-A Note: Dear Readers, you all are amazing. I can't thank you enough for the reviews and the views. So for those of you who have read this story before when I first posted, you're probably going to notice a big difference. There's a lot of new stuff to this chapter. Mostly just more in-depth and descriptive. I hope you all enjoy and please review! I really love reading them!
My heart is pounding with anger as I throw myself down into the passenger seat of Alex's car. I had ridden to the club earlier in Hanna's car with the other girls so I need a ride home. Alex starts the car and pulls out of the parking lot in the direction of my house. I can't believe the nerve Emily had to say what she did to me concerning Alex. It's none of her fucking business who I am interested in anymore. She doesn't get to be jealous. She didn't chose me. Alex and I sit in silence for a few miles while my head spins with angry thoughts. I tell her to make a turn, breaking the silence, taking a depth breath afterward to calm myself now that the situation is over. Alex doesn't deserve to be ignored.
"I'm sorry about that," I apologize, glancing over at her. She looks calm and cool as if, my previous state of anger doesn't phase her at all. Her face scrunches slightly in concern as she glances over to me quickly before turning her eyes back to the road.
"It's ok," she says softly, reaching over to place her hand on mine. "Really it is." She pats my hand before intertwining her fingers into mine as her palm rests on the back of my hand. The soft skin of her hand feels amazing on mine, causing the back of my hand to tingle. The comfort she instantly brings with only a simple touch causes me to smile slightly.
"If you don't mind my asking, who was that?" She inquires as she turns onto my street. I direct her to my driveway and let her park before turning to face her.
"She's my ex," I say plainly, looking down at my hands. I don't know how else to put it. 'Emily is my everything but she doesn't want me back anymore' doesn't strike me as a very appropriate answer for this situation. I feel the tips of Alex's fingers lightly touching under my chin, politely and silently asking me to look up. Her beautiful eyes, filled with concern, are waiting for me when I look up. She searches my eyes for a second, as if she's trying to peer into my thoughts.
"There's more to it than that, I can tell," she states. Her tone is not angry, jealous or demanding it's calm and patient as if she knows I will tell her in time if I want to. She's not expecting anything but still shows me in the slightest but also most powerful way possible that she is there for me when I'm willing and ready to come to her. Her touch and her soothing voice, allow me to relax even more as I look into her comforting eyes and take her hand in mine. I want to tell her everything so she knows what she might be getting into but I can't. It's all too hard still.
"Alex, there's a lot I should tell you but I don't really know where to start or if I can even manage to talk about it now," I say, letting out an exasperated sigh. "My life the last few years has been really…difficult and not so great." I stumble on my words not really knowing how to sum up three years of torture and the love of my life getting married in one sentence. Alex takes a depth breath while continuing to look into my eyes.
"Well, when or if ever you want to tell me, I'll be here to listen. No judgment," she says giving me an understanding smile. Her smile is infectious, causing me to grin and dip my head. "There's that little head dip I can't get enough of," she adds causing color to rise into my cheeks. I suddenly realize the car is still running and wonder to myself if she was planning on just dropping me off. I get bold and decide to just ask her; I don't want her to leave yet.
"Do you want to come in?" I ask, pointing to the house. Without skipping a beat, she turns the keys to silence the engine and turns back around to me.
"Yes," she says, looking back at me plainly for only a second before a wide, flirty smile erupts from her lips. I smile back and undo my seat belt before turning back to her. As she reaches for the door handle, I intercept her hand and gently pull her back around to connect my lips to her's for a soft but lingering kiss.
"Thank you," I say when I pull away from her lips. "For understanding." She smiles at me without saying anything before getting out of the car. When we meet up at the hood of the car, she snakes an arm around my waist and we walk together in silence just enjoying the other's company. I take her coat after we've entered the house and show her to the kitchen as she scans the house and takes in the details. I noticed the habit quickly into our day together in Philadelphia. Whenever she walked into a room or a new place, her eyes immediately started bouncing from object to object; corner to corner; or person to person. It really is adorable and fascinating to watch. Her nose scrunches as she analyzes the way the light hits off of certain objects and shadows others. Those big green eyes light up when she sees a perfect mix of brilliant color that would stand out well in a photograph. I can't help but smile as she analyzes my house, silently judging what would make a good photograph. I break her concentration, somewhat regretfully because I was very much enjoying watching her, to hand her a beer before showing her into the living room and sitting on the couch. It doesn't take her long to start scanning her eyes around the new room, looking pretty impressed with what she's seeing.
"Wow, this is a really nice place," she says, as she sits down sideways on the couch to face me, crossing one leg under her other thigh.
"My parents left it to me," I admit, taking a sip of my beer. I can't take my eyes off the girl sitting in front of me. She's even more gorgeous in light I can actually see in. Her hair is down; the slight wave in her hair hitting just above her shoulders. Her light-green, short-sleeve shirt, hugs her body in all the right places, showing off her lean but curvy body and complementing the deep green of her eyes. Those eyes catch mine and I let out a nervous laugh, realizing she just caught me staring at her. She flashes me a knowing smirk.
