Chapter 49-Open Door

Elsa slammed the door shut louder than what she wanted, but Elsa knew no one was going to come to inspect the noise; there was no one to anyway. She locked her door. Elsa moved quickly but then stopped just as suddenly after realizing she had nowhere to go. Elsa knew that this was no time for her to be running off anywhere, so she made the conscious choice of going to her room, but wanted far than ever to run. Snow began to fall in her room.

Elsa looked around but no corner, walls, or the sheets of her bed look right, so she ended up just standing in the center of her room. Elsa caught a glimpse of herself in the wall mirror she has hanging. It was the first time since she woken up that she had a good look of herself: her skin color had regain much of its color, along with her hair, though there were still some pale locks remaining. She brought her hands together and could tell that the feeling of heat has returned to her body…Elsa willed herself to think of anything besides Jack, but in vain all her thoughts kept going back to him: to every moment, every meeting, every word, smiles, laughs, anger, pain…

So instead of fighting against it now, she tries to remember every detail she could about Jack. The most difficult memories for Elsa to recall were the tangible ones. Elsa wanted to remember the way how his skin and hair felt; both surprisingly smooth but cold; his scent, nothing but cold air…Elsa made a second realization at that point to what Jack had been warning her about. So her legs collapsed under her and she ended up kneeling defeated on the floor. Elsa really had nothing tangible about Jack to hold on to, not even the way how his clothes felt whenever he held her close. Everything about him was cold, and without the solidarity—without his actual physical touches, Elsa realized that Jack may as well be a chilling breeze or air, and the images of him in her memories can easily be forgotten over time.

No, I can't think like that! She told herself. Elsa also felt her heart beating faster, and her mind panicking more and more over the thought that time was going to slowly erase Jack from her.

There was a soft knocking at the door. "Elsa?" It was Anna. "Elsa I know you're in there…Please open the door this time. Please Elsa…I'm here for you."

Elsa thought about it for a second and though felt that she owed her sister this, to open her door to her sister's plea after all they've been through together. But Elsa wanted to be alone, and she hasn't shared the fact about herself and Jack seeing one another to Anna yet…And in her current state, Elsa doesn't think she can bring herself to talk about him calmly. Elsa forced herself to stand and once more to walk over to the door and tell her sister to leave; she was surprised by how fast the snow had accumulated in her room, but that didn't distract her for a second.

Elsa laid a hand against the wood as though she was placing it gently on her own sister's shoulder. "Anna, I understand you are worried about me, and I should open my door to you, but—"

"—Elsa I know about you and Jack," Anna blurted suddenly, halting Elsa in her words.

"...What…?" she asked weakly.

In a much softer voice, Anna continues to speak. "Elsa…I know about you and Jack; I know that the two of you were seeing each other…Jack told me so himself."

Elsa couldn't believe it, and unconsciously unlocked her door and opened it. The queen froze before her sister. Anna was in her winter clothing with the absent of her cap, something Elsa assumed she thought of ahead of time to prepare for. But that wasn't what made Elsa froze, it was what Anna was holding in the palm of her hands. It was Jack's dew necklace. "When Kristoff and I managed to find you, most of the pile of snow in front of you had already been blown away leaving the dew poking out of the surface."

Elsa stepped away from the door, and Anna stepped in, gently closing the door behind her. With her right hand, Anna took the dew by its lace and handed it over to her sister's open palm. Elsa looked at the dew solemnly as the tears begin to fall. "He really told you?" Elsa asked shakenly, to which Anna nodded her head. "But why…?"

"Because he was worried for you. Jack was worried that you may never tell me about your relationship, and that you may hide your feelings about it even when you're unable to see him anymore. So Jack wanted someone to be there whenever you want to talk about him. Your relationship isn't up for public knowledge, and Rapunzel isn't always going to be around; but I am you sister, and Jack knew that I am always going to be there for you. I just needed to know what was going on in your life."

