I'M BAAAAAAAAACKKK! WHOO! I'm sorry that it took forever to upload! I never have any time! WAAHH! :( But I made this chapter extra long just for you! It kinda sucks, but I wanted it do get done! I don't want to upset you guys!
Enjoy!
Ding!
As two criminals opened the door to the coffee shop, the lady behind the counter turned around.
Whoa, Kisame was SOO right about the big nose…
"Kisame-chan!" she said warmly, running up from behind the counter, wrapping the shark man in a large hug. While hugging, the two jumped up and down excitedly as they burst into a series of giggling and chuckling. Sasuke felt as though he were scarred for life.
When they stopped jumping up and down, the big-nosed lady slightly pulled away from Kisame, just enough to look up at him. "I haven't seen you in so long! How are you sweetie?"
Kisame grinned and unraveled himself from the woman's hug. "I'm great!" he said ecstatically. He put his arm around Sasuke. "My partner and I are on a mission, so we decided to take a small break here."
The big-nose lady extended her hand to shake Sasuke's hand with a wink. "Hey, hott stuff!" Sasuke shuddererd and quickly pulled his hand out of the woman's grasp.
She giggled then looked back at Kisame. "So, what do you want? It's on the house!"
"Sweet!" Kisame said happily. "I'll take a cappuccino!"
The lady looked at Sasuke. "And for you, honey-cakes?"
"A-a l-la-a-att-t-tt-e-e-e…" Sasuke stuttered nervously.
"Alrighty then, I'll be there as soon as possible!" She disappeared behind the counter.
Kisame turned to Sasuke. "Okay, Itachi. I'm gonna go find us a table. You wait for the coffee."
"Hold on, man!" Sasuke grabbed Kisame's shoulder before he disappeared. "I don't want to be alone with her!"
There was a silence as the two men listened to her tone-deaf humming from behind the counter.
Kisame looked at his best friend (or what he thought was his best friend) deep in the eye. Then, he uttered one word.
"Relax."
They had some sort of awkward staring contest.
"Besides," Kisame said more whole-heartedly, "you're NOT alone."
Sasuke looked around the empty shop. There was no one, as far as he could see. Maybe in the other rooms, but STILL!
"Um, yes I am, stupid!" Sasuke said, motioning around (more like flailing his arms in every direction).
"Actually, no, you're not," said Kisame. He flipped his head to his side. "There seems to be a young boy that just jumped behind that table over there."
Sasuke glanced around, but saw nothing. "Um, Kisame, you're a big fat liar—" When he looked back to where Kisame stood, he realized that he had somehow, magically disappeared. "Faggot," Sasuke mumbled. He looked around a little bit more closely, examining the room. Suddenly, he heard a rustle in the far corner of the room. The Uchiha's head snapped in the direction the sound came from. There, in the corner, was the most beautiful pot of flowers he had ever seen.
"Ah! How lovely!" Sasuke said aloud, clasping his hands together while he popped his leg and beamed at the flowers. He began to speed walk across the shop, wanting to admire the beautiful pink and red flowers up close.
But then he noticed something ELSE…
Behind the pot, he saw something. Someone. The back of his head was exposed, and he could see the familiar spiky black hair. That was too familiar. As the man turned his head slightly to the side, Sasuke could see the bangs falling over his pale cheeks.
Was this really happening?
Now, the flowers were the last thing on the young man's mind. He continued his speed walk over to the pot, reached out his right hand, and grabbed the back of the man's shirt. As Sasuke tugged on the Uchiha's shirt, he heard a yelp as he pulled him aggressively backwards, knocking over the flowers.
"NOOOO!" Both of them yelled as they watched the glass shatter. Sasuke looked up to glare… at himself?
Wow, he was looking into his own eyes.
Sasuke was angry. He was pissed OFF. He knew exactly who the real imposter was.
Itachi Uchiha.
Sasuke would do anything. ANYTHING. All he wanted to do was to kill Itachi at that very moment, but how could he. The younger Uchiha just stood there, gaping and shaking all over. Sweat was beginning to drip down his forehead.
