Zuko told Katara all about Lin and Lee. Even though he was reluctant at first, he always felt better when he talked to her. And for the time being, it was easier to talk about this than other secrets that had recently been revealed to him—ones he had yet to fully accept.

"It's kinda crazy that here I was running away from my problems at the palace only to run right into another one." He sighed.

"It doesn't sound like they're a problem, though. Another twist in your family story, perhaps." Katara dipped a toe in the water and leaned into Zuko as they sat side by side on the pier.

"Yeah, but how do I make sure their story has a happy ending?"

"Zuko, you can't take responsibility for everything your father did."

"But they're f-f-family!"

"And you said Uncle is taking care of them. What more do you think you should do?"

"I don't know."

They sat in silence and watched the gentle ripple of the waves. Normally Zuko would find this to be peaceful, their quietness companionable, and her presence calming. But he knew he had more to say. It was pulling at his insides... or maybe it was pushing, like the tides. Regardless, being near the water hadn't provided the comfort he'd expected, yet he wasn't sure how to face going back to the palace, either.

"I did something yesterday that I'm ashamed of. I'm not sure what to do now," he started.

"Did you hurt somebody?"

"No. But I wanted to."

"Do you still want to?"

"I don't know."

"What happened?"

"I found out about Dr. Jung. And my mother. The Joo Dees. All of it."

"Zuko…"

"I was the one who brought him here. I'm even having sessions with him, and he turned out to be… how could he…" Zuko made a frustrated gesture with his fist.

"Zuko, you have to understand that he thought he was helping your mother. He was trying to get rid of her pain. When there's just so much pain, though, you almost have to get rid of… everything. I'm not defending him. But I think that's how he saw it."

"But, if he hadn't… if she hadn't… wait, you knew?"

"Zuko, I…" Katara searched for the right words as she took in the hurt expression on his face. "It wasn't my story to tell. I thought your mother would…" She took a deep breath. "Anyway, I think it was his version of giving her a happy ending to her story. He thought the only way was to give her a new beginning. I don't think he meant for everything that happened with the Dai Li…"

Zuko nodded. To some degree he could accept that explanation. Erasing sounded so much easier than facing anyway. But Dr. Jung took advantage of her when she was most vulnerable. His jaw clinched. "I went looking for him, but he wasn't in his office. I…burned half his books before I realized what I was doing. I stopped when I found…"

"What Zuko?"

"I haven't read it. I can't."

"What is it?"

"Dr. Jung is not the real enemy here. He… maybe you're right, he was trying to help. But he shouldn't have had to… it wouldn't have been necessary… she wouldn't even be there…if it hadn't been for…" He pinched the bridge of his nose. His inability to complete a sentence reflected his disjointed thoughts.

"Spirits, Zuko, you're father is a sick monster, but you can't change what he did or dwell on the past anymore. Move forward, leave him behind."

"I found her dream journal."

"Oh, Zuko. Don't. Nothing good can come from that. What did you do with it?"

"It's in my office. What should I do? Burn it?"

"Give it back to Dr. Jung."

"Why does he need it? Doesn't he want her to forget all that? Why does he need a record of it?"

"I don't know! Maybe he uses it when he's reading yours, like for comparisons or something. Maybe it's just good to have on hand for medical reference."

"My mother is NOT some case study. She is a real person whom he claims to love. Although he would just erase her memories like she's some medical experiment. I overestimated him. He should leave. I should send him back to Ba Sing Se."

"Zuko, what about Azula?"

"What about her?"

"Has he been able to help her? What happens to her if he leaves? Will they lose any progress she's made? Your mother didn't want him to stay, either, but she said he was the best for helping Azula."

"I don't care!"

"Don't you think Azula deserves a happy ending, too?"

"Did it ever occur to you that with my family, there is no such thing?" With that, Zuko pushed himself to his feet and stormed back toward the inn.

Katara gasped when she saw three-year-old Lee. The resemblance was unmistakable, disturbing even. Like she was literally looking into the face of a young, unscarred Zuko.

"Your eyes look like the ocean!" the boy exclaimed.

"Thank you," Katara said. "Your eyes look like the sun."

"Mommy says that, too."

"Hi, Lin, I'm Katara. I'm not sure if we officially met yesterday." She bowed to the woman. Who looks a lot like Ursa. OK, this is just creepy.

"Yes, thank you for your help." Lin returned the gesture.

