Punching Through

by Eydie Munroe

Disclaimer: They're owned by Paramount/CBS. It's a pity really, since they don't seem to have any idea what to do with them. Studio thinking….go fig.

Author Note: This is my contribution to VAMB's 2014 Secret Drabble Challenge. My gift to Joywriter, who provided a great opening line. Thanks to Hester for the as-always awesome beta services. Enjoy!

The gym seemed the obvious place for her to work off steam, and she had plenty of it.

Kathryn threw her weight against the heavy bag time and time again, grunting in discomfort every time her glove connected with its worn leather surface. She didn't really want to be here – it hadn't been her idea. But the demons of the day – namely Admiral Ramsey and his council of minions – were still taunting her memory, convincing her to punch even harder.

She started to call up combinations, just like Chakotay's holographic Boothby had once taught her when he'd suggested she try boxing. Despite her current exertion and mood, she couldn't help the ironic smile that crossed her lips. Thinking of that hologram brought her thoughts to the creature she had met on Species 8472's training facility in the Delta Quadrant. She'd hated how that overpowering adversary had tainted the memory of the groundskeeper; even though they'd called a truce with them, she never thought of Boothby in the same way again. In a way, she was relieved when she'd found out that he'd died before their return home – she felt she'd never be able to speak to him in the same way.

"What's so funny?"

She looked up to the sparring partner who was holding the heavy bag in place. "What?"

"You were smiling. It's the first time I've seen you do it since you got here."

Kathryn ignored her as she started to punch again. "I wasn't."

Phoebe Janeway rolled her eyes as she leaned her weight back into the bag again. "Katie, I know what it looks like when you smile." She was pushed slightly off balance by a couple solid blows, and had to readjust her footing. "God knows it's not something you do very often these days." When she didn't get a response, she started to get annoyed. "Are you even listening to me?"

Her sister looked up suddenly. "What?"

"I just told you I decided to join Starfleet," Phoebe taunted, her hand resting on her hip. "I leave for the Academy next week."

"Don't forget to tell Todd where you went," Kathryn mumbled as she focused on the bag once more.

Finally having enough, Phoebe grabbed her sister by the bicep and pulled her away to a quieter corner of the gym. "Alright, what is going on with you?"

"What makes you think something's wrong?" the elder sister questioned, yanking her arm back as she started walking.

"Because I never find you in the boxing area," Phoebe pointed out as they continued to move toward the front of the building. "And you're never here before I get here. But today you're not only early, but you're beating that heavy bag like it was a Borg queen. So what gives?"

For a while, Kathryn didn't say anything, but continued on until they made it through the doors and out into a glorious day of late Indiana afternoon sunshine. Phoebe kept up with her, sensing that her sister had something important she wanted to talk about, but knew to hold off for the moment.

Kathryn's brain was in a whirl. All of the stresses of the day were still alive and well, despite her unusual measures, and she needed to exorcise them. What had started as Phoebe just leading her away from her workout had turned into aggressive walking, and now she felt the need to start running as they crossed the street – the run that the sisters were supposed to have gone on when they'd agreed to meet at the gym. Following the path into the park, Kathryn felt every pound of her feet on the ground reverberate up through her body, but she didn't care. She needed to run. And to her credit, Phoebe kept up with her the entire way.

Eventually the irritation and her energy ran out, and forced Kathryn to slow down and eventually stop. She was surprised to find Phoebe still beside her, patiently waiting for an answer to the question she'd asked fifteen minutes earlier. Leaning forward with her still-gloved hands on her knees as she caught her breath, Kathryn finally said, "They want to promote me."

Phoebe frowned. "That's a good thing, isn't it?"

Her sister shrugged. "I don't know."

Again Phoebe took Kathryn by the arm, gently this time, and led her to a nearby bench. "But this is what you always wanted," she pointed out as she started to open the bindings on Kathryn's gloves. When she didn't get a response, she prodded, "Katie?"

Kathryn blew out a long sigh. "You know, it always was, for the longest time. But now…I'm wondering if it's what I want after all."

"Tired?"

"You have no idea."

"Well, it's pretty quick for them to be dangling an admiralship in front of you, no? I mean, you've only been back for ten weeks." Phoebe thought for a moment. "What would you be doing?"

"Replacing Admiral Thompson as head of the Diplomatic Corps," she replied absently.

Kathryn's sister let out a derisive chuckle. "So, other than the fact that you haven't been in this quadrant for seven years and will need at least half that time to catch up on all the new players here, what's the problem?"

Judging by the look on Kathryn's face, Phoebe could tell that they were finally getting to the heart of the issue. "It means giving up Voyager," the captain admitted, her fingers unconsciously knotting together. "I was fully prepared to remain in command, but instead they'll give her to Chakotay, and put me behind a desk."

Phoebe couldn't help herself. "What? You afraid he's gonna crash it?"

Kathryn looked up at her in shock, but then started laughing when she saw that her sister was ribbing her. "How do you know about that?"

"Tom Paris," Phoebe laughed. "He was giving Chakotay a hard time about it at the homecoming party."

Kathryn frowned. "I don't remember that."

"It was while you were off being paraded in front of the press."

"Ugh." The laughter evaporated as Kathryn's problem surfaced. "I guess I'm just having a hard time adjusting to my new reality, that's all. I was never one to settle in one place for too long, but after being forced to…well, I guess I'm reluctant to get moving again."

"What's the alternative?"

"I stay captain of Voyager, and spend the better part of the next few years off in not-quite-so-deep space." She sighed. "I don't want to do that. I've missed you guys too much to be away that long again so soon."

"Yeah. I think Mom might tear Starfleet Command down brick by brick if they actually made you do it." She smiled when Kathryn laughed again. "When do you have to give them your decision?"

"By the end of the week."

"And what would you do if you turn it down?"

Kathryn sighed, but it was filled with mirth. "I don't know. I'm sure there must be two, maybe three jobs out there for out-of-work starship captains. The possibilities are endless."

Phoebe threaded her arm through her sister's. "Come on, let's go back. But instead of this exercise nonsense, I recommend a long soak in the spa and a massage afterwards. Then you can tell me all about Chakotay and his crash record."

Their laughter could be heard throughout the park and the gym, and they spent the rest of the day together talking, and helping Kathryn decide what she really wanted now that she was home.