What to do? What to do! Sasuke was starting to lose it when all of a sudden…
"What. Have you done. To my hair."
Itachi was PISSED. Sasuke was here, in HIS body, knocking over the lovely flowers Itachi was hiding behind/admiring.
But what made him even angrier was seeing his own hair, NOT tied back like it usually was!
"What. Have you done. To my hair." Itachi said, dangerously low. His hands balled up into fists.
Sasuke reached back and brushed his brother's hair, looking a bit shocked. "I… I thought it looked really wussy in a ponytail," Sasuke said, true honesty in his voice. Itachi wasn't too sure, but he sounded a bit like a sassy five year old.
"I hate it," Itachi said. "I hate it, I hate it, I hate it…"
"I don't care," Sasuke interrupted. "It looks better to ME, that's what matters. I mean, I'm trapped in your body, and all, it's not like I can help that at all…"
"That's not my fault!" Itachi snapped. "News flash, Sasuke- I don't want to be in THIS" he motioned to the body he was currently in "either!"
"Itachi, I could kill you right now! I could KILL you!" Sasuke said, hysteria rising in his voice.
Oh, shit, he's about to start bawling, Itachi thought desperately.
"Sasuke, settle down!" Itachi said. Because that will help TONS.
"NO!" Sasuke sounded even more like a sassy five year old.
"Shh, quiet down!" Itachi hissed.
"NO!" Sasuke said again, his black eyes beginning to well up.
Not good.
As if there was some sort of magnetic field around the two brothers, everyone that was associated with them appeared out of the other rooms. Kakashi, Sakura, Sai, Emiko, Naruto, Kisame. They were all there.
Shit! This is humiliating! Itachi thought upon seeing Kisame.
First there was silence. Then there were shocked expressions everywhere.
As Naruto's eyebrows narrowed downward, he attempted to charge at Itachi (which was actually Sasuke). Kakashi and Sakura both held him back, while glaring at the Uchiha.
"Dude, Itachi," Kisame said, giving Sasuke a weird look, thanks to the watery, bloodshot eyes. "What's up? Did you tell him the truth, or something?"
"WHAT TRUTH IS THERE TO TELL!" Sasuke yelled, his voice cracking. Itachi face-palmed. "Why does everyone keep saying something about 'the truth'?"
"Because, there IS a truth, you imbecile!" Itachi screeched.
"What the hell is going on!" Kisame asked, looking at the two bewilderedly. "Itachi, you're acting like you're Sasuke, or something."
"Look," Itachi looked up at his pathetic younger brother (which he hated to admit, but Sasuke was making him look pretty sorry right now). "If anyone is about to start sobbing, it should be me. And do I look close to tears?"
"You look close to exploding," Sasuke automatically responded.
"I AM!"
"SO AM I!"
"UGH!" Itachi said, exasperated. "Sasuke, just let me talk to you!"
"You ARE talking to me, dummy!" Sasuke said.
"Whoa, back up a sec," Kisame suddenly said from the other side of the room. "Did I just see Sasuke call Itachi 'Sasuke'? And Itachi responded to that?" Kisame was giving the brothers a rather puzzled look. "That's real… trippy," he said lamely.
"Sakura? Sakura!" Kakashi was suddenly saying. The room was silenced as everyone looked over at the pink haired girl, her cheeks flushing pink. She was more pale than usual, watching her beloved Sasuke (actually Itachi) with fear in her green eyes. Then, just like that, she collapsed. Blacked out.
Kakashi leaned down and picked her up bridle style. Then he looked over at Naruto.
"Naruto! Get Sasuke and let's get out of here. Sai—" He looked at Sai seriously. "Do you think you can handle taking Emiko to the other bodyguards by yourself?"
"Uh…" Sai was turning pink. "S-sure…" He glanced at Emiko, who was clinging nervously onto his shoulder. This made him blush even more.
Kakashi put a hand on Sai's free shoulder. "I'm counting on you. I know you can do it."