"You know..." She begins, getting up from the couch and setting her beer on the end table. "I think you still owe me a dance, seeing as the first one got interrupted." Her voice is flirty as she extends a hand to help me off the couch. I take it and walk over to the stereo turning on a random radio station that I know is pop, not caring what they play. I then grab her hand and spin her into my arms. We start to sway and relax into each other as she rests her head against my shoulder pulling me as tightly as dancing will allow. I can feel every warm exhale of breath on the sensitive skin of my neck as we slowly sway to the beat. It feels wonderful to have her in my arms but I can't stop thinking about Emily. I never stop thinking about Emily, even when all I want to do is forget about her so I can move on with my life minus the intense hold she has on every single minute fiber of my being. I'm beginning to wonder if it's even possible to ever let go of her.
I do my best to bring myself back to the present and focus on the gorgeous woman in my arms. I pull my consciousness back just in time to feel the physical connection between us begin to grow into a deep tension as she pulls her head back to kiss me, long and hard. I tangle my hand in her thick but smooth hair, pulling her as close as possible. I'm able to pull myself into this moment; focusing only on Alex and her hands running up and down my sides and my back, exploring the tone of my body. She runs her tongue along my bottom lip and I allow it to make its way in to meet mine. As our tongues begin to dance, Alex and I abandon our's and pull each other into an embrace, our arms wrapped tightly around the other. I move my hands to cup her face, carefully guiding her to the couch without breaking the hold our lips have on each other. She feels the couch hit the back of her leg but spins us around to push me down on the couch instead. I'm startled but also deeply aroused by her taking control. The movement causes us to pull apart, allowing me to see the hunger beginning to burn in her eyes as they grow a shade darker. The heat I'm beginning to feel intensifies a hundred-fold the second Alex straddles my lap and places her lips on my neck. My entire body shudders in delight, a deep moan escaping my lips.
I forgot how good it feels to be touched and kissed like this. I can't think of anything but Alex's lips on my neck and her fingers lightly running up my side. My mind and body (definitely my body) are completely in the now with Emily nowhere in sight and I'll be damned if I don't take advantage of every second of this. I grip her waist tighter as her small movements send another surge of electricity rushing though my body. I kiss her shoulder before kissing her neck and eventually make my way to her lips. Gently, I suck her bottom lip into my mouth to playful bite down preventing her from trying to pull away. I can tell she likes it when she lets out a deep, satisfied breath that verges on being considered a moan. Her hands continue to explore my body until they reach the hem of my shirt. Her hands slip underneath causing my flesh to burn out of desire for more of her touch. As she begins to pull off my shirt, I suddenly become very aware and subconscious of the scars I normally keep as hidden as possible. I immediately pull back from the kiss and grab her hands, pausing her movements. The look on my face has to convey panic as my eyes widen and I flap my mouth trying to put words together frantically. She searches my face, her eyes brows pinched together in confusion.
"I...ummm...my...uh...wounds," I manage to stutter out, almost whispering the last word. Her faces ease as she realizes what I'm trying to say. She obviously knows I just returned from overseas but she had no idea until a second ago that I had even be hurt, let alone tortured and beaten with an inch of my life on more than one occasion. Nonetheless, she leans in to give me a lingering kiss before pulling back again. She returns her hands to my hips, easing the tips of her fingers under my shirt. Alex looks up at me, silently asking for permission to take it off. I give her a slow, small nod despite being terrified and apprehensive as to how she will react when she sees my flawed skin. Slowly and gently, she pulls my shirt over my head and tosses it on the floor catching a full view of my tattered upper body. I watch her face expecting to see disgust but instead I see nothing but want. She traces the scars around my rib cage with a very light, tingling touch before leaning down and kissing the sensitive skin at bottom edge of my rib cage. The feeling the touch elicits causes me to buck my hips and arch my back a little, intensifying the heat now coursing through me. She motions for me to shift so that we are laying along the couch. As I lay down, I grab her shirt and lift it quickly over her head, gasping at the beautiful, flawless skin it reveals. Her purple bra cups her breasts perfectly making me ache to feel them against mine. We make quick work of the rest of our clothes before she slowly eases herself on top of me. I feel every inch of her body as it connects with my skin. When she's fully on top of me, a thigh pressing firmly between my legs, teasing me, I grip my fingers into her back in an effort to release some tension.
She begins to place kisses down my neck, stopping right above my breast. I moan in frustration when she pulls away but open my eyes to see her looking at my chest. Before I can feel any sort of embarrassment from the condition of my body, she grazes her hands across my chest ending with both hands cupping my breasts. I moan again, this time from utterly intense pleasure. She pauses to look down into my eyes before leaning down to kiss me on the mouth again. "You're beautiful," she whispers pulling away only inches from my face. She refuses to let me argue the fact by placing another kiss on my lips and running a hand up the inside of my thigh. Any words I was thinking about uttering are lost, replaced by the best kind of burning sensation on my inner thigh. Alex's fingers reach their target and all the buildup suddenly explodes inside of me as she finally touches me where I need to most. Because it's been so long, my body reacts immediately, taking almost no time to release the pleasurable tension coursing through my body with every movement of Alex's hand. Before long, my moans become louder and my back arches as I gets the release I so desperately need.