"Hey!" Lee pointed at Zuko's face. "Mommy has marks like those on her—"

"Shhhhhh. Lee! It's not nice to say anything about—" Lin cupped a hand over the child's mouth.

"It's OK," Zuko said. He squatted down so he was at eye-level with Lee. "I got this in a fight once. If your mom has one, too, then she must be a very brave woman."

Katara felt Lin's blood go cold again. She had never known someone to literally become frozen by fear.

Lee nodded and pushed his mother's hand away. "Can you do the fire?"

"I can," Zuko replied. "Can you?"

"No," he pouted. "I like the fire. But I think it scares mommy."

"Fire can be scary if it is used for the wrong reasons." Zuko eyed the boy with some concern. "But it can also be helpful. Like it can keep you warm. Cook your food."

"Make tea! Mommy likes tea!"

"Hehe, I do, too. My uncle makes the best tea." Zuko smiled at the thought of Iroh meeting Lee and vowed that he would make it happen someday.

"What's an uncle?" Lee asked.

"Oh, it's your father's brother," Zuko answered automatically.

"Oh." Lee suddenly looked downcast. "I don't have a father."

Katara sensed the boiling sensation in Zuko's blood.

"You know what? I don't have a father, either. But I have lots of other people who take good care of me. And I bet you do, too."

"Yeah. Mommy and Nanny. And Magoo."

"Who?" Zuko and Katara asked in unison.

"Magoo. He's my kitaroo."

"Oooh! I saw one of those once. Can he jump really high?" Katara took Lee's hand and started leading him toward the house.

"Would you care for some tea?" Lin looked back at Zuko.

"Sure, I'll be there in a second."

Zuko let out a combined choke and a sob. It was one of those emotions that he had a hard time describing. There was something about what he had just said, though. I don't have a father, either.

It was true. Ozai had never been a father to him. Lee was only tied to the former Fire Lord by blood, yet had never met his father or knew what the man was capable of—what he had done. Katara is right. I am not bound to him any more than a bastard child would be. It's time to leave him behind. To let him go.

A few days later, Zuko took solace in an unusually quiet morning as far as Fire Lording responsibilities were concerned. He had a little bit of time in between meetings and no inclination toward the growing mountain of paperwork. He sat by the turtleduck pond instead thinking about all the things he had discovered in the past few days. Reports from a former spy revealed that in his mother's efforts to save him, she had actually doomed him. A child—his brother—was the result of his father's treachery, sparked by his mother's infidelity. And then the doctor—her lover—who had said he could heal them all, confessed that he was at a loss for answers.

"Zuko?" Ursa made daily visits to the turtleduck pond herself, so it was only a matter of time before she would arrive there. Zuko couldn't decide if he had planned for this or not.

"Yes, Mom." He answered her but kept his eyes closed. He found the sounds of the ducks' splashing soothing and the winter breeze refreshing. If he opened his eyes, though, he might have to face the day—the truth.

She sat down beside him. "I've always loved the winter in the Fire Nation."

"Hmm." I've always hated it.

"Of course, it's when you were born."

Yes, lucky me. Zuko sighed.

"I just saw Dr. Jung off. He's going to Ba Sing Se for a few weeks."

"Yes, I know. I saw him yesterday."

"His office was a mess! Some accident with a candle that tipped over, he said. It's a shame he lost half his books, though."

Zuko's eyes shot open. "He…said that's what happened?"

"Well…" Zuko saw in her expression that she knew. They studied each other's faces as if trying to read one another's thoughts. Then she said, "Zuko, why didn't you tell me you were seeing him?"

"I… don't know." Why didn't you tell me he erased your memories?

"Is it helping?"

"I don't know." No, I'm a hopeless case.

"Well, at some point when he was helping me, things got… complicated. So, I hope he has more success with you."

Should I tell her that her little fling sent my father into a jealous rage, and that he used me as bait to lure her back here? He closed his eyes again.

"Zuko, you seem really down. Is there anything I can do?"

"I'll be fine, Mom. It's just been a rough few days, that's all." If I say it out loud, maybe I will believe it. Everything will be ok.

"OK." She lifted a hand toward him, to do what he wasn't sure, but she decided to pull it back instead. "There's always hope, Zuko. The plants may seem dead in the cold of winter, but they're just dormant. They wait for the first ray of sunshine, and then new growth begins."

Hope. Ray of sunshine. Should I tell her about Lee?

Zuko decided not to, but just thinking of the golden-eyed boy made him feel better.