"Thanks, Kakashi-sensei," Sai said formally. Then he took Emiko's hand and the two ran hurriedly out the door.
"Aww, but I want to fight!" Naruto complained.
"Ooh-la-la!"
Everyone looked in the direction of the uncalled for voice. There stood the lady with the big nose, looking flirtatiously over at Sasuke and Itachi. "Check it out! Brothers! And they're both sexy! I think I hit the jackpot!"
Must I say that a gay baby was born?
She began to flounce over. "Hello, boys. How's about a threesome tonight?" Suddenly, she stuck her hand in her bra and threw a condom down on the floor. Worst hint ever. "Oopsie, I think I dropped this!"
Naruto gawked at the old, unattractive woman. "Okay, nevermind about the fight. We're out of here, Sasuke."
Naruto took fast strides across the room until he was at his "teammates'" side.
"Wait, Naruto…" Itachi looked at his brother. "I want to talk to him. Just for a minute."
Naruto looked at him as if he were going psycho. "No! You're coming back to Konoha right now!"
"Just for a minute!" Itachi pleaded.
"Not a good idea, Sasuke!" Naruto was nervously eyeing the giggly coffee shop owner. Then he leaned into him and said quietly, "You're not actually thinking about the threesome, are you?"
Itachi's eyes widened and he looked crazily at Naruto. "No! I just have to settle something with him! There's no fight! No threesome, either! Just talking!"
Naruto folded his arms and glared at the two brothers. "Okay, but Sasuke…" he looked desparately at what he thought was his best friend. "Don't get all obsessed with revenge again. Please, just don't let it happen. I…" He looked away for a second then looked back up at "Sasuke." "I don't want to lose you again. None of us do. It was really hard when you were gone. Just… just stay with us. Please."
The real Sasuke looked over at Naruto, knowing that he meant what he was saying. He wanted Sasuke back, even though they had their ups and downs before he had gone with Orochimaru. Naruto cared more about him than he cared about anyone else in Konoha.
Itachi sighed, and then smiled at Naruto. "Trust me, I won't let anything happen."
Naruto looked suspiciously at "Sasuke." Then, without saying another word, he was gone. Everyone else was gone.
Sasuke started talking. "Why did you do it?" he asked crossly.
Itachi sighed and looked at the ground. "You know why," he said. "Because I wanted power. The power of the Mangekyou Sharingan. And look, I have it." Itachi said, keeping up his lie.
"Tell me something," Sasuke said, narrowing his eyes. "Is there a truth behind it?"
Without blinking an eye, Itachi replied "That IS the truth."
Then there was one of those meaningful silences where Itachi knew that Sasuke knew he was lying, and Sasuke knew that Itachi wasn't telling him what he wanted to know. But at the same time, Sasuke WAS getting what he wanted to know, because he didn't want to believe that there was a truth behind why he killed the clan. I mean, what would be a good enough reason for him to kill them ALL?
Well, that's what Sasuke was thinking, anyways.
"Just know something." Itachi said. Sasuke snapped out of it.
Itachi knew what he wanted to tell Sasuke: The real truth. But he couldn't! That would ruin his plan of vengeance! So he fought back the urge to tell his beloved younger brother and instead said: "When we both get our bodies back, keep expecting to fight. We will fight one day, and whoever is the last man standing will be the most powerful man in the history of the Uchiha clan. Remember, Sasuke. I'll be waiting for you."
Sasuke narrowed his eyes even more. "And I'm ready. Just wait. Wait until we're back where we're supposed to be."
"I'm looking forward to it," Itachi said sorrowfully. But upon seeing Sasuke's smirk, he forced one on his face as well.
Suddenly, there was a bang in the other room where Naruto, Kisame, and the coffee shop owner had disappeared to. Both Naruto and Kisame stumbled out, looking enraged.
"Oh, no you didn't!" They both yelled at the same time. Then, they looked over at their teammates and began taking long steps over to them.