Elsa finally looked Anna in the eyes; she was giving such a warm and comforting smile to her, that it reminded Elsa of that time during the Frozen Incident; when Anna came into the ice palace and offer the same comfort and warmth, and encouragement to come down the mountain, together.

Elsa reached out a hand towards her sister. "A-Anna…" Without hesitation, her sister reached out her own hand and pulled her close. Elsa ended up morning as she was brought into Anna's embrace; she wallowed her words in muffled cries.

"I know," Anna said as calmly as possible, but her own voice was breaking, "I know…" Together they gently sank down onto the floor, with Anna's back against the door, and Elsa sobbing against her chest.

For a long while, Elsa continued to cry and ended up telling Anna what had happen after they were separated during the fight. Pitch had taken her hostage and used her as bait to distract Jack. Once he tried to save her, Pitch took advantage of Jack's distraction and stabbed him with his scythe, and then tossed his body into the forest. "I-It was all my fault Anna. If it wasn't for me, then Jack wouldn't have died."

"No Elsa, it wasn't your fault," Anna cooed.

"But I made it so that Jack was venerable; because he fell in love with me he…If only he…if only we hadn't…It's all my fault."

"Elsa no, Jack offered his life up in the Pact, remember? So even if he had never fallen for you, he would've still given up his life to save you, as it is part of his Guardianship in order to protect the children of the world."

"That doesn't matter at all Anna—I didn't want Jack to die!"

"…You're right. But what you said yourself doesn't matter either." Elsa couldn't respond. "If only this, if only that: if only Rapunzel wasn't pregnant, if only this war never happen, if only I'd never been such an idiot with Hans…if only mamma and papa never went to the wedding…All these ifs, they don't change the fact that what we wish haven't happen did happen."

Elsa suddenly thought about Hiccup and what they had discussed when she went seeking shelter from wondering eyes. For a long while the sisters didn't say anything to each other, and the accumulation of snow eventually stop as Elsa slowly regains some calmness. "I'm sorry Anna."

"For what?"

"For not telling you about me and Jack. I should've been the one to tell you."

Anna sighed and adjusted herself to be in a more comfortable position. "You know something Elsa? When Jack first told me about the two of you seeing each other, I thought Jack was being ridiculous."

Perplexed, Elsa turned her head in order to see her sister. "When he first told me you could probably image how happy I was for the both of you; I think I even ended up overwhelming Jack with all my and questions. He may have just wanted to get back at me for probing, but I just thought that it was silly; the way he tried to explain to me about love between a Being and Human. He had some solid good points but does it even matter? The way how I see it, is that love is love, difficulties are bound to it no matter what form it takes. Whether it is different social status, long distance relationships or other complication; love just takes time and effort to maintain, and most importantly, the willingness to risk the chance of getting hurt." For a long while, Elsa thought about what Anna said and ended up laugh quietly inside. "…So Elsa, I'm only asking this because I'm worried for you but…do you regret ever falling in love with Jack"

Elsa chuckled faintly out loud as she sat herself upright. Elsa then took in a deep breath and all the snow in the room disappeared. "No," she said softly.

"And I'm willing to bet that Jack had no regrets falling for you or even dying for you. You meant a whole lot to him Elsa; I felt it, even when he avoided talking about with me."

"But still," Elsa started, though stopped for a second when she felt the tears started coming again. "I wish losing Jack didn't have to hurt so much."

Anna brought her sister in close into her embrace again. "I can only imagen; I-I would probably feel the same as you if I ever lost Kristoff—I mean I wouldn't know what to do with myself—o-or how to handle it or—"

"That won't happen," Elsa said firmly, feeling a flushed kindled of energy inside her chest, "I won't let it. I may have lost Jack but I won't let my sister go through the same thing as me."

Anna released a half sigh and half laugh, in which Elsa could tell that her sister appreciated what she'd said, however... "Alright than…please be there for me if anything does happen?" Anna whispered into Elsa's ear. To which Elsa also replied in the same manner, "Of course I will be there for you, just as you are here with me now…Anna?" Her sister hummed in response. "I love you."

"And I love you too."