"Greetings, Fire Lord. Wasn't expecting to see you again so soon. Escaping the pressures of palace life?" The innkeeper began pouring a cup of tea for their midday visitor.

"In a sense," Zuko said. "Is Lin around?"

"Oh, you think she makes better tea than me, do you?" The innkeeper smiled and raised an eyebrow. "Lin, someone is here to see you!"

She emerged from the kitchen wearing an apron and an expression that Zuko couldn't quite read. She wasn't surprised to see him, but she wasn't pleased, either.

"Fire Lord Zuko." She bowed.

"I…uh… will Lee be coming by for lunch today?" he asked.

"Um, no, not today. He's fallen a bit ill."

"Oh, no! What's the matter?"

"It's nothing, really. Just the sniffles. You know how kids are in the winter. His nanny thought it best he stay home today. He protested, actually. He's pretty strong-willed."

"Katara, she's a healer. She works in the royal hospital. I can have her take a look at him," Zuko offered.

"It's OK. He'll be fine."

"I…uh…OK." Zuko now felt awkward. He knew he shouldn't have come. The realization hit him mere seconds before the sting of her words did.

"Fire Lord Zuko, I… I'm sure you can do whatever you please, and I'm powerless to stop you, but can I make a request?"

"Of course. Anything." I will not exert my power over you. Please don't see me like him.

"I just want a quiet normal life. For Lee."

"Of course." Without me in it.

"He would be confused. He doesn't know who you are now, but he will. And you draw so much attention. It's nothing personal."

It's very personal. "I understand."

"He's all I have. He's what I cling to. He's my hope."

"He gives me hope, too."

At this, she broke. And Zuko felt renewed anger and hatred for his father burn inside him. The same anger that Dr. Jung said would turn him into his father, no doubt. A form of hatred that made him feel like he's losing control, so perhaps that's why his father worked so hard to always maintain control. It must be a cycle. Anger. Hate. Control.

Through tears she continued, oblivious to the fiery rage that flowed through his blood. "He doesn't know the pain that we do. He didn't even know that my scars were significant… until he saw yours." She shuddered. "I have to shield him from it. He can never know."

The idea that a child of Ozai's could truly be free was enough to calm him, at least in that moment, despite the guilt and desperation he felt. "I wouldn't…" He didn't know what else to say, but he didn't want to let that fleeting sense of hope go, either.

"I know you wouldn't. You're a good man, Fire Lord Zuko. But wouldn't you do the same… for your own son?"

My own son? It hadn't occurred to him until now, but his son would be in Ozai's line as well, and it was his responsibility to make sure that the same pain would never touch his own children. I will break the cycle. So they will be free.

His resolve was firm upon his revelation, and he probably shouldn't have left a crying woman so abruptly. "You're right. I'm sorry I came here, and I will not bother you again."

When he got back to the palace grounds, Katara met him at the gates.

"Zuko, I've been looking for you everywhere! Your uncle is back! And Arik is here!"

A/N: Zuko does go see Dr. Jung before he leaves for Ba Sing Se, but it's not really the confrontation one might expect. That interaction can be found in The Doctor Is In, Chapter 10: Farewell for Now. Dr. Jung has hit a wall, of sorts. Azula needs to reconcile with her mother in order to make progress in her own treatment, but Ursa is pretty fragile herself. Jung has made it his professional goal to rid Ursa of her pain, and he can't understand why she would willingly pursue the person who inflicted the pain in the first place. And with Zuko, he feels like they've made a breakthrough, but is bitter about his office being destroyed.

So, Zuko hit his rock-bottom low on the day in the Agni Kai arena where he faced the reality about his dreams, found out about a new reality that shook his entire world, and then took out his anger by burning Dr. Jung's books. He might have done something to the doctor had he been there, and that realization scared him. He definitely doesn't trust Dr. Jung and will harbor some resentment toward him for a while. There are also some unresolved issues with his mother that they will both have to face sooner or later.

But Zuko reaches a turning point when he meets Lee. He finally catches a glimpse of hope. People would tell him that everything is going to be OK, but he needed something tangible. Seeing proof that something, someone could come from the disaster that is his father and be free from him is what gives Zuko the ability to finally let it go.

He doesn't think about becoming a father himself much because the idea scares the shit out of him. But he knows it will happen according to the prophecy. Lin helps him shift his thinking from the plaguing fear of repeating his father's mistakes with his own children to protecting them at all costs from this cycle of suffering that has been passed down through his family. Again, he just needed a tangible goal, a way to redirect his thinking. The true healing process has begun!