Alex slowly helps me come down from my high by placing light kisses on my cheeks as she curls up next to me, letting me hold her. Several minutes must pass before I can even try to string together any sort of thoughts. When I'm finally able to open my eyes, I look into her beautiful eyes which are darker and more intense than I've ever seen them. I press my lips to hers hard and passionately before pulling her up and leading her up the stairs. It's my turn to return the pleasure she just bestowed upon me.
I kneel in the sand with the dry, scorching heat of the sun bearing down on me relentlessly. My scalp burns and relentlessly stings as a hand holds my head back by my hair, forcing me to watch the first of my men being tortured to death. He's kneeled down directly across from me and the others in our squad, his arms being held out to his sides. Blood flows down his face and his sides in steady streams staining the deep golden of the sand with a contrasting crimson. Pain, anguish and fear flash across his face with each crack of the whip being laid across his helpless body. Every crack I hear is accompanied by a scream, much like the thunder and lightning of an approaching storm. I wince with every strike, helpless to save him or even ease his pain. His eyes connect with mine as his body sags further and the screams grow weak. I hold his gaze, vainly attempting to give him any type of comfort I can. The agony I see is gone a moment later when the last crack of the whip drains the life from him...
I sit up with a start, gasping for breath, not knowing where I am. My fear and alarm quickly melt to confusion when I realize I'm at home, in my bed, naked with my heart racing uncontrollably.
"Paige?" I hear a voice behind me say gently before feeling a soft touch on my upper arm. I whip around quickly, startled by the touch, to see Alex, still here and still naked as well. My heart rate slows as the familiarity of the room mixed with the comfort of Alex's eyes and soft touch conquer my nightmare.
"Are you ok?" She inquires, looking into my eyes. I give her a small nod, taking several more deep breaths. She pulls me into a hug and runs her hand through my hair, calming me even more.
"I had a nightmare," I say, not wanting to keep her in the dark. "A nightmare about a painful memory." She kisses the top of my head before I pull away to face her. "I want to tell you about everything. Everything that happened to me in the army, how I got these scars, why my ex made me so upset last night," I say calmly trying to gauge her emotions. "I want to tell you all of it. Do you have to be anywhere today?" She shakes her head before leaning in to kiss me, cupping my cheek with her hand.
"I can't think of anywhere else I want to be," she says give me a smile.
We get up from the bed and I excuse myself to the bathroom after extending an invitation to any of my clothes. I'm pleasantly surprised upon exiting the bathroom to find Alex sitting at the foot of the bed waiting for me in her underwear and one of my over-sized flannels. Only two of the buttons are done making it clear the shirt is in fact all she is wearing on her top half. Her hair is adorably messy from sleep, only adding to the sexy she is exuding. I'm about to pin her back down onto the bed, unable to control myself when she denies me by standing up and walking to the door with a satisfied and smug smirk on her face. I let out a loud playful groan before following her out the door and downstairs to make breakfast and start telling my story.
I wait till we finish with our food and then begin to tell the long and painful story of the last few years of my life. I start from the beginning with my enrollment in the ROTC in college through which I became an officer upon completing, entering the service immediately after. I explain about my life before my capture with Emily and the love we shared. She frowns signaling that she's not sure where this story is going or if she likes what she is hearing. I know it must be hard to hear because it's difficult to talk about, especially to someone I'm beginning to care for. I can tell she's becoming more confused and uneasy the more I talk about Emily and me. I'm sure she must be wondering why we aren't together if we were so deeply in love. It's then that I start into the last three and a half years of my life and let the pieces fall where they may.
I share the details of my capture earning a loud gasp in response. Alex covers her mouth with her hands as she continues to listen to my own personal horror story. After last night, she had to have suspicions as to the origins of my scars but I can tell by the anguish written on her face that she was not expecting anything close to this magnitude. I do my best to tell her as much as I can without being too graphic. When I finally complete my story, she sits there speechless with her hands still covering her mouth. I look down at my empty plate hope that my past as well as my current situation with Emily won't push her away.
"Oh my God, Paige," she eventually sighs out, placing a hand on mine.
"I understand if it's too much to deal with," I reluctantly say, not looking up. "We just met and if being with me is too much, I get it. I just wanted you to know."
"I'm not going anywhere," she states leaning her head down and to the side to get me to look at her. "I really like you Paige and I want to keep seeing you, if you want to keep seeing me. I don't care about your past." I look into her eyes and see complete understanding and caring. I relax a little, happy that she likes me enough to stick around. I lean in to give her a full and passionate kiss. When we break it, I lean my forehead against hers and say, "You're amazing." She lets out a little chuckle in response before pulling me into the first of many kisses we'd give each other that day, never leaving the house once.