"That's it, Sasuke. You are NOT going to stay another second here with the freaky big-nosed rapist! We're heading BACK to Konoha right now!" Naruto was saying as Kisame said: "Okay, we're not staying here, that lady is a creep. I thought she was nice, but NO! She's going to rape you both if you stay here another second! We're leaving, Itachi!"
At the same time, Kisame/Naruto grabbed Sasuke's/Itachi's wrist.
I think that they found their doubles that night…
Before they were separated, Itachi looked over his shoulder, as if he were possessed by something, and automatically said:
"There really is a truth. I just couldn't tell you."
Then he was gone.
:)
Kisame dragged Sasuke along, who stumbled behind him, out of the coffee shop.
"What the f*ck was that!" Kisame looked incredulously back at his partner. "Thanks to you, the Jinchuuriki got away!"
"Uh, actually you could've stopped him…" Sasuke pointed out.
"Don't be such a smart aleck. Itachi, do you realize what this means?"
"We're goners."
"Exactly." Kisame looked up into the dark sky. "We're not in the Akatsuki anymore. We're on our own."
Sasuke also looked up into the sky. He did NOT want to admit it, but… he didn't want to leave. He wanted to stay there, maybe in his own body, with everyone. Deidara, Hidan, Konan, Kakuzu, Zetsu, Sasori, Pein… he'd miss them all. More than anything. Well, besides Itachi…
He was still trapped in Itachi's body, but after that whole episode, he wanted Itachi back even more. He wasn't sure why. Did he want to kill him? What was this truth, and was it real? Itachi said it was… There were so many unanswered questions, and it was driving him absolutely crazy.
"Hey, Itachi." Sasuke looked over at Kisame. "Are you gonna miss being in the Akatsuki? I mean, I know that you didn't want to be here to start with, but… will you miss it now?"
Sasuke looked down at his feet, slowly walking beside Kisame's. "I guess I am. I mean, being around them so long has gotten me attached, you know…"
"Yeah," Kisame said. Then he looked at his partner with a quizzical look on his blue face. "Uh, and why did you say you were Sasuke in there?"
Sasuke sweatdropped. "Um… I don't know… I was just… so shocked… to see him."
"O...kay…?"
Awkwardness…
The two walked in silence for about twenty minutes, slowly, taking their time getting back to the base. Then Kisame broke the silence.
"Itachi, do you know where you're gonna go?"
Sasuke frowned. "I want to go back to Konoha." He was telling the truth. "But I don't know how I can do that…"
Kisame frowned as well. "You'll find a way," he said quietly.
"What about you, Kisame? Where are you gonna go?"
Sasuke thought he could see a slight smile on his lips. "I want to go back to the ocean," Kisame stated. "I've always wanted to keep living there, but instead I joined the Akatsuki."
"Then why'd you join?"
"Because, I just wanted to be powerful," Kisame said. "And I am. Akatsuki has taught me a lot. But, now that I think of it," Kisame looked at the Uchiha with a sad smile on his face, "it's probably time for me to say goodbye."
Sasuke sadly smiled back at the man that he had become so attached to over the half year. "Yeah, me too," he replied. And he was telling the truth.
The two criminals had walked so slowly, that by the time they got back to the Akatsuki base, dawn was turning to morning. As they walked in, they heard everyone merrily laughing and chatting in the kitchen. Followed by a "F*CK YOU!" by Hidan, a giggle from Konan, and a "WHOOO!" by Deidara.
Sasuke and Kisame trekked upstairs to Pein's office to deliver the news.
"WHAT!" Pein slammed his fist on the desk, making it crack slightly. He didn't seem to care.
Both men in the room with him winced. "Hey, chill," Kisame said coolly.
"You both do know what this means, don't you?" Pein said, heeding Kisame's advice.
"Yeah, we just wanted to let you know. But we're gonna go pack up now," Kisame said. He was being much more mature than before they had left on the mission. Sasuke and Kisame both turned and headed toward the door.
"Hold up, Itachi," Pein said from behind. "I'd like to have a word with you. Kisame, I'll speak with you after."
"Yessir," they both said at the same time. Kisame left the office, leaving Sasuke standing there alone with Pein.
