 7," Tsunade said, standing up and walking to stand next to Shizune and the princess. "This is Princess Emiko of the Water Country. Emiko…"
The princess nervously snapped her head in Tsunade's direction. "Wh-what?" she stuttered.
"These ninja will be your temporary escorts," Tsunade said kindly. Too kindly…
"Oh, um… hi." Emiko said, dropping her eyes to the ground. Her cheeks became a rosy pink.
"Emiko has just arrived, and hasn't gotten much rest. We already knew who she was, and we wanted to get her back to her country as soon as possible. Please go easy on her.
"She's… a princess?" Sakura was at Emiko's side, looking her up and down with an unsure expression on her face. Sakura lifted a strip of dirty white cloth from Emiko's outfit and examined it closely.
"Oh, um… yeah, I guess. I didn't know I was, but… I guess that I'm the princess of a country."
"The Water Country, Emiko," Tsunade said, her voice literally dripping with sugar as if she were talking to a small child. "You are the princess of the Water Country.
"Oh, yeah, I forgot…"
Tsunade beamed, but her expression was soon changed to a scowl in Itachi's direction. "Come here, you!"
"Wha— WHAT DID I DO!"
Tsunade stomped over and clamped something onto his wrists.
Handcuffs.
"You will NOT be hurting this young lady in ANY way!"
Now she was clamping something onto his ankles.
MORE handcuffs.
"WHAT THE HELL!" Itachi yelled. "What do you think I'm going to do? And how am I supposed to travel with these… things on my ankles!"
"Well, Sas-u-ke," Tsunade enunciated. "I think you're going to try and… repopulate… your clan." She said the word "repopulate" with a rather awkward hand gesture. "Secondly, you'll just have to hop.
"WHAT!"
:)
Can you see why he was so bitter?
"Where's the point the other bodyguards are waiting at?" Sai asked curiously.
"Mmm…" Kakashi squinted down at the map. "Not too far from the coffee shop. You know, I know the lady that works there. She has a HUMUNGOUS nose… maybe we'll get a discount on coffee."
"Is there ramen?"
"Yes, there is ra—"
"ALRIGHT! LET'S GO!"
As Naruto ran down the path, Sakura, Kakashi, and Itachi all watched him as they sweatdropped. Sai, however, walked up to the princess and extended his pasty white hand.
"I haven't officially introduced myself," he said, taking her hand. "I'm Sai."
"H-hey…" she said, looking very nervous and desparate.
:)
"What route should we take?"
Speak of the devil…
Sasuke looked down at the map he was holding, just like Kakashi was doing at this VERY moment.
"There's a coffee shop a ten miles away. That can be our rest point."
"TEN MILES!"
"Yes, stupid. Ten miles. Think you can handle that?"
"No…"
"Well, deal with it then, dammit!" Sasuke was also grouchy like his brother. He did NOT want to go back to Konoha…
I don't blame him.
"Hey, can I see that map again?" Kisame asked.
"Sure." Sasuke handed him the map.
Kisame snatched it and looked at it closely. Suddenly, his face brightened with a realization. "Hey! I've been to that coffee shop! Is it that one with the lady with the HUMUNGOUS nose?"
"Um, sure, I guess…"
"Okay, then. Let's stop there!"
The two set off on their journey as Team 7 began theirs, taking the same path at opposite sides, completely unaware of what they would encounter.