The leader stood up and made his way over to where his favorite member was standing. He placed his hand on the Uchiha's shoulder. "Itachi, I don't want to do this. You know I don't. But I have no choice." He stared intently into his eyes. "If you can't do this, then I don't know who else can."
Sasuke nodded. "I understand," he said.
"Just know that I'll miss you, I can't even describe how much, and I'll never have another member that can ever take your place. Ever."
Sasuke looked into his sincere, sad eyes. "A-aww…" he said rather pathetically, his voice shaking.
"Itachi, please don't…" Pein winced, and now his voice was shaking.
"I'll miss you too, I can't even say how much," his voice was freakishly high.
Pein did this weird screechy thing before clutching onto Sasuke into a tight hug.
"Why! Why am I DOING this! WHY!" Pein said over Sasuke's shoulder.
Sasuke immediately calmed down. "Wait… what? Are you serious, you don't know why? Um, you know why you have to do this… it's a dumb reason, but still… you know…"
Pein stopped as well. "Oh, yeah… it is a dumb reason, but I keep to my word, you know…"
A gay baby was born. Pein looked away, as did Sasuke. They stayed like that for a LONG time… And I mean, it seemed like years, it was so awkward.
"Uh, can I go now? I kinda have to get my things together, and all…" Sasuke finally piped up.
"Oh, yeah, good idea," Pein quickly let go of Sasuke. "Uh, send in Kisame, I guess."
"O-okay." Sasuke hastily turned and was OUT of there. He walked down the hall to his room, trying to forget what had just happened.
He approached Kisame's door and knocked on it. "Uh, Kisame? Leader-sama wants to see you in his office."
"Alright," Kisame's muffled voice said from behind the door.
Sasuke walked further down the hall to his own room and shut the door behind him. The first thing in the room that caught his eye was Aname, sitting there on his bed.
"Hey," she said.
"Aname? What are you doing here? I thought I'd never see you again," Sasuke said, the shock plainly heard in his voice.
"Well, I have you all ready," she patted a suitcase next to her. "Sasuke, I know that you've enjoyed your time here. Don't try to hide it, I know you have. But it really is time for you to say goodbye. Besides, I have a plan for both you and your brother."
Sasuke raised one eyebrow. "Um, okay…"
"You'll see what it is soon enough," Aname said.
Because guess what? She had put a mystery item in HIS suitcase as well. Just like with Itachi's!
Oh, what is it? WHAT IS IT! I bet I'm driving you crazy! ;)
:)
The mood in the base had changed from "YEAH! BATTLE OF THE SEXES RULES!" to " :,-(" Yes, it was a very sad day for them all. And also very dramatic.
Kisame and Sasuke walked slowly down the hall, saying their goodbyes to each individual member. Konan gave them both a big hug, telling them through her sobs said that she would kill Pein for doing this.
They both walked out the door. The day was nice and sunny, but it sucked because they were pretty much leaving all their friends behind. Now would YOU enjoy that? I think not!
Kisame looked over at Sasuke. "Well, I guess this is it…" he said sadly.
Sasuke silently nodded his head. They stood on the path, right in the middle of an intersection. "Yeah. Well, I hope you enjoy the ocean," Sasuke said with a sad smile.
"Yeah, thanks," Kisame said. "Good luck, Itachi. If you don't know where to go, then you can always come with me. You know where I'm going."
Sasuke nodded his head. "Thanks Kisame. I'll miss you," he said truthfully.
"I'll miss you too!"
Then there was a dramatic "Goodbye forever! Nice knowin' ya! You were my best friend, I will miss you soooo frickin' much! May we cross paths again!" type of hug thing.
Then, when they separated, Sasuke said. "See ya later."
Kisame smiled. "Yeah, I'll see ya later."
Then, they turned to walk their separate ways.
Haa, I'm sorry about the dramatic ending. But you should THANK me for finally putting this up! :P And making it extra long! So, I'm gonna try to do better... I really have missed this story! :( So I hope you liked it! Review my hard work, please!